Y/N's POV
Why... why did I have to deal with this. One ear I'm listening to Thor repeatedly talking about the low setting sun, while I'm the other I'm listening to Bruce freaking out over being on another planet. What fucking lord above did I anger for them to curse me like this.
"Sun's going down. Sun's getting real low." Thor continued to repeat to Banner, pausing in the small doorway of a building. I exhaled through my nose, pacing around as I had to stop myself from slapping Thor.
"Thor, do me a favour?" I called to him, making his head turn towards me.
"Yes? What is it?" He questioned, allowing Bruce some time to hear his own thoughts.
"It's just a tiny little favour, y'know. Yeah, I was wondering if you could SHUT THE FUCK UP?!" I said way louder than I meant. It was enough to make both Thor and Bruce jump, and enough to make Thor raise his hands in surrender.
"Bruce, I know you're confused about the whole situation. This is probably very overwhelming, but if we're going against this 'Goddess of Death', we need your help. Now, I myself couldn't care less about who this woman is. I don't want to go fight her, but I'm going to because I need go to Asgard and I then need to get back to Earth. Now, would you do us all a favour, shut up complaining, get your ass undercover, and let's keep moving." I stared Bruce down, not caring whether he accepted my words or not. I want to get this all over with so I can get home.
Bruce slowly nodded to me. The nod hastened as he seemed to get his spirit back, and I smiled at him.
"Yeah. Yeah, I got it. Let's do this and get back to Earth." Bruce agreed with me, and we started moving again. Though, that was probably a bad idea. We walked out to the street, seeing the colour green everywhere. Music was booming from speakers around us. Men and women were dancing around with images and banners of Hulk.
I turned back to Bruce and Thor, seeing the two had just disappeared into the crowd. Oh, fucking brilliant. Now for a game of Where's Wally.
I started to make my way through the crowd. It was a little annoying that there was green smoke practically everywhere, but I handled it like a champ and kept scooting through people.
"Thor? Bruce?" I called out, earning no response. I moved down a flight of stairs that was absolutely full of people with Hulk faces on sticks and all sorts of things.
I could very faintly see Bruce in the distance. I assumed Thor was nearby, too. I started pushing through people a little quicker, making my way over to Bruce rather fast. Lucky for him, he'd bumped into so shark looking alien, and they looked none too pleased.
Thor appeared next to me after getting past the crowd. He stood in front of Banner, preparing to hit the alien before something hit it first. The thing suddenly went down to the ground as an obedience disc hit its neck, shocking it. After falling, Valkyrie was revealed to be stood behind the creature, hands on her hips as she stared at Thor.
"Hi." Thor said awkwardly, then looked at me. I raised a hand and gave a small wave, but other than that I had no vocals leaving my mouth. Valkyrie returned the awkward greeting but kept her stance.
"I was... I was gonna do that." I spoke up. Obviously I wasn't going to do the whole obedience disc thing, but I was certainly going to beat the guy's ass.
"Yeah, well, I did it first." Valkyrie looked to me, then glanced at Bruce who was still behind Thor.
"What're you doing here?" Thor asked, stepping in front of Bruce to hide him.
"What are you doing here? I thought you guys were leaving." Valk asked the same question.
"It's easier said than done." I swept my hair to the side after a stray lock started to drape forward. Valk shrugged in agreement. She looked at the towel over Thor's head with a confused expression, then at me who had absolutely no disguise at all.
"Why do you have..." She pointed at the towel on his head.
"It's a disguise." Thor answered, making you narrow your eyes.
"We can still see your face." Both me and Valk said in unison. Honestly, the stupidity I was hearing. Thor then proceeded to pull part of the towel across his mouth and nose.
"Not when I do this." He said, looking at me. I unintentionally allowed my arm to fly out and punch him in the shoulder. The sheer idiocy I was hearing was the reason for my muscle spasm.
"Hey." Thor whined, placing his other hand on his shoulder. Valk sighed and started to walk in the other direction. I thought she was just going to leave until she paused and motioned for us to come, too.
The three of us entered some apartment complex, walking down the hall to a window and stopping there was a door to the side, and I assumed that's where we were going.
"Look, I've spent years in a haze, trying to forget my past. Sakaar seemed like the best place to drink and forget, and to die one day." Valkyrie explained why she was here.
"Then you're a dumbass. This place is horrible." I laughed aloud... nobody else did. I coughed into my hand, straightening myself.
"So, you're joining the team?" I asked her, eliciting a nod.
"Is there a name for it?" She questioned. I turned to Thor for the answer, and he had the same look on his face. The same look that meant he was about to say something stupid.
"Yeah, it's called the Revengers." Thor said with very clear inspiration from the Avengers.
"Revengers?" Valk said the name in confusion.
"Well, we're all getting revenge. I'm getting revenge. You're getting revenge. Wh-what about- are you guys getting revenge?" Thor looked between you and Bruce.
"I'm undecided." Bruce stammered out.
"If I was getting revenge on someone, it'd be a cruel death for them. But, no. I'm not getting revenge." I crossed my arms, still finding the name to be one of the worst things I'd ever heard.
"Oh, that's too bad. 3 to 1. We're the Revengers. Meeting over." Thor declared, and Valkyrie rolled her eyes before opening the door. I slipped to the doorframe, peering inside to see a raven haired man who was chained up.
"Surprise." Loki said unenthusiastically. As soon as we all entered the room, Thor went straight for an item to throw at Loki. Once he had grabbed and thrown said item, it ricocheted off of Loki's skull and bounced across the floor. A nice move, I will admit. A very nice move. "Ow."
"Had to be sure." Thor muttered, following Valkyrie.
"Hello, (Y/N)." Loki greeted me. The roles seemed to be severely reversed this time. Instead of me and Thor being the ones in captivity, it was Loki in binds.
"What's up, antlers. How've you been?" I walked past him, looking around the room.
"I've been wonderful. Just wonderful." Loki confessed, yet I couldn't tell if it was sarcasm or not. For all I know, the guy might be into bindings. I'm not one to judge.
"Sakaar and Asgard are about as far apart as any two known systems. Our best bet is a wormhole just outside of city limits. We refuel on Xandar, and we can be back in Asgard in... 18 months?" Even she didn't sound like she knew the amount of time it'd take. This was like having a blind tour guide during the safari.
"Nope. We're going through the big one, there." Thor pointed at the giant red wormhole in the sky. Haha... what?
"The Devil's Anus?" Valkyrie said questioningly. Okay, what the hell was wrong with these people and their names for things.
"What is wrong with your names for these things?" I cringed as I thought the name over in my mind. At least give it a name that would strike fear into the hearts of people.
"Woah, woah, what? No, we can't go through that thing. That looks like a collapsing neutron star inside of an Einstein-Rosen Bridge." Bruce's words flew over my head like a plane over land. And to think that I called myself the Cosmo Wolf, yet didn't understand something that was definitely to do with space.
"(Y/N), can't you just teleport us to Asgard? You can do that, right?" Bruce looked at me in curiosity. Wasn't something I was even going to try.
"No, I can't do that. I can't teleport or open portals that far. The only reason I even ended up here is because of how much excess energy I had in my body." I shut down the idea. Sure, I could probably make some distance with it. I could probably get us many planets away from here, but after what I'd been told, I wasn't expecting I was gonna get as far as Asgard.
"Well, if you can't, then the Anus is our only option." Thor stated, and I grumbled aloud.
"Would you stop saying that." I croaked in a pained voice. Why can't they just call it something normal?
"Well, we're gonna need another ship if you guys want to go that way. Mine will get torn to shreds." Valk pointed at the wormhole with a bottle in hand. Does that woman ever stop drinking?
"Can we get one that preferably has music?" I asked in a childish tone.
"As long as it has a cup holder for drinks, I'm fine with that." Valkyrie raised her bottle to me, proceeding to down it. "If we're gonna die, I'm bring alcohol!" She said happily, turning to go grab more.
"So, what'd guys say? Uncharted metagalactic travel through a volatile cosmic gateway. Talk about an adventure." Thor said with a small smile. The three of us: Thor, me, and Banner, bumped fists.
"Where are we gonna find a ship?" Thor asked as he walked back to Valk. He enjoyed his cardio with the amount he was walking between us.
"There are one or two ships. Absolute top of the line models-" Valkyrie started before being interrupted.
"I don't mean to impose-" Loki interjected, earning a bottle tossed at him by Valk. But, before it hit him, I caught it in my left hand.
"Hey, don't hurt my man." I pointed the bottle at her, clearly surprising the three. I turned to Loki, seeing him also confused.
"Well, thank you-" Loki began again, but I shattered the bottle over his head, surprisingly leaving no visible damage. "Ow." He said after a small pause.
"Just wanted to do that myself. Don't mind me." I backed up to the others again.
"The Grandmaster has a great many ships. I may have even stolen the access codes to his security system." Loki explained, and I couldn't help but scoff.
"And you've decided that now is a good time to do the right thing?" I tilted my head.
"Heavens, no. I've run out of favour with the Grandmaster, and in exchange for codes and access to a ship, I'm asking for safe passage through the Anus." Loki spilt his motives. Doing whatever it takes to save himself. That's the Loki I remember.
"So, you're saying you can get us access to the garage without alerting anyone?" Thor asked curiously.
"Indeed, brother. I can." Loki confirmed. You motioned for the other three to come closer.
"Huddle. Let's converse about how your brother is talking shit." I said to Thor as we got into a small circle.
"Hasn't this guy has tried to kill all of us at some point? Why should we trust him?" I questioned the team.
"We shouldn't." Valkyrie conceded. This felt like it was going to end badly. Once a snake, always a snake.
"But he's our best option for escaping this place." Thor made a valid point. The other three of us hummed in agreement, knowing that it was true.
"If we're boosting a ship, we're gonna need to draw some guards away from the palace." Valk informed.
"Why not set the beast loose?" Loki asked, telling us he could very easily hear what we were talking about.
"Loki, I've beaten your ass before. Don't make me do it again." I reminded him of back in New York, which succeeded in making him shut up. Clearly he didn't want none of this.
"You guys have a beast?" Valk asked in an amused voice. She looked between the three of us, before dropping on Bruce.
"No, there's no beast. He's just being stupid." Thor shifted her attention away from Banner. "We're going to start a revolution." He said enthusiastically.
"Oh, hell yeah. Can we bring Korg with us to Asgard?" I remembered the 'Kronan' and his unintentional comedy. The guy could make hard cash if he became a comedian.
"Perhaps." Thor shrugged in response.
"Who's your friend, again?" Valkyrie looked over at Bruce. I swear, I seem to have forgotten how innocent Bruce is when he's not Hulk.
"Doesn't matter. Let's move." Thor ordered.
Well, guess it was time to go beat up some people.