Will's tour of the Unicorn started early the next morning. After breakfast Tyne sent the other officers to their posts while he escorted Will and Nettles. Will kept quiet mostly, only asking a question every now and then. But he observed everything, even things that Tyne probably didn't notice. He kept notes mentally of things that needed to be attended to, from ways to store supplies in the pantries to better methods for transporting the coal in the engine rooms.
It was in the magazine of the first turret they visited that he spoke up. "What is this dust?"
Tyne scuffed the white dust with his shoe, "Comes off the cordite, sir. But it's all perfectly safe, no chance of it lighting itself on fire like powder would."
"It's still dust from an explosive substance." Will sniffed, "Is it anywhere else onboard?"
"Anywhere we use the cordite, sir. Magazines, turrets, and the gunners probably track some with them when they leave."
Will frowned. "I'll be having the ship cleaned from stem to stern after this, but first all of this cordite dust will be removed. Have the gun crews attend to it immediately."
The gunnery officer, Ives, who had joined them for this section, pursed his lips. "Sir, surely it's better for us to be ready at a moment's notice than worried about keeping things spit shined?"
"If you get into the habit of cleaning, then it hardly takes any time at all." Will sighed, "Blame it on my sailing liners if you like, but I keep a clean ship. Have your men clean this magazine, the turrets, anywhere the cordite dust might be and dispose of it." Seeing that Ives was still a bit miffed over it, Will tried a joke to lighten the mood. "It's not as if I'll be having the engineers scrub the coal clean before it's burned, and I'll help sweep it up if needed."
Ives chuckled and relaxed a bit, "I think my men can handle it sir. We'll have it finished by the time you come back from seeing the Admiral."
Will nodded, following Tyne as he moved on to the upper portion of the turret. If there was any place that Will didn't want to be during combat, it was the magazine. Trapped underneath all those decks, surrounded by explosives, it was enough to make him shiver. The sailors who were down there, as well as the Marines that Tyne had mentioned crewed an entire aft turret themselves, were braver than he was.
Tyne offered to have the men run a drill for him, to show how the turret's charges and shells were hoisted up and loaded, but Will shook his head. He knew how the guns functioned, and the men would be running drills soon enough. They would have plenty of exercise. Tyne was surprised when Will asked to walk through the sailor's quarters, their mess, their kitchen, and then back to the Marines quarters. While Will didn't turn out every sailor's hammock, he did look a great deal.
The Unicorn's crew had grown rather lax over their time without a captain. Will wasn't going to crack the whip and start flogging men for having their belongings not properly stowed, but he would insist on things being clean and orderly. It not only would make it easier during combat to know where everything was, and he had found men worked better when they had a clean environment. Some of the men grumbled about it, but no one actively fought against his orders to begin cleaning and he left the ship to Nettles while he went to present his plan to Admiral Huntington for his approval.
The Admiral was back behind his desk, although he stood when Will entered. "And how do you find your ship, Captain?"
"In need of some cleaning, but I feel good about her." Will chuckled, "I'll have her shaped up in no time."
"And I take it you have a plan for that." Huntington sat, gesturing for Will to do the same. "Would you care to share it?"
Will nodded after he had sat, "I want to take her out for a week's cruise, along with some of the destroyers here. I'll have the men act as if we were headed to battle the entire time, and the destroyers will tow targets for the guns. Target practice every day, drill, allowing the engines to run, I think it would be good for not only the ship but the crew to be exposed to what's expected of them for an extended time."
Huntington pursed his lips. "It's not a bad idea, and the destroyers will of course escort you. How soon were you wanting to leave?"
Will shrugged, "As soon as I can, the men should be used to having to rush out."
"I'll have the destroyers coaled and ready to leave on the morning's tide." Huntington nodded, "I want status reports sent at noon and midnight each day to ensure that we haven't lost you."
"Of course, sir."
"Oh, and I forgot this yesterday." Huntington grinned, "In recognition of your promotion, you've been granted two weeks of leave. When would you care to take it?"
Will's heart leapt. His meeting with Ana wouldn't be a quick bedding in a hotel room, he'd have her in his own bed, in his home. "I should like it to start on the eighth sir, my wife is coming over from New York and I should like to surprise her in Liverpool."
"Well, aren't you the lucky one?" Huntington scratched out the dates on the paper in front of him, "You'll have all the fellows jealous. I'll have this waiting for you when you get in, you'll be glad for it after a week's cruise at battle readiness."
Will saluted before he left, stopping briefly at the aide's desk. Telegram forms were stacked on the edge of it, and the aide allowed Will to take several. They'd be taken to the civilian offices to be sent out later. Will quickly wrote out messages for his father, Peg, Lights, Sylvie, and even Sam, telling them that Ana was coming to visit. He included a note to his father that he hoped he could come visit while she was here.
He was still grinning to himself over the thought of everyone coming down to see Ana when he got back to the ship. Tyne was immediately by his side, although the lad fairly goggled when Will made his way to the bridge, shed his jacket, and picked up a rag to begin dusting the place. Considering that the Unicorn hadn't been out for quite some time, there was rather a lot of it.
Will cocked an eyebrow when Tyne babbled something about him not needing to clean, that it was beneath his dignity. "Lad, I came up from a deckhand on one of my father's ships. I've cleaned before, besides this is my ship too."
"But your rank-"
"Doesn't preclude me from following my own orders." Will swept the rag across the face of the wheel, then proceeded to wind it around each spoke to clean them. "Why don't you go see how the cleaning is going elsewhere? I'll have this place and the chartroom cleaned by the time you get back."
Will found that he did enjoy the work of cleaning, it was simple and straightforward. Things were dirty, disordered and needed to be put to rights. It made him feel accomplished to look back at everything he had done and see that he had left it better than he had found it.
By the time Tyne returned, the bridge was clean, the chartroom organized and Will had donned his jacket again. That seemed to set the lad at ease, although he had an amused look on his face. "Sir, Lieutenant Ives has a question for you, he's down on the dock."
Will gestured for Tyne to follow him, and found it was not only Ives waiting for him. Ives's men, the Marines from their turret, and quite a few of the crew and officers were clustered around. Even more of the men hung on the railing of the deck, watching the goings on. Will nodded to Ives when he saluted, "Well Mr. Ives, it appears you've quite the crowd."
"Sir," Ives stepped aside, revealing several buckets filled with white dust. "We've swept up the cordite dust as you've asked. Some of the men had an idea on how to dispose of it."
"And that would be?"
"We want to see if it burns, sir." One of the gun crew spoke up, quickly echoed by the others.
Will looked to the buckets, filled to the brim. "Dump it out on the docks, in a flat layer, and run a fuse to it. No one will be close to it in case it catches."
"Aye, sir." Ives set to ordering his men around, and shortly a portion of the paved dock was covered in the cordite dust. A fuse was brought, and Will himself lit it. The anticipation of the crowd was more than evident as the fuse slowly burned through. For a moment, Will was concerned that the dust wouldn't ignite, but then it caught in a rush of flames.
Will was not the only one who jumped back from it, Ives and several of the other gunnery men started as the cordite burned merrily on the dock until it consumed itself and was extinguished. A few men filled the buckets with seawater and tossed it over the remains while Ives turned to him, "I won't allow a speck of dust in any turret sir, you have my word. Not in the magazines, not in the hoists, nowhere onboard."
Mr. Keller was wrong, the first one to come after me for my plan to visit Will was not Mother, it was Ezekiel. He tore into my office not a day after I had booked the tickets, his face flush. "What the hell are you doing, Annie?"
I looked up from my desk. "I'm signing contracts, like I do almost every day, Zeke."
"You're going to Britain." He spat, throwing himself into the chair across from me.
"You do it all the time."
"I do it in an American flagged ship, and I still post triple the number of lookouts for U-boats." He fumed silently for a moment. "You're putting yourself in danger."
"I'm being as careful as I can." I muttered, bringing my fingers up to rub my temples. "Boat deck cabin, fastest ship I can find, hell Zeke, I'll keep my lifebelt on the side of my bed if that's what it takes."
"I'd rather you sleep in a lifeboat." He grumbled, "What are you going to tell your mother?"
"That I want to see my husband."
He rolled his eyes, standing. "She's going to strangle you." I snorted, and threw the lock on the door after he left. It wasn't as if he was the only one that was angry over my leaving, for when I got home and asked Peggy to pack a trunk for me, she dug her heels in.
"Ma'am, I'm not doing that." She slapped her hands against her apron as we walked through the halls. "Your mother, and even your father, would never want you to put yourself at risk like this."
I pursed my lips, "Peggy, I've already heard that from two other people, and I have no doubt there will be more."
"Because you're thinking foolishly! Wouldn't Mr. Murdoch want you to stay safe?"
"He's the one who asked me to come." I stepped through the door to my dressing room, spotting my steamer trunk in a corner. "Now, will you and Louise pack my trunk for me or am I going to have to do this myself?" Peggy stood there, silent. I knelt down, unbuckling the latches and tossing open the lid. "You know I hate to order you Peggy, I really do. But I am going to see Will, even if I have to pack my own clothes."
Her voice was quiet, "Are you taking Louise?"
"No, I'm trying to travel light so I can get to him quickly."
"Then let me pack." She sighed, walking to a wardrobe and throwing it open. "Because if you're travelling light then that means no gowns, no jewels, and you'll be lucky if I add in a hat for you."
"I'm going to take Rigel as well," I stepped up behind her, hugging her. "Thank you, Peggy, I appreciate it."
"Go on, leave this to me." She shook me off, focused on the clothes. "You'll need to make a few calls to let your friends know you're leaving."
The next day I visited the Moodys, and Liz had made sure to have Oscar brought over. I sat in her new parlor, with its perfect pale pink wallpaper and spring light streaming through the windows. A tea service, part of her wedding china that I had contributed to, lay untouched between all of us. I glanced around them, finally settling on looking at James when I spoke. "I'm going to be leaving for a little while."
"Your cabin?" James cocked his head, "I imagine it would be beautiful in spring."
I shook my head, "I'm going to Britain, to see Will."
"What?" Oscar started to his feet, "You've seen the papers, Anastasia! The Germans basically said they're going after any ship, Christ, they've fired on American ships!"
"I'll be taking a passenger liner, the Lusitania." I summoned a small smile. "Why would they attack her? She's going to be carrying more people than cargo."
Liz shifted in her seat. "Oscar, you know cousin Alfred is taking the same ship. You didn't have this extreme of a reaction to him."
"We all know cousin Alfred makes foolish decisions." He raked a hand through his curly brown hair. "But Anastasia, why are you being so stupid?"
"I'm not." I snapped, reaching for the teapot. "I'm taking every precaution I can. It's not as if I'm going to France for the front lines. Liners have kept going since the war started, I'll just be another passenger."
"You were once before." James mumbled, and I had to look away when Liz reached out to take his hand.
I sipped my tea, trying to temper my voice. "Then the odds should be in my favor, I've already been through that. So, it's unlikely to happen again."
Liz nervously picked at her pale yellow chiffon skirt. "Have you told anyone else?"
"Ezekiel, and our manager here." I picked up a cookie to nibble on. "I've sent a card around for Sophie to come calling tomorrow to let her know, and of course I told the staff."
Oscar raised an eyebrow. "And your mother?"
"I'm saving her for last." I sighed, "I'll go over in a day or two. She's going to be furious, so I may as well wait."
"You're underselling it." He shook his head, "She's going to tie you up and keep you home." I looked away, my stomach twisting around itself at his words. I didn't want Mother to hate me for leaving, but I had to. I wanted her to send me off with her best wishes, to tell me that she'd be there waiting for me when I returned. The rest of the visit passed in a tense silence, only a few more words from each of us as we all tried to avoid the subject of my visit.
Liz and James offered their best wishes when I hugged them goodbye, and Oscar walked me to the door. He paused though, gripping my hand tightly. "Anastasia, please, stay." He looked down, his eyes bright. "Please stay for me, you know how I worry about you."
I squeezed his hand. "Oscar, I've only stayed this long because Will asked me to. And now he's asking me to come visit him. I won't be gone for long, I'll be back next month." He looked up and I gave him a smile, "I'll be counting on you to tell me all the gossip, you know."
"You'll be spending all night over here while Liz and I bring you up to speed." He leaned down, pressing a kiss to my cheek. He lingered there for a moment, his voice low. "Anastasia, you have to come back. New York isn't the same without you."
I shivered, "I'll be back before you know it, Oscar. Now, I do need to go home. I have things to arrange before I leave." Lewis was silent on the drive home, as were the servants when I arrived. Mrs. Vangerten even sent up a cold dinner, and Louise hadn't made the bed. Peggy's anger was clearly evident in the other staff, although they at least put out a decent, and warm, spread for Sophie when she arrived.
She'd left Adam at home, and even though I had told her it would only be me, she still looked a bit disappointed to not find Morris. She stirred a lemon into her tea, "You look tired."
I fought back a yawn, "I'm leaving town soon, so I've been having to set things up to keep moving while I'm gone."
"Where are you headed?" She smiled, "I had a wonderful time in Florida, I could give you the name of the hotel if you like."
I shook my head, chuckling. "I'm afraid I'm headed somewhere a bit colder. Will wants me to come see him in Britain, I'm off for the Lusitania in a little while."
"Oh, how wonderful!" Sophie grinned, "You must be so excited."
"I am, although I seem to be the only one." I shrugged, "Everyone is worried about crossing into the war zone."
She worried her lip, her tea forgotten. "I can understand that if you were on a British cargo ship, but taking a passenger liner is safe. My countrymen's honor hasn't sunk low enough to attack a ship carrying women and children."
"And I am grateful for that." I reached over and squeezed her hand. "Still no word?"
Sophie shook her head, her pale blonde hair loose around her face. "No, but I pray every morning and night for their safety. I know if anything happened that I would feel it."
"I hope they're safe." I spoke softly, "No matter what you hear about me supporting the British, I don't have any hatred for your family."
"Oh, I know." She squeezed my hand. "Just as I know that you know I have no hatred for Will." Sophie summoned a smile, clearly changing the subject. "Now, however am I to meet with Morris while you're gone?"
"Well, I am going to see my mother tomorrow and was going to speak with her on it." I smirked, "Although I'm not sure if she'll be as indulgent as I was the last time you two met. My housekeeper told me you two were in one of the guest rooms for hours."
She blushed, "We lost track of time, I'm afraid. Thank you again for taking care of Adam for so long."
"My mother did most of it." I sighed, "She loves that boy. I just wish she had a grandchild of her own to play with."
"Perhaps when you come back you'll be getting one ready." Sophie teased, and we both fell into giggles. I wanted to ask her how Morris was as a lover, but then I knew she would ask about Will and I was not going to discuss that. I dreamed about it plenty, his hands on my body once again, his lips against mine as we moved together. I wanted him, badly, and knew I would give myself away if we got to talking about it.
It was hard to ignore when it was so close to reality, although it was far from my mind when taking the car over to my mother. Rigel was coming with me, as a distraction. He had no clue when I was anxiously petting him, or why I gripped his leash a bit tightly when I got out. Mr. Rigby's face was impassive as he lead me to the parlor.
Mother sat with impeccable poise in her chair, an open one across from her clearly waiting for me. I sat down, arranging my skirts and letting Rigel off his leash. He was well trained enough to not make a mess of things. "Mother, how are-"
"When were you going to tell me?" Her voice was deadly cold. "Just before you boarded or were you going to send a wire once you'd left?"
I flinched, "That's why I'm here."
"Honestly, when Mr. Keller told me, I thought he was joking. I thought there was no way my daughter would do something so foolish." She drew in a breath, "But then I heard it from Ezekiel, and Oscar came here in a terror and almost started weeping on the sofa. Anastasia, you cannot just rush off like this!"
"But he wants me there!" I cried, feeling a sob building up in my throat. "He wants me there, and I haven't seen him for so long. Mother, you know how much I love him!"
I could see her doing her best to control her tongue. "And you know how much I love you. I am not going to throw my daughter into a war zone. Your family is here, Anastasia, as are your friends, and you are abandoning us. None of us want to see you hurt, not again."
"Mother," I swallowed the sob, hoping that the quiver of emotion in my voice would die with it. "I'm doing this as safely as I can. I need to see him, just for a little while. I'll be back home before you know it."
"Or you'll be dead." She spat, standing and sending Rigel scurrying out of her way. "And I'll be alone."
I followed her, wrapping my arms around her while I rested my head against her back. "You're not alone, Mother."
"If I lose you, I may as well be." She sounded bitted, but her hand came up to cover mine. "Anastasia, I cannot bury you too."
"You won't." I swore, coming around. "I promise Mother, that I will come back. I won't abandon you." My mind turned, trying to find some idea that would prove my words. I had every intention of coming back, of seeing all of them again. My fingers ran down the chain of my necklace, wrapping around the ship's wheel pendant. I pulled it from my bodice, "Will asked me to wear this when I think of him, I haven't taken it off since he left. Give me something like this, I'll wear it until I'm home and I can return it."
Mother stared at the small silver pendant, tears in her eyes. "Anastasia, sweetheart, please. Just stay."
"I can't, but I won't abandon you."
She sighed, a slight laugh in it. "You always were a stubborn child." She lifted her hands, working at a silver amethyst ring on one of her fingers. It slid off, and she held it out. "Here, from me. But wait a moment, I'll be right back."
I cradled the ring in my palm as she left the room. It was a darling little ring, and I remembered seeing it on her finger quite often as I grew up. I had no doubt Father had given it to her, that seemed to be the way with most of her jewels. I only set the ring down to unclasp my necklace, my skin shivering as I lifted it off. It felt odd not to have its small weight around my neck, but I needed a way to keep the ring with me.
Mother came back in as I was sliding the ring onto the chain down to rest by the pendant. "You, you took it off."
"I did, just for a moment." I smiled, holding it up so she could see the ring strung on it. "See? Now I'll always be thinking of you, too."
"And your father." She stepped up, gently taking one side of the chain and opening her other hand. A pair of Father's cufflinks, engraved gold, rested in them and she slowly worked the fine chain of the necklace through the chain of the cufflink. They slid down to rest on the other side of the wheel. "You'll have both of us with you." She gestured for me to turn around, her fingers lifting my hair and clasping the necklace around my neck.
I pressed my fingers to the pendant and its accompaniments. "Thank you, Mother."
"I want a wire from you every day at noon." She busied herself with picking at my hair as she adjusted my hairstyle. "And one when you get to Liverpool, and another when you get to Southampton. You'll be sending me one a day until you come back, and you'll be coming back on one of our ships too."
I let her fuss over me, enjoying the feeling of someone who cared about me. It was something I'd missed with Will being gone, even if it did come with a lecture on exactly how careful I was to be. I let her do as she liked, even keeping me for diner where she promised to allow Sophie and Morris to meet at her house, so long as she got to see Adam while they were there. I hugged her tightly when I left. She did the same, holding me for far longer than she usually did. "I love you, Anastasia."
"I love you too, Mama." I whispered, feeling her start when I said that. "And I'll be back as soon as I can."
I kept finding myself touching the new additions to my necklace, even when I lay in bed. I had all of them with me now in this way, all of my family. I couldn't help but smile a bit at it, although when I stirred in the middle of the night that was far from my first thoughts. Father sat on the edge of my bed, looking for all the world like he wanted a whiskey. He gave me a soft smile when I sat up, "You're hurting her more than you know."
I ducked my head. "I don't mean to."
"Still, Anastasia, just stay home." He turned, reaching for my hand. It felt the same as it always had, warm and solid with the skin slightly rougher than my own. "Stay here where you're safe. I'm sure I can have word brought around about William, even if it takes awhile."
I held his hand tightly. "Papa, please, not you too."
"I don't want you joining me." He shook his head, "Don't you care about that?"
"I do," I admitted, it was hard not to think about the possibility of dying when everyone seemed so sure that it would happen. "But I also care about Will."
"You're both safe, just let things continue as they are."
"Papa, you know that can't happen." I shook my head, "Otherwise the war would never have happened and as much as I want to, I can't stop it myself. I want this change, unlike that one." I bit my lip, sighing. "I worry that if I don't see him, I might go back to the way I was after he left. It's been nine months, Papa. I don't want it to be a year or more."
He leaned down, resting his head on mine. "Sweetheart, you have to be the one to prevent that. It only comes on you when you allow it."
I jerked away at that. "Papa, I can't control that. It's not as if I can stop myself from missing him."
"You write him every day."
"But I haven't heard his voice or seen him!" I tried to resist crying again, feeling a tear. "I need to see my husband, and he wants to see me. Isn't that enough?"
"But everyone here-"
"Is still in my thoughts." I cut him off, pulling my necklace out. "Look, Mother's ring and your cufflinks. I have the both of you with me."
He stared, bringing his fingers up to brush against the cufflinks. "Anastasia, you're dead set on this aren't you?"
"Yes." I glanced down to the cufflinks, "Will they help you visit me, somehow? You could come visit me in Britain and come back to tell Mother everything."
He smiled wistfully. "They will certainly make it easier. Although I would prefer you to stay, there's something coming, I can feel it."
"Ghosts can tell the future?"
"Not exactly, but we can feel things coming." He shrugged, "It's not exact, and oftentimes it comes to nothing. But if something important is about to happen, it's like a chill down our spines."
I considered that for a moment, "Could it just be the war that's upsetting things?"
"Probably, I certainly haven't gone a day without feeling it since it started." He took my hand again, "Just, if you have to go, just be careful, sweetheart."
"You're not the only one telling me that, Papa." I teased, although I did kiss his cheek and hold him close. "But I will be, and I will be home soon."