---------- Chapter 35 -----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Haden pulls away from me, his pretty grey eyes staring at me intently. And I still don’t know how to react.
“I’m making you uncomfortable, aren’t I?” he asks after a moment.
“A little,” I admit. “Haden...I do love you. But-”
“I get it,” he mumbles, cutting me off. He stands up and walks back into the hall, his shoulders hunched slightly. He’s really upset over this, isn’t he?
What do I do?
You love Haden. If you allow yourself, you could easily fall in love with him
But he’s like your brother! How sick are you?!
“Shut up,” I whisper to myself hoping the little voice would just disappear. I need to think.
I chug down the rest of the vile concoction Haden passed to me. Courage. That’s what I need. I keep repeating that to myself as I head into the hall, after Haden.
The dance is still in full swing. Everyone’s dancing or snapping photos or just hanging around with friends. I can see Alex on the dance floor with a pretty red head clinging onto him. He looks bored though.
Shaking my head to stop all the distractions, I scan through the crowd, trying to spot Haden. And then I finally find him. He’s at the far end of the hall, talking intently to Matt.
I take a deep breath and manoeuvre around the crowd till I get to where they’re standing. With another deep breath, I tap Haden on his shoulder. He whirls around to face me. His curiosity turns to surprise when he sees me.
“You haven’t danced with me yet,” I murmur.
Haden grins, and takes my hand. He leads me over to the centre of the dance floor and rests his arms on the small of my back. I lock my wrists behind his neck and stare up at him uncertainly. I’m intensely aware of how close we are. I can even smell his sweet breath.
“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have kissed you. Can we pretend it didn’t happen?” he asks, as he leads me in the dance.
“What if I don’t want to pretend it didn’t happen?” I ask.
“I don’t get it. You were completely appalled at what I did. I know you were,” he mumbles.
“I wasn’t,” I contradict. “I’m just not sure, Haden. I don’t want to lead you on. You mean too much to me. I just need some time to think. Is that okay with you?” I ask softly.
“Jessica, I’ve waited seven years. I can wait some more. Take all the time you need. And even if you don’t feel the same way...don’t feel bad. I am, first and foremost, your guardian,” he whispers, leaning his cheek against the top of my head. I smile contentedly against his chest.
“Look at Haden and Jessica!”
“Aren’t they siblings?”
The whispering gets louder and louder, but Haden just ignores it. My cheeks are burning though. Of course this would look weird! Everyone thinks he’s my older brother. Somehow I don’t think brothers and sisters dance quite like this.
“Ignore them,” Haden whispers, sensing my discomfort.
I fidget a little. “Don’t you care that they’re talking about us?” I ask softly, keeping my face buried in his chest so I don’t have to see who is whispering.
“Why would I? I don’t even know them,” he answers simply, dipping me.
He releases me and I step away. I feel a pang at the sudden distance, but try my best to ignore it. My face is burning! Everyone is staring...
Haden takes my hand and leads me back to the far end of the hall. I think he was worried to leave me alone. I suppose I kinda looked like a deer caught in the headlights.
“Ignore them,” he repeats.
I nod my head, just to appease him. But he’s right. Why should I care what others think, right?
“Ladies and gentlemen, we’ve come to the highlight of our little dance; the best dressed nominees. So let’s have Haden Carter, Mathew Brian, Alexander Smith, Nick Andrews and Michael Morris up on stage for the guys. As for the ladies, let’s have Katherine Elliot, Amanda Smith, Chantelle Adams, Stacy Hurley and Jessica Aubry on stage,” Kenneth, the emcee, calls from behind his podium.
I follow the guys onto the stage embarrassedly. There are cat calls and whistles and clapping and whole lot of glaring. Darn it! I wish I was watching the guys on stage and not on stage myself.
“Okay beautiful people, I’ve got the votes in and two of you are about to be named the best dressed or rather most popular, wouldn’t you agree?” Kenneth calls to the cheers of the rest of the school in the hall.
“So this is a no brainer, sorry guys, but Haden Carter, you win!” he shouts. More cheers, and Haden grinning happily. The rest of the guys leave the stage, so now it’s Haden and us five girls on stage. “Ladies, it was a real close one, but Amanda Smith, you win!”
Amanda looks really good. I can’t grudge her the win. I do, however, dislike the way she’s eyeing Haden. I mean, I know I haven’t decided anything yet...but still!
“Okay, let’s let the sexiest students have the dance floor to themselves!” Kenneth encourages. Haden takes Amanda’s outstretched hand and leads her down the stairs and to the dance floor.
And then they start dancing. Haden’s being perfectly gentlemanly and stuff, but I think Amanda may be liking it a little too much. She’s got her face buried in the crook of Haden’s neck. And I notice gleefully, that Haden seems slightly uncomfortable.
“She’s so close to Haden’s neck, I’m starting to wonder if she’s a succubus,” Alex murmurs to Matt, chuckling.
“Well, I think we can safely add another name to Haden’s extremely long list of fans, don’t you agree Jess?” Matt asks.
“Totally agree,” I mumble. I honestly don’t know if I’m jealous or not. I mean, I don’t like him dancing with her...but I don’t feel mad or anything. It’s more like I think he doesn’t belong with her.
The song winds to a close and the moment the final note resounds, Haden immediately lets go of Amanda. He walks back to me and puts the sash he got around me instead. “You’re the most beautiful person in this room. You deserve this,” he murmurs casually, shrugging in response to my questioning look.
Matt nudges Alex and the both of them share a meaningful look before Matt clears his throat. “Hey, I just realised we’ve got two cars. Alex and I want to hit the theatres. Would you mind riding with Haden, Jess?” he asks innocently.
“Of course not,” I murmur, smiling slightly.
The two of them make a quick escape and soon it’s just Haden and I standing in the corner of the hall while the people around us continue the dancing.
“Hey Haden!” Amanda sing-songs, trotting over to us. “Dance with me?”
“Oh. I’m not really the dancing type, Amanda. Sorry,” he murmurs politely.
“Nonsense! You dance so well! Once more. Please?” she basically begs. Haden throws me a look, as if asking for permission and I shrug my shoulders. He doesn’t need to ask me.
“Fine. One dance,” he mumbles, leading her back to the dance floor.
“I don’t think I’ve ever seen you watch your brother so hungrily. Is this something new?” Reid asks, walking up to me.
“I don’t know, honestly. He isn’t my brother. It wouldn’t be wrong for me to admire his good looks. He is handsome...but I don’t know,” I whisper. “Besides, you aren’t exactly one of my favourite people,” I admit.
“Why?” he asked, his tone surprised.
“I found what you said earlier rather rude. I thought we were friends. Friends don’t talk to friends like that,” I inform him.
“Well, better I tell you than you carrying on the way you are. Besides, I never meant to hurt your feelings,” he whispers, watching Amanda and Haden intently.
“You mentioned batting for the other team, right? Do you by any chance happen to have a crush on any one of my guardians?” I ask awkwardly.
“Yeah, not awkward at all Jess,” Reid answers sourly. “You know, I think Amanda is head over heels for Haden.”
“It sure seems that way,” I mumble back.
“You don’t seem thrilled. So is it safe to assume you’re jealous?” he probes bluntly.
“I’m not jealous. I just think Haden could do much better. Besides, look at him. He’s so unbelievably uncomfortable,” I murmur, my eyes drinking in Haden’s appearance. His arms are stiff and he’s leaning as far away from Amanda as possible without being too obvious. “This is an incredibly long song,” I mutter.
“It’s an instrumental. Some go on for well past 5 minutes,” Reid informs me.
“Not gonna happen,” I murmur, walking towards the DJs booth. “Hey!” I call over the music. He turns to face me questioningly. “Some of the kids are complaining that you’re playing too many old time songs. Do you mind playing something more now? Faster, louder...you know the drill,” I encourage, flashing him a well practiced smile.
He nods his head in understanding and immediately a Chris Brown song booms through the speakers. I head back to my little corner, faking complete innocence. To my relief, Haden’s disengaged himself from Amanda and is striding purposefully towards me.
“I owe you a thank you,” Haden whispers to me, a knowing look on his face.
“I haven’t a clue what you mean,” I murmur, keeping up with my innocence pretence.
“Do you feel like staying? We could blow this joint? Take the party somewhere else?” he suggests softly.
I nod my head in acceptance and take his outstretched hand. “Jessica!” Stacy’s horribly nasal voice calling my name stops me from leaving the room on Haden’s arm.
“Where are you going?” she demands.
“Oh. I’m kinda tired,” I lie easily.
“I heard Haden say you guys are going to continue the party somewhere else,” Amanda accuses sourly. “Can we come?”
I turn to Haden for support, but he merely shrugs his shoulders, already 50% colder than he was earlier.
***
In the end, Amanda, Stacy, Kimberly and Reid decided to join us along with another one of my classmates, Eric. The seven of us headed to the Laguna, a trendy nightspot.
“Jessy!” Stacy calls me over to her. “Your brother is so fine. I want him. Hook us up, please?” she begs as Haden’s ordering us drinks at the bar.
“Oh. Umm. I don’t think he’s interested,” I mumble awkwardly.
“Less thinking, more hooking us up, Jess,” Stacy grumbles, licking her lips in impatience.
“Seriously Stacy, I can’t force him to hook up with you. You should ask him yourself,” I tell her, walking over to the bar to help Haden with the drinks. “Sorry about the tag alongs,” I murmur.
“Not your fault,” he replies kindly, handing me two drinks to carry.
“Umm, I think I owe you a little heads up. Stacy is kind of into you,” I warn softly.
Haden rolls his eyes a little and grins. “Well, too bad for her. I’ve only got eyes for one girl.”
With my cheeks burning, I walk over to the table and set down the drinks I’m carrying. Haden follows me and sits down beside me on the empty seat.
“So Haden...are you single?” Stacy asks suggestively.
“At the moment, yes,” he answers politely, downing his shot.
“How would you like to change that?” she purrs, running her hand down Haden’s shirt
“Okay! Uncomfortable here!” I suddenly announce, shocking myself in the process.
Haden gives me a piercing look for a moment before grinning. “You know what, Jess is right. I do feel kind of uncomfortable here. How’s this. I’ll go meet up with my friends, and when you’re done with your buddies, you call me Jess?” he suggests, standing up and slowly edging away from Stacy.
“Sounds great!” I quickly agree.
“You could stay,” Amanda suggests instead.
“Very kind of you Amanda, but I’m a little too old to be hanging out with you guys. Besides, once I leave you can get down to gossiping and whatever else you feel like doing...all the high schooler stuff,” he calls over his shoulder as he walks out the door.
“Jessy, you’re our friend, right?” Amanda demands, turning on me.
“Yes” I answer cautiously.
“Please hook us up with your brothers. Please,” she begs softly.
“Look, I can’t tell them who to date. I’m sorry,” I reply, sipping at my whiskey.
“Don’t you know your loyalty is supposed to be to your friends, and not guys?” Stacy informs me sourly.
“Yes, I know that. But we aren’t talking about ordinary guys here. They are basically my family. I won’t force them to date you guys,” I murmur softly in response.
“Okay! Everyone cool it! Let’s have some drinks, and talk. Let’s not get into the whole boy drama,” Kimberly suggests, ordering everyone another round of drinks.
Why do I have a bad feeling about this?