I didn't go back to school until Thursday, the guys told me all about the prelims and how they made it into regionals. Haru hasn't spoken to me at all...maybe he's mad at me. But he doesn't really have a reason to be, I've been away on business matters...
Although I am guilty of talking to Rin, we've been emailing each other a lot lately. Ever since our little walk, we've become really good friends. He didn't mention Haru being at the prelims but he said he won which I suppose is a good thing but now that I think about it, it means Haru lost right? He doesn't seem upset though, they won the medley relay so I guess that's all that matters to him.
"Jun, I want to tell you something" Makoto said.
?
"What's up Makoto?" I asked.
We walked to the other end of the hallway.
"I would like permission to take Sakura out tonight"
"Wait...you take Sakura out?"
He began to blush.
He's serious! I haven't been home since I was dropped off here, Sakura hasn't gotten a chance to say anything to me which means...Something did happen and the result is that Makoto wants to be with my sister.
"Makoto, am I dreaming? Is this some kind of perfect dream? You want to take Sakura out...This is real"
He looked at me confused.
I pinched myself. "Okay this is definitely real. Makoto..."
I looked at him.
He gulped.
"Of course you can take her out! I'm so happy you asked! You're like the ideal guy I've always wanted for my sister~" I hugged him.
"I am?"
"Yes! You're such an amazing guy, I really am happy that you've decided to do this. My answer is yes!"
I heard some girls squeal.
"Junkoto is real!" One screamed.
They all got all giddy and fan girled.
I pulled away from Makoto. "Guess we should've waited until later? This won't be good..."
They probably took pictures...
I sighed.
Makoto had his usual warm sweet smile.
I smiled back at him.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I wanted to talk to Haru but wasn't sure on what to say. It's not like I can just go up to him and say hey Haru. I think that would be weird...
I went up to where the swimming pool was. I don't feel like going to class, I just want to be here, listen to music and look at the water.
I sat down, the wall against my back.
Grandfather is feeling way better, I'm glad that he's able to be out and about. He explained how he had invested in Samezuka because it was worth 2x more than any of the other academies around here, he also said that he was indeed the new chairman of the school but of course he wasn't going to be there 24/7...Still though it's odd to be going back and forth between Iwatobi and Samezuka, of course my place is here but what'll happen if I end up falling for Rin? Or what if I learn to swim but ditch Haru and the others for my selfish needs...
A shadow blocked the sun and I opened my eyes.
!
I took my headphones off. "H-Haru..."
"What're you doing here?" He asked.
Ouch. That hurt a little...
"I could ask you the same" I said.
"I didn't know what to do so I came here" he said as he dried his hair.
"Guess I felt that way too" I said.
"Do you want to swim?" He asked.
"Right now?" I asked. "Haru someone could see me..."
"Then tonight" he said. "No one comes here at night."
I don't understand him...I thought he was mad at me but I guess I should be grateful he's talking to me.
"What time?" I asked.
He shrugged. "You tell me"
"7?"
"Don't be late" he said then walked back to the pool.
I got up and went to go see him swim. All I wanted to do is jump in and swim beside him...
We're going to swim together one day. I promise
I hope that day comes soon...
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Lesson 1:
I met Haru at 7, I was a bit skeptical about this...but I want to swim again more than anything else in the world. I want to be one with the water again...
I had to borrow Sakura's one piece swim suit. She used to be a life guard and this is the only thing she had...it was either this or a bikini and I definitely wasn't going to wear the bikini...
I decided to stretch first, I was really nervous about this. It's been a long time since I stepped into a pool, I stretched my arms and legs. Nothing was hurting so maybe this won't be so hard.
I looked into the pool, Haru looked like a fish in a bowl. Well actually not a fish but a dolphin. I loved watching him swim, he understands the water just as the water understands him...
He surfaced and looked at me. "Don't just stand there, get in"
!
I looked around, there isn't a ladder.
"Haru, I don't know about this..." I said.
"Sit here then slowly come in. I'm right here. I promise nothing's going to happen" he said.
I gulped.
My heart was racing.
"O-Okay...here goes" I said as I sat down.
My feet touched the water.
!
It feels kind of cold.
Haru extended his hand towards me. I held his hand and slowly slid down, I closed my eyes.
"Haru, I'm scared" I said.
I felt his hands holding mine. "You don't have to be. The hard part is over, you're in the pool now."
I opened my eyes and looked around me. I'm in the water...I looked at Haru.
"First things first, let's walk a little."
"B-But-"
"I got you...don't be afraid."
Hand in hand he guided me, I can't believe I'm here...it's almost like a dream.
"Can you float?" He asked.
"I think so." I said.
"Turtle float" he said.
I was scared but I can't keep being scared all the time.
I did as he said.
"You can float, That's a good sign. I'll hold your hands and you kick with your legs"
He moves pretty quick but the sooner I can do this the better.
He took my hands and I stretched out. I took a deep breath and began to kick. This feels nice, feeling the cool water against my skin...this is what I wanted.
"Stand up, we'll do some arm exercises now. I need to see if you can do this without being harmed" he said.
I stood up. "Sure"
This is what I fear the most...
He began explaining to me what and how to do it. Even if I already had the idea of it, it was easier said than done.
My arms weren't hurting in any way which is a good sign so far.
"Good. Now you should rest, I know it didn't seem like much but this is going to be a process, be patient" he said.
"Thank you Haru" I looked at him. "I know this takes effort and..."
?
He wasn't even by my side anymore. I looked around, he was just floating in the water.
"I'm listening" he said.
I smiled. "Thank you, that's all I wanted to say"
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Lesson 2:
This consisted of his arms under my abdominal region while I kicked and stroked with my arms. This is definitely a huge leap in progress but I guess because my body was so familiar with this it felt natural.
"Keep going" he said.
I haven't really talked to him about anything at all. When we come here and he teaches me, that's it. He walks me home and during that time he doesn't say a word to me...I want him to say something but I know that isn't going to happen.
"Are you okay?" He asked.
"Yeah" I said.
"Keep going, do it faster this time and see if it triggers any pain" he said.
I did as he said that's when I felt it.
!
I stopped.
"I felt the pain..." I said.
I was worried now, if this goes on I'll only be damaging it further...
I was discouraged now.
"I think this is enough for tonight." I said.
I stood there and felt angry.
I suggest from now on you don't do any swimming or anything that has to do with sports Ms. Karashima. I'm very sorry...
It's not fair...
I got out of the pool and grabbed my towel.
Are you sure doc? I can't swim, not even a little?
You tore some pretty important muscles, over time I'm not sure that it'll get better and if you force it then it'll only get worse. Ms. Karashima, I'm so sorry...
I stared at the water and wanted to cry but what good will crying bring me? I think I'll just go home and finish up my homework.
I dried my hair and did my best to dry myself. I put on my shorts and sweater, not saying anything to Haru, I left.
×××××××××××××××××××××××××××××××××
"How'd it go?" Sakura asked.
"Great. But I have lots of homework... I'm going to shower and get started on it" I said.
"Aren't you hungry? I made you some food"
"No thanks.." I said and walked upstairs.
This is a waste of time...what was I thinking?
I got in the shower and it was sore where I felt the pain earlier. Why did I ever assume that this was going to end well?
It's not fair...
It's not fair! I felt warm tears stream down my face.
I took a deep breath.
Get a hold of yourself Jun, you knew this was going to happen...
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Lesson 3:
I showed up to the pool to tell Haru that this wasn't going to work. I took a deep breath.
Haru seemed to have just gotten here, he's not in the pool yet.
He turned around and looked at me. "Why didn't you come dressed to swim"
"Haru, this is a waste of time. I'm never going to swim again..."
"Is that what you believe?" He asked.
"It is..."
"You were swimming on your own yesterday" he said. "I didn't see a problem until you started putting stronger strokes in, you should know that there are different types of styles but no one can take away your freedom unless you let them."
I was?
"Haru...you don't understand, this was my life once...but not anymore"
"Why not? You swim beautifully." He said.
!
"Is competition that important? I thought you just wanted to swim..."
He's right...
He walked towards me. "I promised I'd help you and I will."
"Haru..."
"Come on, you're going to swim. That's why you're here, you didn't come to say you were going to give up because I'm not going to allow that"
"I didn't bring anything to swim in." I said.
Took a pair of his swim jammers out of his bag. "I have extra"
I let out a soft laugh.
"Haru, you never cease to surprise me"
"Hurry the water's waiting" he said as he handed them to me.
"Okay okay but I can't change if you're looking" I said.
He turned around. "Just put them on already"
I put them on as fast as I could and took my sweater off.
"Okay."
He turned back around. "Looks good, come on"
He grabbed my wrist and pulled me along.
"I want you to dive, don't think about it. Just do it" he said.
I stood on the platform.
He got in the pool and stood by.
I've felt this sensation before...a long time ago. I smiled to myself.
On your mark...get set...go!
I dove into the pool and without thinking about it I began to swim, I'm swimming... I'm doing it!
I rose up to the surface.
Haru looked at me, a warm smile on his face.
I went over to him and hugged him.
"Haru..."
I cried but they weren't tears of sadness...they were tears of happiness.
"Thank you...Thank you so so much..."
I felt his arms around me.
"I knew you could do it...now we can swim together. Free...always remember that"
"I will" I slightly pulled away and looked at him.
!!
His eyes widened.
So close...
I felt like I was blushing, I pulled away completely and cleared my throat. Wasn't expecting that...
He went under the water and resumed swimming.
What the hell am I doing? Ugh. Even if we haven't spoken much when I'm around Haru I feel...strange.
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"Are you hungry?" I asked.
"No, I'm fine"
"Not even for mackerel?"
"With pineapple?" He looked at me.
"Sure." I smiled.
We walked into the house, I turned on the lights only to see Makoto and Sakura about to kiss.
!
Sakura and Makoto were beet red.
I looked at Haru.
"Makoto, I didn't realize you were so disrespectful."
Makoto: D-Disrespectful?! N-No it's not what you think! I came to look for you and-
"Tsk tsk tsk. Makoto, how could you?"
He bowed like a hundred times and apologized to me.
"Makoto calm down. I'm kidding, I already told you it's okay to date Sakura even though I have a feeling you two have already been going out behind my back" I said.
"Well what about you and Haru?!" Sakura asked.
!
"Wh-What about me and Haru?!"
"You say you're going swimming but what are you really doing!"
!!
"Swimming stupid! What else?!"
Makoto: Heh. Uhhh...no need to get angry.
"Oh yeah?! Well why do you dress like a girl when you go swim huh?!"
"Because what else am I going to wear?! I am a girl you dumb girl!"
"Dumb?! You're dumb!"
"You are! Accusing me of doing things other than swimming! Haru and I haven't done anything!"
"Then why do you talk about him in your sleep?!"
!!
"Mm!" I began to feel the heat rise to my face. "Why are you watching me sleep for?! Stay out of my room!"
Haru and Makoto looked at each other.
"It's my house too! Why don't you just admit it!"
"Sakura I'm going to kick your ass if you don't shut up! You're just embarrassed that I caught you and Makoto!"
She turned a deep shade of red.
"Y-Yeah?! So what?!"
I rolled my eyes.
Makoto: Please calm down.
I took a deep breath. "Look, whatever you two do on your own time is your business. Don't go accusing Haru and I if you don't know, plus for your information... I actually swam today. On my own"
Makoto: Really? That's great Jun!
"It's all thanks to...Haru?"
He came back with a can of mackerel. "Do you have a can opener?"
Sakura: You're gonna eat that?
"What's wrong with it? Don't you like mackerel?"
"Not out of the can..." She said.
Makoto and I chuckled.
"Haru, we have a kitchen. No need to eat it like that, come on"
I cooked the mackerel for Haru then added the pineapple. I've never tried it like this but it smelled pretty good. I gave him a bowl of rice to go with it.
"Aren't you going to eat?" He asked.
"No, I'm not hungry. You go ahead" I smiled. "It's the least I can do to thank you...You know Haru, I'm grateful to have someone like you in my life. I might of never gotten the courage to get in the pool or water in general ever again. I may not be able to swim competitively anymore but you gave me back something that no one else was able to give me"
He looked at me. "And...what was that?"
"You gave me my love back. I've always loved the water but once I lost that ability to swim or at least the thought I had...I felt empty. But you filled that emptiness in me Haru and for that I'll always be in your debt"
His eyes sparkled. I guess that's his way of expressing happiness, I smiled at him.
My heart was beating faster and I began to wonder if maybe...I was developing something for him. How can I? I mean Haru...it's Haru...I don't know. I feel comfortable around him even if he doesn't really say much, it's a silence that I've grown fond of.