Two weeks later
There she was again at the unknown placed that she was stuck in. Every time she got stuck in there. A Vacant place. Nothing was in there. Not even a way out. That time though, she saw a fuzzy image appearing in front of her eyes. A figure was walking in her direction but she couldn't figure out what it was. The place was too illuminated so she narrowed her eyes to cope with the intense light. Her head hurt so much all the time. As the figure approached it started looking less like just a shadow and more like a man. Ellie looked around trying to recognize the place where she was once again but there was nothing around her, just an intense light. She felt so lost.
"Chris?" She called, looking around. A sudden despair took care of her and she gasped for air. It had been so hard to breathe. "Chris?" She said again and span around in that vacant place. "Where am I?" She whispered. "Why am I here? I am stuck here..." She suddenly wanted to yell.
Ellie turned again and looked at the man that walked slowly towards her. That's when she noticed some familiar gestures. There was something familiar in that person. The quiet way of walking, the way the hair was flowing in the hair. His starry pants. Ellie smiled and tears came to her eyes.
"Andy?" She called and started walking in his direction. "Andy?" She yelled seeing his figure clearer. Her cousin stopped and he smiled at her. Ellie covered her mouth with her hands to prevent her from yelling out loud. "Andy..." She gasped. "Andy..."
"Hi, Ellie." He responded with his cheeky smile. "Hey, beautiful." Andy greeted her the way he always did.
"What are you doing here?" Ellie asked him, gazing at him for head to toe. It had been so long since she last had seen him.
"I came to ask you the same thing." Andy pointed at her. "What are you doing here?"
"You came to pick me up?" Ellie asked him, looking around her again. "Is this the other side?" She paused and looked around her again. "I'm stuck here... I don't know for how long but I am stuck here..."
"What the fuck are you doing here, Ellie?" Andy asked her, and she looked once more at him with a confused look.
"I guess I died." Ellie told him and shrugged "But I didn't want to..."
"I didn't come here to pick you up, moon..." Andy smiled at her. "... I came here to kick your ass out of here."
Moon... how she missed him calling her that. In fact, seeing Andy made her realize how much she was missing him in general. Ellie stretched her hand to caress his face. It seemed so unreal to be able to actually touch him. He hadn't changed. He still had his childish features. His cheeky smile.
"I miss you." She told him. "I miss you so much..."
"I am so sorry..." Andy said. "I didn't mean it."
"I know my sweet star." Ellie responded. "Chris was devastated. I hope you understand why he still hasn't visited you at the cemetery."
"He's my brother. I hear everything he tells me, Ellie. Everything..." Andy told her.
"Why can't I stay with you?" She then asked him. "I want to stay with someone I love."
"No..." Andy caressed Ellie's cheek. "... you can't stay with me." He told her while she was listening attentively. "What the hell are you even doing here? He needs you with him!"
"Chris..." Ellie whispered and looked around her again feeling despaired. "I left Chris..." She shook her head and she took both hands to it. "I left Chris alone... I am here alone..." She cried almost in panic. "I want him... I don't want to leave him... I need him..."
"Calm down." Andy grabbed both of her hands and she looked at him with her eyes wide opened. Scared, Ellie was completely scared and lost, he could tell.
"He needs you and your baby girl needs you too." Andy affirmed "You can't stay here, Ellie. You have to go back."
"But I can't come back... I can't..." She cringed. "I tried and I always end up here alone." She looked around her again. "There's nothing... there's light... light that blinds you even... there's not a door... nothing..."
"My mission is to kick your ass back to them." Andy smirked. "I guess I am your door, moon."
"I want to see my baby girl grow up." Ellie told him. Andy nodded, placing both his hands on her shoulders.
"You're going to see her grow." Andy smiled and nodded. "She's so beautiful, Ellie. But be prepared, your baby daughter looks like him ..." He giggled. Ellie realized again how she missed his laughter, his good spirits. "She yells like him too."
"Chris is gorgeous, so I don't mind that she looks like him." Ellie told him. Then, Andy's semblance changed to a concerned one. "What is it?" She asked.
"He needs you, Ellie. That crazy guy loves you more than anything." Andy told her.
"And I love him." Ellie whimpered.
"Yeah..." Andy nodded. "I know you do, but Chris's head works in different ways."
"What are you trying to tell me?" Ellie asked.
"Listen to what I am going to tell you..." He looked straight into her eyes. "You need to save him." After his words, Ellie curled an eyebrow.
"What do you mean?" She asked, feeling her chest heavy suddenly.
"I can't tell you more than this." Andy said. "I just know that a time will come when Chris needs you to save him. You have to be there with him. Ellie, you MUST be there with him. Don't leave him alone."
"You're scaring me." Ellie exclaimed.
"I need to warn you..." Andy told her. "It's gonna take years yet but pay attention to him, Ellie." With that he kissed her forehead and Ellie closed her eyes feeling the soft touch of his lips. "Now, go back to him... go..."
"How?" Ellie shrugged and started looking around. "How do I come back?"
"Just open your eyes, Ellie." Andy almost ordered her and turned around to leave.
"Don't go..." Ellie pleaded. "Don't leave me here alone."
"Go back to him." He said and he started walking away.
"Chris..." Ellie whispered. "Chris..."
Chris entered the hospital's room to find her as he had left her before he went out for a smoke. Motionless. Tubes all over her. Tubes in her arms, tubes down her throat, in her nose. The beep of her heartbeat was steady, he knew that now by heart but he couldn't stand that sound anymore. Tears came to his eyes as he sat by her bed and then held her hand. He cried himself to sleep every night holding onto her pillow. Sometimes he drank himself to sleep and one time he was taken to the hospital to clean his stomach for he had taken more pills than prescribed and Millie found him on his bed foaming through his mouth. If it hadn't been for Heaven crying nonstop, it could have been fatal. He claimed it had been accidental, that he had mixed it with alcohol, but since then Millie kept a closer eye on him. Nothing similar ever repeated though. He barely ate. He barely talked. Still, he spent time with his daughter and was tender and caring. The only times Millie saw him smiling were the times he was with the baby.
"Hey, babe." Chris's voice trembled and he tried to sustain his crying. His free hand caressing her hair. "I'm here, babe... I am here with you. I miss you so much." Then, he paused and looked at her. It looked like she was just sleeping.
"I wish you could hear me..." He said.
"Chris..." Ellie whispered. "Chris... I can hear you..." She said looking around trying to find a way out of that place. "Babe..."
"Can you hear me, Ellie?" He asked her with his lips trembling. "Give me a sign, babe." He held her hand in his still. "Squeeze my hand, babe." He asked and looked down at their hands. "Please... Ellie..." His voice failing as he sobbed so low.
"I want to, Chris..." Ellie was desperate. "I just can't... I can hear you..."
After waiting for a long minute, he took a deep breath and closed his eyes as if convincing himself that nothing was going to change. After his moment of self-awareness, he raised his head again and looked at her face.
"Your sister went on tour with Eddie today." Chris started telling her the news, as he usually did. "She wanted to stay but she is so down, Ellie that your mother thought it was best if she'd go with him. Without his support she could get worse. You know..." He paused. "... she could go back to her depression... she fought it back but Eddie convinced her and your mother also talked to her. So, she is flying to Europe but she has you in her heart."
"Chris..." Ellie kneeled down on a tremendous light and covered her face with her hands, she sobbed. "I'm so lost without you..."
"Our daughter gave me one hell of a night today, like every other night." He giggled. "She's terrible at sleeping, you better be prepared for that. She likes it when I sing to her, you know? She calms down a bit. She loves it when I lean her over my shoulder, and when I talk to her too. She hates bathing..." He chuckled a bit there. "She cries a lot when we have to bathe her. She also likes it when I take her to the garden and stay there talking to her. She looks at me with her tiny blue eyes wide open. I wish you could see her... I bet she misses her mommy. I do my best but I guess it's not the same thing. You have to come back, Ellie..." Chris's voice failed there. "Please come back, for her. She's so beautiful... she's the most amazing thing I have ever seen. She's amazing... our daughter is so perfect. We did a wonderful job." He paused to clean his eyes and then continued talking.
"Come back to me..." He told her. "I don't know how to live without you, Ellie. I don't want to live without you. I need you. I love you so much, babe. I have been holding on because I have Heaven and I can't fail her but I just want to go to wherever you are. I just want to be with you. None of this makes sense if you're not here to share it with me."
"No, Chris... no..." Ellie yelled almost in panic.
"I don't want to live without you." He affirmed with tears running down his face. "And I won't..."
"NO!" Ellie yelled. "Chris... no..."
"Your parents are staying at our house with me...." He continued. "Your mother has been very helpful with Heaven. You know I never had a baby before so she helps me. They also miss you. Do you know that Heaven smiled today? Your mother says she was dreaming, because she's just two weeks old but I swear that she did that when she heard my voice talking to her. Usually, she calms down when I talk to her. She stops crying when she hears me. She's so amazing. You have to come back for us... our life is not complete if you're not here."
Then, Chris heard steps on the hallway and cleaned his eyes quite fast not to be seen crying. As the steps became closer, he knew it was someone approaching Ellie's bedroom. Soon, Millie appeared at the door, bringing Heaven with her. Millie perceived he had been crying. His eyes were so read, but what it stood out more were the black halos around them. Chris looked destroyed and he barely let anyone in.
"Hi." Chris greeted her.
"How is she?" Millie asked him as she stopped near him.
"The same..." Chris responded sobbing a bit. "She doesn't move. She doesn't open her eyes. She doesn't even hold my hand when I hold hers." Millie rested a hand on his shoulder and tapped it to give him some support. The despair in his voice shattered her heart even more.
"She has brain activity, Chris." Millie confirmed once again. "They are trying to understand why she doesn't wake up."
"It's been weeks." He protested, looking at her over his shoulder. "Weeks... I am so tired of doctors saying she has brain activity. Then why is she here like this?" He pointed at Ellie. "She doesn't react to anything! Anything!"
Suddenly, inside her stroller, Heaven opened her eyes. Her pacifier fell off her mouth and she frowned. Seconds after, she opened her arms and started crying.
"Heaven..." Ellie gasped. "My baby girl..."
"She's always so desperate." Millie smiled, looking down at the way Heaven was crying. Chris smiled too.
"Come here, my little cub..." Chris said, picking her up. As he held her under her arms, with his hands supporting her head, the crying stopped and Chris smiled. "Yeah... I know all your vices by now... you wanted this."
"Because her daddy is always holding her on his lap..." Millie told him.
"She's so perfect." He said, holding her up in front of his face. Then, he kissed her forehead and Heaven frowned. "Come see your mommy." He said and got up.
"She looks so peaceful." Millie held back her tears, seeing her daughter like that. "I don't understand. I looked at all her exams. I ran some of these exams twice..." Chris looked at her.
"Trust science... isn't that what you always tell me?" Chris told her but the sarcasm of his voice was bigger than anything else.
"Yeah..." Millie nodded, cleaning her eyes.
Chris bent over Ellie and then lied Heaven down on her chest. Heaven always stayed quiet when he put he near her mother.
"Mommy is as beautiful as you are." He said.
"Heaven..." Ellie whimpered. "I can feel her... I am feeling her..." She repeated surprised.
Then, she felt a hand caressing her hair and she took a hand to the top of her head to see if something was really touching her but nothing was there. Still, she knew that way of touching her. She knew his way of caressing her.
"Chris..." Ellie whimpered, feeling him. "Chris... oh my God..."
"Chris..." Millie called him, resting a hand on his shoulder, and Chris looked back at her. "You have to rest. Go home, I'll stay with her." She said. Immediately, Chris shook his head.
"No..." He responded. "Not yet... I want to stay a bit more." Chris added. "She might wake up. I want to be here if she wakes up."
"The doctor says he doesn't know when that will be." Millie told him. "You need to rest, Chris. You almost don't sleep. You almost don't eat."
"I don't care. I want to be with her." Chris was crying again, looking down at Ellie's face. "I miss the way she looked at me..." He said and Millie gulped trying to control herself. "I miss seeing her eyes... hearing her voice..."
"We all do." She patted his small back. "But she wouldn't want us to be here crying, especially you."
"It's already dark." He said looking out at the window. "Another day gone..."
"At least go and have something to eat." Millie suggested. "Did you have lunch?" She asked and Chris shook his head. "Please, go to the cafeteria and have something to eat. I'll stay here with her and Heaven."
"Ok." He agreed. Then, he bent over Ellie and kissed her on the forehead. "Heaven is sleeping." Chris smiled.
"Hearing her mommy's heartbeat." Millie stated.
"I'll be right back." Chris said.
Millie stayed silent watching Chris leaving the room. Even the way he walked had changed. He walked with his head down all the time now, as if he was afraid of facing the world. Most of his friends had tried to reach him but he isolated himself. Millie thought many times he didn't isolate from them because they were staying in the house with him. He refused to talk, even to his friends. Then, she looked back at her daughter and held her hand.
"Oh, sweetheart." Millie gasped. "We all miss you so much, Ellie." She sniffed. "You have to come back to us. Chris has been so sad, Ellie. He breaks my heart. He spends as much time as he can here. It seems like he doesn't even have a life but he's been a great dad. Ellie. He's been changing her diapers; he feeds her and he spends some time talking to her and singing to her at night when she gives us all hell because she doesn't sleep. You have to meet, Heaven. She looks like Chris. She has the same blue eyes the same lips.. She's beautiful. Your daughter is beautiful. You can't hear me, can you?"
"Yes, Yes I can." Ellie wanted to yell. "No one can hear me..." She gasped.
Suddenly, her heartbeat started to raise and the machine started beeping warningly. Millie went up to it, trying to understand what was happening.
"What's happening?" Chris asked as he reentered the room. "What is happening to her?"
"What are you doing here?" Millie asked him. "You were supposed to go to eat!"
"I left my wallet here!" Chris exclaimed. Then, he saw Millie pressing the button above Ellie's bed and he knew he was calling the doctor.
"You're calling the doctor..." He gasped, feeling his chest becoming heavy. "What's happening, Millie?" Tears blurred his eyes as the machine beeped incessantly.
"It's not as alarming as it seems." Millie explained. "...but it's better to be checked."
"No..." Ellie took deep breaths. "I want to get out of here. I want out!"
Little by little, the machine started beeping at a normal rate and Millie and Chris exchanged a look. That moment, Robert entered the room almost running.
"What happened?" He asked approaching Ellie and looking down at her.
"Her heartbeat increased. The machine went off..." Millie exclaimed.
"What made it go back to normal?" Robert asked, looking at her and Millie shrugged.
"We didn't do anything. It just subsided..." Millie responded.
"Really?" Robert whispered as he started examining Ellie.
"Andy..." Ellie called.
"What the fuck are you still doing here?" Andy asked her, appearing from out of nowhere, even making her jump.
"What happened to me? If I am not dead why can't I be with anyone? Where am I?" Ellie asked nervous and confused.
"You're in a coma, Ellie." Andy responded. "You've been in a coma since your daughter's been born. It's been two weeks. You have to go back to them. You have to wake up!" Andy was almost yelling at her.
"I don't know what to do it. I can hear them talking to me but I can't move. I can hear them. Chris was crying, I don't want him to cry. I want to see my daughter." Ellie yelled.
"You need to fucking open your eyes." Andy ordered. "Open your fucking eyes." Andy ordered again.
Then, he disappeared, leaving her alone. Ellie began to hear Chris again. It was so peaceful to listen to his voice that she stayed quiet with her eyes closed.
"I want to stay a bit longer." Chris said.
"She can't even hear you...." Robert told him.
"Yes, I can hear him!" Ellie whispered. "Stay with me, Chris." She pleaded. "Don't go, babe."
"You should do as Robert is telling you." Millie tried to reason him. "Chris, it was not long ago that you were brought to this hospital."
"What is she talking about?" Ellie raised her head to stay alert. "Why? What happened to him?"
"It was an accident." Chris blurted. "I didn't try anything!"
"You would be dead if it wasn't for Heaven crying." Millie told him. "You need to rest and you know it."
"What?" Ellie frowned. "Dead?"
"Chris..." Robert rested a hand on his shoulder and Chris looked at him. "We don't know when Ellie is going to wake up."
"You should know this!" He muttered. "You keep saying nothing is wrong with her! If nothing was wrong with her she would here, and she's not!" He yelled. "She's not!"
"You should rest." Robert ignored his last remark. "Your mother-in-law is right. You were lucky you were found in time and that she is a doctor so she gave you the first assistance."
"I'm staying a while longer." Chris was adamant.
"As you wish." Robert gave up too and left. After checking all the machines, she was tied to, everything looked normal.
"I am going to take Heaven home." Millie told him, holding back Heaven in her arms. "I think she's better at home."
"Yeah..." Chris nodded. "I'll go later."
"Eat. Please, Chris." Millie begged him, and he nodded.
When they all left the bedroom, Chris sat near Ellie and held back her hand, resting his forehead on the bed. He closed his eyes and just stayed there hearing her heart machine beeping rhythmically.
Ellie frowned at the sudden silence. Nothing could be heard, but she was feeling a presence. She started feeling agitated again and then in a rampant, Andy appeared in front of her once more.
"OPEN YOUR EYES, ELLIE! COME BACK TO THEM!" He yelled at her.
"Stop yelling at me." She begged him, wrapping both her hands around her head. "Stop! I don't know how to come back."
"Open your eyes, Ellie. It's time." Andy said. "It's time to go... come on..."
"I can't." She whimpered and shook her head. "I just can't."
"Yes, you can. Since when you began to say you can't do something. Don't you want to meet your daughter? Don't you want to see Chris again?" He bombed her.
"But I can't. I tried and I can't. Maybe I am really dead." Ellie claimed.
"You say that again and I will kick you for sure." He menaced me. "Open your eyes, Ellie. You can do it!"
"STOP!" She yelled at the top of her lungs.
"Open your fucking eyes!" Andy yelled at the top of her lungs.
"CHRIS!" Ellie closed her eyes and yelled desperately for him.
Suddenly, Chris felt his hand being squeezed. He opened his eyes and his heart began to race when he confirmed that Ellie was squeezing his hand. He looked at her.
"Ellie?" He called her and patted her hair, feeling her gripping onto his hand. "Babe?" He cried. "Babe..."
Her eyes opened wide that moment. She looked so scared. Everything was a bit dark at first but then she began to focus. She saw the ceiling first and recognized it to be a room of a hospital. She was hearing Chris calling her but she began to struggle. When she felt she needed to breathe, she couldn't do it. She was choking on the tube she had stuck in her throat. Ellie began to fight it and wiggling her body on the bed as she couldn't breathe at all. That very second, she became aware of his presence.
"Ellie?" Chris called her. "NURSE!" He yelled. "NURSE!" He yelled twice in a row for he knew she was fighting to breathe.
She couldn't look at him though as she was suffocating. A nurse appeared running inside the bedroom and ripped the tube off her throat quite fast. Ellie took several deep breaths, feeling it was strange to breathe by herself again.
"Ellie?" He called her again as she began to calm down. "My love..." Chris cried.
They stared at one another with just tears running down their faces. She couldn't talk, words didn't come out. She just felt tears rolling down her face. Chris was crying too and he smiled at her. Ellie gave him a tired smile too.
"Don't talk if you can't ok'" He said running his hand over her face.
Then, she noticed how Chris looked so pale and thin. He looked tired as well. She wanted to caress him, but her hands were tied up and there were too many tubes stuck in her still. She could barely move.
"Hi, my love." He said still caressing her face. "I love you and I missed you so much." Ellie tried to speak but she only opened her mouth and no sound came out. "It's ok... don't speak..." Chris told her.
"Hi." Ellie was able to whisper at the second attempt. "Hi, babe..." She whispered again. Chris giggled a bit between sobs and tears and kissed her forehead.
"Hi." He said too. "Welcome back, my sweet girl." He smiled at her, patting her hair.
"My wild boy..." Ellie whispered. She couldn't speak any louder than that.