I will have the rest of the chapters posted soon.
Fortunate are those, who have a mother.
Maa, Mumma, Ammi.
The strongest of the women, carrying love as her fragrance, warmth on her lap, happiness in her palm. Holding us as the most beautiful human ever existing on the planet. Holding the thread of us in her hands, the same which had sewed our torn clothes. And maybe our broken hearts, our fallen confidence, and even our happiness.
Care reflecting in her harsh voice, hurt flashing in her eye which once had shine with anger, for raising her rough palm on us. The hands which cups our face, holding lines of cuts, holding lines of pain, but can she ever feel pain for herself. If only she gets time from worrying about us.
Mother. The warmth of our house, the voice of our house. The sound of her bangles, a lullaby saying how we are safe.
I poked my fingers on Veer's back, as he was facing away from me. Lying on the bed. I sat on the floor, trying to process what went wrong with my child, that he has went from being gleeful child to the one being quiet down.
"Veer what happened baby? Talk to Mumma." I whisper once again. Once again remembered by my own mother's memories. How she used to call me when I was upset over some matter. How badly I wanted to rest my head on her copious blossom, narrate everything that had pent in my heart. And strangely, every inch of the second I was getting reminded on the fact that how badly I had hurt them.
"Veer, until and unless you tell your Mumma what is troubling you how is she going to help you. You need to speak, meri jaan." I repeat the same line however, it was futile. He remained adamant in acting of sleeping. I sigh getting up, keeping the pillow on the bed, which was placed on my lap. I seat on the bed, squatting closer to him, as I snake my arms around his waist. Slowly, tentatively I began pulling him closer.
"Baby, what happened?"
"Nothing," he mumbles, his muscles tense with defiance.
With an exhausted sigh, with a gentle yet firm tug, I pulled him onto my chest, cradling him in my arms. His eyes flickered open, with a muffled protest he resisted. But I tighten my arms around him.
"You don't get to fight with your Mumma." I say with a chuckle enunciating in my throat, tightening my arms against him.
He remained silent. But when I start patting his head, his stiff muscles starts relaxing, starting to nestling against me, "Now, tell me what happened?"
"Nothing,"
"Really?" I kept moving my fingers through his hairs.
"Mumma," he speaks after few minutes.
"Yes," I look down at him, as he lifts his head. The doe eyes staring at me. I kiss his nose, "What baby?"
However, his eyes glistening with uncertainty, he shakes his head, "Nothing," again nestling his head in my neck.
"Are you having pain somewhere?" I ask, pushing my body a little, as i incline my back on the cushioned headrest.
"No," Veer mumbles, hiding his face from me, as though he will maintain a secrecy of the thoughts which roamed his mind like a black cloud.
"Veer, today you say a story, I will listen," I request him, stroking his hairs. He seats up, placing his legs on either side of me, as his eyes gleams, "Really?"
Perking my lips, I nods, coaxing my face with a layer of excited which was far away from my exhausted cells, yet to drift Veer's mind, I says, "Yes, today you say I am will be hearing,"
"Wait, I will bring my story book," he speaks speedily, about to get up, when I place my hand on his thighs stopping him, "No, you say any story which you remember,"
Veer keeps his fingers on his chin, thinking about any story which he remembered, "Monster and his lady?" he exclaimed, a dreamy glint taking over his. I comb the stray strands of his brown hairs, which fall on his eyes. I smile at him. How easily can a human mind be controlled? Easily, but done by those who has looked deeply in someone, so deeply that their soul is standing naked, their deepest secret spoken, their gestured calculated and made an overview of who they are. The real them, rather than the façade which is known by some and the image perceived by some.
"Maui said this story to me. I will say this story, okay?"
I, laugh matching up with his excitement, even though all I wanted was to put a sellotape on his mouth, "Okay,"
"Once upon a time, there was a monster."
"A monster?" I fake gasped. Its like an unspoken rule between our story time, to add background music for extra effect.
"Yes, a monster." Veer chimes, beginning, "A big, scary monster who lived deep in a dark forest." him widening his eyes in excitement, "He knew magic, and he was feared in the town by the people because they believed that he vanished people. People of the town were so scared that they outcasted him, told him to never enter the town. He was angry and left the town."
"Did he vanish people?" I interjected.
"Mumma, have patience."
"Sorry," I mumbled out.
"He was hungry and sleep. So, he decided to rest against a tree. He closed his eyes, and slept. But feeling a movement, he woke up. There stood an old man, dressed in black cloth, only half of his face was visible. The monster asked the stranger, "Who are you?" to which the stranger replies, "Your friend. I saw how you were pushed away by your own people." He forwarded his hands to the monster. Monster thought for a second and grabbed his hand, "You are here to help me?" The stranger smiled, "Yes, I am here to help you. I am giving you one wish, and a castle to live in, where you will find everything, from clothes to food. But the castle would be made of sand."
"Sand?" My brow pulls together.
"Yes, of sand. The castle was to be built of sand, and in a dark deep forest, where nobody dared to go, only fearless heart would dare to step in the forest."
"What does the monster wish?"
"He asked nothing, he told the stranger, 'I will ask for it when the right time comes.' The stranger smiled, 'Okay, but remember the castle will be envied by many, each day it will grow to be stronger, the moon will kiss its wall with glory and sun will make it appear like a mountain of gold. But not everyone will enter it.' The monster asked, 'Why?' the stranger laughed, 'What magic you possess?' Monster thinks whether to answer or not, but the stranger was no harm to him and trusting him, he said, 'Whoever I put my heart on, vanishes in the light of magic settled with in me. This is not magic, I am cursed.' The stranger held a soft look on his face, speaking, 'The thing which is meant for you will stay with you. The one who doesn't fears you, the one who looks at you boundless of your flaws and is ready....ready, uhmm,"
"To cross the line of wildness with you," I add, my heart pulled in a pained distress, some unwanted yet desired memories rushing in me, like a feather on fire. I am sure, Reyansh would be saying the same words. Given how many times he had said it out to me.
Veer's eyes glees, "Yes, but how do you know? Maui also said the same thing."
I, blinked at my eyes, removing the moist which sticked at the corner of my lids, stretching my lips to smile, "I had heard the story,"
"You know the story?"
"No, I have heard it half. Tell me what happens," I usher him, to continue.
"The monster didn't understand anything. The stranger was a mystery to him, and his words a riddle, 'The castle will be the most beautiful impression on eyes, but if someone enters the castle, they will see your real self.'; 'My real self?' the strangers bring out a mirror, and what the monster saw in it the most shocking realization. He saw a man having a rough face, long fangs, his eyes dark than the universe, scary like the depth of an ocean. Two horns settled on his head." and to put extra effect, Veer stick his two fingers out, placing on either side of his head, "That day he knew why people called him a monster. 'I am a monster?' he was in disbelief. The mysterious man shakes his head, 'You can throw this look away from you.'; 'If?' The stranger eyes hold a wicked smile, 'If only you complete your twenty-eight of your life in isolation, in the castle. You will remain in the castle for the whole restriction period and not cross the boundary. If you do so, the castle of sand will crumble. And?"
"And?"
"If someone leaves the castle. The castle is linked to your heart, and if that someone holds your heart and vanishes from your life the sandcastle will crumble in sand, and so will the boom it was built upon, will be lost among the cosmic stars, forever." The strangers voice turning serious, 'So, be caution of whom you let inside in the castle and to whom you give your heart.'" Veer finished the story.
"And, what happens later?" I raise her brow, ushering him to go ahead. But Veer pouts his lips, slumping his shoulder, he lays his head on my chest, "I slept by then,"
Holding back the urge to roll my eyes, I say holding back the tone of annoyance, "When, the story was getting interesting you decided to sleep." Veer giggled, "I wanted to listen what happens with the monster but I fall asleep."
"Well, the next time you meet your Maui, hear the full story from him, okay?" I kissed his head.
"Okay." Veer mumbled, surpassing a yawn. I pat his head, knowing how it lulls him to sleep.
A story of monster and his lady.
A castle of sand, the monsters heart connected to it. A boom or an echo of curse, wrapped in walls, dawning darkness. The monster was Reyansh and the lady? But was the story recited by Reyansh to Veer was it really theirs story? An illusion to many, what seen a nothing less than a mirage, what hear ignored by wise, ready to make their own story. However, when the reciter is the protagonist, someone who has faced more than which can be put in words, yet settled down to recite the tale. How can his story be ignored? For he is the reciter and for he is the manipulator and for he carries her in his heart. The castle of sand, was fallen.
But the monster was given one wish. The story was and would always be ruled by him.
. . . . . . . . .
"Veer, come on, be a good boy and have your milk," I repeat the same line I've been saying for the past ten minutes. Shifting the almost cold glass of Complain-mixed milk to my other hand, I tuck the unruly red strand behind my ears as I walk to where Veer has found refuge, behind the sofa, almost getting sandwiched between the wall and the sofa. How did he even get in there?
"No, Mumma," he whines, pouting, his doe eyes glimmering with light as he tries to convince me.
"Either you come out and drink your milk or get ready to be beaten," I warn him, narrowing my eyes.
"Mumma, I don't want to."
"I will count to ten," I say, only to watch him push his hips deeper into the narrow space between the sofa and the wall, "And also no TV for the week."
That stops him. Maybe he's accustomed to being spanked on his butt, as he's not swayed by that threat. But threatening him with no TV did work. His doe eyes widen, all the naughtiness and mischief vanishing, replaced by a look of alarm. A sense of danger sets in.
"You wouldn't," he gulps.
"One,"
"Mumma," he shrieks in disbelief.
"Two,"
"Time, please," he pleads.
I push back the urge to laugh, watching him struggle to get out, probably stuck. He tries pushing the sofa, his feeble small fingers exerting all the pressure his small body can muster, only to sigh in defeat. But he's Reyansh's son; how can he give up easily?
"Three," I say, putting him on high alert, watching him as he breathes in, trying to make some space to get out.
Before I could utter the next number, a hyperventilating Kabir dashes, more like runs, towards us. His hair pushed back, brows pulled into a distressed look, making him appear as if he just visited a morgue.
"Kiraz," he holds me by my shoulder, turning me to face him, almost digging his nails into my shoulder, "There," he breathes out.
"What?"
When his lungs get enough oxygen, not enough but just the necessary amount to enable him to speak, he utters, "There... outside... the man... went mad."
"Can you speak more clearly?" I enunciate.
"That man," he pauses again, looking straight into my eyes, as if expecting me to read his mind like a telepathist. Or maybe fearing my reaction.
"What man?" I scrunch my nose in confusion.
He shakes my shoulder, trying to convey the gravity of the situation that might have traumatized him, "Your man," he almost screams in frustration, causing me to scrunch my nose further. But his words don't escape my ears, instantly setting my heart racing as though competing in an Olympic event. I shake my head to only let the clouding thoughts of warning he had put on me, And about staying with me, don't nag around when I do something, clouds in me. Did he act so swiftly? Reyansh Rathore is not someone who hurls words carelessly. Yet, I had ignored him and his warnings.
"What about your man?" Veer questions, snapping me out of my thoughts. Did we just forget Veer was in the room, probably stuck or more like sandwiched between the sofa and the wall? I look at him, realizing he's peering at me with a curious eye, his small face scrunched with a hint of anger from the words "your" and "man."
"Come, I'll show you," Kabir drags me, "and Veer, don't watch TV."
Kabir must have lost some of his screws. I look over my shoulder, calling out, "Veer, watch TV until we come back."
Before I can say anything else, my friend drags me outside, not even concerned with my appearance. My messy hair bun, the long oversized maternity T-shirt probably with holes at the hem due to its age, and hands occupied with a glass full of chocolate milk. If it's Reyansh who has once again pulled a stunt, which I'm sure he has, he would surely be traumatized by seeing me like this, questioning his obsession over me.
Kabir throws open the front door, and the same shocked expression that was on his face before contaminates me. My eyes widen almost popping out of their sockets, mirroring the look of a cardiac arrest on Kabir's face. The wall that separated Nirvan and Hussain's house, once pristine, now bears the scars of its practical collapse. The once sturdy wall now half-broken and in disarray strikes me with a hundred volts of disbelief.
"Look at my wall," Kabir points out like Veer, who is complaining to me, taking me as a fairy God who will move her stick letting the sparkle float in the air, and bring the wall which was made of material which was supposedly bought from abroad in the condition which it was earlier.
A hard hammer hits the top of the wall, adding another layer of debris falling on the ground, along with what remains. I blink at the crooked shape of the wall, where a few workers keep hitting their hammers, carrying on the task of removing its existence. With each brick collapsing on the ground, it drops Kabir's blood pressure.
"What is this?" I thought my voice was loud, but it's drowned out by the sound of bricks falling and hammers hitting, swallowing my words. Another blow of the hammer on the cracked surface agitates the loose layer of three to four bricks, causing them to collapse vertically onto the ground, making me flinch and take a step back.
There he sat on a chair, arms crossed over his head, looking entirely relaxed. Not bothered by the dust in the air, and the sun rays directly falling on his face-a strikingly handsome face, having cuts sharp like a blade, settling at the jaw. His eyes, a deep shade of black, or midnight color of sky, held a glint of mischief as they meet my gaze. And my body didn't miss the enigmatic allure of his presence which caused a hurdle of butterflies to dance in my stomach. Their soft wings feathering the inside of my stomach, causing a glitter of feeling dance on my skin. And the look of his eyes, which settles on me, gliding slowly and lazily down the curves of my body, on my chest, stomach, my bare leg. As if he could see me my nude appearance through the clothes.
"Good morning, Bhabhi," my eyes dart towards his side, a cheerful Vedant waving at me as if we were long-lost friends. Right beside him was Vedansh, who, feeling my gaze on him, quickly stuffs the straw and starts sipping his juice.
I redirect my attention to Reyansh. Despite his relaxed posture, there's an intensity in his gaze that clenches my core.
"Kiraz," Kabir whispers my name from behind me, snapping me out of yesterday's dirty images. The position we were in, how I was grinding on him, ignoring the animosity between us, the grudges we hold, the hate he has for me, and the love I hold for him, only to let our lust-filled eyes lock. I shift uncomfortably.
"Kiraz, tell him to stop."
I look at Kabir, "Uhmm, yes," nodding as I clear my throat and move forward, but I hand Kabir the glass of milk and then shout out, "What are you doing?" with my hands on my hips.
"Removing the barrier between us." he smirks.
"And, your twisted brain is thinking the wall is the barrier between us?"
"Depends on which distance are you talking about. Physical or mental."
"Do you think it is time to joke and come up with crap twisted words while your men are destroying my private property."
"Only I have the right to destroy your private property, opps! My private property." He says nonchalantly treating his cousins and Kabir as a wallflower. Blood gushes to my cheeks. He is a father of a five years child yet he is acting like an immature kid, who can demand anything and get it.
"I am serious." I seethe in anger, "Tell your men to stop destroying the wall." I don't use, my wall.
"Do the work fast," instead he orders them the opposite of what I asked him.
My jaw clenched, "Reyansh Rathore, you can't be joking right now when your men have clear-cut decided to vandalize my wall. Tell them to stop. Do you even know from where did Kabir has got the materials,"
"Italy," Kabir vouch from back. And I hold back my urge to throw a rock right on his head.
"And India, had a scarcity of bricks or most probably rocks?" Reyansh cocked his brow at Kabir. Kabir seals his mouth.
Reyansh gets up from with his usual effortless grace, revealing his bare chest as he walked towards me. The muscles rippled beneath his bronzed skin, having a map of tattoos, speaking volumes of strength and vitality. As if he had not already wrapped himself in a hard shell which shines with an aura commanding attention, putting the other person in an unease position, then his walk is doing the best of it. I match his eyes, my chin high, which many people can't.
For the malice fire burning in his eyes, making him less humanly, can't be looked upon by many. I can, because long ago I have lost myself in them. By falling for a monster residing in him. On seeing him approaching, his men stopped their pursuit of demolishing my wall, taking a step back. And I must say that appeared a, sexy, move. I shake my head. I should probably think of ways of searching ways I could save Kabir's Italian style compound wall.
"Tell your man to stop destroying our wall,"
"Why do you think I should stop them?"
"Because the wall stands in my land. You hold no right in tampering with it."
"What if I say, I do hold a right. A right or what I prefer as a power where I could decide anything when the matter is solely related to you."
"You can't. You hold no right over me,"
"And who let Rayer to be opened."
I fall silent, but i can't let a smirk of victor take over him, "Rayer...is mine," the tone was supposed to be confident.
"Last time, I checked, the owner agreed to be running on my conditions, didn't she?"
"More like to be threatened."
He gasps, "Look at you putting the blame on me. When my motive was to use your weakness in my plot."
"Wasn't that enough, that you want to destroy the wall?" I cross my arms, "Now, what is your next demand?"
"Nothing much, just trying to remove barrier between two neighbors. On top, the wall was damn annoying. It blocked just a beautiful sight.....of your garden?" Did I just thought it was?
"Reyansh, stop this,"
"I just started. We have a long way to go." He tilts his head, his voice deep but at the end it goes low, "Don't interrupt my work, or the next wall be the wall of your house."
"Why are you doing this? What do you need from me, now? We have been separated Reyansh, since past five years. You hate me, I despise you. It's a dead end between us. We are a closed history. Reopening it, will only hurt us. Can't you forgo the madness and do both of us a favor and stop making me regret of fallin-" I stop, closing my eyes momentarily for having spoken something which was never meant to be out.
The playfulness from his dark eyes, vanishes away letting the speck of fury take over them, a vein pops on his throat, which jaw clenched, speaking of the sign of the hold back anger, "Do you love me? Or you regret falling for me?"
"I didn't mean it," I speak to be only cut off, "But I mean the question." He inches closer and glad the broken collapsed wall was between us, which stopped him from crashing me to his hard chest and demanding the answer of the question. Stopped him from touching me.
"Answer my question," he demands and the way he spoke the word, it is hard to think that he is going to drop the question.
"You tell me. What have you done since the time you came, other than threatening me, forcing me to do something I don't want. Five years ago, you crashed my choices, made me fall for someone who was never there or rather existed. This is the reason Reyansh, I hide Veer from you. Because I fear my son walks the steps of his father, and became someone who gives zero shit to other's emotions."
"Keeping him away from me, will not make him like me? He is my blood. What makes you this confident and say that he will be not like me. At the end, the apple doesn't fall far away from the tree."
"I will keep him away from darkness."
He smirks, "Fate, darling, fate. I didn't go willingly towards the darkness."
"You had found home in it, Reyansh. You can let go of the darkness when you had the chance still you didn't. Because, it just made your vision blur with ignorance that you were turning into monster. That provided you solace and that was also the reason why you love darkness and homed yourself in it."
"So easy to speak. Then five years ago why were you standing in the middle of your room with a decision which could wreck the lives of people who were attached with your life. Don't act, like you didn't let your demons win over you."
My lips trembled, a ball of bile forming in my throat, hard to ignore and hard to swallow. The memories like rain, gushing over us. My head was dizzy, as I keep my hands on his bare chest, feeling his skin, thinking it will snatch me away from the clutches of dark memories, "Don't...talk about that," my eyes were on the small crumbled stone, outcasted, fallen, imperfect.
A harsh touch of his palm, makes shivers run on my skin, and I let go of the breath, "Go inside." He speaks softly, but hidden with command.
"Don't do it, Reyansh."
"I will destroy the wall."
"It will not be good for us."
"Ever heard of the words, 'Even in destruction, there is a certain kind of elegance,' I will prevail it on us."
"The world outcasts such elegance," he brings his palm on top oh his chest, the surface, which hold his heart. And I almost melted by the soothing lub-dub, the lullaby of home.
"I will build our castle on the death bodies of the person who dares to look down on our destructed pieces." Was it supposed to make me better? Or an effect which makes my breath to be caught in my lungs, "You didn't mean it."
"I mean every word. I can kill for you Kiraz and that was itself a reason why we separated."
"Five years ago, you killed the man for me?" my knees were shaking as if it holds no power of its own. Like the way we were drawing closer to each other.
A small mirthless smile takes over him, a mocking one to be precise for my innocent brain. The monster in him, looking down at me, given me every reason to shiver, back away, run away, but also a reason to stay and listen to his cruelty. He was true when he said, If I can send his demons to sleep, then I also hold the power of summoning them.
If I look now, deeply, he never lied any word. Except his identity. Not a word. He was raw honest but hiding a part.
"You wouldn't able to handle the truth,"
"Try for once."
"You wouldn't run away?" he challenges me.
"No,"
"What do I get in return if I say the truth,"
"Anything which will make you happy,"
"A kiss?"
"The truth?"
"Damn, I should have asked for your cunt to bury my cock," he tsked with regret.
"Dream high," I roll my eyes. His eyes flashes with mischief, "Let me give you a reason to roll your eyes."
I push his chest, "The truth."
"I killed him not for you. I killed him, shred his skin, chopped his hands, plucked his eyes out, smashed his head, for he dared to think he could harm something I love. He dared to think he will snatch you away from me. Where the bastard was thinking of sending you, I sent him there. I will send everyone who will think of hurting, my lady. It is not your fault. It is the fault of the feeling I hold for you. The obsessive, fucking fuck feeling, which makes me feel the heart which I thought I was devoid of. And do you know, who licked his blood."
"Who?"
"Hunter."
Reyansh Rathore is a dark soul, an enigmatic mysterious aura. A very dark soul. He has a heart, like you and me. Blood pumps in it, like you and me. Yet, Reyansh Rathore is not like you and me. He is a morally grey character in my story, his soul black, holding homage to all the bad souls of the underworld. Emotions are not for him, or he just doesn't know what they are. A monster resides in him, making him hollow. He is not a man who can be loved. He is a stain on the world. A disastrous effect the demons had created to take revenge on the world.
I still love him. Unconditionally.
Who should be checked?
Me or him.
"Go inside. I wouldn't be giving away my lottery ticket of kissing you now. Not when you are checking your sanity for loving me," he smiles. The smile which speaks millions, but only gives you one indication. Danger.
I was just too late to understand him.
When I think I know him, I just turn out to be the biggest fool.
••~•~•~•~•~••
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Next update: Thrusday
Published: 3May, 2024.