"Did you send it?" Lisa pushed her glasses up the budget of her nose. She scavenged through the screen to see what she could fix on the photo.
"Yes."
"What did she say?" Jisoo moved the mouse for her, pointing to the little speck of dirt that was on the back drop.
"Nothing. Seen." The raven stretched her arms, leaning back in her chair, letting out a groan at the slight pain. The corner of her eyes caught a sleepy Seulgi who was supposed to be working, close to dropping her head on the keyboard. Jisoo finished her stretch by smacking Seulgi's head and retracting her arm.
"How have I ever hurt you?"
"Seeing your face hurts our feelings." Lisa shrugged. "I'm done. Ready to pack up?"
"I've been ready since morning."
"Hungry. Bona's place? I'll pay." Jisoo offered as her only effort to persuade.
"Drinks!" Lisa jumped from her seat, rushing to pack up. They all closed up the studio for the day and walked to the restaurant, discussing their plans for the weekend.
Jisoo was busy checking her messages once again in hope of a text. After their little moment of revelations, Jennie had left in a hurry and since then has been ignoring Jisoo's attempts to reach out to her. Neither Chaeyoung or Irene have even messaged her back.
Letting loose a sharp exhale, she walked behind Seulgi into the restaurant. It was as busy as they expected for a Friday afternoon. Jisoo realised her friends were busy talking to each other near the register, she wasn't bothered enough to walk to them.
She sauntered around, taking in the busy atmosphere. Everyone was worried about something even if they didn't seem to be. She was just one of everyone. Not everyone stood out in a crowd and Jisoo was fine just being one of the people.
She's heard that before. Someone that she wished she had never met had told her she was just someone in a crowd. Exes were a headache so Jisoo tried to stay away from having many, but one's words always seemed to taunt her in the back of her head.
Jisoo was smart enough to get rid of it quickly. She didn't need to think of that right now. Matter of fact, she shouldn't think of any girl right now other than her wife who seemed to not want her anymore after moving across the world for her. A small smile took its place on Jisoo's lips. Jennie was still indecisive.
"Thinking of someone pretty?" If Jisoo was startled by the voice, she didn't show it. Taeri stood beside her with a friendly smile. She was really friendly but unfortunately none of them had time to befriend her. Bona had started dating her right before Jisoo left for Korea.
"Pretty wouldn't be enough to describe her."
"Ohhh. Now I'm curious! Is she joining us? Lisa said "Some VIPs are coming, we need to be on our best behaviour!"." Jisoo shook her head, smile still on.
"Lisa's probably talking about Sooyoungie and Yeri. She won't come, and I don't think she wants to see me for a while anyway." Taeri fiddled with her fingers awkwardly. The raven internally sighed for ruining the atmosphere.
"Uhh-" Sparkling eyes stopped her words.
"We're going to get you so drunk today then!"
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"She said she loves me." Irene nodded, letting Jennie lean against her. "It scares me." Chaeyoung continued to stroke her hair as Jennie continued to speak. They didn't want to interrupt her. She was
"Because she means it. She means it as her, as Jisoo. She loves me. Not Jin."
"Jennie." Irene yawned, trying to get her little sister to sleep. Jennie has been in a haze for weeks now. She would either think out loud about Jisoo or she would just let her tears drop silently. "I love you but we really should sleep now. It's almost 2am! Even Chaeyoung is asleep!"
"Sorry. It's just...I can't help but feel scared everything will fall apart again." Irene slowly nodded, understanding her fears.
"I'm not Rosie so this won't really be comforting words but rather a reality check." Irene straightened her posture. "Jisoo left because she was there as her brother. She left for Lisa and her family. She didn't want to even come but then she didn't want to leave. And it was all because of you, Jen."
"She could've told me."
"Told you what? That she was just impersonating her missing brother? That she was blackmailed into a business marriage? Do you really think she planned on falling in love with you?"
"She loved you Jennie. Jisoo left to make sure no one got hurt while she was hurting. She genuinely believed she was giving you your happiness. While, yes she was wrong, she was hurting you, she was just being stupidly self-sacrificing."
"She didn't need to."
"She had to! What could you have possibly done at that time?!" Jennie was startled at the sudden raise in her sister's voice. "Sorry." Her sister quickly apologised, rubbing her forehead. "The only reason we've been allowed to come so far is because the wedding took place without any opposition."
Jennie didn't fight back with her as she wanted. She just crawled under the blanket, ignoring Irene.
"This isn't going to work." Irene stood up and quickly tapped away on her phone and waited for a reply. "You have been holed up in this room for almost a week while Jisoo texts us to check if you're okay every five minutes. I thought her little confession would be progress but obviously it didn't do shit for you."
She glanced at the Jennie shaped bulge on the bed one last time before she left the room. Her sister could be so childish for a grown woman.
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Lisa looked at the trembling puppy eyes in front of her. "Do you have no shame?"
"But Jennie..."
"No buts. Sit your butt down." Lisa ordered, sliding out of the to walk to the counter. It was barely 2 in the morning and Jisoo was drunk yet ready to blow up Irene's phone about Jennie once again.
"Yeah. Butt. Down." Seulgi murmured from under Jisoo. The latter was asleep and jisoo was too lazy to move her so she just sat on her. Jisoo just jumped on her, smiling when Seulgi squealed in pain.
"I'm hungry. Aren't the holidays coming around? Thanksgiving?" Bona yelled from the kitchen.
"I thought it was Easter." Taeri succeeded in getting Jisoo drunk but unfortunately she also succeeded in getting herself drunk. She was sitting opposite of Jisoo, head laid flat on the table.
"Wrong." Seulgi slapped Jisoo's knee weakly. "It's Family day."
"What's the plan?" The raven grumbled. "Club?"
"Are clubs open on Family day?" Seulgi yelled at Lisa.
"Not sure but can't we just get drinks and stay home? Let's just do it at our place."
"We're hosting?" Jisoo was now directly laying on Seulgi with little to no space.
"Have to." She got a reply from the girl under her. "So who's cooking the food?"
"Oh I will." Lisa replied, walking towards them with glasses of water. She set them down on the table. The air was stiff and silence overtook as the other women in the room looked at her with widening eyes.
They briefly made eye contact with each other before bursting out into uncontrollable laughter. Seulgi managed to squeeze out a few words between her wheezing "No, seriously. Who's cooking?"
"I am serious, I'm cooking it! I even learned some new recipes from dad." Lisa walked closer, flashing a wide, childish grin.
"NO!" The pillow Bona gave Seulgi flew right onto Lisa's face as she yelled.
"YOU'RE GOING TO EAT IT!" Jisoo watched Lisa suffocate Seulgi with said pillow while the latter struggled. She took that time to check the number for poison control just in case.
The knock at the door came like death bells to the four who were lazily still arguing about Lisa's deathly cooking. Sobriety seemed to ooze into their bodies. Last time anyone knocked this late, it ended with them in a whole different country.
"Seulgi." Lisa shivered, poking her arm with her index, urging her to sacrifice herself.
"Hell no. Taeri, go. Your girlfriend owns the place!" She received an aggressive shake of head in return.
"And we're clearly closed!"
"Then let's get Bona!" The pillow from Lisa's hand was snatched away to hit Seulgi in the face.
"No putting my girlfriend in danger!"
"Jisoo?" The raven groaned at her.
"I'm too young to die. You first, hag."
"You're a year younger!"
"Why don't both you, hags, go together?" Lisa said as she managed to slide into the booth and kick them off. She watched the two scramble on the floor, holding their limbs in pain before cautiously crawling to the door.
Another knock made them jump in place while Lisa hid under the table just in case. A pair of Keyes landed near Jisoo's feet before Taeri joined Lisa.
Jisoo crawled over with Seulgi behind her. For a few minutes, she struggled to push the keys into the keyhole. Once it was finally unlocked, she held onto the handle for strength as she pulled herself up to her feet. She jutted her jaw towards Seulgi, signalling her to get up but the girl shook her head, holding onto Jisoo's leg as she sat on the floor.
"Traitors." Jisoo muttered as she gulped and slowly unlocked the door.
"Faster."
"Fuck you!" She whisper-yelled at Lisa's impatience without turning. The door slowly opened and relief washed over Jisoo's face once she saw their uninvited guests for the night.
"Jennie?" Jisoo swung the door open eagerly, not attempting to control the smile taking over her face. She didn't even seem to notice the other two girls on Jennie's sides.
"Jennie?" Seulgi asked, looking up from the floor. Unfortunately for her, Irene was also present and was looking at her with disappointment rather than surprise.
"Before we enter, could you please explain why you're on the floor, hanging onto Jisoo's leg?" Her eyes peered into the hall. "Is that Lisa shivering under a table?"
"What?" Chaeyoung pushed past her to see the humiliating scene herself. Seeing who she assumed was the shape of a girl holding Lisa's arm caused an eye roll. She invited herself in, pushing past Jisoo to walk towards her.
"Come in, I guess." Jisoo awkwardly moved out of the way for the other two. "Hi." Her gaze was focused on Jennie who barely moved, sticking behind Irene the entire time.
A sigh left Irene's mouth when Jennie whispered back a polite "Hello." If she wasn't so irritated it would've made her howl into laughter.
"Jisoo," Irene called to get the raven's attention, which she received. "Jennie needs to speak to you. We went over to your apartment and you weren't there. My sister freaked out, made us look through half the city until we landed here.
"We finished early and it's Friday so we came here like usual." Jisoo tried to hide a smile knowing Jennie was worried about her. "You could've just texted me, you know?"
"Good luck telling her that." Irene exhaled angrily.
"I would suggest you talk in the morning but I strongly believe the proximity to you would make her stop bothering me." She ignored Jennie's glare. "Are you guys not going home?"
"We usually would've just slept at Bona's." Lisa sheepishly admitted much to their surprise.
"You were planning to sleep over at another woman's house knowing you're married?" Jennies voice came out through her gritted teeth and the raven didn't know how to feel. The alcohol in her decided she wasn't going to give in to Jennie today.
"She's our friend and we're all single." She stated matter of factly.
"I'm your wife, Jisoo!"
"Are you sure? Because I haven't come into contact with my so-called wife in weeks, Jennie." Unlike Jennie, Jisoo didn't sound angry, just desolate.
"I was busy." Jennie lied in a rush, prepared to get yelled at.
"Okay."
"Okay?" The younger was skeptical of the response. No one would've let this go, especially when drunk.
"Yes." Jisoo didn't have the heart to argue and didn't feel she had the right to either after how much she hurt Jennie. She turned to the others who were looking at her curiously. "You guys should go home."
Finally, finishing her work, Bona made her way to the front, frantically shaking her hands to get rid of the water instead of just using a tissue to wipe them dry.
"Let's go home, you alcoholics." She yelled coming out. Her eyes almost bulged out when she saw the group of uninvited guests. "On second thoughts, my home isn't big enough for all of you."
"I'm sorry, we were just leaving." Jennie announced. "We'll be staying over at Jisoo's place for the night."
"Pardon." Lisa crawled from under the table. The girl behind her also crawled up and walked to her girlfriend. "Who said our place is big enough?"
"Me."
"Well, fuck what you think." Jennie felt she was finally facing what Chaeyoung received from Lisa when they first met. "You can't just ignore us for weeks and waltz back as if nothing happened."
Jennie wasn't one to go without a fight today. "Well, Jisoo had no problem doing that to me."
"If I might remind you, you're in Canada not Korea. Jisoo wasn't the one that came back. You came searching for her."
"Lili," Jisoo walked over, pulling on Lisa's arm. "Let's go."
"Well, why couldn't she come back, huh?!" Tears rolled down Jennie's face as the anger on Lisa's face dissipated. "Why couldn't she come searching for me if she actually loved me?? Does she think just saying it now makes everything okay again? Because it doesn't! I'll still remember what happened to me even if no one else does!" She stormed out of the place without looking back, leaving everyone feeling guilty.
It was quiet for a few minutes except for some shuffling. Irene stepped up to walk after her but was stopped by a hand on her wrist. Before she could make sense of it, Jisoo was already out of the door.
"I'm not gonna lie but I'm kind of scared of Jisoo's girlfriend." Taeri decided to fess up.
"Oh, Jennie? Jennie wouldn't even hurt a fly!"
Taeri let out a sigh of relief, thanking Irene with a smile. "Okay, that's reassuring-"
"She would kill another woman that looks at Jisoo though." Chaeyoung's glare and tone instilled the fear back in her.
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Jennie was lost but she didn't have the energy to care. Her mind told her she was being unfair but she knew it wasn't completely right. Seeing Jisoo with her friends, her head raced with thoughts. What if Jisoo decided she didn't want this? She didn't want Jennie? What if her fear of being abandoned again never leaves? What if she really is abandoned once ag-
"Jennie!" She was surprised to hear her name from her most desired voice.Jisoo calling out for her was finally heard by her. She came back from her mind to see she was now standing near a bench, somewhere near a park. Jisoo jogged over with worry painted on her face. "I'm so glad you didn't go far. It's so dark and you don't even have a jacket."
"You don't either." Her words were met with a smile. Jisoo held out a sweater she had grabbed on the way. "Why don't you use it? That hoodie doesn't even look thick." Jennie turned to walk away but she couldn't bring herself to take a step.
Jisoo walked around to face her again with pleading eyes. "It's cold. Please." Without a fight, she took the sweater and put it on roughly and stood still. She wasn't sure what was to come next.
There wasn't enough time to guess when her wife stepped forward and began pulling on the sweater on her to fit a bit better. Jennie didn't refute, she was busy watching the concentration on the latter's face as she fiddled with the zipper and pulled it all the way up to the end. Jisoo had a small smirk on as she pulled over the hoodie onto Jennie and tightened the drawstrings slightly before tying it in a bow..
Her chest was heavy and her throat was closing up. The scent of Jisoo covered the entire area. It was comforting. Jennie wasted no time jumping into Jisoo, latching onto her torso.
"This is the first time." She murmured into her chest, barely audible to the girl right in front of her.
"Hmm?" A deep hum came from above her.
"This is the first time this has happened." Jennie whispered a bit louder. "My heart is beating at a stupidly fast pace right now. I feel light headed." Concern washed over Jisoo's face. She tried pulling apart.
"Why don't we si-"
"No." Jennie held her tighter. "Every time I felt this happening before, I would hope to feel you. At least a reminder of you, Jisoo. I even changed my perfume to maybe fool myself into thinking you're with me but you weren't. You are right now but I'm scared. You said you loved me but what if I'm just fooling myself? What if you leave me once again?"
With every word she uttered, Jisoo felt the guilt she carried grow heavier but she no longer felt the nagging voice rolling her to let Jennie go. No, not this time. She refused to deny herself from the truth.
"I'm sor- No." She stopped herself before she could speak the same tired words. "I left you and I'll forever regret that but I left myself with you, Jennie." Jisoo pried Jennie's arms from her, red eyes met her own adoring ones. She cupped Jennie's small face, wiping tears away with her thumbs.
"I didn't just miss you, Jendeukie. Every day, I felt empty because you were missing from me. No one around me could ever fill up what you are to me. And," Jisoo pulled back a bit so she didn't make an impulsive decision seeing Jennie's puffy lips.
"You have every right to be doubtful. You can even leave me now if you want-" She earned herself a punch on the shoulder from Jennie which only made Jisoo smile harder.
"But," Jisoo continued without faltering. "I wasn't lying about what I said, I don't care how hard it is, I will win your heart again. I'm going to make those silly little thoughts in that pretty little head of yours disappear little by little so please give me a chance, Kim Jennie." She was slightly squeezing Jennie's face, making her pucker up.
Jennie bit her bottom lip at the smile forming, her tears didn't seem to stop but now they fell for different reasons. She missed this. This Jisoo. The one that was so proactive in making her fall for her. The thought at the back of her head that swore Jisoo only acted in love for Jennie to like Jin slowly seemed to leave.
"You are so unfair." Jisoo stood, still smiling, and slowly pulled her hands away from Jennie's face. "Such a cheesy, sweet-talking, Casanova."
She didn't miss the way Jisoo said her name, putting Kim in front of it. Being affiliated with that last name would make Jennies skin crawl but the way it sounded from Jisoo's mouth made her heart flutter instead.
"Stay with me?" Jisoo pleaded with her eyes. Jennie was sure the older didn't know how strongly they resembled that of a puppy left in the cold. "I know it's probably too fast but just for tonight. Let's just stay together. You can put on your "I'm terribly angry at you even if I refuse to move from you" act in the morning."
"It's not an act." Jennie defended on instinct but it was such a weak whisper. Her eyes shut, when she felt Jisoo come closer.
"Do you want me to believe that?" She quickly shook her head much to Jisoo's delight. When she opened her eyes she looked up to see dark, glimmering orbs looking back at her. "I hate to be the one to ruin this moment but I have to be honest with you." Jennie felt her smile falter.
With all seriousness, Jisoo uttered the unexpected sentence. "With the way the hood is tied onto your head, you look like the teletubby sun baby."
"My hands are cold and for some reason I think if they make an impact with your face, they'll warm up." Jennie stared angrily with a scowl which only made Jisoo break her serious facade out to a grin. She took her hands and pulled them up to her face, letting them rest on her cheeks.
Jennie couldn't hold her scowl longer when she was palming Jisoo's grinning face. Jennie noticed her face was pretty warm while the mixture of alcohol and the cold made her cheeks bright pink. She let her hands travel to the back for her arms to clutch around Jisoo's neck, pulling her lower. "For some reason, my lips are getting cold too."
"I can fix that." Unlike usual, Jisoo didn't let her breath hit Jennie's lips first. As soon as she saw her eyes close, the raven pressed a soft kiss to her lips but that wasn't enough for Jennie. Her lips stuck out, pleading for Jisoo's to take them again which they did. She nibbled on Jisoo's lower lip as she sucked on it. The older quickly changed
It didn't hurt but it wasn't as gentle as Jisoo always had been because Jennie was leading them. Being away from Jisoo for so long and having this proximity made Jennie act a bit rough in an attempt to feel her.
Once they had to pull back for air, Jennie looked to see how swollen and slightly bruised Jisoo's lips looked as if she had made her mark. She imagined her damage was not as severe as the older still remained gentle. She pulled herself into Jisoo with the tightest hold she could muster.
"It's snowing." Jisoo noted, looking up. The younger didn't want to move away but she looked up to see the light snowfall.
Jennie cringed, pulling her eyes shut, when she felt little snowflakes drop onto her face. A soft kiss dropped onto her lips along with them and she could feel Jisoo smiling against her.
"Let's go home?" The younger nodded, eyes still closed.
"My legs are tired." Jennie almost whined when Jisoo pulled away. Her annoyance didn't last when she was now on Jisoo's back being carried home. It felt all too familiar in a good way. Out in the cold while it snowed with sweaters that could barely take the wind on yet they had never felt warmer.
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Good news, I think I'm out of my slump since this only took me a few days fo right. Bad news, I'm busy with finals and will be busier with summer courses and work. But not totally bad since I used to write and publish almost every day even when I was in school and working.