"Hey.", Emily replied shy and got into a sitting position on her hospital bed.
"I'm so sorry.", Hotch couldn't hold this back.
"It's okay the doctors said i will probably be back at work in a week so nothing dramatic.", Prentiss told him while pulling the blanket a bit higher.
"No i mean everything that has happened in the past and i am sorry how i treated you the past few weeks. I should have told you all of this earlier, i should have told you right after i found out that you were the new team member. I didn't know how. I mean how could i ever make up for what i did, i left you with only a note, without giving you the chance to ask me why or anything else. I left you knowing that you were probably asking yourself why you weren't enough, without telling you that it was because of me, because i had a job offer for my dream job.", the words didn't stop coming out of Hotchs mouth.
"Woah wait a minute.", Emily interrupted him confused. "After treating me like i don't even exist for the last few weeks you come into my hospital room after i got kidnapped and tortured, and you tell me this?", she asked upset.
"I am so sorry Em, please let me explain everything, i need you to know what really happened.", Hotch begged while making a few steps towards her.
"Why? Why should i give you this opportunity?", Prentiss asked cold.
"Because i don't want you to think any longer that there was something wrong with you Em.", Hotch now cried. Emily signaled him to sit down on the chair next to the bed and tell her what he wanted to tell her.
"That morning, i sneaked out of your room like always but this time your mother was standing in front of the door. She knew immediately what was going on. I thought that was it, i thought she would call the police as soon as we got to her office, but she gave me the chance to explain the situation to her. I told everything, i told her it was my fault, that i never did something against your will but that i should have known better since i was the one in his twenties and not you. I told her that i loved you but that i realized that we couldn't continue like that because it was wrong. Your mother offered me a deal.", he told her.
"What deal?", the brunette asked curious while she was now on the verge of tears too.
"I could quit immediately, without talking to you again. I wasn't allowed to contact you ever again. I changed my phone number and wrote a letter back to the FBI that i would take the job and i began to pack my stuff immediately and searched for an apartment near Washington D.C. I felt so guilty but i had to think about my career and i also had to think of your reputation. I thought taking the deal your mother offered was the best idea. There wasn't a day i haven't thought about you, i felt so guilty all those years. It hasn't even taken me a week to realize that the deal was a mistake and i should have rather risked it that your mother called the police just so you and i could have had one last conversation.", Hotch explained to her. He looked at her and you could see in his eyes how hard he wanted Emily to reply something but she didn't say anything, she just starred at him while a few tears rolled down her cheeks.
"Em please say something.", he begged desperately.
"What do you want me to say?", she asked while trying to hold the tears back.
"Anything, i just need you to talk to me.", Hotch replied crying.
"I spent all those nights wondering why you left and what was wrong with me, what made you leave so suddenly, why i wasn't good enough, why i didn't even got a proper goodbye. Only because you weren't brave enough to not do what my mother told you to do?", Emily asked upset.
"I know, i am sorry Em. I should have known better. You didn't deserve this.", he said while leaning over to her bed and taking her face in his hands. "You were enough, you were more than enough.", he cried while wiping away a tear, that was running down her cheek, with his thumb, that made her cry even more.
"Please forgive me Emily there is nothing else that i regret as much as leaving you that day without any explanation. I wish i would have been braver, i wish i was as brave as you were.", Hotch pulled her into his arms.
"It's okay.", Emily didn't even try to hold back the tears now, she just let them fall while the man she fell in love with ten years ago, the man that broke her heart like no one else did, held her. Hotch also couldn't stop his tears from falling, there was nothing he could have wished for more than having Emily back in his arms.
"When i heard that you were kidnapped, i thought that was it, that i would never get the chance to tell you what happened. I am so happy you're here, i could have never forgiven myself if you didn't make it out there alive.", Hotch whispered into her ear.
"It's okay, it wasn't your fault, i wanted to do that and i knew about the risks. These bruises will heal and everything will be back to normal.", Emily reassured him, she could now feel how wet his shirt was from her tears but in that moment she didn't care about that,
"It was my fault, i made the decision to bring you into this club to lure him. And now look at yourself... When we got into this basement and i saw you there, all these bruises on your body, the bruise on your neck... What did he do to you?", Hotch sobbed while letting go of her and returning to his chair, but his time he pulled it closer to the bed.
"We don't need to talk about that. You don't need to know what happened. It is only important that i am here now and not still in that basement, i knew that you all would find me.", Prentiss replied, wiping away her tears.
"Did he... Did he ra-", Hotch stuttered.
"No.", Emily interrupted him before he could end his sentence. Hotch nodded relieved without saying anything else.
"Did you tell the team abo-", Emily wanted to know but this time it was Hotch that interrupted her: "No i didn't tell them anything, i thought you would want to have a say in that too. Only Rossi knows, he got behind it and questioned me while we were waiting for news from your doctor.", he explained.
"Okay thank you.", Prentiss replied while grabbing a paper towel to get rid of the last of her tears.
"Do you want them to know?", Aaron asked her.
"I think for now its better if we don't tell them.", she answered.
"Okay if you don't want them to know that's fine.", Hotch told her honest.
"What about Rossi?", the brunette asked worried.
"He won't tell anyone, if there's someone you can trust it is Rossi.", he reassured her.
"Alright.", Emily sighed. "When will you fly back?", she asked.
"When are you free to go?", Hotch wanted to know.
"They just wanna run some more tests, i can probably be discharged before six this evening. At least that is what the doctor told me.", Prentiss answered his question.
"I guess then we will fly back tomorrow morning.", Hotch said while looking down on his hands.
"Stop feeling guilty.", Emily told him while grabbing one of his hands, which made him look up.
"I guess I'll forever feel guilty no matter what you say.", he sighed.
"It wasn't your fault, not what happened now and not what happened back then. If it was someone's fault and then it was our boths fault.", Prentiss reassured him.
"Emily i can't get the picture out of my head how you stood there tied onto this fence, you looked so lifeless, for a minute i thought... I thought we were to late.", Aaron said and a few tears fell down again.
"I am okay, i mean we are talking right now so that means i am alive right?", she laughed a little.
"Yes you are alive but are you really okay?", her boss asked worried.
"The doctors said so.", Emily answered his question.
"You know that i don't mean your physical health.", he replied.
"I went through worse, i will be okay, i promise.", Prentiss said. " But you look tired.", she added concerned.
"I haven't slept since yesterday morning.", Aaron confessed.
"You should go back to the hotel and sleep.", Emily said to him.
"Are you sure that you wanna stay here alone?", he asked her worried.
"It's fine. JJ will pick me up later and until then i can stay here alone. You all deserve to get some sleep.", she told him.
Okay if you need something, let me know.", Hotch replied while standing up.
"I will be fine, don't worry.", Prentiss told him.
"See you tonight.", Hotch said while opening the door, he made it sound more like a question, hoping that he would get to see her again today.
"See you tonight.", Emily smiled while he left.