The hardest thing in my life is..to watch the one I love suffer the pain that is I even don't know how to take from them. I always act dork and silly, wishing everyone will never suffer such painful thing as mine. She sat across the room, sitting on the couch, back facing me, sobbing silently. I want to stop it, but, may be it will gonna make her feel better. To make the beautiful rainbow, sometimes we need a hard and worst storm, aren't we?
"Barbie." I call her softly, earning her attention. Even though I didn't see her face, I can see the tense on her back when she straighten her back, she softly put her hand on her face hiding her eyes and then look at my direction.
"What?" her voice is still shaking by her crying. I bet her heart felt so much pain, she didn't stop crying even after 20 minutes I waited for her to calm down.
"Come here. Talk with me. Cry with me." I said make her take away the hand she use to covering her watery eyes. Come here Barbie, our heart is the same anyway, we are doomed. She then stand up and walk to my side, taking the chair and drag it to my side. She take a seat and then put her both hands on her lap, her head got lower watching her beautiful nail.
"How's the head?" she hesitantly ask me, still not facing me.
"It's okay. Do you get hurt?" she shakes her head as the response of my question, her lip is still trembling holding the pain which is evaporated to be the tears.
"You should've just make it easy for me." I look at her face, watching the scratch on her right cheek, who made that again? Does she really fight the girls? "You should've just make me the one who got hit by the vase." No, how could I? "You should've never set me on fire."
"I am sorry." I said softly bring her hand with mine on my laps. The throbs on my head is so painful, but the timing might will never show up twice in a week. "I'm sorry if I let your heart breaking." I look at her eyes, the tears fall and fall. "My hands are too busy to fix my own." I kissed her hand smoothly, sending the fresh lavender scene I love the most to my brain. Make the pain goes away, this is the magic she could do to me. A comfortable.
"That's okay. You never do the wrong thing. I understand you." she said softly watching my eyes, and my heart suddenly feel like stopped beating. "Maybe.." she tighten her hold on my hands. "Maybe if I were you, I will do the same." Liar. You never did that with B.I, your ex. You might still hang out with him, but then Jennie lighten me, she tell me that I was the one who made you choose to make me choosing.
If you blame her, you are really an asshole. She want you to choose her, but you are still confuse. So she made you choose. Jennie is a savage, she doesn't care how my feeling when she spill out the truth. I was the one who act like a victim. When I made you as the one.
"Let's be friend!" I tell her while caressing her chin, touching her soft and fair skin, I still want you Barbie. That's when her emotion turn off again, facing me with her cold expression, I am afraid. Am I lost her again?
"But I don't believe that lovers can be friends again." True. Let's not be friends, let's be lovers again.
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"Call me again!" He huskily whispering to my ear, make the goose bump creeping under my shirt. "Call me!"
"Kookie." I spell the mantra over and over again as his hand touching the body and my heart. I should've just disappear once I felt my heart aches by his words. He said he want to be friend with me. What kind of friend we could be anyway, how can we be friend.
"Not that." Said him demanding me to call his by that thing again. His soft lips is touching my neck make me shivering in delight. There I moan against him, try to remind myself that his head is still hurt. Gently put the hands on his chest and look down wanting his lips so bad on mine.
"Oppa." Another mantra and then he cursed his low fuck before he smash my lips with his. So soft, so cold, calming the fire in me. His hand then touching my neck, my hips down to my ass. Push it to make me grinding my lower to his bulge. I was sit on top of him, don't exactly how can I got on top of him. I still wear my timberland, my fortune shoes.
"Love." He said that words between the kisses, make me wonder if it's his heart or the lust which is make him say that. "Love you." he then deepened the kiss, holding the back of my neck biting my lips and have war with my tongue. "I love you." his hand is now tugging my blouse, hold it up to expose my yellow bra.
His kisses become harsher and sloppier as he bite my neck like a vampire who's wanting to suck the blood out from my body. Take it, make me yours. "Oppa." I call him again when he reach my bosom and squish it, burden me with a strange feeling, the strange feel which is make me want more. "More." It's lust. Or is it a love?
"Kookie oppa-" my breath hitched when he kiss my cleavage, it feels tickled but damn feel good. His hand is already on my back when I sway my head backward when the feeling feels too much for me to handle. I want to run away, but I still want more. And more.
"Stop me." He ask me, but what can I do? I am only the slave of him. "I want you, Barbie." He growled desperately taking my head to the front and holding my chin, make me face him fully. "I want you." he tell me again pleading with his eyes, shutting down the fire in me. I am lost. Lost. On this hospital white mattress I surrender and forgot everything I had in my mind completely, had no shame begging for his touch more and more.
Please me, Jungkook oppa.