Osamu sat on a wooden box, under the tree, close to Chizuru's room. He had been waiting for her but it was most likely she had spent the night in Souji's room. Just the thought of him getting his hands on Chizuru made his stomach twist in knots. She must've told Green Eyes why she was crying, but if he knew Chizuru, she would keep it to herself. Hopefully...
But what right does he have to say he knows her? He abandoned her for god's sake, without the slightest idea how her life was after he left her at the stairs.
The sun has already risen, Chizuru should be in the kitchen by now preparing the food. It would be nice to pretend nothing ever happened last night, but the secrets were now out.
"She must hate me" he said lowly, his invisible ears drooped to the sides. He can't be without Chizuru now that he has grown accostumed to her, it's like being ripped away from your loved one.
No one can comfort him like her or even deal with his bad temper. He felt rejected, neglected and guilty all at once. Maybe now he can sort of understand how she felt that night.
The delightful aroma of breakfast filled the air. The corners of his mouth drooled. Breakfast was already finished, Osamu got up from the box and went out for a walk. He'd rather give Chizuru space and avoid any unsettling contact.
Chizuru was oddly quiet during breakfast. Well, the whole morning was quiet after all, without Osamu picking at breakfast and her scolding after catching him red handed. She missed his presence but after remembering last night, she could only feel betrayed.
A tear started welling up in her right eye, she wiped it away so no one would notice. Souji of course was the only one who saw the slight movement since he's right next to her,"Got something in your eye, Chizuru-chan?".
She smiled at him, but her voice sounded a little strained and weak,"Oh no, I'm just exhausted Okita-san"
"Yeah, crying all night can really worn you out huh?"
Everyone dropped their chopsticks and stopped chewing to look at them. Did they hear right or was Souji just being playful again? "Okita-san!" Chizuru gasped.
Sanousuke- "You were crying? Why?"
Saito-"I thought I'd heard something odd during the night"
Heisuke-"What did you do to Chizuru!!!??"
Souji-"Nee, don't yell at me short stack. You should be yelling at our beloved guest"
Hijikata-"Enough!!"
He slammed his fist down to shut down the noise, it's too early in the morning for that. He rubbed his temples and regained his calm,"Whatever reason Chizuru was crying is none of our business. It is her decision wether she wants to discuss it or not. So shut your trap and finish breakfast, we have things to discuss".
Heisuke-"Eeh?? But how can we ignore it? We don't know what made her cry! As her protectors we hav-"
Hijikata-"I swear Heisuke, if you don't eat your goddamn breakfast I'll make everyone know here why you ended up crying"
Heisuke was quiet after that.
She was outside washing the dirty cloths. The men were training more than ever now that they were planning an attack, despite the blanket of snow.
Everyone except Osamu, Chizuru left a tray of food for him in the kitchen. She might not want to see him but she doesn't have the heart to let him starve either. He would easily find the food with that keen nose of his, no need for any unwanted interaction...mostly from her part.
Chizuru scrubbed down on a blood stain, belonging to Souji. She begged him countless times to not spar with the other's, but he wouldn't listen. He made too much effort and had another one of his attacks. At any time, Souji would be headed to heaven.
She remembered what he told her last night, he loves her with all his sick heart. Maybe he just said that because she was crying, or maybe he loves her as a very good friend. Sano and Shinpachi always joke around when proclaiming their 'bromance'. But then again he kissed her three times already, probably out of teasing. But he kissed her after supposedly confessing to her, so he might actually love her?
"Whoa, calm down Chizuru. You'll end up scrubbing off the thread"
Sano grabbed her arm, she was too busy rummaging her thoughts. Sano noticed her mood hadn't changed since breakfast. He wanted to know what was going on and ask about what Souji said, Heisuke had a point in knowing about her sitauations.
"You don't have to hide anything from us Chizuru. We're your friends, so if anything is bothering you say something".
It's the very fact that they are her friends, she can't tell them. Chizuru already felt like a burden among them, she doesn't want to be a bother to them even more. "Thank you, Harada-san. But I'm alright, don't worry" she said with a not so convincing smile. He furrowed his eye brows worriedly, she was still bad at lying.
Chizuru gripped the bloody cloth and began to zone out. Sano saw the rag and could assume whose blood that was, "It's about Souji huh?". She scrunched her eyebrows and nodded, there was so much going on in her head. If only she could hear his confession again just to make sure she wasn't imagining things. Being very emotional made her mind a little hazy. "I think you should tell him" Sano said.
"Huh?"
"Well, you can be a little obvious, Chizuru. I know you have feelings for Souji" Sano chuckled while ruffling her hair. Someone 'ahemed' from behind, Souji had his eyebrows raised and blinked several times. "No wonder Chizuru didn't come to my room. You were hogging her, not fair Sano-san" Souji clicked his tounge and shaked his head as if he was disappointed.
"She didn't go to your room 'cause she's washing, Souji" Sano sighed.
"Mm hm, later Sano-san" Souji smirked as he encircled his arm around Chizuru. Sano rolled his eyes and laughed, "Don't keep her out too long, Souji. Chizuru isn't dressed warmly you know", he left to catch up with Shinpachi for some drinks.
"Maa maa, I got you"
After he left, Souji still had his arm on Chizuru. "So what were you guys talkin' about?" he asked. Chizuru blushed and covered her face with the rag,"Ano...no-nothing important".
"Chizuru, I know when you're lying to me"
She blushed even redder,"We...we were talking about Okita-san". Souji blinked again holding back a wide grin,"Oh, talking behind my back huh?".
"What? N-no that's not it...Harada-san said to...be honest with Okita-san"
Souji raised his eyebrow in curiosity, maybe he will get an answer from his confession. "What do you need to be honest with, Chizuru-chan?", he felt a little nervous. He was careful not to show it on his voice, Chizuru looked pretty serious so what she was going to say might be a negative thing.
Chizuru took a deep breath and looked at Souji with hopeful eyes," Okita-san, what you said last night...was it, was it true?".
He knew what she meant but as punishment for being alone with Sanousuke, he decided to tease her a bit. Souji pretended to not have a clue what she was saying,"Eh? I said a lot of things Chizuru. What ever could you mean?". He took three steps away from the well and turned around like a commanding officer, only with a smart ass smile.
Chizuru blushed almost a little bit annoyed, she knows he was teasing,"Okita-san please, you know what I am talking about". Souji held his chin in a thinking pose,"I do? Oh! That you can't wait to see me? Yeah I know it's true hehe".
She waved her hands in the air making signals,"Noo! That's not it..." she said quietly. Souji put his face very close to Chizuru's,"Then what is it Chizuru-chan?" he whispered, making her skin tingle.
She covered her face with both hands,"If Okita-san really does love me!". Souji thought she looked so cute when she was nervous and flustered, he grabbed both her wrists to pull her closer. "Why do you want know?" he said with a serious tone.
Chizuru looked away and blushed like the color of an apple, Souji could feel her hands shaking from the nerves...maybe he's going too far with his teasing after all. He was going to let go to give her some space, but then he heard the most sweetest and longed words ever.
"Because...because maybe...I, without realizing, fell love with Okita-san"
Souji's heart skipped a beat, no words were more beautiful than hers at this moment. He pulled her against his body and hugged her tight. The flushness of her cheeks felt warm on his chest, Souji brought up her face with his hand, "Then say my name if it's true".
Chizuru held her cheeks, trying to make his name roll off her tongue,"S...Ss...So...". He waited patiently hoping she could say it with no problem. "S...So...uj...Souji...-k-", as soon as he heard the 'k', he placed his finger on her lips,"Just my name, no kun, chan, san or tan. Say only my name".
Chizuru cleared her throat and looked at his twinklig green eyes"So-Souji...". He lowered his finger and held her head softly, "What about me, Chizuru?". She blushed trying to look away, but their eyes were locked together, "I...l-love...S-Souji".
After hearing those words, Souji smashed his lips against hers not wanting any space between their mouths. His kiss was rough but then tender, remembering she was still delicate. They broke the kiss, when they locked eyes again, shyed away and hid her face against his chest. Souji chuckled while holding her,"Why are you hiding? I also love Chizuru".
She peeked a brown eye up at him, Souji surprised her by kissing her eye ,"Oki...!". Chizuru stopped mid word, forgetting she was asked to say his name now. Souji's face also gave her the reminder,"Souji", she away her eye only to recieve another one on her left eye.
"Don't wipe away my kisses, that's rude" he pouted, Chizuru stood perfectly still so Souji can give her one more kiss. He chuckled as he gave her another bear hug.
His wolf started to whimper as his heart broke into pieces. He pushed her away from the beginning, since that night. Osamu felt as if he deserved having Chizuru taken away from him, both emotionally and physically. Of course somewhere in his gut he knew there was somthing between Chizuru and Souji, but along the way he hoped for it to disappear. They do have years of knowing eachother, while Osamu was just a memory of her tragic past. The pain and emptiness of his heart would be called abandonment, karma did get to him cruelly. (Chizuru, no, I'm suppose to be the one with you. I'll just kill him. Please don't leave me...we have to fix things. You belong to me. I love you) he whimpered louder, his cries threatened to be heard by them. Osamu lurked between the trees and bushes to look over Chizuru. As he felt the pain growing in his chest, he finally understood what Chizuru had felt when he walked away as she cried after him. The only difference is, Chizuru will always have someone on her side. Osamu will always turn in the direction of loneliness.