Sarah pulled into the small parking lot beside the hardware store just as Pete walked out the door.
He spotted her car and walked over, leaning in her window. "Hey, how are ya doing?" He smiled happily to see her.
Sarah returned the smile, looking closely at his face. He looked happy to see her, but she saw the lack of sleep, hidden in his grey eyes, and the dark smudges under them.
"What's the plan for tonight?" She asked brightly.
Pete shrugged and stood up, checking the sky. "I don't know, I don't think we should go out on the lake, I heard it might rain tonight. It looks like it's clouding up. Do you want to go to a movie? I'm buying."
"Yeah!" Sarah nodded enthusiastically, "The Kris Kristofferson one. Please," She leaned out the window and put on her best fake pout. "Please, Petey, take me to see my Kris."
Sarah was madly in love with Kris Kristofferson, she practically swooned when she saw him or even heard his scruffy voice.
Pete squinted at her and did his Kris Kristofferson impression. "You look really foxy when you do that, baby, and I was going to take you to see him," He paused and cocked his eyebrow up. "Until you called me by that fucked up name."
Petey was the name his mother used to call him when he was little, and he always hated it. Sarah loved to tease him with it.
Sarah winked at him, playfully. "Please, Pete," she emphasized. "Please take me to see Kris."
Pete sighed, over dramatically, "Ok, I guess. Meet me back at the house. God, the sacrifices I make for you......"
Sarah giggled as she watched him in her rearview mirror.
The main street past the square was the one Sarah and Pete lived on. The old homes lining the street were mostly Victorians, the original structures from the beginning days of the city. The ones on the left had back lawns that sloped to the lake, separated by a natural stone wall that dropped down 12 ft. to the rocky shore.
This was the direction Sarah and Pete turned, into side by side drives, divided by a small section of grass. Their homes were mirror images of each other, with wrap around front porches, the front doors had side lights on each side and an arched stained glass topped them.
Four tall windows graced the first floor, with matching windows for the rooms above them. At the opposite ends of each house was a rounded turret with circular windows, one for each floor.
The only difference between the two homes was the color of the gingerbread trim along the eaves; Pete's home was painted a dark blue and Sarah's, a bright red.
Sarah got out of the car and met Pete in the grass between the drives. "I should check in with my parents."
She didn't really have to, they knew she was at the campground. But since she was leaving the car here, she knew they expected her to pop in and say hello.
Pete nodded in agreement, "Stop over when you're ready."
Sarah heard the TV blaring the local news when she entered the foyer. She waved her hand as she passed the arched doorway of the living room and called out a hello to her father, then walked down the narrow hall to back of the house.
She followed the smell of baked chicken and found her mother standing at the sink, washing the dinner dishes.
"Hey Mom, I just stopped in to say hi, I'm bringing back your car."
"Sarah! I was just thinking about you." Her mother dried her hands and reached for the red pack of Pall Malls on the counter. "How is your weekend going?"
Sarah watched as her mother lit a cigarette. She had a sneaking suspicion that what her mom was really asking was how she and Pete were getting along. "Good, I'm just headed out to go to the movies."
Sarah's moms eyes lit up, as Sarah knew they would. "That's nice, will you be home tonight?"
"Nope." Sarah shook her head, "I'll be staying at the campground again." She paused, then went on, "We're going to the Agora in Cleveland tomorrow night. We'll probably be staying the night there. I'll be back Monday in time for work at noon."
Her mother listened to this, studying her daughter through the cigarette smoke. "Is Midgie going too?" She asked casually.
Sarah nodded, "Yeah, she's going with us." She avoided her mothers eyes, opening the refrigerator, and taking out a can of Pepsi.
She concentrated on the Bicentennial decoration as she pulled the pop top off and reached to throw it in the garbage can.
"So, is this a date with Pete tonight?"
Sarah rolled her eyes towards her mother. "If you want to call it that, you can."
She headed out the back door. "Catch ya later, mom!"
Sarah's mom crossed over to the yellow phone hanging in the niche in the wall. Picking up the receiver, she dialed a number.
"Guess what, Delly? Our kids are going on a date!", she gushed.
"I know! Pete just told me, Janie! Of course, he wouldn't exactly admit that it was a date." Pete's mom was just as excited.
"Oh course not! Sarah was the same way." The two of them agreed to meet on Janie's front porch as soon as their kids left.
Twenty minutes later, they were settled into the porch swing, ashtrays and cigarettes on the side tables and a beer bottle in their hands.
It was a tradition that had carried on since they were young. The two old friends had their best talks on the front porch swing.
Sarah and Pete found seats in the darkened movie theater and were watching the coming attractions.
Pete leaned over and whispered in Sarah's ear, "Are you all ready to see Kris on the big screen? Is he going to get you all hot?"
She started giggling. "You are such a dickhead. You're just jealous that he's hotter than you!"
The opening music started and they both were transfixed, watching the movie. When the love scene started, Sarah's eyes were glued to the screen.
Pete heard her sniffing as the end credits rolled over the screen. "It's just a movie, baby."
"I know, but did they have to cut him up like that? Those boys were fucked up!" Sarah whispered.
"C'mon," He helped her up, "Let's go grab a pizza and take it back to the tent."
As they waited for their pizza, they discussed the movie. "The love on Kris's face when he looked at her..." Sarah shivered. "It was so deep."
Pete nodded absently, "Yeah, he's a good actor."
"It looked so real. I bet he looks at Rita Coolidge that same way. I would love it if a guy looked at me like that." Sarah said dreamily.
"Hey, I do. Every time I look at you." Pete joked and crossed his hands over his heart.
"Shut up! You don't have a romantic bone in your body." She punched his arm, playfully.
Pete paid for the pizza, and they climbed in the car, headed for the campground. "I forgot to tell you. Dave said he and Midgie might stop down later." Pete said as they pulled into their campsite.
"Oh-h-h that's great! Scrabble Night!" Sarah said excitedly. "And you are not allowed to cheat!"
***
Sam pulled into the parking garage of the hotel about 7:30. He took his duffle out of the saddlebag, unhooked the straps holding his guitar, then shouldered them both and walked into the hotel lobby.
At the registration desk, he gave the name Celeste Carrettiere and said he only needed one key, then he added. "A girl will be coming in tomorrow afternoon, when she asks for me by that name, could you please give her the other key?"
After turning down the clerks offer for a bellhop, he walked into the elevator and pressed the button for his floor.
He was tired from staying up all night, writing. A hot shower and some food sounded good, but he had to see Georgie first.
Trish answered his knock, opening the door wider and giving him a hug. "Sam! We were hoping you'd get here soon."
She closed the door as he stepped in and sat in the chair, then hopped on the bed and crossed her legs to sit squaw style.
Her short black curls bounced as she asked, "Did you write some good songs? Georgie can't wait to see them."
"Where is he?" Sam looked around, then stood up as Georgie came into the room.
The two brothers greeted each other and Sam sat back down, bending over to rummage through his notebook in his guitar case.
He handed a sheaf of papers to Georgie, who took them and, sitting beside Trish on the bed, scanned them, mouthing the words as he read.
Georgie looked up and raised his eyebrows. "These are good, little brother."
"Yeah, I thought so too." Sam strummed a few chords, then a quick riff, speeding it up to end abruptly. "I thought you could play something like this."
Georgie squinted his eyes and grinned. "Yeah, I think we can put it together."
Trish took the papers from Georgie as he picked up his guitar and followed Sam's lead, changing it up in spots.
Looking up, she raised her voice over the music, "What's her name, Sam?"
Georgie stopped playing and smirked at his brother as he shrugged his shoulder. "Might as well answer her now. Trust me on that."
Sam tried to avoid her question, but at Trish's coaxing he told them both about Sarah.
"It sounds like you really like her." Trish said, softly.
Sam shook his head and shrugged, "I don't know, I've never met anyone like her."
He packed up his guitar and looked at the clock on the bedside table, "I'm wiped out, I just want to go to my room. I need a shower and I'll probably order room service. I'll see you in the morning."
After he left, Trish looked at Georgie, "Why didn't you tell him that Gisette will be here tonight?"
She looked at the clock, "In fact, she and Julien should be here any minute."
Georgie shrugged his shoulders, "I thought he'd like a surprise."
"It'll be a surprise alright, Gisette will be real surprised that he has a girlfriend." She chuckled, evilly. "Ding dong the bitch is gone!"
Sam turned on the hot water as soon as he got to his room. By the time he entered the shower, the bathroom was filled with billowing puffs of moist steam.
He soaped his body, lathering up and letting the hot water rinse away the road dust. He had his hair lathered and was massaging it in, when he felt cool hands on him.
As he jumped sideways, hitting the wall, and cursing, the shampoo ran in rivulets, stinging and blinding him and he couldn't find the shower spray fast enough.
The hands were warming up in the water, bringing a response from his body. He heard the french accented voice murmuring his name and he felt the blood leave his head, gathering down lower.
"Gisette, what are you doing here?" Her only reply was to take him into her mouth. He felt the hot wetness of her mouth and his hands slammed palm first on the wall behind her.
He tried, vainly, to back away, but his body was responding faster, moving his hips back to her. The motion only increased the friction.
With a deep throated growl, he lifted her up, pushing her against the wall, and slid into her.
His hips moved sinuously, of their own accord, matching Gisette's thrusts, then, hearing her moan, he ground into her, releasing all the pent up sexual restraint of the past two days.
Gisette slid her body against his, wrapping her arms around his neck. Sam gasped, throwing his head back, and choked as water poured into his open mouth.
He felt her rubbing against him, and he moved her away, before his body betrayed him again.
Stepping out of the shower, he wrapped a towel around his hips. "We need to talk."
He growled and walked into the other room.
Gisette followed, wrapped in a towel. She crawled onto his bed, motioning for him to join her.
Sam sat in the chair, across the room.
"Gisette, I thought we agreed that it was over." He leaned forward, speaking roughly.
"No, Sam," She shook her head, her long black hair falling in damp waves around her shoulders. "I didn't agree to anything. You didn't say we were over, either."
Her lower lip trembled as she whispered. "You just said good bye and left."
Sam laid his head on the back of the chair and exhaled loudly. In a way, she was right.
Gisette had been a well known model, with long lean legs and a lithe body. Her stormy grey eyes had stared out from a multitude of magazine ads. She was also the daughter of Julien, their manager.
Gisette had given up modeling and started to work with her father. When she and Sam first met in Julien's office, they both recognized the fire that burned in the other. The sexual heat sparked between them with their first handshake.
Within the first half hour, Gisette had led Sam back to her office and they had spent the afternoon there in that locked room. She and Sam had been lovers for about 6 months.
When it was time for him to leave on tour, he'd just told her good bye and left, just like she'd just said. He hadn't tried to contact her and she had never traveled with Julien before.
Sam got so caught up in the tour and the girls after the concerts, that he rarely thought about her, and when he did, he thought she had just gone on with her life, too. He didn't know why she was here now.
"Listen to me now. I am saying it. It's over, Gisette." Sam got up, running his hands through his wet hair as he paced the floor. "I've met someone else, you and I are done."
Gisette looked at him through her thick black lashes, "If you say we are done," she ran her tongue around her lips, smiling slyly, "how do you explain what just happened?"
"That," Sam expounded, pointing at the bathroom, "should never have happened!"
"But it did, Sam," Gisette undid her towel, throwing it on the floor. "We have lost time to make up for."
She laid back on the pillows and stretched lazily, revealing herself to him. "There are a lot of other things we could be doing right now."
"Fucking cut that out, Gisette!" Sam reached to pick up her towel, and her hand flicked out quickly, pulling his towel from his hips.
He took a step forward, and gave her a menacing look. He perused her body with cool eyes, as she ran her hands down her stomach...
Her eyes ran hungrily over him. Her body heated up as she drank in the sight of his long muscular legs and the thick black silky hair at the apex, and what was definitely growing before her eyes.
She stared, transfixed as her pulse picked up and she felt the hot flush of need gather inside her.
"Gisette." He warned as he grabbed for the towel she was holding.
She held it out from him, giggling and twisting back on the bed as she jumped up. "You want this?"
She put it behind her. "Come get it." She teased.
He put one knee on the bed. "Don't play games."
He threatened as he tried to focus only on her face, but his eyes kept dropping down, watching her breasts as they bounced, then lower to her shaved mound. He stopped as he gazed at the velvety skin.
His fingertips could already feel the heat that was hidden between the creases and his mouth watered as he thought of how much he wanted to taste her again. Just a small taste..
Gisette pulled the covers back, and slid under them, pulling the towel with her. "Come under here, Sam."
She held out the corner of the sheet, teasingly inviting him. "Come... inside me again."
Sam grabbed the covers, and threw them on the floor, causing her to shriek. He started to slowly crawl onto the bed, as if stalking his prey.
Gisette laid back, opening herself wide on the bed and waited as she saw that his body was fully aroused, and he was ready for her once again.
They both stopped, frozen, when they heard the knock on the door.
"Get dressed," he hissed. He hunted frantically for his clothes, and the knock sounded again, louder.
"Just a minute!" he yelled angrily as he fought to shove his way through the twisted legs of his jeans.
He looked at Gisette, mutinously sitting in the center of his bed. He shook his head as he opened the door.
Trish stepped in, uninvited. "I thought I should come tell you that Julien and.......", she trailed off and her eyes widened as took in the scene in front of her.
Sam stood with his zipper down, erection visibly outlined through the jeans that were only partially pulled over his ass.
Gisette was sitting, naked, in the rumpled bed, her hair was tangled and damp, her face was still flushed. She didn't bother to cover her nakedness, instead she glared at Trish, as if challenging her.
"Well, I guess you already know. Sorry for the interruption." Trish rushed out of the room.
"Oh fuck!" Sam sat down in the chair and put his head in his hands. He raised his head and looked at Gisette, frustration in his voice. "Get out of my room!"
Gisette got out of bed, running her hands through her hair, displaying her body for Sam to see.
With her back to him, she leaned over, reaching to pick up her panties from the floor.
She smiled to herself when she heard Sam suck in his breath at the sight of the exposed areas of her body.
She slowly got dressed, pulling on her bikini underwear, and running her hand over the front and between her legs, watching Sam's eyes as they followed her every move.
She slipped her brassiere straps over her shoulders and reached in to adjust her breasts.
She made sure he was watching as she ran her fingertips over the nipples, bringing them out to rosy peaks that pushed against the lacy cups.
Sam's eyes glazed over and his breath came quicker as he watched, his eyes drawn to this reverse stripping that she was performing for him.
He became aware of the tightness of his jeans and he shifted in the chair, as he adjusted himself, hissing as he felt the denim push abrasively over sensitive areas.
He knew what Gisette was doing. It was what she was best at, what had attracted him to her from the very beginning. But he felt powerless to stop and she knew it.
He felt the familiar ache in his groin and he tried to fight it. But he just knew how good it felt to fuck her. And at the moment his brain was running on that track only, sending out sparks and flashes of heat that his body was responding to.
Gisette stood in front of him, picked up his hand and placed it on her breast. His heartbeat speeded up and his arousal was becoming increasingly painful, throbbing against the rough fabric.
She leaned down to him, burying his face in her breasts and he could hear the rapid beat of her heart as his fingers pinched her nipples into hard peaks.
He lowered his head, trailing hot wet kisses until his mouth found her softness, and his tongue pushed against the silk panties. She slid them off and held his head as he continued his exploration, tasting and teasing as she whispered his name.
Finally she could take no more and she straddled him. "This, Sam. This is what you want." She whispered in his ear as her hand reached in to free him from the unbearable tightness.
Her sexy accent as she continued to whisper, and her tongue as it slid over the soft spot under his ear, she knew every move that would send him over the edge.
He groaned as her felt her slide down on him, encompassing him in her heat. He raised his hips, pushing up, going deeper. Gisette matched each thrust, sliding up and down with increasing urgency. Her hands pulled at his hair, then moved to his shoulders for leverage as she quickened the pace.
"Fuck! Fuck!.....Fu-u-ck" He squeezed his eyes shut and clenched his jaw as he jerked up once more, then he stopped and sat still, drawing in deep breaths through his clenched teeth.
Gisette lowered her head, looking at the spot where their bodies were joined. Her fingers reached down to tangle in the damp black curls that tickled against her. "You can't deny it, Sam. We are supposed to be together."
Sam threw his head back, glaring at her. He growled. "This isn't what I want."
Gisette gave a small sarcastic laugh. "Really?"
She cocked her head as she looked closely at him. "You were enjoying that as much as I was."
Sam pushed her off his lap, standing up to look down on her as she curled up in the chair. "You're good, Gisette. Just as fucking hot as I remember, but you're not what I want. My dick may get hard for you, but that's it. That's all this was. A quick fuck to relieve myself."
He reached down and picked up her panties, throwing them at her. His voice was scornful. "Now get the fuck out of my room!"
Gisette carefully hid the hurt that she was feeling as she stood and dressed. Her side glances at Sam told her that she was no longer welcome there.
The disgust on his face cut deep into her, raising her anger. She could feel it hot, burning in her chest.
She paused at the door, and pushed her lips hard against his, as her hand crept inside the open zipper of his jeans and her fingertips caressed him.
"If it's games we're playing, you should know, I don't play fair." She whispered against his lips.
Sam clenched his jaw when he felt a sharp tug on the soft black hairs.
Sam closed the door, leaning his head against it. Fucking Gisette was a mistake, a huge mistake, one that he had better make sure he never did again.
Hopefully, she would be leaving soon, before Sarah got here.
***
Sarah and Pete had finished off the pizza, and were relaxing in the tent. Side by side, they kicked back, leaning on their elbows, legs stretched out before them.
They shared a joint in silence, listening to the music from the radio and the rain splatter on the tent roof. The windows were open and the breeze carried in the fresh summer scents from the outside.
Sarah leaned back her head and inhaled "What is it about being by this lake? The air smells so good."
Pete laughed, "You mean like fish?"
"No!" she turned her head towards him, laughing. "Didn't you ever notice how, when you leave the area, and you come back home, you can tell that you're getting closer to the lake? The air just smells better and it feels lighter on your skin."
Pete turned and propped his head on his hand. "Do you like living here that much?" He sounded wistful.
"I never realized how much until I went away to college. I missed this town, yeah, but I think I really missed the lake more. Where ever I end up living, it has to be near water." She smiled and tipped her head back.
"Where do you think you will live? Do you think you would stay around here, or are you headed for a big city?" He asked.
Pete wondered what their summers would be like in the future. He knew the possibility of the three of them getting jobs in other cities was great. There wasn't much of a future in their little town.
Sarah answered thoughtfully. "I don't know. The thought of working in a big city is exciting. Meeting the people, being in the middle of the action. I think that's also the part that scares me a little."
Pete was quiet, so Sarah asked him. "What do you see in your future?"
He sighed as he lay back, folding his hands under his head, "Getting the fuck out of this town, for sure. I don't like living where everybody knows your business."
"So you can live anonymously, you mean? Someplace where people don't know you?" She bit her lip, anxiously. "You know, Pete, not everyone is like your father. Most people don't care whether you like males or females. The attitudes are changing towards gays, just like they are for women's equality. People are learning to tolerate a lot more."
"Do you know that it's against the law to be gay?" Pete asked angrily. "Wait, let me clarify that, it's not against the law to be gay; it's against the law to act upon those feelings."
"Those laws are changing, Pete." Sarah said forcefully.
He closed his eyes and shook his head, exhaling loudly, "I don't even think those laws apply to me anymore."
Sarah looked puzzled, "What do you mean by that?"
Pete spoke low, and Sarah bent her head closer, to hear him over the rain and the music in the background. "Do you know that I haven't been with anyone for over a year? I've been on dates, but they have all ended bad. I haven't felt that...". He paused as he tried to think of a way to describe it to her. "I haven't been attracted to other guys like I thought was before."
Sarah looked at his closed face, "Are you attracted to girls now?" She tried to imagine the pain and confusion he must be going through.
"I don't know." Pete sounded miserable. He opened his eyes and saw her face close to his.
She watched as they opened wider, turning a darker grey. She recognized that look from before.
She was mesmerized as he reached for her face, hooking his finger under her chin, he slowly brought her closer. "Baby..."
He was interrupted by Dave's loud greeting as he unzipped the door. Midgie came running in after him, stopping short as she saw Sarah and Pete jump up, guiltily.
"Damn it's raining hard! Hey, you two, are you ready to party?" Midgie asked gaily, then she sent a furtive look at Sarah.
Sarah shook her head slightly, her eyes sent a message that Midgie understood, 'I"ll tell you later'.
Dave lit up a joint, and handed it to Pete. "Let's get it started!" He howled and launched himself at Midgie and she fell back, giggling as he landed on her.
The four sat in a circle on the floor, playing Scrabble and enjoying their evening.
After several joints had been smoked and a large quantity of beer had been consumed, Sarah looked over and caught Pete looking at her tray of letters.
"Hey!", she yelled and gave him a good natured push. "No cheating!"
Pete grabbed her and Dave and Midgie laughed and shouted encouragement, as they tussled on the floor.
Pete finally got her down, leaning over her, pinning her arms over her head and his hips against her legs to stop her as she wriggled under him.
Sarah looked up into his eyes as they stared into hers, just a few inches away, and felt her heart give a thump, as she felt his arousal against her leg.
She stopped, still, and Pete closed his eyes and rested his forehead against hers.
"Uncle" She said weakly.
Dave clapped loudly, and cheered, providing the distraction they both needed to untangle. They sat back down in the circle to resume their game, still very aware of each other.
Midgie put down her cards and rummaged through her bag, "Sarah, you have to try this pill."
She opened her hand, revealing a small black capsule. "Not tonight though, you won't get any sleep. But take it tomorrow morning, it will get you going, trust me." She winked, slyly.
"What is it?" Sarah asked as she took it from Midgie's hand and looked closely at it. She looked up in surprise. "Is this a black beauty? I've heard of them."
Midgie answered her, as her eyes sparkled, excitedly. "Yeah, I got some from one of the ladies at the salon. You take one of those, and you feel great. You aren't hungry and the energy it gives you is out of this world! I took one this afternoon, and I am still flying, I swear!"
"Cool! I'll take it in the morning, before we go to Cleveland." She tucked it in the cellophane of her cigarette pack.
Dave grabbed Midgie in a bear hug, "I think we should go now. I want to catch you as you're flying high, sweetheart!" He gave her a kiss, then stood up. "You two have a good night, also." He winked at Pete as they left the tent.
Pete and Sarah said their goodbyes and started to clean up the tent. She bent over to pick up a bottle and weaved sideways, laughing as he caught her.
"You know, Dave thinks we're going to do something here tonight." Pete said. He held her lightly around the waist, his hands massaging the bare skin.
Sarah smelled the beer on their breath as she felt herself moving closer to him. "Maybe we've had too much to drink." She said cautiously.
"Maybe." Pete's hand rubbed down her back and he leaned his forehead against hers.
"What's going on with you and Sam?" He whispered, hesitantly.
She shook her head, just slightly. "I don't know" She answered hesitantly. "We've just met."
"Have you slept with him?" Pete didn't want to ask, he didn't know if he was ready for the answer.
Sarah closed her eyes, "No, not yet." She added quietly, "But I probably will."
Pete pulled her into his arms, resting his chin on top of her head. He liked holding her like this, and he noticed that Sarah had wrapped her arms around his waist, and was leaning against him.
They stood for awhile, listening to the rain pounding steadily on the roof of the tent.
"Hey," Pete said, "do you remember when we used to go to the beach in the rain?"
Sarah smiled as she reminisced, "Yeah, it was fun." She looked at him impishly. "Wanna do it again?"
"Yeah, that'd be cool."
Sarah dug into the footlocker, finding their old rain slickers at the bottom, while Pete found the flashlights.
She pulled out the canvas sheeting that used to hang down the middle of the tent, and they decided to take it to sit on.
Pete took a couple joints from the cigar box, tucking them into his cigarette pack.
He stood at the door to the tent and watched as Sarah put on her slicker and pulled the hood over her head, tucking in her braid. "Are we ready?"
"Let's do this!" she said, excitedly.
They each took a flashlight and ran down the path, laughing like children. Both were excited and playful, reverting back to the times they had done it before, several years ago.
They reached the rise at the top of the beach and ran down onto the sand. Pete stretched out the canvas, and he and Sarah collapsed on it, giggling and out of breath.
He pulled Sarah close to him, drawing her between his bent knees, and wrapped her inside his slicker, then tucked the canvas around them until only their faces showed.
He rested his head on her shoulder, his lips near her ear, so they could talk over the sound of the rain and the waves.
They were stunned into silence, though, watching as the water churned and turned back on itself, thrashing and curling into waves, then thundering to shore, a few feet from them.
The clouds covered the moon completely, but occasionally it glowed through, turning the dark waves to silver.
The magnitude of the lake was overpowering, and the rain drummed down on them, adding to the cadence of the waves, leaving them to sit in an awed appreciation of mother nature. Their bodies were cocooned in the canvas creating a comforting, moist heat.
Sarah closed her eyes, leaning back into Pete. She flashed back on other times they had sat like this and realized that the last time was when they were sleeping together. She remembered they had made love on the beach, in a rainstorm; maybe even here in this same spot.
She felt Pete's arms tighten around her and knew he was remembering it also.
"I'm sorry I hurt you." His voice was soft, she felt his warm breath against her ear.
Sarah smiled in the darkness; he had never said that before. All the years since that summer, they had avoided talking about it. This summer, it looked like that was going to change.
Maybe they needed to talk about it before they could move on in life.
That chapter of their life couldn't really be closed until they had talked and cleared the air between them.
"I know you didn't mean to, Pete." Sarah turned towards him. The canvas covering them slid down to their shoulders, and the rain soaked their hair. Neither noticed, their thoughts focused solely on each other.
Pete leaned forward and gave her a tender kiss. "You've been really good to me, a best friend when I've needed one the most."
"That's the way it's always been. You've been there for me too." Sarah was a little in shock from her reaction to his kiss. It had lasted just a second, but it had stirred up emotions that she had kept buried deep.
Earlier in the tent, she had thought he would kiss her, and she had been intrigued to see what it would feel like. Now she knew.
Pete saw her face softening as she looked up at him. He leaned forward and kissed her again, feeling her lips moving against his as she returned the kiss.
Pete slowly smiled. "I never thought I'd ever kiss you like this again."
Sarah gave him a crooked smile, "Neither did I."
She laid her head on his chest, feeling the dampness of his tee, warm against her cheek. He held her, curled in his arms, and they both savored the closeness.
"You know, you don't have to go see Sam tomorrow." Pete spoke up.
Sarah felt her little bubble of happiness burst, the fragments tumbled down on her, mixed in with the rain. If she still wanted to see Sam, why was she doing this with Pete?
It wasn't like she could go back to him, he had already broken her heart once.
She sat very still as she tried to think of a way to explain it to Pete.
Pete was figuring it out on his own, though. Her silence said much more than she could have. He mentally cursed himself for mentioning Sam and ruining the moment.
"Maybe we should head back." Sarah said and sat away from him. Pulling his slicker closed on his chest, she kept her head down.
Pete lifted her face up, his grey eyes matched the dark clouds above. "I'm sorry. I spoke without considering your feelings. It seems I always do that, I guess."
Sarah spoke, and he heard the pain in her voice. "I can't commit to you like I did before. It hurts too bad when it's over."
She raised her voice over his protests. "You don't know, Pete! How do you know that a few months, or even a week, from now, you won't meet someone else?"
He looked at her. He loved her, he always had. How could he know for sure that they could have a future together if she wouldn't give him a chance?
"So where do we go from here?" He hoped she had an answer, because he had no idea.
"I don't know. I am still going to see Sam, I liked being with him. I want....." Sarah stopped and looked closely at Pete.
"What? Finish what you were saying." Pete said tensely.
"I guess I just want to see if there's a future with him." The rain was running down Sarah's back and didn't feel so comforting now as it soaked into her shirt, she shivered as she spoke.
Pete saw the shiver as it ran through Sarah and realized there wasn't any point in arguing on the beach.
He helped her up and she helped him fold the canvas, attempting to look in his face as she brought her fold to match his.
"Please," she pleaded, "I don't want to argue."
"We'll talk about it in the tent. Let's get you out of the rain." Pete kept his head down as he led her to the path.
Their trip back up the path was definitely different than before. Pete held her arm and guided her silently, while Sarah kept her head down and bit her lip, trying to keep away the tears.
Pete kept his back turned, as they changed into dry clothes, and then met in the middle of the tent. Sitting down on Sarah's bag they faced each other.
He saw Sarah's stubbornness flare up as she crossed her arms against her chest. He took a joint out of his cigarette pack, offering it to her, then lit it as she held it to her mouth.
"So, you're telling me you won't go out with me?" Pete held his voice low.
"We hang out all the time now. Can't we just keep it that way? Why does it have to change?" Sarah argued, her eyes sparkled with the tears she was holding back.
"Because I liked holding you and kissing you." Pete said matter of factly. "And so did you."
Sarah felt a tear slip out, and she reached up to swipe it away.
"Yeah, I did." She admitted. "That doesn't mean we can go back to that so easily. You have no idea how hard it was for me before."
"Do you think it was easy for me?" Pete looked at her in disbelief. "You think that the next day, I just went out and got a boyfriend? Fuck! Sarah! I agonized over that for years!"
"So you come back to me now?" Sarah was getting more upset. "I'm not the girl you can just come back to fuck while you make up your mind!"
Pete jumped up and looked down at her, "I can't believe that's how you think I feel about you."
He picked up his keys, and paused before he left the tent. "I love you, Sarah. I never thought of you that way. And I think we have a chance..a fucking good chance......but I won't share you. It's either Sam or me."
Sarah heard his engine roar and his tires spinning, before catching in the gravel. She crawled into her sleeping bag and cried herself to sleep.