I wake up without Ryujin next to me. Why does she wake up so early? Then I remember that Eva wakes up early. I don't remember ever waking up early every time I'm with Ryujin. Even when Ervin cries she gets to him before I can even process what's going.
I did ask her once why she always takes care of the kids in the morning and she told me because I've done it enough while I was with Dana. I did try to argue, saying it was only about two years so it wasn't that long and she said that she will do this for two years at least then maybe she will let me help.
I think about yesterday's events and I can't help but smile. The wedding, the reception, just everything. It wasn't anything fancy but it felt so special.
I get up to get Ervin. We're sharing the same room with the kids since our house is still being built. We could have stayed at the house by the lake but this just seems more convenient and more comfortable. We are leaving for our honeymoon later though so Ryujin and I will have some quality time with just the two of us. At first, I was worried that Eva wouldn't agree but she likes being around the Shins so it wasn't that hard to convince her to stay.
We leave early in the afternoon to go to California for our honeymoon. We can't travel outside of the states due to my status right now. Ryujin also wanted to introduce me to her cousins that couldn't make it to the wedding.
My family doesn't leave until tomorrow though. It honestly brings me so much joy how much the Shins have accepted not only me but also my family as a whole. My dad and Ryujin's dad talk about sports and hunting a lot. My mom is still a bit hesitant with things but she's getting better. The more she sees me with Ryujin, the more she realizes that she's good for me. My sister and Travis are already planning their next visit here. I seriously think they're considering moving here.
The Shins even offered Travis a job and are willing to sell part of their property so they can build a house.
I decide to head downstairs to see what Ryujin and Eva are up to. Eva has taken an interest in cooking so Ryujin has been teaching her how. Whenever Ryujin is cooking, Eva is there watching her. Ryujin would then explain what to do and what not to do. She even got Eva a knife that's pretty safe for kids. It cuts food but it won't cut their fingers off.
I didn't even think about teaching Eva to cook at such a young age but I guess she did the same thing with Gabe. He can pretty much cook a full meal by himself. He still needs supervision since he's not allowed to turn on the stove by himself and he can't reach everything he needs.
I find it crazy at times though that Eva seems more like Ryujin's kid than she is Dana's or sometimes even mine. The two have become best friends.
I find Ryujin and Eva in the kitchen, probably making breakfast.
I see Eva, being a kid, making a mess everywhere thinking it's fun.
"What happened dada?" Eva has the audacity to ask knowing what she just did.
Ryujin doesn't say anything and just looks at Eva.
"I made a mess" Eva says.
"You did. So what do you have to do now?" Ryujin calmly ask.
"Clean it up" Eva happily says.
"Yes, when we make a mess whether by accident or on purpose, we have to clean up after ourselves" Ryujin states.
"Do you want me to help?" Ryujin ask.
"Yes please" Eva smiles.
Ryujin talked to me into doing this gentle parenting thing and it seems to work with Eva. We don't get mad at the kids and we don't yell or spank. We talk to them. We explain why things are bad and that when you do things you're not supposed to then there will be consequences.
Ryujin also emphasizes to Eva and Gabe, since the other kids are still babies, the importance of consent. Whenever they don't want to be touched, hugged or kissed, then they make sure to voice that out.
Another thing I really enjoy with what Ryujin is doing is that she's teaching them to express their emotions, to not hold it in. She teaches them that we can't be happy every day and there's some days where we're just sad even if there's no specific reason.
I struggled so much with expressing my emotions as a child so I'm very happy that Eva will have a healthy way of expressing her feelings. Ryujin also makes sure that the kids feel valid when they express how they're feeling.
One time, Gabe was upset because his toy wouldn't fit together properly so he started smashing it until it broke. Ryujin went up to him and asked what happened first. Gabe then explained his frustrations. Ryujin never made him feel bad for being violent or aggressive. She just asked, if he could have handled the situation better and Gabe understood.
I was honestly surprised by Gabe's response because for a kid to realize that is amazing. He told Ryujin that he should have walked away and took a break until he calms down then come back to see if he can make it work.
He then apologized to Ryujin but she just told him that it's okay. We're humans and sometimes we lash out but she made it clear that it doesn't make it okay but it sometimes happens and we can learn from it to better ourselves in the future.
"So, Eva we keep our hands away from the blade. Knives are dangerous and we never play with them. I'm letting you use your knife today but the moment I see you're not being safe then were done okay?" I hear Ryujin explain to Eva.
"Dada, it's my first time using a knife" Eva says.
"Yes but I think you're ready. I've taught you and showed you things that you shouldn't do. I'll also be here to keep you safe, okay? But if you really don't want to do it then I'm not making you, okay? Only if you want to" Ryujin says.
"I wanna do it" Eva says so Ryujin hands her the kid knife.
I finally speak up, "Is that safe?"
I sit down on the chair at the dining table while Ervin is in my arms.
"Yes" she looks at Eva as she borrows the kid knife "see" she tries to slice her hand but it doesn't cut her.
Before she hands it back to Eva, "Don't do what I just did, okay? I was just showing mommy that your knife is kid friendly but we will treat this as an adult knife. Right?" Ryujin explains.
"Right" Eva aggressively nods her head.
"Before you start though, I have to do something" Ryujin says so I look at her weirdly.
She approaches me then leans down so our faces are in front of each other, "Good morning, beautiful" she smiles then kisses me on the lips.
"Really? You had to stop just for that?" I chuckle.
"Of course, a day without a morning kiss is just not a good start of the day" she kisses me one more time before going back to Eva.
I get up so I can make Ervin's bottle since he's fully awake now. I carefully watch Eva and Ryujin because even though I trust them, I still have to make sure that Eva is doing okay.
"What smells good?" Travis walks in.
"Oohh, is breakfast for everyone?" Travis stands next to Ryujin to watch Eva cook breakfast.
It's messy and slow but she's trying. Ryujin has had to help a few times because some things are heavy or too hard for Eva.
"Cook your own breakfast. Eva is cooking breakfast for her and her mommy" Ryujin pushes Travis away.
"You're not gonna eat?" Travis ask.
"I already had something earlier" Ryujin answers.
"Where's Karina?" I ask.
"She's in the living room. She wanted to come here early to make sure that she sees you before you leave but TJ had a little explosion in the diaper so we're having a fun morning" Travis chuckles while stealing a piece of bacon.
"Why aren't you helping clean him up then?" Ryujin ask.
"Because she's in one of those mood where I do nothing right. It's like I love you but go away" he sits down next to me.
"Good morning Ervin" he baby talks my child.
"Are you two ready for your honeymoon? Gonna do some mattress dancing?" Travis smirks.
"What's mattress dancing?" Eva ask.
"It's nothing, baby. Uncle Travis is just saying nonsense" Ryujin glares at Travis and I pinch his arms.
"Tough crowd. Jeez" he laughs.
Ryujin and Eva finish cooking and they place a plate in front of me. We start eating then my sister joins us. Travis grabs her some food while she talks to us about the things Travis did that annoyed her.
It may seem like she complains a lot about him but you can still tell how much she loves him. Travis just appreciates that even when he does something Karina might find stupid, she doesn't try to change him.
After breakfast, we spend some time with Eva and Ervin since we're leaving soon. This will be the first time that I will be away from my kids and this will be the longest time too. I'm gonna miss them so much but I know they'll be in good hands.