His eyes widened in surprise, and he opened his mouth to speak, but I didn't give him a chance.
"I've thought this through, Carter, and I think this is what's best for me. Nothing is keeping me here anymore; I lost my job, my company, and got attacked twice in the span of a fucking week, not to mention the shit that went down tonight."
"You'll crush him," Carter muttered, pain evident in his voice.
"I need to do this," I whispered, feeling tears forming in my eyes. "Things are fine between him and me now, but what happens when he's ready to move on? You saw what happened tonight; there will always be Bianca's in his life ready to make a move on him no matter what it takes, and I'd rather not be here when he's ready to leave me for one of them."
"Stazi," Carter shook his head in disbelief. "You don't know him like I do; he's changed drastically ever since you stepped foot in his office. It's only been you since then."
I shook my head, not wanting to hear it. "I want to believe that, but he's too unpredictable, reckless; one minute he's giving me the world, then the next, he's shutting me out and acting like I don't exist. I just don't want to stay here clinging on to the hopes that he's a changed man after I've already lost everything."
I swallowed the lump in my throat and wiped the tears falling down my face with the back of my hand. I rehearsed this speech in my head so many times before he came over but saying it out loud made it real than ever.
"Nathaniel isn't the relationship type," I continued. "It's no secret, so either way, this would be inevitable. I've made my decision Carter, I just wanted to tell you so it wouldn't come as a surprise when it's time for me to go."
"Shit," he muttered to himself, dragging a hand down his face. "Do you plan on telling him?"
I shook my head again. I didn't want him to know even though I knew it was wrong; I needed to leave him behind before he left me.
"When do you plan on leaving?"
"Two weeks," I mumbled guiltily.
I already hired a moving company; they were just waiting for me to say the word.
Carter sighed heavily and raked a hand through his brown locs. "Stella?"
I shook my head. I didn't tell her on purpose because I knew the moment I did, she'd run her mouth off to Nathaniel, and I needed this to be kept a secret for as long as possible.
"I'm going to be honest with you, Stazi; I don't like this at all, I think Nate deserves to know, but if you're absolutely sure, I'll support your decision either way."
"Thank you, Carter," I sighed, resting my hand on top of his.
He didn't say anything as he stood up and wrapped his arms around my body, giving me a comforting hug. "I'll miss you."
"I'll miss you too," I sniffled into his chest, feeling my heart break already.
Eventually, I let him go knowing he needed to get back to Gabrielle, and even though I knew this wasn't going to be the last time I saw him, saying goodbye hurt more than I expected.
I didn't hear from Nathaniel for the rest of the week, which I found surprising. I know I told him I wanted space, but I didn't think he'd actually give it to me. He had a reputation of ignoring everything I said and doing his own thing, but I guess he was done going against my word.
It was Sunday now, which meant I was moving in exactly a week. The moving company was scheduled to arrive in an hour, but I still couldn't find the energy to get out of bed. My eyelids were heavy from the lack of sleep I got, and I'd be lying if I said it wasn't because of Nathaniel.
I'd gotten so used to sleeping in his arms, inhaling his spicy scent while he rubbed small circles on my back it seemed impossible to sleep without him now. I missed feeling the vibrations of his voice against my ear as I laid on his chest the nights he would take work to bed with him.
I brushed my fingers against my lips, imagining his on top of mine, devouring me as if I was his favorite dessert.
I wanted to lie there and continue living in my imagination for as long as possible, but the greasy smell of bacon wafted into my nostrils, snapping me out of my trance.
I knew exactly who it was before I entered the kitchen, but I was still shocked when I saw him standing there in front of the stove with his back turned to me. He wore a tight-fitted white t-shirt with grey sweatpants instead of one of his expensive suits, and I could tell from the way his hair flowed freely that he didn't bother doing it today as if he planned on being here.
My eyes hungrily roamed his dark tatted arms threatening to rip out of the shirt he wore, and I could my core throbbing with excitement just at the sight of him.
"Hungry?" His throaty voice sliced through my thoughts, and I looked up to find him boring his crystal eyes into mine as he held a plate full of food in his hand.
"Hmm?" I tilted my head to the side, trying to remember what he asked, but I couldn't stop staring at my pink apron tied around his body.
"Anastazi."
"What?"
"Are you hungry?"
I took a seat on the other side of the marble counter and looked up at the beautiful man in front of me. Dark bags hung low under his eyes as if he hadn't gotten a wink of sleep in the past few days, something I could relate to.
"Why are you here?" I whispered, feeling my stomach flip as he moved closer and placed the plate of food in front of me.
"To apologize."
"You have my number."
"I wanted to see you," Nathaniel murmured as he handed me a fork before pulling up and chair and taking a seat on the opposite side of the counter.
I knew he wanted to be close to me, but if he sat beside me, that meant he wouldn't be able to see my face because he knew I'd keep my head down and avoid him while I ate. He was always 10 steps ahead of me, something I always admired about him, but other times it could be annoying like now.
"I told you I needed space Nathaniel," I aggressively stabbed the waffle drenched in syrup and shoved a piece into my mouth. It took everything in me not to moan as the delicious taste spread through my mouth like a wildfire. It never ceased to amaze me how great a cook he is, something he definitely picked up from Nonna.
"It's been a week."
"You need to leave," I mumbled, suddenly remembering that the moving company was scheduled to arrive any minute now.
"I haven't even apologized yet," Nathaniel reminded me as a smirk stretched across his face.
I sighed and looked down to check the time on my phone, trying not to rush him and spark any alarms. He's gotten too good at reading my facial expressions, so I needed to stay calm.
"It wasn't your fault, so there's nothing to apologize for," I assured him, forcing a smile on my face. "Sorry, you came here for nothing but feel free to leave now."
Nathaniel's eyes narrowed as he watched me check the time on my phone again, immediately putting two and two together that something was up.
"Are you expecting someone?"
I sucked in a deep breath and casually shook my head, trying not to give anything away. "No, why?"
Nathaniel leaned forward and placed his large hand over my phone to prevent me from rechecking the time again. "Because you haven't stopped looking at your phone since you sat down."
I tucked a strand of hair behind my ear and rolled my eyes, being sure to keep my composure.
"Well, if you must know, I made plans with Stella to go shopping today for wedding things which is why I need you to go so I can get ready," I lied easily in hopes he would take the bait and leave before the moving company arrived.
He chuckled darkly and shook his head in disbelief. "So it is true."
"What?" I squinted at him in confusion, not entirely understanding what he meant.
Nathaniel sighed heavily and ran his fingers through his hair in frustration. "I know, Anastazi," he murmured quietly, peering up at me through his thick lashes, pain evident in his voice.
Nausea flooded my body the second I understood his words, but I refused to believe Carter would give me up that easily.
"Know what?" I decided to feign ignorance, hoping that the conversation would take a turn in another direction.
Nathaniel's jaw clenched, and out of the corner of my eye, I saw his fists trembling against the countertop in pure anger, but he quickly stuffed his hands in his pocket before I noticed.
"That you're moving in a week and expecting guests to arrive any minute now to begin packing up your belongings which is why you've been rushing me to leave and why you haven't stopped checking the time." He didn't bother beating around the bush, but then again, that was never his forte.
The color immediately drained from my face, and it felt as if someone stuffed a million cotton balls into my mouth. I sat there, frozen, not knowing what to say or do because everything he had just uttered was true.
Carter was the last person I expected to betray my trust, but the fact that Nathaniel was in front of me right now with all the knowledge of my plans was a clear indication that Carter valued his relationship with Nathaniel more than his relationship with me.
I should've known something like this would've happened, but I wanted to believe that Carter would keep my secret as I asked.
"Don't be angry with Carter," Nathaniel mumbled, reading my thoughts. "He never would've told me if I didn't threaten to bankrupt him."
"You're unbelievable," I managed to choke out, already feeling sick to my stomach that I lost trust in Carter that easily.
Nathaniel chuckled bitterly and pinched the bridge of his nose before gazing up into my soul. "But what I don't understand is why and why you never planned on telling me."
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