Love and Despair (A Hermitcraft Au)

Chapter 1: Always

~~ 

I scream as the latest wave of torture rushes over my body. The Void is hungry, so it feeds off my pain and this time, it decided it wanted me to burn to death.

 The air around me started to heat up. At first, it was just an uncomfortable heat, like running around in the sun during July. Then the temperature kept rising, and rising, and rising, until the heat was unbearable. My skin started to turn red and peel.

I don't want to go into too much detail. Let's just say I was cooked alive.

I died of course, but sadly respawned right back into the The Void, still floating in the endless nothingness. 

I got a few minutes of peace after that, and nodded off into a nightmare-filled nap. 

The pain never went away, though. It never does. That dull ache in my muscles, like I just ran a marathon. Then the wave of intolerable pain, like every bone in my body breaking. Then right back to the ache, like nothing happened.

I got used to it, though. Somehow.

~~

When I woke, The Void decided it wanted to play, and I had no choice but to be it's puppet. It strung my mind up on strings and danced it around the bottomless pit known as self-hatred. 

The thoughts that went through my mind would make even the most emotionless person cringe. They were bone-chilling, gut-wrenching thoughts.

Sobs wracked my body, as I curled up into a small ball. 

Please. Please stop. Please let me go. Please leave me be. Please.

I'm sorry.

~~

This continued for hours. I'd honestly rather be cooked alive. It would hurt less. 

Oh well. Who cares? The Void doesn't. I don't.

Xisuma didn't.

Still, X is the only thing keeping from breaking. Whenever it gets too much, I just think back to when we were young, and it comforts me. 

Because, even if Xisuma doesn't, I still remember the time when we were close. 

The smell of chocolate chip cookies filled our house, and before Mommy even had the treats out of the oven, me and you were already in the kitchen, bouncing around. 

"Alright, alright! Calm down. You can both have one, but they are too hot. Why don't you go play in the living room while they cool down?" Mom asked. 

"Otay Mommy!" We happily skipped away, hand in hand.

"I love you guys" she sang as we hopped away.

"Awways" you said through a giggle.

"An' fowewer" I happily finished.

Do you remember Mom's cookies, X? They were the best.

I screamed as you took my toy car. You already had one! Why did you need mine? 

So I did the only reasonable thing. Jumped at you, hands swinging.

This time you screamed, startled by my sudden attack, and swung your hands up to defend yourself. Sadly, you still had the toy cars in your grip, and I only realised that as one hit me in the temple. 

I crumpled to the floor, defeated. You, of course, dropped the cars and ran to my side, pulling me into your lap like I was dying. I sure felt like it. Tears streamed down my face, as I sobbed in pain. Little did I know, tears were running down your face in regret.