Have you guys seen the Vine where the girl is on the phone and she's like I just got back from the clinic and I found out I was pregnant and the dude on the other line is like no, sorry and hangs up then the girl's two friends are like he hung up on her! That's literally all I thought about writing the end of that last chapter....
(insert key smash)
________________________
"Did he just- he just hung up on me!" I pout as I stare at my blank screen.
Hailey sighs and leans over the marble counter top, "Well what did he say?" Her chin rests on her hand and her blonde hair topples over her shoulders.
I rub my temples, closing my tired eyes in the process. He knows I can't go...
But he also knows that if he keeps asking, I'll say yes which is not an option. Maybe I should just block him–no. That would actually be a terrible idea.
After a few long seconds I inform my impatient friend of the conversation.
"Okay, so at first I'm like 'hey', and he's like 'hi', then he just comes out and says that he wants me there with him. I tried to change the subject, but he asked again and I didn't say anything," I pause. "So after like two seconds he's like 'say something!'" I whisper-yell to mock him. "And of course, I don't know what to say so I tell him that he knows I can't." I run my hands through my messy hair. "And then he hung up!" I throw my arms up in defeat.
Hailey's eyes roll to the back of her head before she face-palms herself, then me next.
"Ow," I squeal, squeezing my eyes shut.
"Jos, go with him."
Wow, even my own best friend is turning against me.
"Why?" I ask, "So I can be kidnapped and traded into a gang? Yeah, that sounds great," I sarcastically remark as my eyes roll.
"Josie, you know he's not gonna let anything happen to you, not this time. You're safer with him than you are here anyways," She taunts me with facts.
I scrunch my face in frustration, "Stop being right!" I just want to be wrong in peace.
"Just think about it, you'd be a sucky bartender anyways," She giggles. "I gotta go," She grabs her jacket. "I've got work, but think about what I said," She sings as she heads out the door.
"'No!" I grunt just before the door slams shut.
Now that I think about it, there isn't much to think about. I should've gone with him, and that's really it.
I just want to live my best life and nothing about living the way I am currently is considered being the best.
• • •
I toss and turn in the large empty bed in the late hours of the night, wishing that I wasn't here alone.
I should call him.
Would he answer me at three A.M.?
I mean, would he answer me at all?
I take a second to find his number and I wait as the rings feel like they are minutes apart.
He's not going to answer.
Seven seconds left until it goes to voice mail.
Ring.
Six seconds.
Ring.
Five seconds.
No ring.
"H-hello?" I speak with a shaky voice.
Only his soft breathing consumes my ears.
"I miss you," I continue. My heart feels like it's going to spew from my throat.
He might as well have not answered at all. I would've been less disappointed than I am now considering I was anticipating him to ignore the call.
He still says nothing.
"What are you doing?" I ask in hopes that he'll talk and I can hear his voice.
"Uhm," He pauses, "Nothing."
My eyes get hot and heavy.
"D-do you...miss me?" I'm desperate.
"Yeah." He sounds tired.
A few still moments pass.
"Is it too late to be where you are? With you?" I ask quietly.
"No. It never is," He tells me.
"O-okay." I cover my eyes with my arm even though I'm by myself.
"Please," He pleads. Almost like he's begging.
"Oka-"
"Please," He repeats, breathlessly.
"I will, I will," I assure him. "I'll go."
"Why'd you change your mind?" He asks.
"I... don't know. I guess I just want to be with you." I admit.
"It killed me to think that you didn't." It's like he's trying to make me feel bad.
My heart.
"It wasn't even that, it was just that–I just didn't think it was a good idea, you know?" I try to reason.
"You know I won't let anything happen to you, right? Not again... Not again," He repeats.
"I know. Don't be so hard on yourself. It wasn't your fault so don't think-"
"Yes it was. It was my fault, it was all my fault. Everything is my fault," He barks.
"Gage, stop it!" I can't have him doing this again. "Please."
"I could've stopped it, but I didn't so it was my fault and-"
"Stop blaming yourself for everything that goes wrong. You're not at fault and I want you to know that. I need you to know that, okay?"
He doesn't answer me.
It hurts so bad to know that I'm not with him right now. That would make all the difference.
"Th-then why aren't you here with me, huh? Because of me. It's because you're scared of me and don't want to be around me anymore," His voice shakes.
"Gage, I love you, and for some strange reason that will never change. Don't forget that. And I do want to be around you, I want to be with you right now and I hate that I'm not," I tell him truthfully.
His breathing is loud and rugged. If he's crying right now I'll never forgive myself. I barely even notice the stream of tears rushing down the sides of my face, into my hair.
"I love you," I tell him again. "More than you know." He needs to know.
___________________________
I wanna make the rest of this book a part two like in another book. PLEASE LET ME KNOW IF YOU WOULD READ IT because otherwise this will be coming to an end soon, but hopefully not. :))