(A/N: request as a pic. fluff. that's it. don't know what else to tell you.)
"Good morning assholes!" Wisp probably shouldn't be so cheery at such an early hour, but really, the temptation of fucking with his roommates was too strong to deny. "I am your morning newscaster and host, the best man only Wisp Exe, and on today's top news we have-"
"Shut the fuck up!" he heard Deo shout, and his grin only widened. He took a long sip of his coffee, before continuing.
"-Time Deo as the main subject! Now, Time Deo was recently spotted actually walking outside, which is quite a shock to everyone who knows-"
Wisp ducked as a pillow was thrown at him, it hitting his coffee up instead and sending the ceramic mug shattering all over the floor, with the remaining liquid slowly leaking out.
"Shut the fuck up," Deo groaned. "You're cleaning that mess up, by the way."
"Hey, I'm not the one who broke it!" Wisp complained, even as he already got started on picking all of the shards up as Deo helped — but only a little bit — by throwing him the wet cloth to clean up the coffee.
"And you're the idiot who thought that buying ceramic mugs in a house like ours was a good idea."
"True," Wisp conceded. "But you're the one who broke it in the first place."
"Yeah, but-"
"Oh don't you start-"
"What time is it?" Bitzel appeared in the kitchen, and both Wisp and Deo jumped, as they never heard him come into the room at all. Bitzel didn't wait for an answer before he immediately started taking out pans and pots, as the other two watched in silent confusion.
"Uh, Bit,l Wisp started, but quickly shy up when Bitzel pointed a knife at him.
"Shut up and don't disturb me," he responded, before getting back to his cooking.
"Why is everyone telling me to shut up," Wisp grumbled.
"Because you deserve it," Deo replied, somehow managing to have grabbed his phone and came back in the span of barely five seconds. He opened it up and started scrolling through, as Wisp sighed and laid his head on the table.
'Oh, how the tables have turned,' he thought.
He raised his head from the table and turned to Deo. "Hey, wanna play chess?"
Without missing a beat, Deo pulled out a chessboard. Wisp had no idea where he had been hiding it, and frankly, he didn't want to know right now.
"I am going to kick your ass," Deo stated flatly, setting up the board. Wisp cracked his knuckles.
"Not if I kick yours first," Wisp grinned dangerously. Deo matched his enthusiasm, and they started playing.
About three and a half rounds later, along with several shouting matches and board-flipping, the kitchen quietened down for the first time in a long time as someone slammed the door open, and footsteps trod down the stairs.
"It's 4 in the morning, why are you preparing breakfast," Luke said flatly, stepping into the kitchen, with Tommy following behind him, sleepily rubbing his eyes and holding Henry the Cow Plushie to his chest.
"It is what?" Bitzel almost dropped his pan. "Wisp, Deo, why the fuck did you not tell me?!"
"Hungry," Wisp shrugged. "Deo broke my coffee, and I needed sustenance."
"It was funny," Deo responded.
Neither of them had known about the fact that Bitzel hadn't known what time it was, but well, as they say, they would reap the benefits of what they'd sown.
Bitzel stared at the two of them, then shifted his gaze towards Tommy and Luke.
"Luke, Tommy, if you manage to get them on the living room couch, I'll give their food to you."
Bitzel turned back to making pancakes, humming as screams and shrieks rang out from behind him. Sometimes, it was nice being the designated chef, if only because it meant he got to avoid the force of Tommy's Patented Puppy Eyes and Luke's ability to get even the strongest men on the floor.