"A boyfriend. They have a boyfriend and that's him. Claire Wolffee," Jerome explained, crossing his arms and shaking his head. "He's like- the most annoying person to ever walk the Earth! He's a scum, a prick, a manipulator, and a very well-known cheater around town! I don't understand how he keeps getting partners- I especially don't understand how Y/n could have fallen for him! He's so toxic and yet they fell right into his arms. Like- did they not read the signs? Why wasn't anyone able to convince them that he was not healthy for them?! And now they're too far in to even listen to the rest of us as we try to explain to them that he will only hurt them in the end!"
"Umm- Okay, chill out. I was not asking for that random backstory on his character. I was just merely asking because I'm surprised Y/n found a partner that can actually tolerate them. Claire must have some really low standards," Bill rolled his eyes, already walking back to where he had been sitting previously.
Jerome sighed, glaring out the window at the two as they talked. "I don't get why everyone goes for the bad ones who will only break them in the end. Why not go for someone who is loyal? Someone who will treat them with respect and love and adoration? ...I'm just really lonely and want a partner."
Jerome pouted, Vox walking over and giving their ginger friend a small pat on his shoulder in an attempt to comfort him. Bill groaned, making a disgusted face as he began to scratch his nails against the floor. "Kid, love is useless. It does more harm than good. Love sends you into this false sense of security that for a small moment everything is happy and good in the world. But then it shatters, that happiness comes tumbling down and true colors are revealed. You're always left with more pain and heartbreak in the end that will never be fixed no matter how much tape or glue you use to stick that heart of yours back together. You will never be whole again and people will continue to take that fragile heart of yours and break it down more and more until there is nothing left to fix. So, take my advice: don't let love fool you. Love is an illusion and you're better off just never falling into that pit of heartbreak and despair."
Jerome stared at Bill in silence, his jaw having slightly dropped as he listened to the demon's words. He then quickly began to take his phone out and began writing down Bill's advice, finding it very interesting and very important to his demon research.
Vox silently glared at Bill, not saying anything as they did. Bill had no idea what that was all about so he just looked away and chose to ignore it.
After a moment of silence that followed Bill's lesson on love, a ticket order came through the window and quickly after Y/n's head poked through said window with a smile on their face. "Hey! This is Claire's order. If you guys could add maybe some extra toppings on it, that would be great."
"Sure, anything for you. But quick question: Did Claire actually pay this time?" Jerome asked, looking over which milkshake Claire had ordered.
"...No. He didn't."
"Did he manipulate you into giving him yet another free milkshake?"
"No! Of course not!"
"Y/n, if the boss finds out you're giving out so many free milkshakes-"
"But he's not going to find out. He's on vacation and I know you guys won't rat me out for it. You-... You won't tell him, right?"
Jerome glanced over at Vox who was ignoring the conversation completely and just getting started on making the milkshake. He sighed, rubbing the back of his neck before looking back up at Y/n. "Of course I won't tell. But only if you promise me that you'll stop doing this for him. He's going to get you into trouble and is using you to get free food. It's not fair to you. If he wants something, he should be able to buy it himself."
"I-... Yeah, okay, this is the last time. It's just-... he said he forgot his wallet back at home and didn't want to drive all the way back to go and grab it, which I understand. He'll pay for it later. He said so," Y/n said before pulling their head out of the window and going back to the register.
'I just hear a lot of excuses from that guy. He always says he'll pay and never does...' Jerome thought to himself before getting to work.
Bill enjoyed the silence as it came back for a short period, watching as they blended ice cream and began placing whip cream and toppings onto the mason jars to make it look all pretty. As the two had been working on Claire's to make sure it looked perfect for him, more tickets began flying through the window and they started to get backed up.
"Frick- One family alone just ordered 8 milkshakes! Uh... Bill! Could you help us out?!" Jerome panicked, looking at the ticket in his hand fearfully.
"...And why would I do that?"
"Come on, please?! ...It gives you an excuse to leave the back! And, uh- you can have the lunch I packed for today if you want-"
"Woah there, you trying to make a deal with a demon, kid~?"
Jerome watched Bill stand up and frowned, watching another ticket come through. "I-... Umm... It's just... Brik is busy organizing the sodas, Y/n is on register, and Vox and I can only do so much on our own. The first rush today was bad enough and now we have to deal with this second rush- You don't have to do much! We can make them, but could you help us run the milkshakes out so they're not just sitting here melting...? I just- the offer still stands, Iwasn'teventhathungryanyway-"
Bill sighed, finding Jerome's panicked state to be more irritating than entertaining at the moment. He walked over, placing his hand on top of Jerome's head which caused the ginger to stop speaking. Cool, Bill found the mute button. "Keep your lunch, Camera. And stop rambling. I'll run the stupid milkshakes for you."
"Really?! Thanks! Uh-... wait, Camera?"
Jerome wanted to further question why Bill called him that, but the demon had already grabbed Claire's milkshake and was out running it.
Bill ignored the suspicious look he could feel Y/n giving him as he passed the register and made his way outside where there were a few tables and chairs set up for people to sit down and drink while either enjoying the fresh air or dying from the heat. It really was a hot day, making Bill further question what season it was and how long he had been out for. It was possible it could still be summer, though when he got erased it had been nearing the end of the season. Was Fall coming up? Was this what Fall temperature felt like in North Carolina?
Bill looked around, quickly spotting the platinum blond male who was leaning back and scrolling away on his phone while paying zero attention to his surroundings. The demon waltzed over, placing the mug down which made Claire finally look up. It was hard to tell what his expression was as half of his face was covered by his glasses. Looking closer and noticing Claire's head bob up and down slightly, Bill assumed that this guy was looking him over. Was he checking him out or something? Not that Bill would be complaining, he knew he was much better looking than Y/n. Though, he definitely wouldn't go out with someone who's standards were so low that they chose someone like Y/n over literally anyone else.
"If you want, I can just pose and you can snap a picture. As much as I love the attention, I do have other milkshakes to deliver and can't stay long," Bill spoke up, breaking the silence.
Claire seemed to retract a bit when the demon spoke up, his nose scrunching up slightly. "I haven't seen you around here before. Who are you- and where is the freak and that mute kid that always follows him around like some lost puppy?"
Bill shoved his hands in his pockets, swaying forward and backwards as his feet switched from being on the tip of his toes to resting on the back of his heels. "Seriously? Out of all the nicknames you could think of, that's what you settled on? That's... pretty pathetic. One: the 'mute' nickname doesn't fit Vox very well as they are capable of speaking, they just seem to choose not to speak up. And you call Jerome a freak like being a 'freak' is a bad thing. Being a 'freak' isn't really an insult, it's more like you're calling Jerome unique from what the average person is meant to be seen as and one might take that as a compliment. So if you're trying to insult them, I suggest finding better nicknames. If it was meant to be a compliment, just change Vox's. But considering the tone you used when you asked where they were, I'm gonna take it that you meant for the nicknames to be an insult. In which case I must say: you failed. Miserably."
Claire fell silent, his jaw hanging open as Bill assumed he was more than likely staring at him even more now behind those sunglasses of his. Bill wasn't saying all that because he was defending the kids, more like he just wanted to give a human a proper lesson on how to give people nicknames that fit them. Bill would know, he was the master at handing out nicknames, after all.
Claire sat up straighter, his fist hitting the surface of the table which caused it and the milkshake to shake slightly but Bill was unphased by this action. He enjoyed seeing him appear pissed off. Human's egos could be broken so easily and it was truly hilarious to him how fragile their feelings were. "Who exactly do you think you are?"
"Bill Cipher! Y/n's childhood best friend. Pleasure to make your acquaintance~"
"You're Y/n's best friend?" Claire paused before he leaned back in his chair and crossed his arms, a grin appearing on his face. "Really now? I find that hard to believe. They've never mentioned you before so I highly doubt you could be their 'best friend'."
Was this Claire's attempt to break Bill's ego now to try and gain a bit of his pride back? How cute. This was absolutely hilarious to Bill and he couldn't help but laugh. "And who exactly do you think you are to say I'm not actually Y/n's best friend, hmm?"
"Claire Wolffee, Y/n's boyfriend. I'm sure you've heard of me."
"No."
"...What?"
"Did I stutter? I said what I said. I find it so hard to believe that you're actually dating Y/n when you've never come up in conversation before~ Guess you're not as special as you thought you were."
Claire seemed taken aback by this response, his mouth opening and closing as he tried to come up with something to retaliate with but nothing was coming to mind. Bill just grinned, spinning around and skipping back into the store as he left Claire absolutely speechless. The milkshake had been sitting there untouched in the heat for so long that the whip cream on top actually began to melt down the side of the mason jar before landing on the table.
"Hey- What took you so long?" Jerome asked as he watched Bill return.
The demon held a victorious grin on his face, going to pick up the next mug he needed to take out and shrugged. "I'm a demon getting used to being inside of a human body. I think that's a reasonable excuse to be a bit slower than the normal walking pace you humans tend to walk at."
Vox glanced over at Bill, not believing a word he said. They weren't entirely sure what else could have made Bill take so long delivering that single milkshake, but they doubted it was because he was still 'learning to adjust to his new body'. Jerome seemed quick to believe Bill, however, and just nodded his head before going back to helping Vox with decorating the milkshakes.
It took about two hours before the rush finally began to slow down once again and they just had to make the occasional milkshake here and there. Bill had been much quicker to deliver the milkshakes after his first run which really helped Vox and Jerome out a lot with getting orders out on time. It would have taken them longer if they had to blend the ice cream, decorate the milkshake, run it out, search high and low for the person who ordered it because people apparently forget their own names when it's being shouted for all to hear, and then come back and begin the process all over again. So Bill helping out definitely killed some time and eventually both Jerome and Vox were able to sit down and take a lunch break. Jerome even ended up splitting his lunch with Bill even though they never actually made the deal. Bill was confused, but due to how hungry he was he didn't question the human's kindness and just ate the food.
"So... 'Camera'? Why'd you call me that?" Jerome asked as he finished eating, looking over at the demon.
"Hmm? Oh- I just give nicknames out to pretty much everyone. It's not something that's meant to be 'special' or anything like that."
"Is that a demon thing?! Like do all demons give humans their own special nickname?!"
"...Again. Not special. I just do it. It's just a me thing, I think. I just find it easier than trying to remember someone's name, I guess," Bill shrugged, leaning back and licking the crumbs from the sandwich he ate off his fingers.
"Hmm... Well- How come mine is 'Camera'?"
"Well... First of all, when we met you didn't stop taking photos of me when you found out I was a demon. Second of all, it fits your personality."
"A camera fits my personality...?" Jerome tilted his head to the side, confused by that.
Bill nodded, thinking for a moment before beginning to explain his reasoning behind the nickname. "You're very... energetic and outgoing. You seem to constantly be exploring, your eyes capturing the world around you as you seek knowledge and answers to your unsolved questions and mysteries. You're searching for clues, wanting to obtain evidence to prove to the people who question you that you were right all along. You see the world through different lenses. Instead of accepting the norm and how things are said to be, you view the world around you as a mystery and go seeking for the weirdness that people choose to ignore."
"Woah..." Jerome's eyes widened, seeming really pleased and happy with that answer he was given as he, once again, took out his phone and began to jot down what Bill had said. When he was done typing away all the information he just gathered on what his nickname meant to the demon, he looked back up at Bill before glancing curiously over at Vox. "What about Vox? Do they have a nickname?"
Bill glanced over at the quiet child, silently observing them for a moment before nodding his head. "Headphones."
"...Because they wear headphones-?"
"It's not as simple as that, I'll have you know. There's a lot of thought behind the nicknames I create. For example: Vox doesn't seem to speak much. They're very quiet, but their expressions can be so loud at times that they don't need their voice to speak their mind at that point. One look from them and you already know what is on their mind, and it seems like there's always a lot on their mind but they choose to keep those thoughts to themselves. They're different from you because you're someone who wants to be out in the world, but Vox prefers staying in their headspace and keeping to themselves. Those headphones go over their ears and suddenly the whole world is silenced. All they have at that point is their own thoughts and music, dancing around their head. They're so loud when inside their head, yet so quiet to the rest of us who wish we could know just what exactly Vox was thinking."
When Bill finished his explanation behind the nickname, Vox lifted their head completely and stared at Bill with wide eyes. The demon only met them a day ago and yet he talks as if he's known them for the longest time. The entire description of Vox's personality as a whole was completely on point and they didn't know whether to be scared by that or impressed. They just lowered their head before giving a quick nod.
"Woah- that's so cool!" Jerome exclaimed, very impressed by how the demon's thought process worked. It was so interesting how such simple nicknames have a deeper meaning behind them in the demon's mind.
Bill leaned back, looking between the two before a small smirk began to grow. Maybe these two weren't so bad, he didn't mind having a little fanbase that seemed to praise him for being what he was. It was refreshing, he really wanted that feeling of praise and adoration again. He used to feel it all the time from the other demons, but ever since he's moved in with Y/n he's only been treated like some child. No respect or love came from Y/n and it infuriated him greatly. So maybe having these two around wouldn't be so bad. Maybe he could use their praise to his advantage one day. He could use a few good minions to cause some chaos for him, and in return he could offer some knowledge about his species as well as knowledge about the rest of the weirdness within this world.
The rest of the shift went on smoothly from there on; the occasional customer would come in to order a milkshake or look around the store and the workers were able to find time to relax and begin cleaning up for the day. It wasn't as terrible of a day as Bill assumed it would be, but he wanted to go home at this point and get away from this place of responsibility. Soon he would be getting his wish, but not soon enough, sadly. While the four employees were cleaning up and the last few customers were finishing up their shopping, the door to the store swung open once more and two men in black suits entered the building.
"Alright! I need all civilians who do not work here to exit the building immediately. Drop whatever items you have yet to purchase and walk out. The store will be open again tomorrow. I need the employees to all step out and line up in front of the register."
"In front of the register!"
Bill, Jerome, and Vox had completely stopped everything that they were doing, going to sneakily peek through the window to see who was yelling and who was being the echo for the yelling. Jerome's eyes were the first to widen, quickly shoving Bill down and out of sight.
"Hey-"
"Shh!" Jerome put a finger to his own lips, looking at Bill sternly. He then made a hand gesture to show Bill he needed to stay there before he turned around and hurriedly walked out with Vox.
To say Bill was confused was an understatement as he got back up and crouched a bit, leaning close to the window. Luckily these men seemed loud enough that Bill could hear the majority of what they were saying.
"Is there... something we can help you with, Mr. ...?" Y/n started off cautiously, shoving their hands in their pockets.
The tall man with black and grey hair, a big mustache, and an even larger nose looked between the four workers, waiting for all of the customers to leave before he spoke up. "My name is Agent Powers, this is Agent Triggers, we are here to investigate some of the mysterious activity that has occurred recently within this town."
"Activity!" the other man spoke up; the second agent had short, light brown hair, a clean shaven face, and a smaller nose but a much angrier expression on his face.
"Mysterious activity...? Like, the power outage that happened across town?" Y/n spoke up, straightening their posture. They glanced over at Jerome and Vox, nervously beginning to wonder where they ended up leaving the demon but said nothing and simply turned to face the agents once more.
"That information is classified. ...But yes." Agent Powers nodded his head, looking between the four of them. "We know that your shop is the closest to where we believe the source of the power outage took place and we came here looking to see if anyone was here working that night."
"Y/n was," Brik spoke quickly, straightening his posture as Agent Powers looked towards him. "When the power outage struck the town, I quickly messaged our boss about it since he's out of state on vacation at the moment. He told me he wanted someone up there looking after the store to make sure nothing got stolen during the night, and I was originally planning on going but my family needed me at the house that night. I didn't like the idea of leaving them alone... so I messaged Y/n, asked them if they'd be able to go up and look after the shop. I was really grateful to get a response back almost instantly that they would. So yeah, they were here that night."
Agent Powers raised a brow while Y/n gave a small smile. Out of all the times Brik wanted to give credit where credit was due, they really wished he hadn't done so just then. They had an idea of what exactly these agents were looking for, and if the agents figured out that they were currently harboring a demon within their household... they didn't even want to think of the consequences.
"Is that right? And which one of you goes by the name Y/n?"
"That would be me, sir."
"Y/n. The night you were here during the townwide power outage, did you see anything peculiar or paranormal occur? Did you see anything or anyone roaming the streets that seemed out of the ordinary that night?"
Bill froze, quickly ducking underneath the window once more after hearing this question. He didn't know who these agents were or what they wanted, but they knew something happened that night. He wondered how much they knew: did they know specifically that a demon was reincarnated that night or did they just assume something out of the ordinary occurred and they're still trying to figure out what it was?
"Anything paranormal? You must be joking, right?"
"I can assure you that I am not. I was born with a very rare birth defect that causes me to be incapable of joking," Agent Powers quickly answered in the most monotone voice Y/n had ever heard someone speak in.
"Oh. Wow. I'm sorry, I didn't know- Umm... No, no I don't recall seeing anything that night. It was just me here. Alone. Just me and my candles, wishing I could go back home and get some sleep." Y/n crossed their arms, keeping their voice steady as lies spilled from their deceitful mouth.
The agents both fell silent, seeming to have a staring contest with Y/n while Y/n remained grounded and stayed confident with their story. After some time of consideration, the agents decided to take Y/n's words as the truth. Agent Powers reached inside of his coat, pulling out four white cards and handing one out to each employee.
"Alright, well thank you for your time and I'm sorry for the inconvenience we may have caused you today. We would like to ask that if any of you see anything out of the ordinary, or spot something that just seems out of place to you and quite possibly might be something paranormal, that you call this number. If you do happen to lose this card, you know of our government facility that sits conveniently near the very edge of town. Not near here, but on the complete opposite side of town. You should know the place, the building is fairly large and hard to miss. Just go there if you have anything to report and let the people in the front know that you are from the Mercy General Store so they can let you in."
"Anything to report," Agent Triggers echoed with a bit of a growl in his voice.
The four nodded in understanding, watching the agents turn around and walk out of their store. Once they were out of sight, Brik turned to face Jerome and nudged him. "I'm surprised by you: you've been hunting down the supernatural for how long and suddenly when you're given an opportunity to talk about it you shut up? What gives?"
"Oh- Y'know... I was just- uh.. in shock from all this to the point that I couldn't speak. Like, at all. I mean- it's pretty crazy that government agents want to work with us to find the paranormal activities in this town. Crazy, right?! I'll-... have to call the number later and try to talk to them about it."
"You better. I'd hate for you to miss out on an opportunity to go and live out your dreams." Brik smiled gently, ruffling up the ginger's hair.
"Yeah... Me too." Jerome laughed nervously in response, rubbing his arm.
"Well hey- Those two just kicked out the last of our customers for the day. Let's go ahead and finish cleaning so we can get out of here and go home," Y/n quickly said, clasping their hands together before getting back to what they had been doing before Agent Powers and Agent Triggers showed up to interrogate them.
It took around fifteen minutes before everything was cleaned up and the four employees could sign out and call it a day. When they did so, Y/n went and grabbed Bill from the back room, dragging him out of the store and wishing everyone else a good rest of their day before getting in their car and driving off. The human and demon did not say a word to each other at first, left to their own thoughts that seemed to be scattered at the moment. Bill looked out the window, watching the trees pass by quickly as they made their way back to Y/n's home.
"...So... a government facility resides in Mercy, North Carolina?"
"Yeah."
"...You forgot to mention that fun fact."
"Yeah... Yeah, I guess I did."
"...Do you think they know?"
"I don't-... I don't know, Bill. I have no idea what they do or don't know. It's a good thing you're disguised as a human right now, though. Let's... keep it that way. Jerome, Vox, and Norah can keep a secret. Let's make sure no one else figures out who you really are. If those agents find out you're a demon... I don't think you will ever be leaving this town."
Bill fell quiet, giving a slow nod. The rest of the ride home was silent.
The demon got to experience what a day at work was like for a human.
~~~
"Good morning, Gravity Falls. It's another beautiful day, but every day is beautiful now that the...unpleasantness is over. In other news, the Northwest family has gone broke. After pledging his allegiance to Bill and then placing all his savings in weirdness bonds, Preston Northwest had to sell his mansion to preserve his family fortune. But fortunes have also turned for local maniac, Fiddleford McGucket, who, after regaining his sanity, has made millions overnight submitting his patents to the US government. In other good news, town hero, Stanley Pines, has fully recovered his memory and will be throwing a party to celebrate his niece and nephew's thirteenth birthday and final day in town. But other than that, I can safely say our beloved Gravity Falls is back to normal. And now, Bodacious T, with sports."
"It's called, 'death ball.'"
Wkh jryhuqphqw lv diwhu xv, zh grq'w kdyh wlph wr zdvwh.
Zh qhhg wr euhdn wkh eduulhu vr L fdq jhw rxw ri wklv sodfh.
Chapter 10: Sunday, Sept. 4th, 2022