a/n: heyyyyyyyy guys! so i've started another eremin fanfic! it's called "Let's Go Home," and it's a tokyo ghoul au where basically armin gets turned into a half ghoul like kaneki did. then, it starts getting interesting. it currently has one chapter up, and if you enjoy tokyo ghoul, I would be super psyched if you read it! thank you guys!
It was the day. It was the day that Eren and Mikasa have been getting so excited for, trying to pull me into their happiness.
It didn't work.
It was my birthday. The day I turned 16. As I laid awake in bed, early morning sunlight pouring in through my window, I clenched my hands. I didn't want to remember. I wanted to forget.
It was my tenth birthday. My parents promised me that they would take me to see the ocean today, I'd never been, as it was nearly two hours away from our house, and my parents didn't have the time to spare. Needless to say, I was excited.
All three of us clambered into the car in the early morning. We had agreed that I could open my presents when we got there, and I was practically bouncing off the walls in excitement. We drove and drove, and it seemed like time was passing a million times slower than it usually did.
It's funny how much can change in 30 seconds.
My dad never saw the truck coming. One moment, my parents and I were laughing together, and the next, my parent's mangled remains were sprawled across the dashboard, the front of an 18-wheeler smashed through the driver's side of the car.
I was lucky. I got away with whiplash and a broken leg. My parents were killed instantly. That was when I started living with grandfather, and the abuse began.
I sat up in my bed, gasping for air. I clutched the blankets that covered me, tears streaming down my face. I cried silently, my chest heaving in small sobs.
What a great way to start my sweet 16.
Of course, this was the moment that Eren decided to enter my room, a shit-eating grin on his face. No doubt he'd planned on waking me up. However, when he saw that I was already awake, curled up and with tears on my cheeks, the smile melted away.
He walked over and sat next to me on the bed. "What's wrong?" He asked gently, wiping the tears away. I shook my head, tiny droplets still squeezing out of my eyes.
"M-mom and dad." I whimpered, my lower lip quivering. "Its been six years." I whispered, looking Eren in the eyes. "And I still remember it like it was yesterday."
"Armin, sweetheart, what happened?" He said gently, pulling me towards him.
"They're gone. They're not coming back. Ohgoderentheydiedandicantforgetitwhycantiforgetitidontwanttoremember." I cried, bowing my head, hot tears dripping down onto the blanket. I shook as sobs wracked my body, and I felt Eren wrap himself around me.
"Oh, Armin I'm so sorry. You deserve so much more than this." He rubbed my back, letting me cry into his chest. After a few minutes, I withdrew, wiping my eyes.
"We should get dressed." I sniffled, scooting out of Eren's grasp and off of the bed. I was wearing just a oversized, trashed sweatshirt with some underwear and my binder underneath it. The horrible wave of dysphoria that hit the week before had subsided somewhat, but I still refused to take my binder off (except for showers, of course).
So when I took my sweatshirt off, it didn't even cross my mind that Eren would ask why I already had my binder on. Obviously, he did. I told him I just forgot to take it off last night and I accidentally slept with it on. I didn't like lying to Eren, but it had to be done.
He didn't buy it.
He came up behind me and wrapped his arms around me, resting his chin on my shoulder.
"How long have you been wearing it? Truthfully." He says gently. I sighed, letting my facade crack.
"A week." I murmured, hanging my head. I know it's bad, but my dysphoria is just so bad. It desperately hurts my ribs, and it gives me a ton of bruises, but it makes me feel better about my body, so, to me, it's worth it.
Eren sighed deeply. "I'm not gonna make you take it off for the day, but you need to take it off tonight, okay?" I nodded. Eren is too good to me, and he always makes sure that I'm safe and healthy, and he does his absolute best to make me happy. I love that boy to bits.
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Of course, my birthday had to fall on a school day.
Eren, Mika and I decided that it would be best if I opened my presents after school, so I got away with not having to wear any sort of silly clothes that they could have given given me. Thank god for that, I thought to myself.
The day went as any other did, for the most part. Some people that I knew peripherally came up to me and wished me a happy birthday. I thanked them, of course, but I'm fairly sure that Eren and Mika put them up to it.
Lunch, however, was a whole different affair.
I sat down at the table that Eren, Mika, and I share, neither of them having arrived yet. It wasn't all that unusual, so I simply pulled out my book and continued from my spot. Only a few moments later, I felt a tap on my shoulder. When I turned to see who it was, I was greeted with the sight of Eren and Mika holding a small cake. Immediately, my hands covered my mouth and little tears sprung at the corners of my eyes.
"Happy birthday to you," Eren and Mika sang. "Happy birthday to you, happy birthday dear Arminnnnnnnnnnnn." They held the "N" as I blushed, nearly squealing in happiness."Happy birthday to you!" They finished and put the cake on the table, next to me.
I was absolutely sure that my cheeks were a bright red when I pulled my hands away from my mouth and wrapped them around Eren and Mikasa, happy tears staining my cheeks.
"You guys are the best." I whisper to them, clutching them to me tightly. When I pulled away, we all sat down and cut into the delicious chocolate cake, with me being dumbfounded that they actually cared enough to plan all of this out. Their responses were along the lines of, of course we did, you're our best friend and you've been feeling down lately, we had to do something for your freaking birthday.
Of course, I was a blushing mess, stuffing my face with the cake that they'd picked for me, feeling absolutely flattered the whole time.
"I haven't gotten a birthday present in six years." I mumbled when I was done chewing some cake, brushing my nose out of nervous habit. Eren's mouth fell open.
"No way! Six years?" He gaped, eyes widening. I nodded, blushing even more.
"Ever since I moved in with grandpa." I shrugged. "You can- you can probably guess why." I mumbled, brushing a loose strand of hair out of my face. I took my fork into my hand and shoveled more cake in my mouth to stop the conversation from going any further. We were edging on dangerous territory, and I didn't want to go there.
But of course, a birthday meal wouldn't have been complete without Levi and his gang. Of course.
They trudged up to us smugly, a smirk plastered on Levi's face. I swallowed the bite of cake in my mouth. This was going to end badly.
"Eating cake, I see?" Levi asked accusation-ally. "Don't you think you're fat enough as it is? Cake sure isn't gonna help that." He continued, almost piteously. I clenched my jaw, refusing to give him the reaction he was looking for. Eren, however, was.
"What did you say, you piece of shit?" Eren growled, standing up from the table.
"Eren, don't." I said quietly, shooting him a look of sit the fuck down or this is gonna get really messy really quick and I can't deal with that right now. He got it. He took his seat again, but continued glaring at Levi.
"Ooh, protecting your little boyfriend, are you?" He looked down at me, a smirk tainting his lips.
"Levi, it's my fucking birthday. Now leave me the fuck alone before I let Eren beat the shit out of you." I replied coldly. I wasn't gonna take his bullshit. Not today.
"Fine." Levi said icily. "But don't think I'm gone forever!" He shouted as he walked away, sitting at a table, his gang following. As they passed me, they sneered things like "fat," "pig," and "fatass" at me. I rested my head in my hands, taking deep breaths and trying not to cry.
Eren reached across the table and put his hands on my shoulders. "Don't listen to them. They're just liars and cowards." He said gently. I removed my hands from my face, sniffling a little bit.
"Thank you." I respond, smiling at him. I tried to eat more, but whenever I brought the fork to my mouth, the words from before ran through my head, and I immidiately lost whatever appetite I'd gained. Losing a little weight couldn't hurt, I did have a bit of chub, anyways.
Little did I know that when we got home, I'd get the best birthday gift of my life.
a/n: hey guys! honestly, I just left this at a cliffhanger because it's midnight and I'm too lazy to write any more, especially because I really try to make it good for you guys. anyways, hope you enjoyed! can you guess what the gift is? probably lmao. by the way, I don't have to get knee surgery! turns out, it wasn't my acl, but I have really fucked up knees apparently so I have to go to physical therapy. I hope you guys are doing super amazingly well, and if you ever need someone to talk to, my messages are always open, as are my dms on instagram (which is psychojuuzou) and my ask box on tumblr (www.gay-cucumber.tumblr.com). have an awesome one, guys!