Sixteen years old Alex Smith was seated under the biggest tree behind the gym at her high school. It was her favourite spot. Even under the hottest sun, the tree keeps the ground cool and shaded.
She was reading To Kill a Mockingbird by Harper Lee that fine afternoon. When she reads, Alex gets pulled into the story. She was so immersed in the book that she didn't hear the group of boys coming up to her, until one of them spoke.
"Hey."
Alex looked up abruptly. She wasn't expecting to be interrupted. Nobody usually comes back there. She was more surprised when she realised who it was.
It was Colin, one of the popular boys from her class. He was a jock, with blonde hair and blue eyes. He played football and lacrosse. He was the ultimate American boy. So why was he speaking to her?
She glanced behind him. His three posse were huddled together, watching them and laughing. She sighed and looked up at him. "What do you want, Colin?"
"What are you reading?" he asked, flashing her a toothy grin.
"Why do you care?" she asked flatly.
Colin chuckled nervously. "Okay... I can see that I'm disturbing your peace. So, I'm just going to say it." He took a deep breath and asked, "Will you go to the Junior Prom with me?"
Alex looked at him and sighed deeply, before she got up to her feet. She collected her things and swung her old, raggedy bag over her shoulder. She looked at him squarely in the face and said, "Go ask someone who cares."
Then she turned around and walked away. She could hear the other boys laughing.
Alex thought that was the end of it, but at the end of class, Colin approached her again at her locker.
"Can I talk to you?" he asked.
Alex noticed his posse was not around. She slammed her locker shut and walked away. "I have nothing to say to you."
"Alex, wait," Colin said, blocking her path. "I was serious before. I want to go to prom with you."
"Leave me alone," Alex hissed at him and walked around him.
He followed her out the main doors. "Alex, could you please hear me out, just two minutes." When Alex kept walking, he pleaded, "Please..."
To his surprise, Alex slowed down and glared at him. "120 seconds."
"Okay! Cool, um," Colin paused for a few seconds. He thought he knew what to say but at that moment, his mind went blank.
"90 seconds."
Colin shut his eyes and raked his brain. Then he opened them again and spoke quickly, "I think you're great. You're smart, you're always at some corners reading and not caring what's happening around you. You're different, in a good way. I think you're someone worth knowing. So, will you go to prom with me?"
Colin looked at Alex hopefully, his blue eyes shining with anticipation.
Alex took a deep breath and exhaled. Then she said, "Your two minutes is up." Then she walked away.
Alex tried to keep her cool, but she couldn't stop thinking about the things that Colin said as she walked home. As much as she wanted to believe him, she knew this could end up like Carrie. Unlike Carrie, she doesn't have telekinetic powers. But somewhere within her, there was a glimmer of hope.
Maybe Colin really is a nice guy? Maybe he truly wants to go to prom with me?
Alex sighed and shook herself back to reality. Life has been hard for her for as long as she could remember. She was born into poverty. Her father, the sole provider for her family, passed away when she was two years old. Her mother struggled to make ends meet and ended up mixing around with troubled men. By the time Alex was six, her mother had become a victim of substance abuse.
Alex had always felt separated from others. One of the reasons was the way she looked. Her father was Black-Caucasian mix and her mother was Korean-Caucasian mix. Alex has blue almond-shaped eyes, straight nose, pouty lips, black straight hair, olive skin, and long limbs. She was quiet and barely have any friends growing up.
The house she lived in has seen better days. Her mother was never good at housekeep and ended up leaving everything broken unamended. There were days when Alex would go to bed hungry because her mother forgot to feed her or she was too strung out. When she was younger, her mother would walk her to and from elementary school. But there were days when Alex was left waiting at school and her mother didn't show up. After waiting for a couple of hours, she would walk home on her own, and usually would find her mother passed out on the couch surrounded by beer bottles.
Sometimes she's not alone. Alex had lost count of the numbers of different men her mother brought home. Most of them ignored her, pretended like she doesn't exist. But there were some who liked to push her around, liked telling her to grab them a beer from the fridge or to 'get the hell out of my sight'. Whenever her mother brought home these men, Alex would lock herself in her room.
The only good memory Alex had was during her tenth birthday. She came home from school and her mother was waiting for her in the kitchen, with a whoopee pie on a plate and a single candle lit. She was so happy that her mother remembered her birthday. They sang happy birthday and blew the candle out. Then they shared the small cake together.
As a teenager, things became harder for her. She was the weird girl at school who wore faded bad-fitting charity clothes and has no friends. She spent her breaks outdoor, behind the gym where nobody ever goes. She would read, books that she got from the library. She loved to read. Reading brings her into worlds that she would never be able to go in real life.
So when Colin asked her to prom, who can blame her for hoping?
Alex found herself imagining what it would be like to go to prom with Colin. He would be looking smart in a black suit and blue tie that brings out the colour of his eyes. He would smile when he sees her in her dress.
What dress? The voice of reason poked its ugly head.
She couldn't afford a prom dress, not even the ones in the thrift store. Colin would never be seen with a girl wearing a dress from a thrift store.
Alex scoffed. Served you right for dreaming. She shook her head to get rid of the thoughts in her head.
She has reached home. She unlocked the door and went inside.
The first thing she noticed was the strong smell of vomit mixed with alcohol. It was stronger than usual because all the windows were closed. Alex coughed and went into the kitchen. She opened the window to let out the smell and let some fresh air in. Then she went to the dark living room. As she pulled back the curtains and opened the windows, she wondered where her mother was. Usually her mother would open the windows and curtains in the morning.
Alex turned around and groaned. The living room was a mess! There were bottles everywhere. She started picking up the bottles closest to her. Then she noticed it, the pair of legs from behind the coffee table. Mom passed out again.
Alex exhaled and went to her mother. She was lying face down on the carpet, her hair covering her face. Alex knelt down beside her and tried to shake her awake, but she realised something was wrong. Her mother felt cold to the touch.
"Mom? Mom!"
She tried shaking her, but there was no response. So Alex grabbed her arm and turned her over on her back. When she saw her mother's face, she screamed!
Her mother was pale and lifeless. There were vomit crust on the corner of her mouth, nose and cheek.
Alex leaped back and started crying. This can't be happening. No, no, no, no, no...
She didn't know how long she remained frozen on the spot. Finally, she got up and went to the kitchen. She picked up the wall phone with shaky fingers and dialled 911.
She couldn't remember what she said to them, but when the police and ambulance arrived, she was still standing in the kitchen, staring blankly at the wall.
Everything around her happened in a blur. They were moving fast and slow at the same time. The police tried to talk to her but she couldn't hear what they said. She was in shock.
She watched them taking her lifeless mother away in a black bodybag. She felt hot tears flow down her cheeks. That was the last thing that she felt.
Everyday after that day seemed blurred together. She remembered having to spent nights at the local CPS, because she was still a minor. She remembered attending a very drab funeral for her mother.
When she thought that things couldn't get worse, she was told that she will be going to Waco, Texas. Her mother's elder sister, the aunt that she has never met, has agreed to take custody of her.
That was the first time that Alex had considered running away. But she changed her mind and let the CPS worker take her to Texas, knowing full well that she will be miserable there.