"Taiga, are you alright?" Aurelia asked beside her, concerned with her sudden change in attitude.
"What? Y-yeah, don't worry. I'm fine." Taiga tried to convince her friend and herself.
Not wanting to pry further and make her uncomfortable, Aurelia didn't ask any further but still kept her worried gaze on the deer-like girl next to her. Instead, she gave her a reassuring side hug to let her know that she was there for support.
Jason observed Taiga's reaction to seeing him keenly, loving his effect on her. He sent a grin full of malice, hatred and revenge but most importantly: promise. He promised to get back what was his - he believed she was his little toy and loathed the Gonzalez family for taking her away.
She belonged to him.
But no matter how persistent he was, Taiga had found a home and made a life - she wouldn't go with him. However, she had to factor in the safety of her brothers whose lives she valued much more than her own.
"Taiga!" A familiar voice called out, Pablo coming towards her.
Afraid that Jason would hurt her brother, she quickly turned back to where she had seen him, only to find the space vacant. The possibility that she had imagined it ran through her busy mind but she wasn't that naive - he had been there and he knew exactly where to find her.
"Hey, cariño." He greeted her with an easy going smile. "You okay?" Her ghostly complexion raising his concerns.
"I'm fine, just a bit under the weather." She tried to play off her anxiety.
He gave her a long look, seeing if there was anything that would give away what she really felt but when he found nothing, he dropped the subject. However, he knew he would ask again later.
"We'll get you home and Miguel can cook you something." He offered. "And these must be your friends?"
Upon the new subject Taiga grinned, eager to show off her new friends.
"This is Aurelia." She pointed to the coffee haired girl. "Reid." The green eyed boy waved. "And Gray." The last quiet one smiled.
"Nice to meet you all, I'm Pablo, Taiga's brother." He introduced himself.
"We've heard a lot about you." Aurelia gushed as if she were talking to a celebrity and in some ways, she was. "Not as much about your other brothers though."
"Diego and Rafael are a recipe for chaos." Pablo and Taiga shared a knowing look. "And speaking of, we should probably get going. They're waiting in the car."
They group said their goodbyes and Pablo guided his sister to where the other two siblings awaited.
"Took you long enough." Diego complained from the front seat, adjacent to Rafael.
"Sorry, just meeting the friends. They've heard of your greatest feats from when you were in school." Pablo reported humorously.
"It was one of the first things they mentioned when I met them." Taiga added.
"Well then, they know that if they mess with you, they mess with us." Diego said.
"How scary." Rafael teased.
Diego glared at him before starting the car and beginning the drive home.
"So, what are their names, when did you meet them and do they think we're the best brothers in the world?" Rafael queried.
"They think I'm lucky to have five brothers, I met them on the first day and their names are Aurelia, Gray and Reid."
"Wait, boys?" Diego growled.
"Focus on the road, perrito. She's allowed to have boys that are friends as long as they're not boyfriends." Rafael spoke. "Sorry, sis' but you're too young for that yet."
"I don't want one yet anyway."
"Good luck with when you do want one. That kid will scare anyone away." Pablo pointed at Diego.
"I ain't no kid - I'm nineteen."
"You act like a five year old." Rafael countered.
"Oh yeah? If I'm a five year old then you're a foetus."
"C'mere you-"
"Boys," Pablo intervened, "can you not fight whilst driving?"
The brothers in the front of the car grumbled whilst Pablo shot an exasperated look towards Taiga making her laugh.
It wasn't long until they fell into a comfortable silence but that just made it easier for Taiga to think. Just as she had begun to feel safe, Jason appeared and burst her bubble of happiness. If she kept it to herself, the same thing that had happened to Diego could happen again but if she told anyone, Jason would automatically see them as a threat and try to harm them.
Once again, it was her or her brothers.
As disheartening as it was, it was one decision she would make over and over again. She only hoped that one day, she wouldn't feel so segregated from them and instead of it being 'her and her brothers' it would just be 'them'.
All of them.
Together.
It didn't take long for them to arrive back home where they all spilled out of the car before racing inside. Miguel greeted Rafael and Diego as they stormed into the kitchen and began raiding the cupboards.
"Nice to see you too, boys." Miguel commented sarcastically at the animals that were now stuffing their faces. "If you go get changed I'll have the dinner ready for when you come back." He offered to Taiga to which she nodded.
As she wandered upstairs, so did her mind. Knowing Jason, he could strike at anytime but she was tired of constantly looking over her shoulder. He wanted to keep her caged like an animal, he wanted her to always be paranoid about his whereabouts, he wanted to consume her.
Surrendering was the last thing she wanted to do but how was she supposed to fight back? If he had escaped even the police's custody, he could definitely come for her brothers.
"Taiga?" A voice broke her out of the trail of never ending possibilities. "Could I speak to you for a second?" Leonardo asked, standing in her doorway.
"Sure."
He observed her like an eagle, making her squirm under his watchful gaze. As he sat down, she couldn't help but find humor in the stark contrast between the 6'3 man on a chair for a twelve year old.
"Pablo mentioned you were feeling unwell?" He hinted for her to explain.
Of course he did. As much as she wanted to be annoyed at Pablo for telling Leo, she couldn't. She could feel her heart warming at the realisation that her brothers truly cared for her.
"It's nothing. I just didn't feel great but I'm alright now."
He gave her a look telling her that he didn't really believe her excuse - nothing could get past Leo. But the eldest brother felt conflicted; on one hand, he wanted to pry further to aid her troubles but on the other hand, he didn't want to make her uncomfortable and pressured.
Leonardo was not an affectionate man but if one knew him enough, they'd understand the little selfless things he did just to keep people he cared about content. Taiga was one of those people.
"You know, you can tell me anything." He started. "I won't force you, but don't think you need to take your troubles upon yourself. We're your brothers for a reason and you're not alone anymore."
"It hurts all of us too see you hurting."
That felt like a slap to the face. For a long time, Taiga had been alone, dealing with her burdens herself after all, who could she rely on? Now that she did, however, she was stuck in her old ways and hadn't noticed that it affected the people around her.
She wanted to get better and build herself again and that meant asking for help when she needed it. But things never seemed so black and white when it involved Jason. He seemed to trigger her and revert her back to how she once was.
"Honestly, it's nothing. I'm good." She smiled at him. "But thanks for being concerned about me."
"We always will, especially when it comes to something about boyfriends?" He questioned.
She laughed in response, knowing it was probably Diego's big mouth who let that on.
"Just friends."
"Hmm... that's what they always say." Humor danced in his eyes.
They both turned their heads when they heard a voice calling for Taiga from downstairs, followed by a series of clatters.
"They'll be grandparents and still whacking each other with their strollers." Taiga joked as her and Leo began walking downstairs.
The corners of his lips tugged upwards, humming in agreement. He could definitely imagine the Diego and Rafael bickering even beyond the grave.
"Before I forget, I filled in your consent form for the class trip." Leo mentioned.
"Class trip?" Rafael asked as the two siblings entered the room and joined the others.
"The school organised for her class to go away for two nights and three days."
"What?" Rafael exclaimed. "What are we meant to do without you here? I've got no partner in crime to bully Diego with." He pouted.
"It'll be a good chance for you to get away from this man infested house and be with your friends." Pablo countered.
"Well, her friends are boys too so it won't be that different." Diego casually mentioned, still clearly wary of her making male acquaintances.
"You're not wrong - Reid and Aurelia fight just like you two." She motioned at Diego and Rafael.
"You should invite them all over sometime." Pablo suggested.
Taiga nodded in reply, grateful that they were accepting enough of her friends despite a few 'boy' talks she knew she would continue to get. However, she could tell her friends were honest and good people - not something that was easy to find these days.
Nevertheless, Jason still plagued her thoughts even though she had so many things to be grateful for: her brothers, her friends, a roof over her head. The torture she endured during her whole child could never leave her unscathed.
It would break anyone.
Yet she was still alive - she often pondered if everything would be easier if she simply didn't exist but at the same time, she now had something to live for. Even so, as soon as something good comes her way, Jason comes to take ten times more.
She didn't need a perfect life, she just wanted one where she could be candidly happy. So badly, she just wanted him completely exiled from her and her brother.
Telling her brothers wasn't an option. It wasn't that she didn't trust them, it was that she didn't trust Jason. She would sacrifice herself any day for her brothers even if she would reap the direst of consequences.
With that decided, she knew her resolve; whenever Jason would decide to show himself, she'd be ready. There was no point panicking over what've could do when he wasn't here - that was exactly what he wanted.
However, thinking so optimistically was difficult and no matter how hard she tried to rid him from her thoughts and such a mental conflict wasn't good for her.
Once she was sitting at the dinner table with a place of food in front of her, she felt drowned by guilt. She should be grateful to even be able to access food so freely yet here she was, dreading having to even eat it.
It wasn't always like this. It seemed to be whenever she was overwhelmed or stressed she'd revert to the old ways and couldn't stomach any food. But if she did that now, her brothers would know something was bothering her and she'd already promised herself that would never happen.
So, in order to not raise suspicions, she forced the food to stay down. It felt horrible - like she was choking but what other choice did she have? Taiga smiled through their family mealtime and even she had to commend her own acting skills.
"I can help clean the dishes." She had offered Miguel but he turned her down, telling her to relax and de-stress from school.
His sister nodded and made her way upstairs, still paler than usual. He was worried - since Leo had basically taken the role of the father of the house since their's was anything but, Miguel had taken on the maternal role.
Although he and Leo have had to act like the parents of the household, first and foremost they were siblings which meant they'd look out for one another. Each of the brothers had a strong sense of loyalty and fierce protectiveness but especially over their sister.
If she was hurt again, they would tear the world apart.
Taiga was lying on her bed, her mind rifling through the torrent of thoughts that made its home in her head. All the 'what ifs' and 'maybes' were driving her insane and she just wanted it to stop.
Before she could think any further, a strong urge to gag hit her. She clumsily scrambled off the bed and to straight towards the toilet, knocking down a few things in the process.
Ungainly, she spilled the contents of what was a delicious dinner down the toilet for what felt like far too long. Her throat burned and her eyes watered but just as another wave of nausea hit, a pair of hands held her hair out of the way and rubbed soothing circles on her back.
Once she had finished her business, the same hands passed her a tissue to wipe her mouth with before she slumped against the wall in defeat.
"I'm fine, really." She told Diego with a raspy voice.
"You're not and you're also not convincing me or you by saying it." He raised an eyebrow.
"It's just stress." She stated.
"You're not...?" Diego started before narrowing his eyes questioningly.
"Not what?"
"...Pregnant?"
"What?" She wheezed out, her laughter sounding crackly. "Of course not."
Diego felt a sense of accomplishment at being able to make her forget about whatever was troubling her, even if it was just for a moment. He passed her a glass of water she didn't notice him prepare and finished the cup in a few, short gulps.
She muttered a quick thanks before letting out a long sigh. Crumpled against the wall with a gaunt and unhealthy looking pallor only increased Diego's concerns but he was helpless.
As much as he wanted to, he couldn't force her to tell him what was wrong but he couldn't help but think about the last time.
He had a scar so he'd never forget.
Never could he blame her however, he wished he could've done something, noticed something, known something. He knew how it felt to have the pressure of knowing something so important but not being able to tell it, but he had changed.
He was now more straight forward and said exactly what he thought. He didn't expect Taiga to become like that overnight, but he wanted her to speak her mind at least once.
"I'm sorry you had to see that."
"Don't even try to apologise for that - it's completely natural. It'd be like me feeling bad for blinking." He deadpanned.
His sister smiled. Not one of gratefulness or glee, no. It was a smile of fatigue. She looked tired. Tired of everything.
And so he hugged her.
He wouldn't ask if she was okay because it was clear she wasn't however, some people just needed a hug. They didn't need encouraging words or special gifts to cheer them up, they just needed some physical reassurance.
Taiga could not be more thankful. She didn't want someone to tell her everything would be fine or that she's the strongest person they know. As nice of a thing it is to say, she never really believed it and it only emphasised that fact that she wasn't what she could be.
It was exactly what she needed and she didn't know if she'd get one again after dealing with Jason.
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Hi all!
Update for those who wanted one 😊 as always please point out any mistakes because I'm terrible at planning and proof reading.
Has anyone ever watched Mirai Nikki before? If so, any other favorite anime?
For any ARMY out there, what'd you think of the Fix You cover because it brought my soul to heaven.
I hope you're all doing well and staying happy, my messages are always open if you want to talk.
-Chisaki
Instagram: @hiranochisaki