Note:
- Man, my life is a mess but I'm kind of back
- the song is quite lighthearted considering the heaviness of the chapter lol
- Also I'll try to write as much as I can but no promises
- (SPOILER: I'm gonna try to quickly resolve... this because I don't like conflict for too long so don't worry. I'm no good author)
- The story of two cowards~
- The exchange was meant to be a lot angrier but it turned sad instead. My bad. depresso things
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Previously:
That one night made Nero's week slightly better but as mentioned before, it turned completely unsalvageable by the end of the week because of one, single day.
Because on that one Friday, Nero witnessed the one thing he hoped, he wished, he prayed to never see.
And that was Sydney and Leo kissing.
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POV: Nero
Let's rewind and explain how I got to that point. I was just simply being a good employee, where I finished off the document that needed to be done ASAP. And then as any good employee would do, I told my leader who told me to take it to the CEO because he's a smug bastard who has the unnecessary need to play matchmaker between us two.
Yeah, that put me in quite the awkward position as I had technically been trying to avoid Leo as of late. Not that he knows that though. Actually, I had been feeling slightly guilty for being a stone cold rock for the past couple of days, even if Leo hadn't noticed it. So I had made up my mind to catch up with him properly for a couple of minutes when I went up. We're pretty good friends and he seems to be cool with leaving some time for me, regardless of how much of a mean, sarcastic bastard I could be sometimes.
With a hefty sigh, I go to take it to the big boss.
Which lead me to witness the dreadful scene right in front of his office, next to Cindy's desk (conveniently, she wasn't there).
Sydney had her arms around Leo's neck as she pulled him down to his level. His face wasn't clear from the distance I was at but it was not of any sort of displeasure. Surprise maybe?
Delighted surprise?
Point was, Sydney was basically eating his face and he was just... letting her? His hands were also situated on her waist, which was quite incriminating.
That's consent if I've ever seen it.
I was frozen mid-step, facing paling at the sight I had been witnessing. In a matter of seconds, I felt my heartbreak. No, I felt my heart shatter into unfixable pieces. I felt the first of many waves of grief wash over me, drying up my mouth and causing my head to throb. A piece of the shattered piece was stuck lodged in my throat, leaving a lump that feels as if it would never leave. While I was in hard denial and truly believed that Leo would never see me in the romantic sense, a little part of me had hope and assumed that we had something. That Leo... saw me more than just a friend.
That little part of me has been trampled along with my heart.
It felt like death and it choked the breath from my lungs and wiped out my brain till it only replayed the awful scene, over and over again.
Once you're shattered, there was only emptiness to feel the holes and I was going to experience it once again after many years.
Once again, I felt inadequate, especially for you.
Goodbye sleep.
It was when I started feeling tears pooling at the corners of my eyes that I jumped into action. I carefully placed the file on the floor because fuck professionalism and yes to stealth. I then bolted out of there as quietly as I could have managed, opting to just dash down the emergency staircase than deal with the elevators.
I needed to run.
But before I go out of the building and scream out at an empty parking lot, I made a group chat consisting of Erwin and Aiden and sent out a simple message.
"You guys were wrong. Fuck you."
Because that's the kind of petty emotional mess that I am.
.
.
.
POV: 3rd Person
Now if Nero stayed five seconds later, he would've managed to clear up the misunderstanding that had popped up.
Leo pushed away Sydney after the initial shock of the completely unexpected kiss (A/N: he's dense like that) and created a respectful distance between the two of them.
"What are you doing?" Leo asked in an even tone.
Sydney's eyebrows furrowed in confusion. "What do you mean? I was kissing you."
"Yeah. Why?"
"What do you mean why?"
Leo's anger was creeping up at a faster rate. "I am asking you... why on earth did you kiss your ex-boyfriend?"
Sydney crossed her arms over her chest, frowning. "Because we can continue the relationship where we left off?"
Leo closed his eyes and pinched his forehead. "And what on earth gave you the idea that I wanted to get back together with you."
"... You don't want to get back together?"
"No Sydney, I bloody don't."
Sydney snapped. "Why not?! We were perfect for each other and we were in love with each other. We only broke up with each other because we had to."
Leo snapped back. "Yeah Sydney. Were. Past tense. Not anymore. Not for a long time."
Sydney's bottom lip trembled. "But... I... I assumed you were waiting for me... I was waiting for you."
Leo sighed. "Then that's on you. We broke up because you weren't sure if you were going to come back and I wasn't going to leave this city. Long-distance is not an option for me and so it was best to end it. There was no mention of waiting for anyone so I have no idea where you got that idea from."
"But... it's me.."
Ah there's the self-entitled persona that she manages to hide from the public eye, Leo thought to himself.
"Regardless of whether it was you or not, I wouldn't have waited for anyone in that circumstance. I have too much on my plate to pine over you from a distance. I'm extremely frustrated why you couldn't express all of this in words rather than just jumping me out of nowhere. Do you understand the misunderstanding you could have created if we were in front of people right now? We are public figures. You can't be reckless like that."
Sydney clutched her fists by her side and growled out, "you... fine you're over me but right now, you're making it sound as if you're not going to give us another go anyway. You know we worked well and we can work well again so why-"
"That's because I have no intentions of giving 'us' another shot."
"Why not?! Do you like someone else?"
"Yes."
Sydney's jaw dropped. "W-What?"
"I have someone else that I desire and would like by my side."
"Who?!"
"That's none of your business now is it?"
"Of course it's my-" Sydney cut herself off before she went hysteric. She took a deep breath and put on her cool persona. "Fine. Does this person know you like them?"
"No."
"Do you know if they like you back?"
"I have my suspicions but once again, that is none of your concerns"
Sydney continued to glare at Leo for a while when suddenly her gaze shifted into something more mellow. Leo's guards are heightened even more at the sudden change. She threw him an ominous smile and moved away from him.
"Okay."
"O...kay?" Leo was confused.
"Okay. You like whoever you like but that doesn't mean I'll give up."
Before Leo could protest further, Sydney walked away with her usual grace.
Leo had an extremely bad feeling about his upcoming future.
.
.
.
Leo's hunch was right.
♤♧♡♢
POV: 3rd Person
"What...?" Leo was frozen in shock and utter bemusement whilst Nero coolly looked back at his now ex-friend-only-boss acquaintance.
Rewind to a couple of moments back
Nothing had been going right for Leo these days. People might be thinking he's just being dramatic about it but Leo disagrees wholeheartedly.
At this present time, life was not in his favour.
Work had been less smooth sailing than usual but the major contributor to the lack of cohesiveness in his life was his personal life.
Mainly, his social life.
There were two main issues.
The first issue was Sydney being an absolute wanker and a pest that no one could get rid of. She was not joking when she said she wasn't going to give up. Ever since that day, she began clinging onto Leo like a damn leech and she just assumed that acting more spoilt would win Leo's favour.
Leo had no idea where she got that from. It just made her more of a pest. He had a feeling she was going for the cute attempt but it was not working in her favour.
He would be seeing her more than some of his regular employees and she refused to listen when Leo told her to 'get the fuck out'. Quoted word for word. Instead, she was completely unfazed and continued to yap on about herself and her life. As per usual.
Honestly, if it wasn't for the forced-upon kiss, Leo wouldn't have actually realised how selfish the world's angel is. She wasn't a saint as all the papers say she is. She was your self-entitled typical celebrity. It made her human but to Leo, an annoying one.
He began pondering if she was always this bad or if it was after her trip and after thinking long and hard about it, this characteristic of hers was always there. It just got a lot worse after coming back and even more enhanced after she got rejected.
Something told him she hasn't gotten rejected a lot before and doesn't know how to cope with it.
Leo wanted to remain friends with her at the very least because they did have quite a few pleasant memories and moments. Be it during or before dating.
But she turned so damn aggravating and Leo couldn't help but see the flaws in her that were a complete turn-off both as a potential friend and lover.
She refused to respect my decision and opinions about Leo's feelings for another and decided to force her entire self upon Leo, as if to silently say she was the best option and no one else.
Which was not true in the slightest. Nero was the best.
Speaking of which. He leads to the second main issue.
Nero was avoiding and Leo had no idea why.
It wasn't obvious by any means. He still replied but over time, the replies became less frequent and a lot drier. There had been multiple attempts where Leo had tried to talk to Nero about it but all of them ended up being failures as it was impossible to get the man alone. At that point, only a blind person wouldn't be able to figure out that they were being blatantly ignored.
So Leo went to confront him about it. Earlier, he had been notified that the other man was staying well overtime to finish off everything so that was the best time to catch him off guard and finally deal with whatever was going on with him.
So jump forward to a couple of hours later and Leo was frozen at the doorway of Nero's general office area. Leo expected to see many things but this wasn't one of them and by no means was it an unpleasant surprise.
Nero was... dancing. He was dancing around the office as if he were in a music video or up on stage. All while somehow doing his work as well? The song was quite upbeat (A/N linked above) so he was spinning, twirling, jumping and doing a whole lot of complicated moves. All while with a smile on his face.
It was a breathtaking scene and Leo couldn't help but lean against the wall and watch with a smitten smile. Nero hadn't noticed his boss standing in the room right up until the song finished.
When he did notice, he was beyond flustered and yelped out, "Le- Mr- Sir!" out of pure shock.
The sudden calling of 'sir' was like a bucket of ice water to Leo and the smile that was once there disappeared and was replaced with a confused frown.
"Sir? Since when did you call me sir?" Leo's confusion remained on his face.
"I- Well I just..." Nero was extremely unnerved and turned off the music before trailing off again. "We're at work so I should..."
Leo said in a deadpanned fashion. "You've never addressed me as my proper title ever since working here."
"E-Exactly. So it's about time that I do." Nerovsky was off balance. The last thing he expected was a confrontation with the man he was actively avoiding. It was constricting. His airways felt tight. He was feeling lightheaded. He was successful nearly and naturally cutting off ties of the other man. Dry messages. Constantly being busy. It was the perfect recipe for the 'friends-naturally-distancing-over-time'. How'd it gone wrong?
"Why?" Leo stepped forward and the other instinctively stepped back, even though there was a considerable distance between them. Alarms went off in Leo's head. The situation was a lot more serious than he initially anticipated. Did he completely mess up somewhere without realising it?
"What do you mean why?" Nero tightened his grip on the papers he was holding, half crumpling the important documents.
"I mean, why now? Why all of a sudden?" Leo wanted to step closer but resisted the temptation to avoid any discomfort for Nero. It was hard to hold back.
"It's just- I-" But Leo wasn't done. He was on a roll and kept pushing the smaller man.
"In fact, why are you avoiding? Why did I have to come here after working hours to finally catch you alone?"
Leo was saying more but Nero's ears were ringing loud enough to drown his words out. His head was throbbing and blanking. He was struggling to breathe. He was hardly ready for any of this. Why was he pushing me? Stop pushing me. I'm sorry. What do you want? I...
Nero couldn't take it anymore and snapped, blurting everything without a filter.
"We should stop!"
Leo snapped his jaw shut and looked at Nero in puzzlement. "Stop? Stop what?"
"Stop... stop being friends or whatever." Nero looked to the sides to avoid any eye contact.
The words were a metaphorical punch to Leo's guts and all the breath left his body in an instance.
"What...?" Leo whispered out, still in shock.
Nero screwed his eyes shut in pain but still refused to turn his head Leo's way. "I don't want to keep feeling like... just we should keep a strictly professional relationship."
Leo couldn't help taking a shaky step forward, beyond lost on what was going on with the person he was infatuated with. "Nero... what is going on?"
Nero doesn't answer the question and pushes on with his rant. "I don't know why you keep... playing with me!" Nero was frustrated and it was evident in his voice. "It's suffocating. You're so... suffocating..." Nero trailed off softly.
Swords were stabbed through Leo's heart at the sudden confession and a sense of desperation started taking over. "What? Toying? Where have I been toying-"
This time Nero looked at Leo with a hard glare. "So we're just going to ignore the fact that you tried to kiss me multiple times and then treated it like it was nothing a couple of minutes later?" Nero spat out.
The last thing the CEO was expecting was the acknowledgment of their near kisses.
"That was just- I wasn't trying to mess with you. I just..." How does Leo explain that he was scared of the aftermath? How does explain that he didn't want to take the risk of getting rejected? He could've used words to explain himself, but said words were failing him.
Nero wasn't listening to him anyway. He was on a roll. "Well it doesn't matter. It clearly never mattered to you to begin with ("that's not true!"). You have your perfect ex back anyway. Getting involved with my boss in a relationship that was more than professional was a mistake. So I'm cashing in the favour from that time (A/N: from chapter 20 I think lol). Please. Leave me alone."
Leo was floored and not in a good way. Definitely not in a good way. He was anxious, panicked and desperate but the crushed and exhausted look on Nero told him that their friendship had taken a toll on him.
His words told Leo that there was once a point in time where they could've had something more but Leo was too much of a coward and now, Nero was tired of him.
It was too late.
Leo backed off, taking a couple of steps back and the room settled into a tense silence. Both men had their hearts palpitating and they both had their hearts shattered.
"...Was it all bad? When we hung out? Were they all suffocating moments?" Leo quietly broke silence with his slightly desperate question.
None. None of it was suffocating. I was lying. What was suffocating was the feelings I have for you and my inability to do something about them. It was suffocating knowing you were right there but I could never I have you. You were never the problem. It was always me. Nero thought all that but never verbalised it. He was a coward.
Instead he lied. Because it was easier. "Not all. Just... half of the time." It physically pained Nero to say any of that.
Leo wasn't stupid and by the pained look on his face, it was obvious that the shorter man was lying. So was he lying about how much of our time was suffocating or if it was suffocating at all? Was he lying about something else completely? I...
It was time he stopped pushing Nero. Leo wanted him in his life but clearly, that would do more harm to Nero than good. Leo gave him a small but sad smile as a goodbye as he said,
"You know... what hurts more wasn't your words but the fact that I'm one of the people that you felt the need to lie to. I don't know why you are lying but It's okay. I am... truly sorry. For making you feel the way you feel right now. I never wanted you to suffer in any way, so I'll respect your wishes and... leave you alone as my company's employee and nothing else. I hope you don't stay too late and take care of yourself... Mr. Poston. Goodbye."
Leonardo turned around and left the floor with heavy footsteps and a lowered head. Once he got to the elevator, he didn't move to press any of the floors. Instead, he blankly looked at his reflection on the closed doors. A few moments later, a tear trail could be seen running down his cheeks.
Nero finally managed to get the one factor that had been making his life but he didn't feel good about it at all. Instead, he felt as if he was drowning in sorrow and pain.
He lost the love of his life.
He dropped onto the floor and began sobbing into the crumpled papers.
This was certainly not how Nero was planning to spend his overtime.