phosphenes (n.) zoro x sanji [roommates au]

chapter 23 - caeles

> slow dancing in the dark  - joji

" you are a minute of quiet
in a loud shouting world. "

- gabriel gadfly

[ zoro ]

MAYBE IT WAS something innate, an unspoken desire, or an unseen connection of some sort—that kept leading them to the ocean. As if a red string of fate had hooked itself to their belly-buttons and tugged them towards the briny sea.

The tanned boy stared into the crashing and retreating of the jet-black waves, his green hair shimmering as the breeze ran its fingers through them.

They both felt silence seep between them comfortably—Sanji was his safe space.

Zoro spoke like thunder rumbling.
"You know the letters I always throw?"

Sanji nodded.

"They're from my family in Osaka."

"I left them because my dad was against me learning art. I was angry, so I cut off all contact with them and came here."

"My sister has been sending me regular letters, most of them berating me, some of them asking me to go back, and the most recent one said my mum got cancer."

Zoro laughed gently to himself, but it became more erratic with every breath. All parts of him slowly shed away, his disbelief, denial, everything—except for his grief. It transformed to something raw and racked him from inside-out with sobs.

"If only I could turn back time," He mumbled beneath his tears, his hands trembling as he grabbed the metal barricade. "I refused to read her earlier letters. Now it's too late."

The sea crashed up, sea spray dancing above the barricade. Zoro wished it could enter his lungs.

He suddenly felt warmth encircling him, as sweet roses and briny beaches wafted from Sanji's fleece coat.

The blond's hand pressed the top of Zoro's head to the crook of his neck, letting Zoro cry into his turtleneck.

"It's not too late." The blond murmured gently, his other hand rubbing Zoro's back to comfort him. "Your mother is still alive."

"She's not dead yet." Sanji said death like it was easy. The blond said it as if he had been living through it for the past of his life.

Even through his pain, it made Zoro wonder what kind of ugliness the beautiful boy had been through.

As the sea breeze enveloped them both in its gaseous hold, Sanji breathed softly above his head, letting his heartbeat calm Zoro through what felt the rest of time.

The tanned boy could fall asleep and die in his dreams and that would be the perfect, he thinks. If only this warmth could last forever.

"Go look for her." Sanji whispered to him. "You won't regret any more than this."

"You must trust me, Zoro." There was a kind of firmness in his voice that was rare, coming from the blond. "Look for her. Tell her you love her. Say everything."

"...but what if seeing me makes her worse?" Zoro's voice sounded so small for someone so big. "-what if I am the cause of her pain?"

The blond pressed his hands to the sides of Zoro's face, looking into his eyes, darkly.

"It's better to do something and regret, than to not do something and regret it for the rest of your life." Normally the blond was like sunlight, and now he was the light obscured by the moon.

Zoro knew the blond had reasons to insist, and he wished the blond would spill all kinds of darkness within himself and stain him too.

He didn't mind being part of the beautiful boy's darkness.

Zoro looked into those Mariana Trenches of blue irises, and almost forgot he was on earth—and not underwater feeling his lungs collapse.

He slowly nodded and felt his face heat, his heart jumping out of his mouth.

"...Thank you."

The dark clouding the blond's eyes cleared a little, as his gaze looked slightly faraway with longing melancholia, a small smile stretching his lips.

"There's nothing to thank me for, Marimo."

"I already told you I will be here for you."

im so sorry for the previous shitty chapter i had rewrite it and i did a quick sketch of sanji (pretend it's zoro's sketch 😳👌) as an apology i hope this chapter is better please tell me what you think my loves! 😭💓🥲 i will be abit busy these days but the new chapter shld be up soon 👀💪