GENYA CAME INTO THE BEDROOM THAT NEXT MORNING BEAMING, I WAS GETTING THE AMPLIFIER today. I didn't know when, but Genya had guessed it was because Aleksander wanted to keep it a surprise. I felt anxious to finally be able to have my amplifier, after months, and years of dreaming of the herd I was finally getting it.
I knew it was with good intentions, but Baghra didn't agree. Since I'd seen her, which was almost weeks ago has denied my presence. She didn't want to train me, and I knew exactly why. She feared that I was being taken over, that Aleksander was using me. At first, I considered it possible, but now every time I was with Aleksander, I knew she was wrong. He would never take advantage of my power for his gaining; I just couldn't see that being true and if it were it would have happened when we first met.
Aleksander was at the Grand Palace meeting with the kings' advisors for the morning, so I didn't have anywhere to be besides training with Boykin, so Genya readied me for the morning and lead me out into the training fields.
✧✦
I trained for about two hours before I was making my way back into my chambers. I didn't think about the amplifier, as much as I was excited about getting it, it hadn't occurred to me how exactly I was being gifted. I didn't know what the amplifier looked like, all I ever knew was that it was a piece of bone from a stag, a strong amplifier, Sankt Ilya stated in one of his texts I remember reading a few days ago. I'd done plenty of research on the animal since Aleksander left to hunt it.
Well technically, two stags, existed in his text. One that at which was meant for me, the other... well I didn't know who the second one belonged to. I'd tried to dig deeper into the history of the stags, but I didn't get much information about them, other than the fact that one was now claimed to be mine.
For a good portion of the afternoon, I stayed back in my chambers and practiced summoning light. It had slowly started to become easier and easier each day that I did, it made me wonder what Baghra would say if she saw the amount of progress that I'd made since I'd last seen her.
A part of me wondered if she would still look unimpressed and tell me I still had a long way to go, or maybe she would tell me I'm almost there, but I doubted that. Nothing good ever came from that woman's mouth when it came to me summoning.
I almost snickered at the thought and realized I was doing better without her here to jab me with the end of her cane and practically insult me or my childhood. I was so much more carefree with summoning both the light and the shadows. Learning new tricks on how I could demand it to form, new hand movements, and shape it to whatever I wanted.
But I knew it wasn't enough, it had to be stronger. My power had limits, and I'd figured them out the first time I'd ever summoned in front of Baghra. I still didn't know what that was, or where it had come from, but it was there. I just couldn't figure out how to manipulate it.
✦✧
It was later that night when Ivan came to escort me to Aleksander's chambers. I didn't know what to expect going in there and quite frankly it now started to sink in that after tonight, my power would be stronger than ever. But just how strong?
I was led through the threshold and into his war room, where maps were scattered out all over the table and pinpoints to connect dots throughout Fjerda. Different escorts through secretive vacant trails and passages, I'd heard of them, but I didn't know whether they existed.
Aleksander was on the other side of the room, David who I met once was across from him talking to him in hushed whispers. David was a unique Grisha, smarter than anyone I'd met in this part of the country at least, but he was also quite awkward. But who was I to judge? Genya was practically head over heels for him, which shocked me more than ever, I'd expect her to go for someone charming like Aleksander or maybe even Fedyor.
We stopped once we were standing at their backs and I couldn't help but let out a nervous sigh. "Sir," Ivan said.
Aleksander looked over his shoulder to me and smiled softly, then turned his gaze to Ivan. "Thank you, Ivan."
Ivan bowed, then stepped back. Aleksander turned to David and nodded, then turned back to face me, slowly striding closer until he was in arm's reach. "Are you ready?" He asked. I don't know. I wanted to say it out loud, but no words could form even if I tried, so I nodded, "yes," I said, my voice wavering.
Aleksander nodded but then stepped closer his hand coming to rest on my cheek, "do you trust me?"
"Yes," I said again, "with my whole life," he smiled, his fingers smoothly caressing my cheek, making me wonder if he could feel my nerves.
David appeared at our side, a black shimmering box in hand, and opened it. I almost gasped at the sight. A golden metal bracelet lied inside, engraved with a foreign language that circled the inner band in black ink.
"It's beautiful," I sighed; glancing up at Aleksander, "what kind of language is this?"
"It is Shu," David replied, "It came from one of Sankt Ilya's prophecies,"
I nodded, glancing back to Aleksander. "I am ready," I said again, but my nerves had subsided long ago now.
David carefully grabbed the bracelet from the box and handed it over to Ivan. I pulled up the sleeve of my kefta and held out my hand. The golden clasp opened and David took in a shaken breath, placed the bracelet upon my wrist, and gently secured it.
A surge of power overcame me, running through my veins at a lightning speed, and then the next moment a beam of starlight formed in my palm. I let the ball linger in the air, then raised my other to summon up a ball of shadow. The power was strong and surging, more than anything that I'd ever felt while summoning my power before. It was almost painful to feel, but also pleasurable, to feel such raw power.
I looked away from the light and to Aleksander, his eyes were alight but then there was something I'd never seen in them, hunger, longing.
His eyes didn't leave the light but focused solemnly. He peered over his shoulder a moment later to Ivan and nodded. I furrowed my brows but then I heard Ivan walking up behind me and my heartbeat slowly began to slow.
I felt my legs giving out beneath me, but then as soon as I'd started collapsing Aleksander was at my side holding me upright against his chest whispering incoherent words into my ear, and then my power began to seep from my body. And it wasn't in my control.
I felt a wave of fear overtakes me, no. This wasn't what I'd been expecting to happen. My body responded to every caress of Aleksander's hands that brushed my back. I thought I heard "That's enough, Ivan." And then seconds later I was standing upright with Aleksander's hands resting on my shoulders. I didn't know what just happened, but I couldn't help myself from pulling away from his touch and looking up at him wide-eyed, "what the hell did you just do to me?" I asked my throat tightening with every word.
Aleksander wasn't even looking at me, his eyes were strayed over my shoulder on the wall. I looked down at the bracelet on my wrist and felt a buzzing sensation growing like it had when it was first placed onto my wrist. I looked back up at Aleksander. He wasn't even touching me, but his grey onyx eyes were anything but grey anymore, they were almost brown. What had he done?
He then turned to David and pat him on the shoulder, "You did well today David," Aleksander started, "The bracelet is made from Grisha steel," He looked over his shoulder to me, "It cannot be taken off without either I or David's permission."
I shook my head, this was all too much to take in, "what are you talking about?" I asked, "it's an enchantment, David created it. It's got the stags bone engraved into the pendant. You cannot take it off on your own, it's impossible actually."
"What are you saying?" I asked, my voice laced with fear, "what is the meaning of all this? I thought the stag was mine,"
"It was yours, my dear. But I've found a way to make it mine also," my chest tightened, and then I realized that everything Baghra had said to me in the past was true and that I'd indeed become and pawn.
I thought back to all the times we'd been together, every word, every touch, everything in between it all was all lies, and I should have listened to Baghra's judgment, but I was far gone to even listen to her because I was too busy playing his toy. Every ounce of me felt numb, I wanted to get sick, to run out of the room, to get as far from Aleksander as humanly possible.
I thought back to the time at the wishing well, when he'd told me his past story. Told me his guilt about his grandfather and everything. I'd listened, and believed everything that he'd ever said to me and it was all a lie.
"You— this— everything was it real?" I asked numbly, "Did you mean anything that you ever said to me? Or was it all a lie?"
Aleksander closed his eyes and turned his attention to David and Ivan, "Wait outside," he said.
I took a step closer, "this," I held up my wrist, "this— you said that the stag was mine, you said its power was mine."
The door shut and Aleksander turned back to me, "it is yours just as much as it is mine," he whispered, eyes locking with mine. I shook my head, "but it isn't yours," I said through gritted teeth, "that power does not belong to you."
"It was meant to be ours," Aleksander said, slowly striding towards me. "It was meant to be our power, combined."
He stood in front of me now, hands coming to cup my cheek, "our power, will destroy the fold."
I yanked my head away from his touch as the amplifier buzzed, "I don't believe you," I started, "I don't know what I believe anymore."
"Tell me I'm thinking wrong and I might just believe you." I pleaded, "tell me."
"You are thinking wrong," Aleksander said. I didn't believe him.
I shook my head, "I still don't believe you though," I released a sob, "I don't believe anything I'm hearing, this is a dream, a nightmare I can't wake up from."
Aleksander's expression changed, his eyes grew darker, and he grabbed the back of my neck, pulling me closer, "then maybe it is a nightmare, or maybe I'm just becoming the villain."
I tried to pull myself away, "please," I sobbed, "please don't be like this." I closed my eyes as tears began to fall down my cheek, "please be not what Baghra had told me."
Aleksander pulled away from me, "she told you things of the past, didn't she?" He said drily, "and you do you believe the things she says, Maira?"
I shook my head, "no," I opened my eyes and glared up at him, " I didn't believe her at first because I was too busy playing your little toy." I stepped back as shadows began to climb the wall.
"But don't worry," I started, "after everything that's happened in the last few minutes—" I stopped and swallowed the lump in my throat, "now I'm starting to believe it."
His eyes were filled with rage and then the next minute happened faster than I could blink, he had me up against the wall, hand wrapped around my throat, "Well then," he seethed, "I hope you like living in the dark."
And then he was kissing me again, hard. But I didn't kiss him back. I cried and tried to push him off, but he was too strong. He pulled away a few seconds later and released his hold on my neck, "Ivan!" He shouted.
Ivan came through the doors as Aleksander sneered, "take Maira back to her room and station four guards outside her door. she won't be having visitors for a long time."
Ivan nodded and then gripped me by the arm and led me out. I cried silently into my hand the entire time. Everything was happening too fast, just earlier today I was looking forward to getting an amplifier, training, and living a good new life. Now I was a prisoner, and Aleksander was everything Baghra had described him to be.
I loved him, with everything in me and I didn't even know if his love for me was real anymore. But he was right, he was turning into the villain the moment I looked at him earlier, the greed in his eyes just looking at my power. The longing for something so bright.
Once I was in my chambers, the door closed behind me and I screamed, light exploding from my body.
To be continued....
2,335 words written.
Author's note:
Longer chapter and I know a few lines are from Siege and Storm, but you know Hehe, I couldn't resist. You all are probably going to hate me now and that's fine. But it is the way it is ;(