Your heart is hurting.
Very soon, you will be done with filming on this location. What will you do now? Where will it leave you? You don't want to go home, you simply don't. You have been able to breathe these last four months-even with the craziness of a job you love and a whirlwind turned very real romance with Henry. You've even begun writing again when Henry is busy studying scripts or gaming. Life is good. You need to extend your visa, but how?
When you finally tell Henry how you feel one night as you sit in the window looking out over the countryside, he simply says, "We'll find a way, I've no doubt of it." He is quiet for a moment.
"What?"
"You've never told me, love," he says softly.
"What?"
"Why you left the States," he looks at you. "Why you don't seem to want to go home."
"Do you want me to go home?"
"I want you to answer my question."
You sigh. "I had a job I loved but I wasn't going to get promoted. I was struggling as a writer and stressing. My love life? Let's not go there. My family had me in Cinderella mode. My great uncle passed, left me money, and I bolted."
"You left?"
"Some say I ran away."
He was quiet. "Do you feel you did?"
"I send money every month," you shrug. "I send emails, I text."
"But no face to face?"
"No."
"Why?"
"I don't know."
"How did you leave?" he asks, then gives a sarcastic smirk. "Did you call from the airport?"
You don't answer. That's exactly what you did. You paid off your bills, left a card to transfer money to for them, packed, and left. You were getting ready to board when they started calling you.
He gasps. "That's...that's..." he shakes his head at you. "there are things you aren't telling me."
"Just that they thought I'd be there forever, nothing would change for me ever," you sigh, feeling tears come to your eyes.
"So you took the bull by the horns, and made a run for it," he nods.
"I didn't know what else to do," you whisper tearfully. "I felt like I was dying, my dreams were dying. I was so scared if I didn't do something I'd be too scared to do anything."
He smiles at you. "So..."
You mirror his smile. "I heard about the con, the panel. I thought, 'bucket list.' I'd been to Europe before during my eighteenth summer, and I loved it. I always wanted to return. Suddenly, after my job put me on furlough because of Covid, I thought, 'run.'"
"And I found out you were here because you posted it on social media," he smiles. "Finding who you really were wasn't hard."
"I never thought anyone cared to look," you shrug.
"I did," he grins. "Those stories were so fun and sexy, I had to at least lay eyes on you once."
"And what did you think?"
"I was right."
You frown.
"Warm, intelligent, sexy," he smiles. "Nice eyes."
"I didn't know what to make of you," you smile back. "I just wanted to see for myself."
"What?"
"Were you really that good looking or was it editing?" you joke. "What was real and what was image."
"Wow, you were going to get all that?"
"A little difficult once I got on the panel," you say. "I expected to do straight observation, not interact."
"Good Lord, but you are a scientist at times," he shakes his head. "so why pick me to write about?"
"A lot of it had to do with your acting," you say. "I just picked up as much as I could from your roles and interviews. You displayed some sensitivity, definite masculinity and intelligence, and constantly evolving leadership skills. You just seemed very...desirable, so you were a natural muse, someone who could respect strength, but still step in when need be." You watch him smile and laugh. "Are you blushing?!"
He bends forward laughing harder. "IT's just that...yeah, a fan would say that, but it really feels good when someone gets to know me and still feels the same." He blinks at you. "Doesn't happen often." His eyes twinkle at you. "I loved when you suggested we go to Geoffrey's and you made those Dagwoods. Most would be like, 'let's go out and be seen,' but you wanted me to relax, for us to relax."
"You liked my crappy PC building games and task management games, or pretended to."
"You endured my fantasy ones, even when you cringed at the blood."
"You were okay when I wanted to work on stories."
"You were okay when I wanted to be in my mancave."
You stare at each other.
"I'm not letting you go," he shakes his head. "We'll find a way, I promise."
During your last week on the movie set, everyone is packing what is no longer required. Henry was cleared to move on to the next site for studio work, so you were on your own with Luna, who missed him all the time.
"So what are you gonna do about Stuart?" you ask Stella one day at lunch. "He lives here."
Stella swallows hard, and says, "He says we can keep in touch, make a go of a long distance relationship."
"What do you think of that?"
"I don't know," she confesses. "I think I can do it, no problem. I traveled all this time and he is the first person I dared to get to know. But what if the next movie company has a girl in it he likes? I don't want to be cheated on."
"Yeah," you nod.
"Oh, my God," Stella gasps softly. "you and Henry!"
"What?"
"Well, what are you going to do about him?"
"Oh, him? The visa? All of it."
"Oh, I forgot about that," she says apologetically.
"He says we'll find a way for me to stay longer."
"He said 'we?'" Stella's eyes go wide.
"Yes," you smile gently.
"Well, that means he cares," Stella got that soft 'awww' look on her face. "He's not done with you, and doesn't seem to know when he will be."
"Not knowing presents a lot of doubts," you say slowly, losing eye contact with her.
She takes your hands in hers. "Be positive," she says. "You always told me you wished for love, someone you feel good about being good to. Isn't that him?"
"He seems that way," you say, but your heart warms with the truth of yes.
"Don't be afraid, okay?" Stella squeezes your hands. "You've come so far. See it all through. Who knows where you'll end up?"
Stella, Stuart, Archer, Hannah and you spend your hours after work building shelters for the cats you have been feeding. You leave a note for whomever rents the house to feel free to leave food for the cats and someone would see to them. Between you all you have spayed and neutered about twenty cats since you arrived.
Your last day on the set was full of goodbyes, and exchanged contact information. You feel a little sad, having gone through this when the actors departed. All Henry has to do is not respond to anything you send and that could be that. You quell your fears; they are nothing new, and you have been through this, but now...it seems...bigger. It's not just your pride that is on the line-to hell with that-it's your heart.
As the couples all slowly peel off to spend the rest of their final evenings in private, you go to your home over the garage. You are going to miss it, you think as you fill containers with food, change the cat litter and double check the water dispenser. You are trying to figure out where to go with Luna. If you go back to Palmer House you can't take her. Stuart and Archer offered to take her and you may have to take them up on that. You bought a pet store gift card with enough money on it to keep her for a year at the very least.
You slowly go up the steps and think how so much seems to be ending. You are trying to think of potential beginnings but they always seem clearer at sunrise than under any moon. You see the lights on and you can't remember if you left it on or not before you gathered with all the assistants at the backyard bar and grill night you had. You open the door and gasp.
"Hi, sweetheart."