🔞⚠️ Mature Content, Yeet all the children away. Thanks ⚠️🔞
Lol no. I'm just joking. Sin Free. ✅The_Holy_Priest Approves.
There will be fighting/argument though. I don't know if I need to put up warnings for that. It's not that bad but I'm not sure if it can trigger so uhm yeah 😅
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Changkyun and Jooheon's drive to the younger's apartment was calm and nice. Like everytime, It feels a little awkward at first but Changkyun eventually got use to the other's presence as they talk, getting to know each other more. Jooheon talked about his work and Changkyun openly listened well. The younger never voluntarily talked about himself but he gladly give answers to all of Jooheon's questions. They found out they had slight difference in music taste. While Jooheon likes loud and lively ones, Changkyun surprisingly is into more slow sensual ones. But they found a common ground on a lot of rap tracks and a few artists they both admire.
Changkyun remembered he once dreamt of becoming a rapper and performing on stage back in his foolish middle school and early highschool days, but he eventually got over it and focused more in academics. Everyone believed that was more practical than gambling with slim luck in the music industry. Changkyun believed them, because he knew to himself it was partly true and he can't afford wasting his years over dreams, he needs to be practical not only for himself but to the people that rely on him as well.
He didn't mention any of it to Jooheon though, he deem it's not that important anyway. It was only a silly teenage dream, and it'll be weird to suddenly go and poured his life story out of nowhere. So he just silently listened to the other talk about his favorite artists.
"Thank you again for the ride Hyung" Changkyun thanked the older, after getting out of his car. Peering to the open window to properly talk to Jooheon who's in the driver's seat.
Jooheon smiled widely at him and gave him a nod. "No problem"
"I'll be going now, drive safe"
"Okay, Goodnight"
Changkyun didn't returned his goodnight wish but he did gave him a smile before shuffling away towards the entrance of the apartment complex, where he lives. He turned around before entering to see that Jooheon was still there, as if waiting for him to fully enter before driving away.
Changkyun made a gesture for him to go, but Jooheon shook his head in return, giving him an up-nod as if telling the younger to enter the building first. But Changkyun stayed rooted on his place and just repeated his hand gesture of telling the older that he can go first.
Changkyun can see in his place how Jooheon shook his head to himself, laughing, which put a smile to the younger's face, knowing that Jooheon accepted his defeat. The older gave him a nod waving his hand goodbye, wearing his usual wide dimple smile. He sends Changkyun a playful flying kiss before closing his car window and finally driving away. Changkyun stood in his spot, his hand still half raise from the goodbye wave he sent Jooheon, his eyes following the elder's car until it took a turn and disappeared from his sight.
Changkyun giggled to himself, recalling the little kiss Jooheon had sent him. His smile was wide and his cheeks felt a little warm, it's been awhile since he felt that little tingling sensation in his heart. Jooheon are just too cute sometimes, Changkyun can't ignore it even if he tries.
Changkyun shook his head and finally decided to enter the building, keeping his smile as he got into the the elevators. His apartment floor isn't that high up, just by the 3rd floor so he arrived in no time.
Changkyun halted in front of an old painted black door, familiar apartment numbers staring back at him. He slowly lost his lovely smile. His happy feeling replaced with a downhearted emotion. He always felt slight dread upon going home, knowing what's- who's waiting for him. That's why he's always so dedicated to go to work everyday, despite the want to take his rest at home he would rather go to work. If he could he would work overtime just get away but he can't. He gets upset when Changkyun arrives very late. He's probably upset right now, Changkyun is sure. He looked down at his watch and saw that it's exactly 11:03pm
Hopefully, he's already asleep
He thought, not wanting to face another fight so late in the night. He really just wanna sleep right now. With a sigh, he finally punch in his passcode and entered the apartment. He was met with dim lighting, he breath out in relief, thinking he's already asleep,he doesn't need to deal with another fight.
He turned on the lights by the living room to see better. Removing his glasses and randomly setting it down somewhere, as he tiredly rubbed his eyes.
"Who was that?"
Changkyun flinched hard in shocked by the sudden question. He snapped his head towards the direction it came from to see a man standing near the windows.
" Jae?..why...why are you still awake? It's late" Changkyun says as soft as ever, as if he was scared he'll set off a ticking bomb.
Jae turn to face him, his eyes narrowed, lifting an eyebrow at his words. " Oh really? I wasn't aware it's that late" He says, his voice dripping with sarcasm.
Changkyun bit his lower lip, lightly changing his weight from left to right before he decided to explain himself after finding the right words to say.
" My boss and colleagues invited me to a dinner. I couldn't declin-"
Searching for the right words to say had been no used as Jae didn't even bother to listen to him explain. The other asked him his first question instead.
"Who was that?"
"What do you mean?" Changkyun asked. He was aware Jae was asking about Jooheon, but he really didn't want to talk about the older, specially with him.
" You got out of someone's car, like every other day. It's that Jooheon guy again isn't it?" His voice harsh and loud. He is angry, Changkyun can hear it from his voice and see in on his face.
" yeah " Changkyun answers, he talked about Jooheon before. That time when he saw him drop him off a week ago, and they end up having a big fight about him, which includes a plate being thrown on the other side of the room. Silently, he wonders what other things would end up being broken this time.
" Why are you with him so late? Why does he have to drop you off?" The man questions.
" I told you I had dinner with my boss and colleagues..."
" He is not your co-workers, is he?" Jae cut him off in a challenging question, making his way towards Changkyun to talk to him face to face, Changkyun tried to keep his ground but he couldn't help but taking a step back. He had always been intimidated by the other, no matter how he tried hard not to be.
" He is my boss' friend"
Changkyun answers, trying to lengthen his patience as he reason out with Jae. He can't lose his temper too, Jae already had his tone set high, he needs to try and keep his own low to avoid an argument. Because he knew at the end of it all, it'll be him who will have it bad.
" Then why does he have to drive you home?"
" I have no ride home, and his place is on the way..."
"Every single day?"
Jae asked incredulously, sarcastically laughing at his face. But believing him at all.
"He offers because my place is on the way, and we are friends"
"Excuses! You're just making excuses!!" Jae shouted, walking pass Changkyun and shoving him hard with his shoulders as he did so, making Changkyun lose his balance and fall on the couch that was fortunately there to save him from the fall. He did hit his arm by the wooden drawer beside it though. Changkyun felt the pain pulses in but he ignored it. Quickly, stood up and follow after Jae to the kitchen as the man kept on ranting.
"I was telling the truth! We are just friends, why do you always have to give everything a meaning?" Changkyun says after him, he slightly raise his voice in hopes that it would overlap Jae's own sentences.
" You're giving me reasons to!"
" When did I ever!?" Changkyun asked, his tone sharp and loud as he feels the frustration creep in. He never wanted to shout at him. That's not something Changkyun does. He more likey prefer talking in a much calm way to solve misunderstandings. But it's hard to do that with Jae, he doesn't listen and just jump into conclusions, that aggravates Changkyun.
He had never gave him a reason. Changkyun never hang out with anyone even at University because he knew Jae is a jealous guy and they would fight about it days on end. He doesn't like it fighting with Jae so he would be at school, part-time then home every single day back then. And now that he graduated, he would be home and work then home again, the same cycle every single day. He never gave him any reason to doubt him. Changkyun had always been faithful and he had always been the one to adjust and give in.
" Don't you dare give me that tone!"
Jae shouted at his face, not giving him an answer. He pointed his finger at Changkyun angrily. " Not because you're the one earning money here doesn't mean you have the right to talk to me like that!"
Changkyun sighed harshly, and run his fingers through his hair. This again. They weren't even talking about money, but Jae never fails to bring that up. He knew what Jae feels for being unable to bring money in the house. But Changkyun never cared, he never belittled Jae for that. So he doesn't understand why he always talk as if Changkyun is giving him a hard time over it.
" I wasn't giving you a tone. You are shouting so I did too! In hopes that, that way my words would actually enter your ears and so your brain would actually comprehend what I'm trying to say!"
" Oh so you're calling me dumb now!?" Jae countered, offended.
" I never said that!"
"DON'T FUCKING SHOUT AT ME!" Jae screamed, throwing a glass at Changkyun's direction out of frustration, which missed the latter with only by an inch. Changkyun heard the glass crashed somewhere from behind him but he didn't brother turning to look at it. He was shocked by the sudden action. Though, it wasn't the first time for Jae to throw things around whenever they're fighting, Changkyun just can't get used to it.
" This is why, isn't it? You're sick of me! You're sick of having a stupid jobless boyfriend so you're out there searching for better ones! I'm trying Changkyun! You know I am! I've been searching -"
" Oh my God! I never said anything about you not having a job! I don't care! I can provide for my family and for the both us well enough! I never-" Changkyun cut him off after recovering from the shocked. But the other interrupted him even before he finishes.
" Oh so you're saying I'm adding to your burdens now!?" Jae shouted, clearly he didn't listen well to anything that Changkyun had said. " Is that what I am? Is that Jooheon guy not? That's why you like him better now? Is that why.."
" Are you even listening to me!?" Changkyun shouted at him. He feels 10x tired and frustrated now than when he was at the office dealing with paperworks. Jae isn't listening to him at all. "I'm not cheating on you! I'm not like you!" Changkyun was too frustrated to ever filter his words. He just realized it when the words was already out of his mouth.
There was a paused between them.
Jae looked hurt and offended, which is ironic. If anyone is supposed to look hurt between them, it should be Changkyun. He was the one who got cheated on by Jae before. But even so he knew he have the right to rub it in Jae's face, the the cheater is not Changkyun but him, Changkyun still regretted saying those words. I had been a long time ago, he forgave Jae and he promised the man to never bring it up again. They would never talk about it, but it still resurfaced. Guess Changkyun never really forgot about it, how could he anyway?
"Wow" Jae says, clearly hurt. His voice much lower than his tone awhile ago. " So you still hold a grudge over those times "
"Jae.." Changkyun says his name softly, reaching out to gently hold his hand to show that he didn't mean to brought it up.
Jae harshly pulled his hand away from Changkyun. Not wanting to be held by him.
" I know I did you wrong back then Changkyun. I regretted that, every single day. You know I do, I try to make it up to you. I'm trying! I really am. You have no idea how hard it is Changkyun, to be reminded every single day of how I hurt you back then. You have no idea how hard it is for me that I can't give you the life I promised you back then. How I can't fulfill what I promised to your parents. I promised I'll take care of you, that you'll live an easy life, that you'll have all the luxury in the world. I'm trying Changkyun I'm really fucking trying..."
By this time, Jae already have his tears flowing down his cheeks. It made Changkyun feel so guilty. At the back of his head, he knew he shouldn't. Like Jae had said, he did him wrong, multiple times in different kind of ways. Jae seems to have his knees weaken from all the emotions swirling within him that he lost his balance and stumbled a little, but he managed to get a grip by the kitchen table to steady himself.
Changkyun reached out his hand in reflex to try and catch him but he didn't touch the other when he saw that he managed to keep himself steady. That's when Changkyun noticed what's on their kitchen table, and it made him even more guilty.
There were bowls of rice and other eating utensils nicely laid out on the table, along with two of Changkyun's favourite dishes that he knew had been long cold.
Jae prepared him dinner, he prepared dinner for the both of them to eat together. He waited for Changkyun to get home and eat with him, but there he was having fun with other people. He knew the other is trying, despite the constant fights and unreasonable doubts, Jae always try to take care of him the best he can. As much as Jae can't help him with the bills, the other does things around the house the best he can. He's not perfect but he tries. As much as it's a little dreadful to face him every time he goes home, Changkyun still loves him. He's the only thing Changkyun ever know.
Changkyun was thrown out of his thoughts when Jae walked passed him, he made an action of calling after him but decided not to. He sighed, tired and sad, rubbing his face with his hands. He made his way and search for the glass Jae had thrown earlier and cleaned it up before silently going to their shared bedroom.
He glanced at Jae who was already laying on their bed, the covers over him as he lay on his sides. Changkyun sighs again, removing his tie and changing into more comfortable clothes, not bothering to clean himself first before going to bed, he's too physically and mentally tired for that. He's just going to sleep then take a bath tommorow anyway.
After changing into his pajamas, he silently climbed the bed, glancing at Jae who have his back turned to him. Changkyun reached out to him but he paused, deciding against it. After sighing for the hundred time that night, Changkyun retract his hand and turn to his side, so they were now facing back to back, like how they would usually spend their nights.
Changkyun laid there without moving, his eyes wide-open. His mind racing, unable to fall asleep.
He just laid there, hurt and lonely despite not being alone. Feeling cold despite the thick fluffy blankets over him.
Suddenly, he felt an arm slowly snake on his waist and a breath hit the back of his neck.
"I'm sorry..." He heard Jae whispers in his ear, his voice cracked at the end due to his crying and shouting a few hours ago. Changkyun forced a small smile, despite the man unable to see him. He hold his arm that was drape over his waist and patted it softly in acceptance and assurance the he forgives.
"I'm sorry too" he says. He felt Jae gave him a soft kiss on his neck, indicating that he also accepted the apology. He pulled Changkyun towards him and hugs him tighter, eventually drifting off to sleep.
They're fine again, just like that. Just a simple sorry and everything is okay. But give it another day or two and another war will broke out inside their house.
A memory of Jooheon's wide dimpled smile and the flying kiss he sent him came visiting him again. But unlike awhile ago, it didn't bring a smile to Changkyun's face, it didn't make him happy. Instead, he felt his heart squeeze painfully, it made him feel bitter.
If only....
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Look who updated 😂😂😂
I just finally finished all of my exams (I bullshit through all of them lol) I don't think I would be needing physics, calculus, politics or whatever when I become Mx's sweat wiper so.. 🤷♀️
_
Some of you already predicted Kyun is in a relationship but here it is! We finally got a glimpse of Changkyun's life. I suddenly felt like this isn't a Showki book while writing this chap.
Hope you enjoyed this even if I'd doesn't really focus on Showki. Don't hesitate to share me your thoughts!
-Fireflakes
P.S.
I'll probably do something about Hyungwonho next before going back to Showki.