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THE NIGHT WAS ALWAYS GOOD FOR A MOMENT ALONE WITH YOUR THOUGHTS. FOR SHADOW, life had always been a curious little thing, growing up on an island full of dangerous assassins tends to make you paranoid and a pessimist. But she'd never admit it.
For as long as she had known she was trained to kill and follow commands. But her wretched little heart wasn't in it. Not completely. It never had been.
But alas what can one do when he is bound by circumstances and fate; Lay awake at night staring at the pages of some torn book she'd taken a fancy to reading recently. Much of herself didn't make sense to her. Where she came from or who she was. Unanswered question piling up and making her head spin.
Having no sense of whatever she had felt everyday had only become worse the minute she started aging, with age came a sense of both wisdom and understanding.
She wished it didn't.
It was terrible, awful and every other adjective one could use to describe a negative, bad thing. Walking along the shore of the island at night would be a frightening idea to those unaware of what lurked in the bushes but she wasn't afraid. It was peaceful. The water near her legs and the sound of the waves hitting the shore. The island had always been beautiful at night. The fine grains of time slipped through her fingers as she wandered the vast space of her mind. Wandering, as one might know, was an entirely different matter from drowning.
Oh how easy it would be to drown in the sea and never look back. She had nothing and there was no one she'd be leaving, it would all be so much easier. But there are two ways one lives, the easy way or the right way. Both unquestionably out of reach for her. But the thought had been nice. For a while at the very least.
But she'd never truly find in life all that she yearned for. No purpose. No hope. Her loyalties surrendered to a side she was slowly growing tired of, finding excuses to support its baseless claims of making society better through adverse measures.
She honestly called bullshit.