a/n: THIS CHAPTER IS IN A DIFFERENT FORMAT.
FEEL FREE TO SPAM THE COMMENTS: THEY ARE WELCOME!!
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Emery,
I wrote, as promised. Happy?
Sirius.
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Sirius,
Is this what you call writing? This is rubbish. Do you even know what writing is? At least write me a proper letter.
Emery.
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Emery,
This IS writing. I know how to write very well, thanks. No need for you to teach me. This is a proper letter.
Besides, longer letters waste parchment.
What more do you want? Sheesh!
Sirius.
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Sirius,
A letter is supposed to be from the heart. Something like a conversation. It's supposed to be nice and long, with details of what you did, and how you feel. Are you not capable of that?
Really, it isn't difficult. You're just a big meanie who's too lazy to write.
Emery.
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Emery,
Fine. Here's your letter.
I woke up.
I brushed my teeth.
I used the toilet. (Do you STILL want details?)
I ate.
I ate again.
I ate again.
There. Details of what I did. Are you happy now? Look at how much parchment I wasted!
Jeez, you're so particular over what I do. Really, can't I even write a letter in peace? First you force me to write, then when I write, and then you get upset and tell me how to write.
You're so bipolar. And who're you calling meanie?
Sirius.
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Sirius,
You are so mean. That's not a letter.
That's a list, and gross, I don't need those details.
Really, sometimes I wonder why I'm friends with you. All I ask for is a letter. NICELY WRITTEN. Like the way James sends. He writes better than you. Maybe you should learn from him, I'm sure he'll be happy to teach you.
If you don't want to write, then don't.
I don't want to talk to you anymore, since I'm a waste of time, and parchment.
I'll talk to James.
And yes, I called you a meanie. But now I'd like to add that you're a git.
Emery.
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Emery,
You're the one who asked for details, so I gave them to you! And now you say you don't want them?
How much more ungrateful can you get? I'm spending my time here writing this.
YOU WRITE TO JAMES?? THAT'S NOT FAIR! And he didn't tell me. And my handwriting is way better than his, I don't know how you can read his letters. I don't need letter writing lessons, least of all from James.
Why don't you want to talk to me? I'm gorgeous.
I'm better than James, what do you even see in him? He has the brain of a 3 year old.
I'm not a git. Nor am I mean.
What is your problem against me?
Sheesh!
Sirius.
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Sirius,
You know what? Fine! I won't bother writing anymore. I won't even ask.
At least James has a brain, even if it belongs to a 3 year old. You don't.
And your handwriting is awful. You're not gorgeous. You're a prat.
I don't want to talk to you because you think of me as a waste of time and parchment.
So I won't write anymore.
Emery.
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Emery,
Hey, I didn't mean it that way.
Why did you shorten your letters?
My handwriting is great, admit it. And you find me handsome too... Don't lie.
Well it's true that lengthy letters are a waste of parchment... but you don't understand what I mean.
Please, write to me, don't stop.
Sirius.
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Emery,
Why didn't you respond to my last letter?
Helloooo? It's been a whole day. You usually respond the hour right after. Is your owl tired?
Or are you not answering me?
Or did the owl go the wrong way? Maybe the owl fell down halfway..
Or maybe it was hungry..
Or maybe it went on vacation.
I knew your owl was old... Maybe it died.
Emery, please write to me. I miss you.
Sirius.
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Sirius,
Mate, Emery told me to tell you that it's not the owl's problem.
It's yours.
She doesn't want to talk to you.
James.
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Prongs,
Keep your nose out of our business.
Who are you to write to Emery? She compared me to you, for Merlin's sake!
Go write to Evans or something. I'm writing to Emery.
Mind your own business, you nosy git.
Sincerely, Padfoot.
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Padfoot,
This IS my business. Emery told me to tell you to stop writing to her, since you think she's a waste of parchment and time.
Besides, Emery is my friend, I can write to her whenever I please.
Evans is out of the country, so I can't write her.
Sincerely, PRONGS.
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Prongs,
Whatever.
Padfoot.
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Emery,
Please write back.
Sirius.
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Emery,
I know you're reading my letters, please don't ignore me.
Emery, talk to me.
I miss you.
Sirius.
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Padfoot,
Emery says to stop sending her too many letters.
She doesn't want to talk to you.
Sincerely,
Prongs.
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Emery,
Prongs said you don't want to talk to me.
Why? I'm awesome.
It's been 2 days.. Don't you think you're pulling it a bit too long?
Please write back. I miss you.
Sirius.
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Emery,
Please write back. I miss talking to you.
Sirius.
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Padfoot,
Emery says you're a meanie and a git. There is nothing awesome about you.
You hurt her, and she was crying when I flooed over to her house because she invited me over. We ate cookies. They were so tasty.
She still doesn't want to talk to you. She says stop writing to her.
She also says she doesn't miss you one bit.
Prongs.
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Prongs,
YOU WENT TO HER HOUSE??
WITHOUT ME KNOWING?
You guys are mean.
Was she actually crying, or are you lying?
Padfoot.
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Padfoot,
Yes, she invited me over. She was going to call you too, but you were being mean, so she only called me.
And no, I'm not lying. Emery was actually crying. She's sensitive, didn't you know?
You're a terrible friend.
Prongs.
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Prongs,
Oh.
Padfoot.
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Emery,
Please talk to me. It's been 3 days. I miss you.
Sirius.
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Emery,
Helloooo....
Please write back, I'm getting bored.
I'm sorry I made you cry.
I really miss you.
Padfoot.
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Padfoot,
Emery said she's getting sick of you constantly sending her letters.
She'll only write back if you apologize to her.
Prongs.
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Emery,
I'm sorry, for I don't know what.
Sirius.
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Padfoot,
Emery says that's not a proper apology.
Give her a good apology FROM THE HEART and then maybe she'll forgive you.
Prongs.
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Emery,
I'm really, really sorry for saying you were a waste of parchment and time. When you didn't write back, I realized that I miss talking to you.
I, Sirius Orion Black the Third of the Most Noble and Ancient House of Black, number twelve Grimmauld Place, would like to humbly apologize for my actions.
I'm so sorry I hurt you, I didn't mean to. Please forgive me.
I hate when you're angry at me.
You're right. I'm a meanie, and a git as well as a prat.
If you forgive me, I'll be happy.
If not, I understand.
I miss you so much.
Love, Sirius.
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Sirius,
Apology accepted.
It didn't hurt to write that much, huh?
You sent 11 letters without me responding back to you. How much parchment did you waste?
If you'd listened to me and written nicely in the first place, you would've saved so much time, and parchment, as well as energy.
In the future, I'd suggest you listen to me.
Emery.
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Emery,
Thank you.
I know. I'm sorry.
I miss you.
Sirius.
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Sirius,
Come over??
I want to show you something important.
I got a letter yesterday from an unknown address. It's all in code, but I can't solve it. I think it's from Papa. Do you think you could help me decode it?
I miss you too.
Emery.
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Emery,
I'd love to come over.
An unknown address? Maybe it's from your dad.
Sure, I'll help you solve it.
Be there soon.
I miss you more.
Sirius.
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a/n: so i thought i'd write this in letter format. I really, really enjoyed writing it.
Tell me what you think, and do feel free to spam me.
love, elsie.