"You-You've changed Barrister babu, YOU.HAVE.CHANGED!" Bondita mournfully lamented making Anirudh's whole entity shudder in its core thence agonizingly slackening his grip around her waist.
"B..Barrister babu This isn't you, You aren't My Barrister babu...", she exclaimed wholly disintegrated while Anirudh just stood there installed like a lifeless mannequin, all languidly floating into the sea of melancholy and dejection, his mannish visage was devoid of any sort of nuance albeit he could feel his heart shatter into countless fragments at the sight of his Beloved shedding tears grievously and his entire being knew it was because of him...his intentionally inflicted, vulnerable wounds that he was now trying abrade with his words, mercilessly.
"You, You don't trust me any-any more, You don't Trust me..", she cried inconsolably, robustly clutching her head between her palms, the surreal ambience around, the one she thought to be romantic! had now wickedly swap its pristine essence with the one of those heartaches and gut-wrenching austerity. She crumpled on the hard floor, all tormented. She hadn't ever envisioned in the worst of her nightmares that Love could be this anguishing but probably 'Love isn't only about trust and faith but about how one can let go of his\her own possessions just for the welfare of the other', therefore, she was downright unwary of this!
"B..Barrister babu, You've ruined it all The trust,The faith The L..Love The diligence. EVERYTHING! You've ruined it! How can you even think of this Me with Some other How could you?? Why Barrister babu? Why...?", she wailed hopelessly, mustering her courage up, she stood back on her feeble, shuddering legs that had weakened because of ultimate agony he caused her.
"Tell me,Barrister babu How effortly we'd laid the foundation this beautiful bond, remember, how firm endeavors we'd put in to build this up? You only told me that it won't give way, even if the raw storms harm it, even if the nasty downpours try to destroy it, this was meant to last for an eternity; then how...can just eight years deface it...disintegrate it? Why don't you answer me...?Barrister babu...Why are you standing like a lifeless doll? Answer me, I beg you...", she bawled incessantly, mildly yanking at his arms as if trying to bring him back to his senses.
"Barrister Babu...Why are you not speaking? You only told me, right?That it solely depends on a girl how she designs her own conduct, then why just...just shaking hands with a mere guy...is affecting you so much? Tell..me..will you? Barrister babu..."she whined relentlessly, making her frail tugs on his arms.
"I..I think I know..the truth...And..it is tha..that 'You don't trust me any longer' And, let me.. tell you Barrister Sahab, A bond begins with trust and ends with it, and wherethere's no trust...there's no relationship! I'll no longer chase you like a fool. You're liberated now! a free bird you are. Also, Be happy now Since You're no longer responsible for this hapless child bride..the one you were compelled to marry! no more responsible.", she grumbled, all heartbroken, afterall, she'd faced the first rejection of her entire life, a rejection which can't even be called one! She dolorously turned about to leave, her gut-wrenched at whatever she'd gone through, and that too, today itself.
As she stood at the crossover of the patio, she turned back to him, stagnant at her place.
"Congratulations,Bachelor Babu.", she stated; her words fiercely reflected acute mockery, and then... she sailed with the barbaric, nasty winds like a stream of melancholic breeze herself.
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Anirudh in the due course seemed like a soulless body...a body which'd suffered a massive blood drainage, a body sans its heart! He felt infirm...he felt frail! Her words were like serrated stabs that directly spiked his core howbeit only he knew how these eight years went like ;felt like! And, the question to him was of 'Trust'! He may have had umpteen qualms about himself ,his entity, but he never mistrusted her, he so, got her enrolled in the University overseas, far away from him! Just because he 'trusted' her, more than he ever did himself.
He, therefore, didn't wanted to impose their relationship on her, even though he loves her like nobody else, but still, he suppressed his emotions just to give her wings; the flight of their ambitions and dreams they saw with open eyes! He, enfeebled, sank down on his quivering knees, while his whining heart let out a muted squall...a squall of every shade; every tint of melancholy and despair. He too had somewhat gone through a doleful breakup from someone he admired or say, Loved through all his heart, all his soul!
He knew that their love; their relationship would germinate only sufferings for her! And, thus, he had no other option! He still was proud, infact very proud! As, he somewhere in her love for him, saw ambitions and aspirations in her naive yet charming orbs, her appealing persona that blazingly radiated fire in every sense.. whether love or revolution! He was still in awe with her ravishing yet bold ability to catechize recklessly, she was still the same old Bondita!
"Bravo...Bondita Bravo! My Barris...Barrister Babu Bondita!", he cheered like an insane fellow, clapping and applauding while his tears incessantly drizzled like fresh raindrops!
"I made you shed tears..Bondita, I am no good at all Good at nothing I am a monster, a flesh-hungry devil!", he bawled morosely, thwacking himself harder and harder until his hand felt feeble and cheeks reddened- numb.
"B..But you don't know Bondita,How these eight years went like! You...You don't know! Everything has changed,and So have I...I didn't want to hurt you more Bondita, you've already gone through a lot..a lot!" he thunderously screeched, or rather say his heart did!
"I am not worth your time Bondita..Even if you try to change me and succeed in it.. and that I know you will, but..but will they let us live peacefully; these barbaric fellows? Our love will only give you endless sufferings my beloved..nothing.nothing else..! I can't be that selfish to have kept your whole life at stake and how can I? Just momentary happiness and euphoria will come with endless adversities; agony! And, before watching you suffer I'd prefer to embrace death itself!"
"An- and How can you even think I'd be skeptical about you..your gestures? I trusted you more than I ever did myself! These 8 long years weren't anything but like an eternal imprisonment sentence to me, I used to explain my poor pining heart that I'll wrap you up in a tight-bear embrace the day you return as a Barrister...as my Barrister Babu! I'd even talked with your cherubic photographs ,the memories you'd left behind! Then, how dare me be that selfish; that mean? I want you to hate me; Hate me like no one ever did, I don't deserve a pure soul like you!
"This Anirudh may never get his Bondita but,I strongly wish that Bondita finds the perfect 'One' for her!, He squalled soundlessly, rigidly clasping his head in between his palms.
"You need not waste your time on meor chase me..
"'Cause, Every Beast doesn't deserve a Beauty...!"
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सारा जग छड़ के बस तेनु ही है चुनेया......... सारा जग छड़ के बस तेनु ही है चुनेया..........बस तेनु ही है चुनेया तेनु ही है चुनेया .........लाख कहा दिल नु पर फेर वि है अड़ेया .......लाख कहा दिल नु पर फेर वि है अड़ेया........💘
हो बह गया हंजुआं दा दरया ....तेरे लई की की नैय करेया .......वेख जीते जी मैं मारिया .....हो बह गया हंजुआं दा दरया!
The English Translation👇
leaving the whole world,
(my heart) just chose you.
I told my heart a million times,
but it didn't listen to me.
and a river of tears flowed off...
I did everything for you,
look, I'm dying even while living,
a river of tears has just flowed.
The above mentioned song clearly represented their feelings, the mental suffering they are lately going through...For some of my readers, this song may really be intriguing as per the language disparity but its soulful, Do listen it, I am attaching the link above!
Also do present your views or any criticism with regard to the above written chapter, they're cordially invited. Looking forward!
Love and sheer love,
Piya💛
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