I...I was a bad wife, a useless one. Yes, I never gave anything to Lucian and there was nothing I could give him now either, on top of that because of my selfishness I could cause his death.
Klara was right, I didn't even offer him my body and got angry when he went to someone else. I was indeed selfish. I didn't have the right to be angry when he never got angry with me for not sleeping with him. The only thing I have done so far is being scared or jealous.
What really have I done for him? What great have I done so that I could tell him not to marry someone else because I am good enough? I couldn't say that because I wasn't.
"My lady? Are you alright? You look very pale." The maid who brushed my hair asked.
"I am alright." I said.
"Should I bring dinner? Maybe you are hungry."
"No I am fine. I'll go to sleep."
I was running in the middle of the night through the dark woods where I could barely see where I was going, but I didn't care. I had to run if I wanted to survive, if I wanted to see Lucian again.
"Kill her!"
I was running barefoot and my feets were bleeding and hurting but I couldn't stop since I could hear they were close. I had to run faster or they would catch me.
"There she is! Bring her!"
No no no! please!!
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I tried to run faster but my feet and lungs gave in and I fell to the ground.
The footsteps were very close and shortly after two hands grabbed my arms and dragged me on the floor.
"Your majesty, I got her." A man said.
"Good" A woman's voice said. "Love? We found her. What should we do with her?"
A tall man appeared from the shadows and put his arm around the womans waist.
"Do wherever you want with her." He said in a voice that sent chills down my spine. Then he looked at me his eyes burning with what looked like the flames of hellfire.
"Fine kill her!" The woman said as her lips twisted into an evil smile.
The tall man walked toward me and crouched to my level. Grabbing my chin he lift my head up.
"I am sorry love, but you are not good enough." He whispered before he stood up and turned around to leave.
"Please Lucian, please don't leave me." I called but he didn't even look back.
"Lucian! Lucian!! Please don't leave.Don't leave me."
Suddenly it was day and I was running again. Petrified but not for my life but for someone else's.
"Nooo!!" I screamed as I ran toward Lucian who was sitting on his knees with his hands tied behind his back. He looked at me his eyes filled with hatred. A guard with a sword stood behind him ready to execute him anytime.
"Noo.." I screamed crying and running toward him but someone grabbed me by the arm.
"Let go!" I screamed.
"Stop it!" Klara said holding me still. "It is all your fault, I told you, you would get him killed." As she said the word killed the sound of a sword cutting through flesh and and the smell of blood made my heart stop.
"No...no no noooo!!"
Lucian heard Hazel's scream and run to the chamber as fast as he could. He threw the door open and found Hazel sitting on the bed her cheeks wet with tears and eyes wide in fear and confusion.
When she caught sight of him.
"Lucian!" She said breathless and ran toward him enveloping him in a tight hug. He put his arms around her small figure and held her close while he stroke her back.
She began to sob in his arms. She must have had the worst nightmare.
"Shh..It's alright. I am here now." He whispered, but she only hugged him tighter.
"Please don't leave." She cried.
"I won't." He said.
After holding her for a while till she calmed down then he gathered her in his arms and carried her to bed. She still held on to him as if she was scared he would disappear into thin air. He slowly laid her down on bed and led next to her still holding her in his arms.
He wanted to ask her about her dream but he wanted to give her the chance to tell him first. Or maybe she didn't want to talk about it at all. What had scared her so?
If there was one reason he wanted the crown it would be to give Hazel a good life. He wanted to be able to give her anything she asks for, he wanted to make her smile and love her till she had enough. Otherwise he had no desire to become a king. He actually wanted to try and live freely like a normal man in a small house with his wife and children.
Wake up, kiss his wife and children goodmorning then leave for work and when he comes back tired have dinner with his family while talking about pleasant thing. Then he would take his children to bed and kiss them goodnight but his wife, he would do more then kissing. He would make love to her all night long.
But he knew none of this would happen. He would either get killed or become a king. And when he grows old while ebing busy ruling the kingdom his children would fight for the throne and kill each other.
The thought brought great pain to his chest.
He looked at Hazel, she had gone back to sleep breathing peacefully. He listened to her breathing , it always made him calm and slowly he fell asleep as well.
I woke up in morning my cheek pressed against Lucian chest. The sound of his steady heartbeat and the feeling of his arms around me making me want this moment to last forever. Slowly the peace I felt began to fade as memories of the nightmare from last night came back. It felt like a stab in the heart and I sat up quickly. As if Lucian was never sleeping he sat up right after me.
"Is something wrong?" He asked.
I just shook my head and he drew me into his arms. I had to let him marry Klara. Yes the thought of sharing him with someone else was unbearable but the thought of losing him completely, the thought of causing his death just like in my dream, I shuddered at the memory, that would kill me.
"Lucian?"
"Yes"
"I don't mind you marrying Klara."