Happy thirtieth chapter my lovelies! Thank you so much to all the people who have stayed this long. Hearts and kisses 💜💜💜
Cold.
It was finally cold.
After the sweltering, agonizing heat, there was finally blissful cold.
Taehyung's eyelids fluttered open, and he winced softly as a soft light pinched his vision. He felt arms around his body, holding him firmly yet tenderly like a lioness would its cub. When Taehyung turned his head, a sharp spike pierced his skull, and he flinched, noticing a broad chest practically pressed against his forehead.
Though the proximity was so close (and snug), Taehyung didn't feel hot. Rather, the body pressed against him felt like fresh winter air. With a touch of vanilla and smoke.
The brunette shifted a little, recognizing the too-familiar smell, and the body noticed; the arms loosened and a voice thundered quietly, "You little piece of shit."
Taehyung laughed and tears sprang to his wolf-gray eyes.
Oh, how he missed that voice.
"Jungkook," Taehyung chuckled, sniffling as he pressed his cheek into Jungkook's hard chest. With their bodies so close together, Taehyung could feel the other's powerful, prominent muscles through his clothes and the way they seemed to click with Taehyung's lean body like a puzzle.
Jungkook pulled back, and Taehyung looked at his face, trying not to frown at the missing coolness. A stern, cold expression was stitched onto the ravenette's face, and his usual empty eyes almost looked... hurt.
"You're a real asshole, you know that, Kim Taehyung?" Jungkook's blood-red lips were pressed into a thin line.
"You never let me forget, Kook." Taehyung had the audacity to wink.
Jungkook's grip on Taehyung's arm tightened along with the darkness on his milky face. Shadows bruised the skin under his eyes, and the male's ebony locks were a sweaty mess on top of his head. "I'm fucking serious, Tae."
Taehyung dropped his gaze, shame creeping up his insides like the ivy that wraps around trees.
"You tell me you aren't fucking used to being at bars, so I told you I'd fucking sit with you. But you thought it would be a good fucking idea to run off and get lost in a crowd—in a fucking place—you've never even been to before," Jungkook raised his voice.
"And once I finally fucking find you—in bathroom of all places—you're on the fucking floor drunk as shit and sobbing your fucking eyes out," he continued, fury flickering in his irises like a blizzard. "Can you even imagine how fucking scared I was?"
Taehyung glanced back up, his bottom lip quivering slightly. I didn't mean to worry him.
Jungkook sighed, all the anger from his face dissipating, and woe painted his face instead. "Do you know how scary it is to see your... best friend like that? I thought someone had done something or you were hurt. But-but you were just crying, and when-when I walked closer to you, you just mumbled 'Jungkook' and fainted," he muttered, looking deeply into Taehyung's eyes.
"You just fucking fainted. I felt... It felt... like my heart had suddenly dropped, and I-I couldn't breathe. I-I thought you were," he looked away sharply, "dead."
He hesitated before looking back at Taehyung and glaring, "I was so fucking terrified. You little shit—"
Taehyung cut the raven off with a hug. He buried his face into the other's chest, inhaling the musky, luscious aroma. Taehyung's arms were wrapped around Jungkook's waist, and he squeezed his tightly as tears soaked the other's shirt.
"I'm sorry, Kook. I'm so sorry," Taehyung mumbled, trying not to cry.
When did I get so weak? Crying over the smallest things, his mind scolded disapprovingly. The thought just made Taehyung hug Jungkook tighter.
The ravenette sighed deeply and wrapped one arm around Taehyung, using the other hand to lift the brunette's chin up. He stared intently at Taehyung's red-rimmed eyes before saying, "Did you get hurt?"
Taehyung wanted to cry at the gentleness in Jungkook's voice. It was obvious the other wasn't mad at him; he was merely worried.
Jungkook wiped Taehyung's tears with him cold thumbs, his porcelain features softening. "Don't cry, Tae. I'm not mad at you. I was just really worried. Now, tell me what happened. Did you get hurt?" His eyes sharpened like daggers. "Or did someone hurt you?"
"My head, Kook. I got memories back. But it wasn't one. I got... three back, one right after the other. And god, it was so fucking painful," Taehyung muttered.
"What triggered them?"
Taehyung thought, I was sitting with... His eyes widened. Jae-beom! Goodness, I forgot all about him!
"What? It looks like a lightbulb went off in your head," Jungkook asked, his brows furrowed.
Taehyung looked at him with a scared expression. "A lightbulb went off in my head? Kook, that sounds painful."
Jungkook laughed, his famous bunny smile making a quick appearance. "That just means you got an idea or thought of something. A lightbulb didn't really go off."
"Oh, good," Taehyung smiled. "I honestly don't know how they were triggered. I had a drink—"
"By yourself?" Jungkook's voice turned colder.
"Um... with a friend."
Jungkook raised his brow, and his obsidian eyes darkened. "An old friend? You remembered them?"
"No, not an old friend. Once I um... ran away, I sat on a couch and," Taehyung decided it was best not to bring up his encounter with Yugyeom, "this guy came up to me. He was really nice, and he offered to buy me a drink." The brunette lips curled softly as he thought of the playful blonde.
The ravenette's grip on Taehyung's arms tightened visibly. "You just let some random fucking stranger buy you a drink," he practically growled.
Taehyung squirmed, he's kinda got a point. "But he was really friendly. And... he wanted me to say there were better drinks than hot chocolate." The brunette's charcoal eyes gleamed proudly, a grin dancing on his caramel-bronze face. "But I never did."
Jungkook tightened his lips like he was holding back a smile. "Just because someone looks nice doesn't mean they are. What did you drink, anyway?"
"Sex on the Beach."
Jungkook coughed, releasing Taehyung's arm. Taehyung frowned. "You had... Sex on the Beach?"
"No—ew—not literally. The drink, Kook. You know the reddish-yellow one that tastes like summer? It even had this cute little orange slice," Taehyung chirped happily.
"I know that..." his voice faded, but there was a hellish darkness that swept over his face. Taehyung narrowed his eyes.
"Who was the guy?"
"Oh, Jae—"
The studio door was thrown open loudly, and Taehyung jumped at the sound. A gush of air swept inside, tickling the brunette's skin with goosebumps.
"He's a fucking idiot, Hoseok. He never listens to us, anyway. If Tae whoops his ass, maybe it'll get through his thick skull," Yoongi's bitter voice thundered through the studio even though he practically whispered the words.
Taehyung's plump lips curled into a deep frown, why is Yoongi Hyung mad? What happened? He side-eyed Jungkook, who merely rolled his eyes at Yoongi's ill-tempered voice.
There was some shuffling and footsteps. "Don't be mad at him, Hyung. Kook just deals with stuff differently. Look on the bright side, at least he's not back to smo—" Hoseok stopped talking abruptly when he spotted the younger boys sitting up staring at them.
Hoseok's brilliant eyes widened, and the boy dropped the plastic bag in his hand before tackling Taehyung in a hug. His arms wrapped around Taehyung's lean figure, and the brunette almost fell backwards at the sudden contact.
"God Taehyung. You stupid, stupid boy. Do you even know how much you scared us?" he muttered, squeezing the brunette warmly.
Taehyung just buried his face in Hoseok's shoulder, inhaling the other's crisp, summery smell as guilt tore and shred at his insides.
"We were looking everywhere for you, and suddenly Jungkook just cut the call. When we saw him again, he was carrying you, and you weren't moving. I was... so scared, and Kook... he wouldn't say anything," Hoseok's voice softened.
"Hyung tried to get something out of him; he tried to wake you up, but Kook wouldn't let anyone touch you. God, I was so fucking terrified," Hoseok explained.
Taehyung's heart dropped to his stomach, and his lip trembled. He felt so horrible for making them worry, and hearing about how they reacted made his heart pang even more. Taehyung wanted to slap himself for being so selfish.
When Hoseok pulled back, there was so much love and relief in his eyes. "Did someone hurt you, Tae?"
Taehyung shook his head, biting into his bottom lip like one would hold onto the last string of life. He was trying so fucking hard not to let out a sob. I'm not the one who should be crying. I fucked up. I have to apologize first. So selfish, Kim Taehyung, his mind scolded.
"That's... that's good. Are you okay?" Hoseok asked, rubbing circles with his thumbs on Taehyung's arms.
The brunette just nodded; he didn't trust himself enough to answer.
Hoseok leaned into Taehyung's ear and whispered almost sympathetically, "You should probably apologize to Hyung. He's pissed at Kook 'cause he didn't let him touch you, but he's really worried about you. Don't mind his... grumpiness. He barely slept last night, watching Kook as he..." Hosoek paused and pursed him lips.
Oh god, what did Jungkook do? But Taehyung didn't ask the heart-pounding question. Instead he nodded and rose to his feet, wincing at the sting in his head. He almost tripped, but he touched Hoseok's shoulder before walking over to Yoongi.
The blonde's dark eyes were narrowed like knives, and dark circles weighed under them like violet-black crescents. His lips were pressed firmly into a grim line, and his pale skin seemed paler than usual.
Taehyung felt even worse. He dropped his head in shame, staying silent.
"What the fuck do you want?" Yoongi grumbled.
This time Taehyung couldn't stop the tears. He let them roll down as he glanced back at Yoongi, whose stony expression flickered painfully for a second when he saw the tears but hardened just as fast.
"I'm so sorry, Hyung," Taehyung sobbed, hugging Yoongi gently.
"Why are you saying sorry? It's your life; you can do whatever you want," Yoongi said coldly.
Taehyung tightened his grip around the blonde's shoulders. "I wasn't thinking. There was just so much sound, and the smell was horrible. I wanted to sit down, and I was reckless because... because I didn't even tell Kook where I would be," Taehyung cried, his body shaking softly.
Yoongi didn't say anything, and Taehyung thought he had lost the older male, but finally, the blonde wrapped his arms around Taehyung, holding him tightly to keep his body from quivering.
"Scare Jungkook all you want. I don't care. But don't fucking scare me like that again, Taehyung," Yoongi muttered.
Taehyung let out a laugh that sounded like a heavy sob. "I-I won't, Hyung. I promise."
"You better not. I'll lock you up in a box if you ever pull shit like that one more time."
Taehyung laughed, drying his tears on his hyung's warm shoulder.
"What happened, anyway?" Yoongi stroked Taehyung's back.
"I got a rush of memories. So many memories my head felt like it was gonna explode," Taehyung breathed.
Yoongi's peach lips curled into a frown. "The drinks probably fucked with your head. Do you remember anything? About the memories?"
Taehyung furrowed his brows, but only splotches of burning white flashed in his vision. Why can't I remember the memories?
"That's enough snuggles and cuddles, you two. Leave some for the rest of us," Jungkook's deep voice grumbled from behind them.
Taehyung released Yoongi and wiped his eyes. Yoongi glanced at Jungkook with a bright smirk before laying his head on the brunette's shoulder. "Jealous, Kook?"
"What the fuck, Hyung? Not me," his red lips mimicked Yoongi's smug expression, "maybe Hobi Hyung, though."
"What about me?" Hoseok creased his brows, confused, glancing between the two males. One smirking and the other glaring.
Yoongi's glare melted into smirk as he mumbled to Taehyung, "Did he not tell you?"
Tell me? Who? What? "Didn't who tell me what?" Taehyung asked, sniffling. He peered at Jungkook, whose face had suddenly turned rigid as a rock.
"Jungkook, you didn't tell him about punching the walls? Did you at least tell him last time you did it?"
Taehyung's eyes sharpened, and the boy whipped his head to Jungkook, who licked his bottom lip timidly. "You fucking did what?" the brunette growled.
Hoseok scooted in front of Jungkook, trying to protect the raven from the brunette's frostbite-cold glare. "Tae, don't be mad at him."
"I tried to get him to stop," Yoongi added almost dramatically, crossing his arms over his chest, ignoring Hoseok's desperate eyes. "He was at it all night even though they weren't fully healed from the last time he went 'boxing'." He added quotes around the last word.
"The last time? That was so long ago, though," Taehyung asked, confused.
Yoongi widened his eyes, pretending to be shocked. "Oh, he didn't tell you what he did while you were out with Bogum that day Yugyeom came over?" Taehyung's body froze. "He went looking for you, but when he couldn't find you, he went back to... you know." Yoongi wiggled his fingers.
Everything suddenly clicked. That's why Hobi Hyung had asked Jungkook that day if his hands were okay after punching Yugyeom. It wasn't just 'cause of the punch; he bloodied his knuckles before that.
The silver in Taehyung's eyes darkened into a storm, which happened to look unnerving considering they were still blood-red from crying. He walked over to Jungkook, whose face was as blank as an open field, but there was a gleam of rebelliousness glinting in his dark eyes.
Taehyung gritted his teeth when he spotted the dark purple blotching Jungkook's milky hands right at his knuckles. He glanced back at the ravenette's eyes and leaned in closer, their noses almost touching. "Do you think we made rules just for you to fucking break them?" he rasped.
Jungkook opened his mouth to respond, but he let out a a pained grunt instead when Taehyung pinched his arm. The brunette sharply pressed Jungkook's soft, cold skin between his index finger and his thumb, glaring as the other groaned.
"Ah, Taehyung, ow. Let go." Jungkook tried to push him off, but Taehyung just tightened the grip on his skin.
"Kook. Did we make the rules for you to fucking break them?" Taehyung repeated.
"No! No, I'm sorry. Ow, please let go. I won't do it again," Jungkook clenched his jaw, throwing his head back and tossing his curls out of his face. His black eyebrows were creased deeply, his lips squished together.
Taehyung smiled, satisfied, and released the raven's flesh. The usual pale color was a vibrant red, and Jungkook sighed in relief.
"Good. I won't be so nice next time you go hurting yourself," Taehyung said before taking Jungkook's hands into his own, "Now, let's wrap these up, yeah?"
Jungkook's scowl turned into a soft smile as his dark eyes glazed over Taehyung's caring face. The brunette's lips were slightly pouted as his finger brushed over Jungkook's hand. "Look what you did to your pretty hands. That must've hurt so much," he muttered.
"I'm used to it, so it's not bad," Jungkook shrugged.
Taehyung glared at him, his pout still nuzzled on his lips. Jungkook held back a laugh when he realized how much the other looked like an angry baby tiger (not that he was going to tell the other that). "You shouldn't be used to pain, Jungkook. If you want to get hurt that badly, just ask me, I'll gladly punch you."
"But your punches wouldn't hurt, darling," Jungkook teased.
Taehyung smirked, "But my pinches did, didn't they?"
Jungkook stuck his tongue out, and Taehyung laughed.
"Thank god for Taehyung," Yoongi exhaled and sat down between Taehyung and Hoseok. "Or else this asshole would've stayed a wild, savage beast."
"Hyung," Jungkook's smile turned into a menacing glare, "why did you tell him?"
Yoongi took his ebony glasses off, tossing them aside gently before glancing at Jungkook with a tired expression. "You need help, Kook. All three of us do. But you're gonna get it first," he smiled at Taehyung, "Thank god for Taehyung."
Taehyung blushed at the comment, subtly trying to hide his fruit-punch-pink face from the other males.
"I already told you I'm fine, Hyung. I don't need anyone's help," Jungkook said sternly.
"I'm not arguing with you, Kook. You didn't listen to me when I told you to go for therapy—and don't even tell me you didn't need it 'cause both us know that's bullshit. The only thing—well, person—that seems to be helping your fucked-up state is Taehyung," Yoongi muttered almost unimportantly.
But Jungkook's jaw and fist clenched at the older's words. Yoongi continued, "So I don't care if you don't listen to me. But if you don't listen to Tae, you better be ready to have your ass whooped by that fiesty little tiger." He winked at Taehyung.
Taehyung smiled, but he shifted his gaze to Jungkook. The ravenette's expression was something between ice-cold rage and lethargic emptiness. It terrified Taehyung, but his concern for Jungkook was blurred by the storming thoughts, therapy? Why would Jungkook need therapy—
The memory of Jungkook's word hit him like a train wreck."I loved him so much, Tae. He was my everything. And they all killed him."
"They took away my reason for living."
Yugyeom's words slithered in, weaving themselves with Jungkook's voice, "All because of me. I should've died. Not Hoon. He was so precious. Kookie loved him so much."
Taehyung's ash-gray eyes sparked with realization, and his jaw dropped ever so slightly. Things were finally coming together.
This... Hoon guy? He must've been... very dear to Jungkook. But someone—some people, according to Kook—killed him? And somehow Yugyeom is related to all of this. Taehyung's breath hitched, his heart praying he wasn't right, someone actually... killed... Hoon? H-how—
"Taehyung?" Jungkook narrowed his eyes at the brunette's lost state of mind as he placed a big, veiny hand on the other's shoulder. "Did another lightbulb go off or something," the ravnette joked.
But Taehyung didn't smile. He stared deep into Jungkook's black eyes, pushing past the midnight facade.
"Who's Hoon?"