After I help the boys bring in the alcohol I make my way back upstairs. I really should be getting ready, but it doesn't really matter that much if I'm not downstairs when it starts, I mean, it's my party... Kind of.
I text Stefanie to find out what time she's coming over, and she promises she's already on her way... Yeah right.
I browse through my wardrobe slowly, trying to find something simple yet flattering. My eyes catch my purple floor length dress, but I decide it's way too formal. I look through my skirts but decide they're all too short. And then finally I find my simple black laced dress. It's tight, and the back is missing, but it's more modest than my other options.
I quickly shower, shaving and scrubbing myself clean. After washing my hair I sigh and decide I better get out. With my towel wrapped around me, I go into my room and look at the time. Twenty minutes have passed, and I roll my eyes, texting Stefanie. 'Where are you bitch?'
I quickly dry myself before putting my gstring and bra on. I stop and look at myself in the mirror. My long dark hair is hanging down to my chest, wet from my shower. My eyes are dull, and my nose is tiny, and my eyelashes aren't that long, and I can't help but pick out the countless flaws on my face, and I can't understand why Caleb kissed me. I'm so plain.
There's a knock on the front door and I pull away from my reflection, throwing a long sleeved top on quickly before heading downstairs. The doorbell rings now, and I shake my head. "Jacob, you lazy ass!"
"Shut up," Jake says, shoving his face with chips. He pulls a face when he sees me, quickly closing his eyes. "Ew, Kasey, put some fucking clothes on,"
"Shut up," I repeat him, poking my tongue out even though he can't see me. I open the door and grin at Stefanie. "Hey, bitch,"
"Hi loser," She huffs, stepping into the house. "What the hell took you so long to open the door?"
"I was showering," I point out. I nod my head at Jacob. "And he's so lazy. Besides, it's been like half an hour, miss 'give me ten',"
"Sorry," She grins sheepishly. She gestures down to the deep purple dress she's in. It has a split up the side of it, enticing whoever looks at it to wonder what's underneath. There are small sequences along the neck piece, and damn, Stefanie looks good in purple. "I couldn't find anything that really stole my attention,"
"You've stolen my attention in that dress," I laugh, closing the front door. We move through the hallway and when we pass the lounge room both boys are lounging on the couch. "Jake, Cay, doesn't Stefanie look lavishing?"
Caleb looks toward us. "Stefanie you look beautiful," He grins, and then I blush when I realize his gaze has now moved to my legs. He smirks. "So do you Kase,"
Jacob looks up from the television now, his hawk hearing not failing to pick up on Caleb's compliment to me. Jake glares at his best friend slightly before looking up at us, and I'm surprised he takes a double look at Stefanie. He whistles low. "Damn, Stef,"
Stefanie shakes her head but I notice the slight red tinge on her cheeks.
"Right, well we'll be getting ready now," I say, grabbing Stef's hand. "Boys close your eyes so you don't see my ass,"
Caleb makes a quiet comment to Jacob that I don't hear, which I'm glad for because Jake punches his friend in the shoulder roughly, a frown on his face. Caleb ignores it and winks at me.
I ignore them both and pull Stefanie upstairs with me. When we get into my room I quickly close the door. Stefanie stares at me from her position my bed, playing with her straightened hair as she raises her brows at me.
"I kissed Caleb," I blurt out quickly, knowing she would have gotten it out of me eventually anyway.
"What?" Her eyes widen. "How and when and why did this happen?"
"When I got home from school," I sigh and take my shirt off. I grab my dress and pull it over my head, shimmying a little to get it down over my body. It's really tight. "I took the front seat by force, and then he chased me up here..."
"Wait, it happened in here?" She asks, a little too loudly, her eyes shining with her excitement. "What else happened?"
"Nothing!" I say quickly. "I mean, he chased me up here, tickled me, made me say please and then promise to never take his seat again, and then... Well he told me to kiss him,"
"Damn," She draws, whistling afterwards. "He is a piece of work, that boy,"
"I know," I groan, turning my straightener on to let it heat up. "And to be honest, I don't know where we stand. Don't get me wrong, I know he's a player, but then afterwards he like, pecked me,"
"Peck?" She asks, her eyebrows going higher. "Wow, players don't usually peck girls,"
"That's what I thought!" I exclaim, beginning to put curls through my hair. "But I don't want to get my hopes up, you know?"
"Yeah, I get you," She sighs, coming to stand beside me. She takes the straightener from me. "I'll do your hair for you. Anyway, back to Caleb, you have to be careful even more because of Matt,"
"I know," I groan, sitting on the floor and letting Stefanie take control of my hair. "Matt is so cute, and even though he's really cocky, I don't know, I kind of like him. But..."
"But?" She prompts when I trail off.
"Well I like Caleb more," I admit honestly. "And I'm, you know, physically attracted to him. Matthew is good looking, sure, but I'm just not hot for him the way I am for Caleb,"
"Damn, you little whore," She giggles, and I see her shake her head through my full length mirror. Loud music suddenly sounds from downstairs but we ignore it, already way too use to it. "But I understand what you mean. I guess you'll just have to see how tonight goes with Matt, and see how Caleb reacts around you,"
"Yeah, well," I shrug. "I don't want to let go of Matt because there's a chance Caleb doesn't like me in any way other than physically, but that's basically using Matt... I don't know, Stef, I'm a sucky person,"
"No you aren't," She rolls her eyes. "Don't overthink anything, or at least don't let it make you feel shit. Let's just see how tonight goes,"
After my hair is finished and I've done my make up, we make our way back downstairs. The party is already in full swing, and there are people everywhere.
We enter the kitchen, and not even a few minutes later Taylor approaches us. He smiles at Stefanie and me, passing us both a beer. "How are you lovely ladies tonight?"
"They're fine," Jacob suddenly says, his expression icy as he stares at Taylor's hand that rests on Stef's waist. "And sober. And that's how they'll stay,"
Before I know it Jacob has taken my already half empty beer from my hands, as well as Stefanie's, and then he leave the kitchen, his demeanor rigid.
"What the hell," I mutter to Stef. "What's his problem? Especially with you?"
"I don't know," Stefanie shrugs. "You know what he's like, he's a freak,"
I nod slowly, although that doesn't seem completely right to me. He's never been protective of Stefanie, too.
"Babe do you mind if I go and dance with Taylor?" Stefanie yells over the music, another beer already in her hand and a big grin stretched across her face.
"Of course not, Stef, go," I grin back at her, shoving her into Taylor playfully. "Go and have fun, kids. Safe fun, that is,"
They both chuckle before walking away from me. I scan the kitchen to see a few small groups of people hanging around, and I make my to the fridge. I look inside but see no alcohol that appeals to me, and so I open the cupboard above the fridge. I find Jack Daniels, Jim Beam, Smirnoff, Bailey's, and countless other unmixed drinks and I smirk. "Jackpot,"
I grab the Smirnoff and three plastic shot glasses. I fill all three of them up and grab another glass. I take the Jim Beam and fill half the glass with it before adding coke. I need a chaser, otherwise I'll dry reach.
I down the three shots, one after the other, before sculling my glass of Jimmy and coke. My throat burns for a second, but I don't hesitate pouring another three shots and another chaser.
Suddenly Caleb appears beside me, a beer in his hand and his face set in a hard glare. "Slow the fuck down,"
"Whoa," I frown at him before downing one of the shots before slowly swaying my hips and sinking to the floor a little before shimmying back up. I smirk at him. "You need to loosen up!"
His eyes narrow and then a loud bang can be heard from the hallway. His eyes leave me to glance in the direction before he looks back to me. "No, you need to stop drinking. I'll be back to finish this in a second,"
He shoves past me a little roughly, heading in the direction that the noise sounded from. I shake my head and decide not to wait for his return, and after taking my shots I grab my chaser and head into the lounge room.
It doesn't take me long to find Matthew, he's amongst his friends against the back wall of my lounge room. I watch him muck around with his friends as they watch the sweaty bodies that fill the makeshift dance floor.
Deciding not to bother Matt while he's with his friends, I push through some people and begin dancing next to a couple of random senior girls. I dance with the girls for a few songs until one of them decides she needs a drink. I say goodbye to them and continue to dance on my own, loving the buzzed feeling from the alcohol.
When I spin around during mid dance I bump straight into Matthew. I down my chaser and shove it into the hands of a random beside me before grabbing Matt's hand and leading him further into the crowded space of dancing teenagers.
"Have you been here the whole time?" Matt asks, a worried look on his face.
"Only since I was born?" I raise my eyebrow, moving my hips and beginning my dancing again. Does he realize I live here?
"Oh, haha," He laughs awkwardly before grabbing onto my hips. He suddenly smirks before turning my body so that I'm facing away from him. He pulls me against him and then whispers into my ear. "Dance now, babe,"
I shake my head, a smirk on my face. I turn back around to face him and rest my hand on his chest, leaning up so I can whisper back to him. "I'm not that kind of girl, but I'll see how I'm feeling after another drink,"
When I pull away he's grinning at me, his eyes running down the length of my body. "Okay. Grab me a beer?"
I nod and then stay where I am, watching as his eyes move away from me to roam the people around us, his eyes calculated as he searches for something, or someone.
"Kasey weren't you going somewhere?" He suddenly asks, pulling me from my thoughts and my staring.
I nod and turn away from him, making my way back towards the kitchen. I grab two beers and head straight back to Matt, throwing one to him. He pulls my back against his front again, and this time I let him.
We dance for ages, until my feet are killing me and I'm basically struggling to breathe amongst the smell of sweat, smoke and sex. I pull away from Matthew, breathing heavily. "I'm out for a while, Matt, I can't breathe, I need air,"
"Okay, babe," He says, leaning down to kiss me cheek. "I'll meet you back here in twenty minutes?"
"Sure," I giggle. He smirks before turning and walking away, over towards his friends that are still against the wall. My gaze falls to his cute little ass and I bite my lip. Damn.
I find Stefanie a few minutes later, raiding Jacob's stash. When she turns around to see me, the Smirnoff bottle in her hand, she squeals. "Kasey! Where have you been?"
"Just around..." A grin falls onto my face. "With Matthew,"
She grins, shaking her head and placing the Smirnoff on the bench. "You little slut!"
"Shut up!" I giggle. "He's cute,"
Stefanie attacks me with a hug before pulling away and kissing me on the lips. That's always the telltale sign that Stefanie's drunk, because she enjoys making out with me whenever she is.
Suddenly she's pulled away from me and I look behind her to see it's due to Caleb. His face is angry again, his eyes disbelieving. "There are boys watching you!"
"Who cares!" I exclaim loudly, raising my UDL can to the air and grinning broadly. "We don't!"
"Yeah, well, I fucking do," Caleb whispers harshly, grabbing my wrist. "Maybe you should do that bloody shit in your own god damn time,"
I frown and look to my right to see Stefanie frowning. She shrugs at me before grabbing the Smirnoff bottle and escaping Caleb's wrath easily, heading out into the hallway.
I turn back to face Caleb who slowly shakes his head, a smirk forming on his face. "If you really want to do that," He begins to move closer to me. I subconsciously step backwards and then I'm leaning against the kitchen bench. "I'm right here,"
I stay silent as he brings his arms around my waist and rests his hands on my ass. He inches his face closer, his lips too close to mine for any onlookers to take our position as innocent.
"No," I say slowly, shaking my head. I push him away from me and he frowns. "I need to go and meet Matthew,"
There's nothing I want more than to be in that position with Caleb, kissing him senseless like this morning. But in the same breath, I've done the right thing moving away because I will otherwise easily fall for his games.
I hurry back towards my meeting spot with Matthew because it's been much longer than twenty minutes. But he isn't there.
I slowly move around the lounge room, keeping my eyes focused for his face. I see his friends in their corner, but Matthew isn't with them. After searching the dance area and the spaces surrounding it, I decide he mustn't be in here. Maybe he needed the toilet.
He isn't in the bathroom. I only just checked the lounge room, and beforehand I was in the kitchen. I know he isn't in any of those areas. Upstairs was blocked off by Jacob and Caleb nearly an hour ago, so he can't be on the second floor.
I decide to check the backyard but there's too many people in my way to use the back doors. I decide to go through the laundry. On my way there, I see Stefanie slap Taylor in the face and I freeze, frowning. What the hell?
I go to head towards her but stop when I see her down her drink and grab another boy's hand, leading him back through to the lounge room. I guess she's okay, then.
When I open the laundry door I feel like I'm the one who Stefanie just slapped in the face. The two people in front of me break apart, startled by being interrupted. My eyes follow his hand that is clearly up her top, and when she sees me, Brooke smirks, her eyes triumphant.
"Oh my God," He says and my eyes move from Brooke to Matthew, who hurriedly stands and separates himself from the leech beside him. He moves closer to me, his hands raised as if he's surrendering. "Babe, it's not what it looks like,"
I shake my head, forcing a laugh that sounds harsh even to me. "Fuck you, Matt,"
I quickly leave the laundry and head to the stairs, ripping the stupid plastic yellow tape the reads 'caution'. I take them two at a time, and I hear someone following me up, knowing it must be him.
"Kasey, babe, come on," I sense Matt reaching for me and I move my shoulder before he can grab it.
I turn to look at him from the top platform, glaring. "Just go,"
He doesn't listen to me, instead he follows me into my bedroom. I feel the tears I've been trying hard to keep in begin to fall over the brim of my eyes.
"Kasey it's not what it fucking looked like!" He repeats himself, moving towards me. "Don't you bloody get it?"
"Matthew," I snap. "I'm serious! Get the hell out of my god damn room,"
"That kiss seriously meant nothing!" He says, ignoring my pleas for him to leave. He steps closer to me and latches onto my arm, his face set in a hard glare. "She's a pathetic slut!"
I manage to get his hand off of me and I push into him with all of my strength. He stumbles backwards and I stare at him in disgust. "And so are you,"
"Don't start name calling, especially with me, it's pathetic," He grunts, slapping me hard across the face.
My mouth falls open in shock and I cup the left side of my face. I bite my lip to stop myself from screaming out in pain. "Get the fuck out," I finally say, although it pains my cheek and my jaw.
"No!" He growls, pushing me down onto the bed. "When you accept that I was fucking drunk and didn't realize what I was doing, I'll leave!"
"You are still drunk!" I scream in his face, the pain in my face completely forgotten as my anger and hurt take over me. "But that doesn't excuse any of your behavior tonight, Matthew!"
I go to sit up in but he pushes me back down, crawling on top of me. He leans down, his face so close to mine.
"What the hell do you think you are doing?" I ask through clenched teeth, my breathing heavy from his weight and from the adrenaline running through me.
He leans down suddenly and pushes his lips to mine, shoving his tongue down my throat. I resist kissing him back, nearly dry reaching knowing that his lips were just on Brooke's.
"No," I try to say through the kiss. I push at his shoulders and he pulls away for a second. I glare at him. "Get the fuck off me,"
He doesn't say anything before he slams his lips back down on mine again, roughly devouring my mouth. It hurts me more than it could ever give me pleasure, and waves of disgust wash over me.
His kiss is rough and hungry and unwanted, but he doesn't relent as his hands begin to roam down the sides of my body, touching and grabbing at my assets. I feel vomit rise in my mouth.
I don't give up my struggle, I continue to push against him and claw at any part of him I can reach. He doesn't seem to care, he just keeps kissing and touching me as if my struggling doesn't bother him at all.
I stop moving and just lie there, deciding that my fight back is effortless. Instead I don't respond to him. I don't close my mouth, but I don't kiss him back either. I have no reaction. I close my eyes and pretend it's not happening. I just lie there.
Finally he stops kissing me and I'm able to suck in a big breath of air. As soon as I've regained my breath I begin to scream loudly, my voice high pitched and terrifying. And then he grabs a pair of socks from my bedside table's draw and shoves them into my open mouth, grabbing both of my hands.
"I'm guessing you're a fucking prude virgin," He grunts, his weight now seeming so much heavier. "But don't fight me, Kasey, because it will only make this hurt so much more,"
He repositions himself so he's holding both of my hands in his left hand, and then with his right hand begins to rip at my dress, trying to pull it down. He succeeds, and then throws it on the floor behind him. He proceeds to take off my bra.
"I've always appreciated your body," He whispers, his voice hoarse as he stares down at my body.
A noise of disgust forms in the back of my throat as he starts tracing his finger along the line of my gstring.
"Mm," He says as he grins, beginning to take off his own clothes. "I'm gonna have fun tonight,"
I've always pictured my first time being somewhat a little more special.
When he starts to grope my body again new tears begin to fall from my eyes. He touches me where I've never been touched before. But before he can take us any more further, suddenly his whole body weight is removed from me.
I freeze for a moment, not sure what is happening. But after a few seconds I quickly sit up, my eyes roaming my dark bedroom before they're met with Caleb's concerned eyes. And then he looks away from me.
I follow his gaze down to the floor to see an already unconscious Matt. A small gasp escapes me and Caleb takes this as a sign to get Matthew out of my sight. Caleb picks him up and throws him over his shoulder before dropping him back down just outside my room. He begins to kick him in his stomach.
I shake my head slowly, not really processing the whole situation properly in my head.
"Caleb!" I suddenly yell loudly. My body begins to shake when I see that blood is seeping out of Matthew's nose and mouth. "Caleb, stop!"
Caleb stops mid kick, looking towards me. His face softens slightly before his eyes drift down to my chest. His gaze hardens again as he looks back down at Matthew, deciding to follow his kick through. I cringe, my body shaking even harder.
"Alright, I'm done," Cal says quickly, coming back into my room. He slams the door shut, blocking my view of Matthew and I can't be more relieved to not have to see him. I look at Caleb, my eyes wide. I've never seen Caleb hurt anybody. He frowns slightly, his eyes wide and innocent. "He deserves worse,"
When I don't say anything he walks over to me and grabs me into a tight hug. I wrap my arms around him and sob, letting all of my worries and fears come out now that it's over and Matt didn't get what he set out to. And I feel safe in Caleb's arms.
"Sh," He says, whispering nothings into my ear as he leads me over to my bed. He sits me down before pulling away and going into my wardrobe. He returns a few moments later with one of my nighties. "Stand up, Kasey,"
I don't move, I can't move, and so Caleb stands me up before shoving the nightie over my head and pulling it down. His hand brushes against the sensitive skin on my chest, reminding me that my boobs are completely bare and in sight to him. I sob again, my nose full of snot, and I bet I don't look attractive now, even half naked.
When he finally has the nightie on me and sees that it's short and skimpy, he frowns and grabs them hem, planning to take it off of me.
"No, Caleb, stop!" I swat his hand away, shaking my head. "Please, just stop, it doesn't matter,"
He looks away from my body pointedly before sighing. He leans down and pulls my be covers back, motioning for me to crawl in. I follow his command and snuggle into my bed with wet cheeks and a shivering body.
"I'm so sorry," He says gently, his eyes guilty. "I wish I'd come looking up here earlier. I'll see you in the morning, okay?"
He bends down and kisses my still throbbing cheek, his lips gentle against my tender skin. When he turns away from me I reach out quickly and grab onto his arm, making him stumble back a little. He turns to look at me, his eyebrows lifted.
"Um, Caleb," I bite my lip, closing my eyes. "Would you stay with me if I asked you to?"
He doesn't reply, but I hear him make his way around to the opposite side of my bed. I hear him kick off his shoes and then feel him as he lifts the blankets, climbing in beside me. "Of course, Kasey,"
"Thank you," I turn to lie on my side so that I'm facing him, and I reach my hand out to rest my palm against his cheek. His eyes search mine slowly. "Thank you for everything,"
He leans forward slightly, so that his lips are nearly touching mine but aren't quite. "You're welcome, princess," His eyes don't stray from mine and he forces a small smile. "Go to sleep now,"
And as though I'm at his command, I close my eyes and allow myself to melt into Caleb's embrace as I slowly drift off to sleep.