The Potion Master's Best Friend

Chapter 18- What Severus Did

January 30th soon came around. Lily's birthday. Julia nearly hexed Lockhart on three separate occasions at breakfast alone, as he was following her around like a lost puppy. He continued with his confessions of 'undying love' even when his throat was close to being on the receiving end of an assortment of curses. It took both Severus and Minerva to pull her away from him at the breakfast table. Needless to say, the students had a lot to gossip about.

Julia was slightly subdued that day, as she let memories of her childhood with Severus and Lily overwhelm her. Severus, on the other hand, was more aggressive, giving out twice as many detentions, and even deducting points from Slytherin. However, they somehow both managed to make it through until the evening.

Julia decided to take Severus to Lily's grave for closure. Severus was still conflicted about loving Lily, but knew that his heart now lay with Julia. It was the evening, after classes, when they took a carriage down to Hogsmeade and Apparated.

The Cemetery was empty. Severus held Julia's hand tightly and led her to where Lily was resting. He seemed to know the way, a sure sign that he had visited many times before.

The sun was just setting, the fiery colours exploding into beautiful patterns. The sun itself was red, pulsating almost angrily against the sky. Angry at Lily's death. Like Severus.

He sat himself down on the ground in front of the plot shared by Lily and James Potter. Julia decided to leave him to his thoughts, so walked around the graveyard. She didn't hear Severus softly speaking to the headstone.

"Hi Lily. Happy birthday." He felt his throat constricting, and he hadn't even said five words. "You've missed so much. I love Julia. She loves me. I can't believe it, if I'm perfectly honest. I still miss you, though. There'll always be a special place in my heart for you, but time moves on, and so must I. Julia makes me happy."

He took a deep breath, tears brimming in his eyes. "So I thank you, Lily Evans. I'm glad you never forgave me for calling you a Mudblood. If you had, I wouldn't be the person I am today. I wouldn't have Julia, and I'd still be pining after you. The impossible girl. I realise now that I can no longer have my heart held by a dead woman. You are my past, Julia is my present and hopefully my future. Rest in peace, my love, and thank you."

The tears disobeyed his wishes and snaked down his face in rivulets. Julia walked over, to find Severus shaking with the force of his sobs, chest wracked with emotion. She wordlessly sat down beside him and held him as he wept into her shoulder.

She didn't know how long they spent there. It was dark when they made a move to leave. They both kissed the headstone bearing Lily's name, and Disapparated.

The first thing Severus did when they returned to their quarters was to pour himself a full glass of Firewhiskey, which he drank in one swallow. He was already very inebriated by the time Julia had come back in after changing into her nightwear.

She took the bottle out of his hand, and blew it up. Severus stood up, and wobbled over to her before jabbing a finger in her chest.

"That was my bottle, and you blew it up! Just like that!" He slurred, accompanying his words with hand gestures.

"Sev, you're drunk. Go to sleep." She whispered, slightly afraid of him as he loomed over her.

"You blew up my bottle. But it's fine! I can get another one. And maybe another after that. Or I might pass out, whatever happens first." He stumbled over to the cabinet which Julia knew contained several more bottles of alcohol.

"Sev, go to bed." Julia hadn't moved from where she was standing.

"NO! I AM AN ADULT, AND I DO WHAT I WANT!" He yelled, spit flying from his mouth.

"You sure as hell aren't acting like an adult. You can't drown out your sorrows with alcohol! You have me to talk to now, you don't need that vile stuff!"

"Well you're no good. You're a person. I don't need someone to explain myself to, my bottles don't judge me." He pulled out a fresh bottle and sat himself down on the sofa ungracefully.

"I'm not judging you. I love you, remember?" She said as she tried to wrestle the bottle out of his grip.

"I don't love you. You are stupid, and tainted, and I hate you. I still love Lily." He said as he turned to her, and slapped her around the face. "And that's for being stupid."

Julia felt like a piece of her heart had just been attacked with a sledgehammer. Her eyes brimming with tears, she shakily pulled out her wand.

"I know you don't mean that, you're drunk. Put the bottle down and go to bed. You'll feel better in the morning."

"No. I don't take orders from you, you're just a stupid cow who no one wants. Even I don't want you here. So just GO! Leave me in peace you pathetic wench." He shouted, and threw the bottle at her head. It missed her by inches.

Severus got up to get yet another bottle, and Julia stunned him whilst his back was turned. She levitated him into the bed that they shared, and cast a binding charm that would only release him when he was completely sober.

She hastily scribbled him a note, before grabbing her winter cloak and running out into the night.

A/N Please don't hate me!!! All will be resolved maybe in the next chapter (or the one after), and might be uploaded at the weekend.

I just wanted to take the opportunity to thank some people for their support on this book. First off, thanks to everyone who votes and comments, but especially to drapple_ , DracoDreamer , HazeLilyBluera , justafangirl2001 , snily5ever , flowerhippie1234 and severusdowney for the advice, feedback and comments that make my day! You don't know how much I appreciate it all!!

And my final note. As I am writing this, I have 4.95k reads! That is insane!! Thanks to everyone who has ever read or recommended this story, you are all wonderful! Here is where I leave you, see you in chapter 20!

~Hannah~