Sorry for any typos
Daniella
The walk from the dorms to Raquel's apartment was full of me getting weird looks from people and my face burning like hell. Giovanni's bitch ass just had to leave me.
When I finally made it to the apartments, I was expecting to see Giovanni's truck parked in the parking lot, but he must have dropped my stuff off and left. Good for him because I was planning on kicking him so hard that his balls swallowed his dick . I was going to kick the fuck out of him. Literally. He wouldn't be fucking anyone with a belly button dick.
I walked up to Raquel's door and turned the door knob, but it was locked. That bitch said she would leave it unlocked for me, but I guess she's still mad. Well shit. Now I'm mad too. We can be mad together.
"Open the fucking door Raquel!" I said banging on the door like a mad woman.
A few seconds later the door swung open and Raquel looked pissed off. Oops.
"Why the hell are you ban- Daaaammmnnn!" The girl said stopping mid sentence and touching the side of my face.
"Let me guess, you hit on the wrong girl. I told you that mouth was going to get you fucked up one day."
"That's not even what happened." I said pushing Raquel aside and heading to the bathroom so I could examine my face.
"Oh don't push me. You should have pushed the person that slapped you." The girl called after me, but I ignored her.
"Fucking shit! She left a hand print." I said frowning at the swelling evidence of what Mya had done to me. She better be glad I love her. Well I think I love her. Hell, I don't know. If she's going to be abusive, I don't think can put myself in a situation like that anyway. Just kidding.
"If that's not what happened, what did happened?" Raquel asked still thinking this was funny.
"Do you have any ice packs?" I asked ignoring the girl's question.
"Freezer." The girl answered following me into the kitchen area. I say "kitchen area" because the only thing separating the kitchen from the other rooms is a counter and then it's the living room.
"Why are you following me? You trying to get fucked or something?" I asked wincing at how cold the ice pack was and the pain that it caused my swelling cheek.
"You trying to get slapped or something?" The girl asked putting a hand on her hip.
"Sorry mama, somebody already beat you to it." I said making the girl laugh.
What's so funny about this? I was assaulted! In my own home! By a girl that claims to be in love with me! I don't feel safe on this campus with Mya's violent ass running around. Haha I'm kidding. I deserved to get my ass slapped in the face if I'm being honest. It was only a matter of time.
"It's about time someone slapped your little ass. What did you do?" The girl asked and I decided I might as well tell her.
"I was fucking your mom and your dad caught us." I said making Raquel's mouth drop open.
"You little bitch. I should fuck you up, but I'm gonna let it slide since someone already got to you." The girl said laughing.
Thank the Lordt she didn't get offended. Not everyone can handle my sense of humor and lack of chill. You see why I like her so much?
"But seriously,what happened?" The girl asked and I sighed before speaking.
"I told a girl that I loved her and she slapped me." I said with a shrug.
"There has to be more to it than that." The girl said looking like she didn't believe me.
"It was my roommate. She's in love with me. And at first I didn't think I felt the same, but now I'm not so sure." I said and Raquel scoffed.
"You're not in love with her. The only person you're in love with is yourself." The girl said laughing like me being in love with someone was the funniest and most ridiculous thing in the world.
"You don't understand. We have history." I said and the girl just kept laughing. It was sort of hurting my feelings. Like damn. Is it really that funny?
"History of what? Her wanting more from you, but you giving yourself to other girls instead of the one that actually loves you? I'm sorry, but you're a little...out there. If you were in love with her, you wouldn't be standing here right now.
"Where would I be?"
"Back at that dorm proving to her that you meant what you said." The girl said like it was the simplest thing ever.
"She doesn't believe me or trust me, so what can I possibly do to prove it to her?" I asked the girl.
"You're a doer, so don't do anything. Just say it." The girl said and I was hella confused at this point.
"But actions speak louder than words." I said and the girl shook her head.
"Not for your type. You already speak through actions, but that's not always enough. You have to learn how to express yourself with words. Instead of bottling your feelings up, try talking about them. It helps."
"Stop acting like you know me. I'm not that easy to read." I said getting a little agitated. I hated when people tried to tell me about myself.
"I don't have to read you. I was you. So I know how you think and how you choose not to feel. I know how you've gotten so great at hiding your emotions to the point that you can't even tell you're feeling them. That's what it takes to be a player. You can't feel. It's against the rules. But you broke your rules for this girl didn't you?" The girl asked and I didn't answer so she continued.
"Then you dropped her when you felt yourself falling. When you started thinking about her too much and wanting her around all the time. You started turning down girls left and right because they didn't excite you anymore. Not like she did. Then you let her think that you were still fooling around with other girls when lord knows you weren't."
That's when I had to cut her off. She knew too much. Like what the fuck? Was she there?
I really did try to fool around with other girls while Mya and I had what ever we had, but I just couldn't bring myself to. So I just ignored her some days and she would just assume that I was fucking some other girl when all I was really doing was thinking about her. That's why we argued so much.
"I'm going for a walk." I said walking past the girl and leaving the apartment.
I needed to talk to someone but I didn't really have any friends to call because I never formed friendships. In high school, I was either fucking or hooping. There was really no in between. I don't even know how I got sleep, or made good grades.
There was only one person I could talk to at the moment.
"Hey baby girl." My mother said answering the phone on the first ring.
"You don't know how great it makes me feel to hear your voice." I said low key wanting to cry. I love my mother so fucking much.
"Aw, that's sweet. How much money do you need?" My mother asked making me laugh.
"I don't need money. I just want to talk. I need to talk." I told my mother.
"I'm just playing with you Daniella. What's going on? I know classes haven't started yet, so this must be about a girl."
No one knows me better than my mother. She knows me better than I know myself. I could talk to her about anything, so she pretty much knew everything about me. She knew about how much of a "player" I was and even though she didn't like it, she never judged me for it.
"Do you remember Mya?" I asked.
"You mean Malika's daughter? Your "not" girlfriend." The woman said making me roll my eyes.
"She wasn't my girlfriend Ma."
"I know sweetheart. That's why I said "not"." The woman said and I sighed.
"I know you're making air quotes when you say "not"."
"Well you were sweet on her. What do you expect me to think?" The woman said chuckling. "But anyway, what about her? I thought you two bro- stopped talking."
"I heard that." I said laughing at my mother's slip up. "Anyway, she's my roommate."
"Oh lord. Be good Daniella." My mother said making laugh.
"It's not like that. She sort of hates me now." I said with a sigh. "Not only that but she slapped the dog shit out of me today." I said clamping my hand over my mouth when I realized I cursed while speaking to my mother.
"Daniella Skye Fuller, watch your mouth before I drive forty-one hours just to clean it out with soap. I'm not one of your little friends." My mother scolded me.
"I'm sorry Ma. It slipped."
"I'm gonna slip to California and beat your ass if you let it happen again." The woman said making me roll my eyes. I mean, I know she would actually do it, but how can she expect me not to curse when she does it?
"Yes ma'am."
"Now tell me what you did to Mya to make her slap you." My mother said and I felt so betrayed.
"Why do you assume I did something to her?" I asked.
"Because Mya is the sweetest girl I've ever met. And I know you had to do something to make her put her hands on you. You are my daughter after all." The woman said and I couldn't argue with that. "So what did you do?"
"I told her I love her." I admitted. My mom already knew how I felt about Mya, so I'm expecting a different reaction from her than what I got from Raquel.
"It took you long enough." The woman said and I just rolled my eyes.
"Did you forget about the part where she slapped me? She didn't even believe me." I said with a sigh. "I don't even know if I believe myself. I mean, I know I feel something for her, but how can it be love when it was so easy for me to just drop her like that? I hurt her without giving it a second thought."
"You're like a robot sometimes. It's like all you have to do is program yourself not to feel and you won't. I don't understand how a person that can control their emotions so well can't even understand them. Do yourself, that girl, and any other girl you may get involved with if things don't work out with Mya a favor and instead of pushing foreign feelings away, try to understand them. I know you like to have your fun, but you're becoming a woman and after a while, pointless sex is going to get old and you're going to start craving actual connections with people on a level that's more than just physical. Try being with someone for more than five seconds and get to know them. Fall in love. Maybe it's time you put the whole player image behind you." My mother said and I knew she was right, but I didn't know if I was capable of doing what she was telling me to.
"I'm not wired that way Ma." I said lamely.
"I know you'll figure everything out Daniella. Just please don't get your heart broken trying to pretend you don't have one. I know you're capable of loving someone. You love me." My mother said making me laugh.
"That's different. You're my mom and you're the best person I know, of course I'm going to love you. And I know you'll never leave me despite the mistakes I make."
"Is that what you're scared of? Not being good enough for someone?" My mother asked, but I stayed silent.
"Sweetheart? You still there?"
"I'm still here. You just got me thinking. I know I'm no good Ma. I hop from girl to girl and I'm content with that. What if I get in a relationship and I can't stop? I'm not trying to be a cheater, but I don't think I can be in a relationship without stepping out of it. The hoe in me just takes over sometimes." I said laughing at myself.
"Well you better tell the hoe inside of you to sit her fast ass down." My mother said and now I was laughing at her.
"But on a serious note, one of Mya's old friends is trying to reconnect with her, but I think the girl wants something more. What if she chooses her over me? What if I put myself out there and she rejects me?"
"Then you take that L like a woman and focus on something else." The woman making me laugh.
"I can't do that. I'm not just going to let someone take her away from me like that."
"She's not yours for someone to take away Daniella. She's a human being, not an object. And I wouldn't blame her for choosing someone over you after you just kicked her to the curb like that."
"Whose side are you on?" I asked my mother.
"Yours, and that's why I'm not just about to tell you what you want to hear. You don't deserve that girl Dani. She should be with someone that isn't going to leave her when they get scared of their feelings. That girl was crazy about you Daniella. She was over our house so much that I just started making her a place at the dinner table whether you told me she was coming over or not because it just seemed normal for her to be there. All I had to do was see the way she looked at you and I knew she was in love with you."
"This is just making me feel worse. What if it's too late to try?" I asked.
"When did this happen?" My mom asked referring to the whole me getting the black slapped off of me thing.
"This morning."
"You got slapped for breakfast!" My mom said laughing loudly into the phone and making my ear ring.
"Some mother you are. Laughing at your own daughter's pain." I said playing hurt.
"Oh hush. It's about time one of these girls slapped you." My mother said sounding like Raquel.
"Yeah, but what should I do about her Ma?"
"Just give her some time to cool off and your face some time to heal. And then try talking to her." My mother said just having to throw something about my face in there.
"You're so funny mommy." I said sarcastically.
"I know. But yes, just give her some space and then try talking to her. I'm not sure how great that's going to go since you're roommates, but I'm sure you'll figure it out."
"Yeah, I'm sure I'll, figure something out. Thank you." I said deciding not to tell my mother about me moving out of my dorm room. She didn't need to know everything that was going on.
"You're welcome baby girl. Call me and tell me how it goes."
"I will. I love you Ma."
"I love you too Daniella."
After I got off the phone with my mother, I walked to the dorms, but only to see Nadia. I was little mad at her because she's been acting like Mya's fucking therapist. She's the reason Mya's been dissing me lately. Despite me being a little mad at her, she was still my homegirl, so I had to go see her.
I walked into the lobby and I was happy to see that the elevator was coming down. If not, I would have just taken the stairs.
When the elevator dinged and the doors open, my heart dropped. I'm so done with elevators.
"You're the girl that hates Chipotle." The other Mya said when she spotted me. She was smiling like we were friends or some shit.
"And you're the girl that works there." I said with zero emotion.
"Oh, you must have an attitude again." The girl said getting bitchy like she did the other day in Chipotle.
"Stay away from Mya." I said knowing I had no right to, but the words just came out.
"Excuse me? The last time I checked Mya was an adult that could speak for herself and according to her, she wants to see me again." The girl said making my blood boil.
"You're wasting your time."
"How am I wasting my time? I'm just trying to catch up with an old friend." The girl said with a smirk. The fuck is she smirking for?
"No, you're trying to get with my girl and you need to back the fuck up." I said and the girl laughed like I had just told the funniest joke ever.
"Mya isn't your girl. She hates you remember?" The girl asked and I put my hands in my pockets to keep from punching her. I was not about to get my non-fighting ass beat.
"She isn't now, but she will be. And then you'll just be another object of her past."
"You mean like you are now?" The girl clapped back and I felt that one.
"I may be her past, but I'm also her present and future, so take your ass back to Chipotle you bean head ass bitch."
"You're too immature for her." The girl said laughing. "But I'll let you keep thinking you have a chance with her."
After that the girl walked away and as bad as I wanted to take a chance by punching her in the face, I held back.
I'm a fucker, not a fighter.
(Author's Note)
Yeah, so I changed my mind about the time jump. It's coming though. Haha.
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