Draupadi
Khandavprasth was just like a newborn child. So brittle yet so full of hope. At least to me it was. Unlike most of my family members, I fell in love with this barren godforsaken land at the very first sight.
The monotony of this parched wilderness provided me a sense of ataraxia something that the luxurious palace of Hastinapur failed. Hastinapur was unendurably suffocating, it never felt like home but this place did. My Khandavprasth did.
My Khandavprasth, Indeed
It might be the eldest Pandav's kingdom but it was my child, a child I was nourishing with all the warmth my heart held. It had been three months that we arrived here and since then I started waking up before everyone did, and slept after everyone.
Some of the buildings of the royal palace were still under construction. Time seemed to pass way too quickly here, there's always something that needs to be looked after but today I was finding it hard to even breath properly.
The coveted cousin of Pandavs, dearest nephew of Mata Kunti and the person I formerly considered my friend ; Krishna of Dwarka had graced Khandavprasth.
Former because he didn't bother greeting me for once since he arrived and it had already been two hours. Govind was my friend before he became their cousin but people were right when they say blood is thicker than water
A yawn escaped my mouth as I pushed the door of my chamber with my eyelids feeling heavy from the exhaust. Before I could shut my mouth my eyes landed on a certain peacock feathered crown resting on the table near the couch.
My eyes drifted from the crown to the person owned it. He was laying on the couch, his head resting on his left hand and another hand holding the apple he was devouring. His lotus eyes fluttered open and he immediately sat up, his lips curved, His smile was like a sudden beam of sunlight illuminating the darkest corners of the room.
There was something enigmatic about Govind. Just one look at him and one was bound to forget all their anguish, misery and suffering. Sometimes when I looked at him I felt there was no such thing as anguish existed, just pure joy.
"Since the Queen of Khandavprasth is too busy to find any time for her friend, I decided to greet you myself" He accused in his honeyed voice earning a glare from me
"Really?" I asked incredulously while advancing toward him "I waited three hours at the entrance to welcome you only to know you were already welcomed by your cherished cousin midway and asked us to have our lunch because you two needed to breath in fresh air, an air Draupadi doesn't breath in"
"Now this is what I call exaggeration" He sighed "It was just a coincident and you should blame your husband"
I couldn't help but let out a dry chuckle as I took a sit beside him "Blame whom? My husband whom I haven't even seen in months?"
He just smiled and placed a hand on my head as I closed my eyes. He always did this and as oddly as it'd sound to others, this very gesture from him was enough to calm my nervs.
After what I felt like eternity Govind's doux voice finally broke the silence "How are you, Sakhi?"
How was I?
An wanted heaviness settled in my heart and started crushing my soul while a sob rose in my throat. Gradually lifting my lids, I looked up letting my eyes that were burning with unshaded tears clash with his empyrean ones
"I don't know" I managed to whisper as a lone tear rolled down my cheek, I shifted my gaze from him to the cloudless blue sky "I don't know Govind. I can't say I am not happy. I've everything a woman could possibly want yet..." I trailed off, drawing a short quick breath as I closed my eyes "There's something that's not letting be feel it Govind and I'm tired, so very tired of ignoring it"
"Then don't ignore it" He stated in an obvious tone.
"I've promi—"
"I believe you've never promised being happy all the time?" He cut me short "Because that would be stupidest thing to do, I expect you to be anything but stupid Draupadi"
"You don't understand, do you?" I tried swallowing down the lump that had formed in my throat "I'm not free to be me, I've to be mindful with every single thing that I do or speak yet I don't miss those curious glances of our maids or the whispers, those ugly whispers about me and my conjugal life" I physically cringed recalling the things I heard about myself.
"And how would their words affect you?" He asked "Their words just express their thought process and how they are as person and nothing about you"
"I wish people understand I wasn't prepare for whatever that happened with me, neither I had any contribution in it" My voice quavered as I quit fighting the tears "I wish they had given me some more time"
He didn't say anything instead he placed his hand mine and let me unleash my emotions. After a while I finally managed to compose myself, wiping the tears off of with the back of my palm in a rather vigorous manner I looked up, the corner of my lips lifted up "How do you do this?"
"Do what?" He asked as innocently as he could "Make you cry? Listen, Queen Draupadi I shall not be blamed for this"
Letting out a chortle I shook my head "Govind, When will rest of your family arrive?"
"Later, I came here earlier to make you cry"
I rolled my eyes "What about Satya? You could have brought her along. Since you'd be busy with your cousin, I'd be all alone without her"
"That—" Before he could defend his best friend and himself a maid came in and interrupted him
"Hail Dwarkadheesh Krishna" She bowed before resuming with her gaze fixed on the white marble floor "Prince Arjun is waiting for you outside"
I threw a 'told you' glance at Govind who let out a chuckle "Tell him I asked him to come in"
"Govind!" I looked at him incredulously, I wasn't ready to face Arjun, I didn't know how I would react and with him I usually I acted exactly in the opposite of what I intend to.
"What?"
"Why di—"
The sound of someone clearing their throat brought an abrupt halt in my track and before I could restrain myself, my ebony orbs darted toward the entrance and clashed against the very familiar orphic golden ones. Something arcane flashed across those amber orbs and before I had the time to figure it out he teared his gaze off of me and settled his eyes on Govind.
"Are you waiting for Krishnaa to welcome you personally, Parth?" Govind quipped "Come on in"
"Madhav the horses are ready, if you're done here we can start our journey now" Ignoring Govind's words and my whole presence he denoted.
Rage pulsed through my veins as I tried swallowing down the fury. I was trying my best to reason with his unpredictable actions but I was failing. I truly had no idea how this cold behavior towards me would ever help us. Did he plan on spending the rest of our life this way?
"Things will fall in place Krishnaa" Govind whispered in his dulect tone patting my head before rising on his feet as he added "They always do"
I kept my eyes glued to the blue carpet covering the marble floor as I listened their footsteps fading away.
The fact that Vajragni has turned one almost a week ago and I couldn't even post an announcement regarding it breaks my heart
Tbh I had planned SO MUCH to do on that day... But it's okay I guess :D
Anyways hope you liked, don't forget to vote and comment if you do
Ps. No proof of reading :')
Jay shri Krishnarjun
Arjunaradhika