I just spent 20 minutes googling around to research grocery stores in Encinitas.
I'm also trying to get my word count back up so hold tight.
"Alright, see you in about an hour," Mark said as Jonas and I headed out the door.
"You're sure this is everything we need," I asked as I looked down at the list.
"Positive. But if you're willing to throw chocolate and strawberry syrup on there, I wouldn't be upset."
"Will do," I said as I buckled Jonas up in the back seat.
"Oh! And cupcakes," Mark shouted out the door.
"We'll see," I said as I closed the car door.
I smiled at him and we blew me a kiss before closing the front door. I headed out of the driveway and headed out to the back seat. I put on Songs To Learn and Sing by Echo and the Bunnymen. Jonas liked it a lot and as soon as he heard the intro to 'Rescue' he started dancing and babbling happily.
We pulled into the Von's parking lot and I got Jonas out of the back seat. I carried him up to where the carts were outside. I sat him in the front and headed inside the store. Jonas was still happy, making goofy faces and giggling the whole time. I threw what we needed in the back of the cart and made my way through the store.
"Tom," I heard a female voice call out.
I looked around, not spotting anyone, but then I heard the same voice call out. "Tom." This time it was much closer.
I looked behind me and there she stood. The same blue-green eyes as Jonas and the long, brown hair.
"Jennifer."
"Can we talk," she said, keeping her voice low.
"I don't know if that's the best idea, Jen," I said.
She looked over to Jonas, "Who's this little guy?"
"My son," I said.
She shook her head as if she was trying to get the thoughts out. "Just meet me at the Wendy's a block down. It'll be brief. I just want to talk to you," she said.
It couldn't be that bad. I have a gorgeous husband and three amazing kids to come home to. I have a house and an album in the works. This simple fucking meeting could not tear all of that away no matter how bad it gets.
I finished my shopping and checked out. I pushed the cart outside and got Jonas settled in before putting everything in the trunk of the SUV. I turned the car on and turned down the radio. I pulled my phone out of my back pocket and let out a deep sigh. I dialed Mark's number and he picked up quickly.
"Hey, babe, I literally just took my phone out to call you. What's up," he asked.
"It's nothing, just wanted to tell you that I'm taking Jonas to lunch real quick and I'll be home soon. What are you up to?"
"Alright. I'm taking the kiddos to the beach for a while. Come and meet us up there when after you're all done there."
"Awesome. Can't wait. I'll talk to you soon, love."
"Love you. Bye," he said before hanging up.
"Alright, Rocket . Let's head out," I said and he giggled back.
I turned the radio back up for him and headed out of the parking lot and made the short drive to the Wendy's a few blocks down. I got Jonas out of the car and carried him through the small parking lot, setting him down once we got inside. I got him a kids meal and myself a lemonade. I saw the back of Jen's head in the back corner of the place. We got our food and headed over to where she sat.
"Alright. Can we please make this quick, I've got milk in the car," I said sternly.
"Yes, just sit," she said with a glare.
I sat down, Jonas on my lap. He went through his food and ate as Jen and I began to talk.
"What is this even about, Jennifer? I thought this shit would be over after everything went down."
"You don't have the right to talk to me that way, Tom. You were the reason our marriage failed, you were the reason I left everything. I can't believe you think you can talk that way to me."
"I'm done, Jen," I said, a harsh scowl on my face, "I'm married, I have kids and a career and a house. None of which involves you but God forbid I'm happy. I'm not fucking proud of what I've done Jen. But I'm fucking happy now. Our marriage was a mistake, Jen. It was done out of spite and I regret it. I'm done with this part of my life, Jen. I know why you left. I'm an egotistical douche bag that thinks he fucking God. I'm done, Jen. I'm fucking done. This can't be a legal battle because everything I signed two years ago was based on your terms. I can't be associated with you Jen. Don't take it too personally because this entire thing is because of me. I am the one at fault here and I will not deny it. Please. I can't do this. It's nothing against you. I have a life now, and there's just no room for you to be involved."
She opened her mouth to speak but I cut her off, "Don't. Now if you'll excuse me, I've gotta get home."
"Tom, I just wanted to see if we could talk every once in while, if we could be friends."
"I can't do that, Jen. I'm sorry. But thanks in the long run because I wouldn't have the lift I have now if you hadn't left me there that day."
"God, you're an asshole," she said as she shook her head.
"You're right. Now I really gotta go. See you when I'm dead," I said, dismissing her as I took Jonas from the table.
I threw Jonas's scraps in the trash and grabbed my lemonade, heading out of the car and buckling the little one in.
"I'm sorry about that, buddy," I said, "Let's go see Daddy at the beach."
I drove home and quickly put all the groceries away. Thankfully the milk was okay. I took Jonas upstairs and got him set up in his swimsuit. I changed as well. I slipped on sandals and put Jonas in his water shoes. We made the 5 minute drive to our usual beach spot and parked next to Mark's car. I took him out of the car and he ran over when he saw Mark and the other kids.
"Hey babe." Mark greeted me with a quick kiss on the cheek. "How was lunch?"
"Jonas got a kids meal and I just got a drink," I said, keeping my mind off of the conversation with Jen.
"You alright," he asked, a concerned look on his face.
"I'll talk about it later," I said, giving him a sad smile, "Just enjoy the beach for now."
I gave him a quick kiss on the side of his mouth and his frown quickly turned back to a smile.
"C'mon. We've got an open ocean in front of us and we're just standing here," I smiled.
"You sure know how to make the world seem magical," he said with a smile.
"Then let's keep living our real-life fairy tale."
-----------------------
"So what happened earlier today," Mark said as I made my way down the long set of stairs.
"Hmm," I said looking up, "Oh, right."
Mark stood in the kitchen, bare back leaning against the counter as he sipped his water. I went up next to him, grabbing my pill case from the top of the microwave and taking out the ones I needed for the time being. Mark handed me his water as I threw the pills down my pipes, I took a gulp from water, shaking my head to get the bitter taste out of my mouth.
"What was it, hun," he asked with a concerned look on his face.
I looked at him with a sigh, "Jennifer. She was at the market."
His eyes widened but he quickly tried to get them back to the way they were before.
"What went on?"
"She wanted to 'talk'. Wanted to be friends again and I booked it. I can't be around her after. No. I don't wanna go into back then," I said, stumbling over my words as my mind moved a thousand times faster than my mouth could. I shook my head, clenching my fists to keep my hands from shaking as my breathing got short and quick.
Mark quickly came over, taking my hands and squeezing them tightly, urging me to breath and calm down. I sank down to the kitchen floor, hugging my knees to my chest and keeping the tears from leaving my eyes. Mark pushed my bottom limbs away as I resisted. He straddled my legs and forced his arms around me. Stabilizing me in a cage of his strong arms. I felt it all come crashing as I gave into the horrible emotion. My head fell on his shoulders and tears left my eyes along with horrible pained sobs that I had been holding back for what felt like an eternity.
"I don't like back then, Mark," I said as the panic slowly ceased, "It was so dark. So. Fucking. Dark."
"I know, baby, I know," he whispered into the top of my head, "I'm right here darling, just focus on me, okay?"
I nodded into his shoulder as my eyes began to dry and my breathing steadied. He rocked us slightly, side to side as his hands pulled me into him, keeping me as close as possible.
"I shouldn't have to put you through this, the countless outbreaks and anxiety attacks. I wish I wasn't like this, Mark. And I'm so fucking sorry,"
"Don't be," he said with a little smile. "Tommy, you've gotten so much better these past few months and I'm so proud of you."
He took a break and kissed my cheek, causing a small smile to appear on my face, his grin began to show.
"You've come so very far, Tom. I'm so proud of you. You've done so well these past few months. I see you getting better every single day. The episodes have been coming out less and less often, this is the first time in almost a month. I love you, and I'm so very, very proud of you."
He leaned down and kissed my lips, the physical connection almost as strong as the emotional. My arms went over his shoulders, folding behind his head and he held my waist close. His bare chest brushed against mine.
I slid down the cabinet doors and soon I was flat on my back. Mark pulled off, laying next to me. I fold my arms behind my head as Mark lays down, using my chest as a pillow.
"What are we doing," I chuckled, "Laying down on the kitchen floor like we did when we were younger."
"Yeah, it is a bit goofy. I remember playing with Josie on the floor. Soon after you moved in. I miss those days."
"I miss having a dog around. I miss Josie. She was such a good dog," I said, my voice getting progressively quieter.
"Me too. I've been wanting one around here for a while."
"Hey Marky," I asked with a smile.
"Yes, Tom," he said looking up at me.
"Can we get a dog?"
"Yes," he said with a chuckle.
"Yay," I exclaimed.
Mark rolled onto his side so he was facing me, we still lay on the cold kitchen tiles. I reached my hand down, putting my hands through the short strands. His eyes closed slowly.
"Marky, let's go to bed, babe," I whispered.
He shook his head, not wanting to move. I sat up, getting him off of me carefully before I stood. I bent down, supporting him under his arms and knees and picking him up. His slung his arms around my neck loosely as I carried him upstairs to our room. I opened up the door and set him on towards the middle of the bed before climbing under the blankets myself. Mark cuddled up to me, his head on my side and his limbs wrapped tightly around me. I kissed his forehead lightly before I let myself slip out.
----------
I went upstairs from the kitchen, Mark was in the bathroom that attached to our bedroom. He came out in a black the Cure shirt and Dickies cargos. He tossed me a set of clothes and threw shoes at the bed.
"Wear those," he stated.
I took the clothes from my hands. It was a white Descendants shirt and black Dickies. The memories from about 16 years ago came back. That's what I wore the first day I met him, and that's what he wore, too.
I stripped off my clothes and slipped into the ones he gave me. I looked at the shoes on the bed and sure enough they were white, checkered Vans. I sat on the bed and slipped the Vans over my baseball socks. I felt like I was a kid again, and it felt amazing.
"Looking sharp," Mark said with a smile.
"You're such a sap for shitty romance aren't you," I teased.
"Always have been, always will be."
I walked over to him, planting a kiss on his lips. He wrapped his arms around my shoulders and I put mine around his waist.
"You look as good as the day I met you," I smiled down at him.
"And you look even better."
Mark lead us downstairs to where Anne was playing with the kids. Ava and Jack were coloring at the coffee table and Jonas lay half asleep with Anne. I went over to where the kids were coloring.
"I'll see you beautiful babes in the morning," I said to both of them, kissing their foreheads and ruffling Jack's hair.
Mark came over and they both gave him half-hugs. I went over to Jonas pushing his long hair out of his face.
"Thanks again, Anne," I said quietly.
"Of course. Your kids are lovely," she said with a smile.
"Thank you," I smiled back.
Mark came up behind me, wrapping his arm around mine. I stood up from my slouching position.
"We'll see you guys in a little bit. Anne, feel free to raid the cupboards. Kids," he said toward Jack and Ava. They looked up, "You know the rules. Don't be jerks to Anne, I'm the only one allowed to do that."
The kids both laughed.
"Bye Dad! Bye Daddy," they both called out.
"Have fun. Not too much fun," Anne said with a smirk.
Mark flipped her off with a chuckle before we headed out the door.
Mark opened my door for me as we went to the truck. Some habits never seemed to change since back then.
He scurried back over to the driver side of the truck and hopped in. He started the vehicle and pulled out of the long driveway and headed towards the place I knew we were going to go. He reached up to the CD carrier on the visor and put in the Screeching Weasel CD.
We arrived at Sombrero pretty quickly. We didn't live far away.
We headed into the small building. It looked the same as it did back then. We ordered the usual, the workers still knowing us by name.
"Just like old times," I smiled up at him as we sat in the back booth.
"The first night I met you. 10'o'clock we went here," he said with a grand smile. He reached into his deep pockets. "I got these for us."
He set long boxes on the table. I opened one of them carefully.
There sat little bracelets. They were thick black and dark green paracord bracelets. In the center there was a silver circle with a rocket engraved into it. I flipped it over and there was something else engraved on the back.
"To the stars," Mark said with a smile, opening the box that held the same contents.
A smile came over my face that wouldn't seem to leave.
"I know it's a bit lame but it's all true. To the stars and back, babe," he said quietly.
I took his hand and buckled the bracelet around his wrist.
"I love you so much," I whispered.
He smiled and squeezed my hand, buckling the second around my wrist.
"You're so amazing," I gushed.
"You've made my world a better place. I'd do anything for you, Tommy."
I shook my head, "How did I end up with someone as great as you?"
"By being yourself."
We finished our food and said goodbye to the workers. We headed out to the truck, Mark starting our usual routine.
We drove out to the same field nearby. I held his hand between our seats. He had a small contagious smile on his face. The field was closeby.
He put the SW CD back in the carrier and pulled out the old CD. Three Imaginary Boys played over the speakers.
"Come on," he said as he hopped out.
He pulled something out of the back seats. I didn't see what it was until he jumped onto the flatbed. He spread blankets over the hard metal and threw pillow towards the head.
I followed him up. He kicked off his shoes and I did too, climbing up the flat bed and resting on the pillows. The speakers were loud enough to hear outside of the car and nobody came near this old field. I lay next to him as we look up at the night sky. No street lights were around hear and the moon shined bright.
We spent the rest of the night looking up at the sky. Not saying much but enjoying the company and presence of one another. It was peaceful. And just what I needed after yesterday afternoon.