Nervously standing outside of my house, I see Gregory come out his front door and turn around; then wave to me as he sees me. I wave back and watch as he jogs over to me.
"Hey beautiful." He kisses my lips lightly and hugs me, then holds my hands while looking down at me.
"Hi." I smile up at him, forcing the corners of my mouth to move up even higher to fake the smile.
"What did you want to talk about?"
"Want to walk with me?" I avoid his question and he looks at me for a second before smiling with a nod and leading us down the sidewalk and down the street.
As we walk, I hold his hand tightly and remind myself to take deep breathes.
"What grade did you get on that essay?" He randomly brings up.
"An A. You?" I look over at him and he shakes his head.
"D, and I thought I did good on it."
I laugh and shake my head, "English papers have never been your strong suit." I tease.
"Hey! at least I'm good with math or you would have failed last semester." He laughs and so do I. He really has be there for me in times that I need him, I could always count on him.
We walk a little more in silence and my chest tightens.
"Gregory," But before I can finish, he interrupts me.
"You remember when I asked you to sweethearts last year?"
I look at him and he is staring off down the street, "yeah?"
"I remember you walking to the end of the drive way in that deep purple dress, your hair in loose curls and your cheeks flushed as I stared at you with my mouth wide open." He laughs a little and then squeezes my hand slightly, "I really want to feel like that again."
"Feel like what?" I ask, looking down at the pavement.
"Like the luckiest guy in the world to get to be the one at your side." His voice takes on a serious tone now, "Do you think that I'll get to see you in a white dress walking towards me like that?" He slows our pace and my heart starts to beat into over drive.
"Gregory..."
"Not now, but maybe when we have at least a year of college down." He adds quickly.
"Gregory," I stop us from walking just in time for us to get to an old favorite spot of ours, the first spot where he kissed me. I didn't even realize we where going in this direction until now. "We still have things we need to talk about."
"Ok, go on." He smiles down at me and moves some hair away from my face. His warm fingers grazing my cheek.
"What would happen if the person you are faded to, isn't me?"
He looks at me for a minute, "Well I don't know, I guess I haven't given it much thought since I can only see myself with you."
"Answer honestly." I shake my head at his round about answer.
"I would have to see what she is like, but most likely ignore the bond and mark, to be with you."
"But if you did that you would be leaving her without the person who is meant to be hers, you would break her heart and she would most likely be a lone for the rest of her life." I look into his eyes and can see the flicker of an emotion in his eyes as my words register with him.
Gregory's eyes sadden and he looks at me blankly, "I would, but I love you."
"Gregory, what if we are just hurting each other by being together? You know that I am not your faded person."
"How do you know that?" He asks, obviously getting panicked. "What is this about Riley?" He squeezes my hands tighter.
"You will meet your faded person and she will love you so much Gregory, I know she will. She will be the best thing to ever happen to you."
"What?! You are the best thing that has ever happened to me Riley, what in the world are you going on about?!" He lets go of my hands and looks at me with betrayal.
Tears sting my eyes and I try to hold them in, "Gregory..."
"You got your mark didn't you!?" I stand there looking at him in silence, hoping he sees that I don't want to hurt him, "You did...." He trails off and looks at me as if I am the most painful memory he has.
"I wanted this. Us. I really did, but it is a completely different feeling when you find that person Gregory! I tried to forget that person, but no matter how hard I tried, it didn't work." I say on the verge of tears.
"I can't believe this! I love you Riley and you hide this from me!" He yells at me and grabs my shoulders, "Who the heck is it?!"
"I won't tell you." I sob, and wince as his hands tighten on my arms.
"Tell me!" He screams at me and I shake my head.
"I can't tell you!" I yell back and thrash out of his hold, my hands going up to rub my bruising arms.
He looks at me disgusted, "How could you do this to us?" His voice filled with venom.
"How is this my fault?! We don't get to choose who we are faded to."
"Well, I hope who ever I am faded to is so much better than you!" He yells at me with tears building in his eyes. My heart cracks and I take in a ragged breathe.
"Gregory," I sob, "I never meant to hurt you. That is the last thing I ever wanted to do."
"Oh really!?" He laughs bitterly and tears fall down his face, "Well, you better believe I hope you get hurt, I hope that you get F****ing broken by whoever you end up with next." He throws his hands in the air and walks away.
I clutch my chest and try to breath as his silhouette disappears back down the sidewalk. Sinking to the ground, I cry the hardest I have ever cried before; letting out all of it. All the memories of us together, letting out how well he treated me, how good of a boyfriend he was, letting out the harsh words he said tonight.
I can't hold on to him anymore, he wasn't really mine to begin with.