Serendipitous: Zayn's Story

Wings of Time & Emotions

Getting off the airplane, Kate finally felt her heart ease a little. Her hand unconsciously gripped then would release her scarf as her heart felt slightly broken.  Such a wonderful trip had somehow ended in a complete disaster. 

Zayn Malik. Zayn Malik kissed her.  Right in the middle of the ferry getting off Ellis Island.  Even though the kiss had felt so right to her, it apparently had not for him. 

“I’m, I’m so sorry.  Kate.  I didn’t mean…” He had said with wide shocked eyes.  “That was, wasn’t, it wasn’t my intention. Can we just pretend that never happened?” He stuttered as he looked away from her.  

Dumbstruck and slightly hurt she hadn’t been able to respond, merely nodding weakly. 

Remembering the moment again and what happened afterwards…  Dropping her off at the airport, Zayn had been so distant.  He could barely look at her and he hadn’t dared hug her.

 Her lips quivered slightly as she recalled Louis and Niall’s goodbyes to them, her, Ara, and Melina. Niall and Louis.  They were simply wonderful, Kate almost wanted to laugh because she wasn’t sure if  the two were really going to let them go. But Zayn. 

Zayn had been just so cold and distant. Barely looking at her when he did say goodbye.  Even though there was no relationship to speak of, between the two of them, somehow her heart felt absolutely broken.  Now with no one around for her to fake emotions for the tear that had been threatening to fall.  Zayn Malik had kissed her.  But he regretted it while the kiss had only made her fall a little harder. 

Echoes of the intercom asking a Mr. Randall to head to Gate C54 faded as she stopped walking to lean against a wall, out of the way of traffic.  She dropped her hand that had previously been gripping her scarf so it hung by her side.  Fisting both her hands, she dug her nails in her palm slightly so that she didn’t feel so numb. 

She was utterly in love with Zayn Malik.  How could she not be? He remembered her type of coffee.  He somehow bribed the custodian at the Metropolitan to let them in afterhours so that he could go through it with her, without the worry of him being spotted. Therefore the two of them could truly appreciate the art.  He’d taken her to Ellis Island, her absolute must when being in New York.  He had made her laugh till she cried as he talked and joked about his life as a member of One Direction. 

But he did not reciprocate her feelings. 

Closing her eyes Kate took one breath.  Inhaling deeply then exhaling. 

“You’re stronger than this Kate,” she said to herself. “There was never really anything there…” She whispered.  Yet her heart and soul felt sad to her core because it, whatever it was, ended before it ever began.  But, “Sadness flies away on the wings of time.” She quoted Jean de la Fontaine.  Yes.  She would be sad for a bit, her heart wouldn’t let her forget either way, but she was also stronger than this.     She would be okay.

 She had after all left the same airport saying that Zayn only wanted her as a friend.  Now she had no choice but to remember that. Ingrain it into herself.  It didn’t matter that when he kissed her, everything melted away but them.  That it was so sweet she almost thought she was dreaming and any minute, she would wake up to hear Ara taking a shower as she got up before either her or Melina. 

~~~

Zayn’s eyes were shut tight as he held his head between his legs.  He said nothing as he heard Liam in the airplane seat beside him ask if he was okay.  Because he wasn’t.  He had screwed up big time and then responded in the most ass like way. 

The last few days of New York.  After Liam’s crisis, he had realized something. 

He couldn’t help but watch all his mates.  Hope with Harry.  Louis with Melina and Liam with Jolie.  Kate was in love with him.  He wasn’t sure how he knew, but seeing his mates and their others, then looking from a distant at himself and Kate… he wanted to slap himself for being such an idiot. 

And with the whole emotional crisis with Liam, somehow he felt swept away with the tide.  So that night, after Louis and Melina left for the Yankees game, he had convinced Kate to go to the Metropolitan Museum of Art with him.  Needing a distraction from all the drama.

 It was closing but they had managed to run into the main custodian.  With an autograph for his grandniece and a Benjamin, Zayn and Kate had managed to have the place all to themselves for exactly an hour.  He and Kate had also donated money into the museum donations boxes as they went, their laughs echoing in the empty and peaceful place.

It had been wonderful.  He had honestly never had so much fun at a museum in his life. But with Kate it had been wonderful.  The two of them discussed the art, sometimes in depth, other times jokingly.  They had also posed humorously with random sculptures.  Like once when he had posed, showing off his brawns beside Perseus while Kate took a picture, laughing as she teased him that Perseus had nothing on him. 

Any stress he had been feeling had seemed to have evaporated as Kate seemed to become his much needed reliever. When they talked, he let out his frustrations about fame, about how sometimes he felt not ready, that he was afraid he wasn’t the same person who first auditioned for X-Factor.  Instead of giving him advice like most did, she stood there like his rock.  Letting him brush the weight off his shoulders as she smiled calmly at him while looking at him with eyes that told him, he could do no wrong. 

How wrong that was.  He had done a lot wrong.  With the combination of his emotions being a mess with Liam’s situation and then his own being more confused than ever after the night at the Met.  When he and Kate had stood by the railway of the ferry, leaving Ellis Island, he had been caught up in the moment. His mixed emotions of whether he returned Kate’s obvious feelings and whether he wanted to risk his friendship for whatever mess had ended up happening to Liam and Jolie.  He had thrown caution to the wind.  He had said her name softly.  Like expected, she had turned to look at him, a small little grin playing on her lips.  Just as she did so, he had leant down to kiss her square on the lips.  It had been short and sweet.  His heart had felt like as if it were about to fall from his chest.  But his ears had rang immediately afterwards and every bad thought occurred to him.  His relationships with his exes were less than super.  Most of them avoided him like the plague, even when they had been friends beforehand.  But none of them were like Kate, who was simply there and never judging.

He couldn’t risk it. He just couldn’t let her go, so selfishly he had done the only thing he could think of to make sure that their relationship would never end like the rest of his past ones with the girls that he was attracted to. He had stopped and paused, rewinded a little, before any more could be done to take them so far that nothing would ever be the same.

He had stupidly told her it was a mistake when it really wasn’t.  Something that sweet and perfect, couldn’t be a mistake.  He had also asked her to forget it, but who was he kidding.  How could he ask her to forget it when he couldn’t?

To make matter worse, earlier that day, when they were dropping the girls off at the domestic terminal at JFK, he had been unable to face her, to look her in the eyes.  Afraid that he would kiss her again just to see if that perfection he had felt had been real or just him still caught up in the moment. So instead he had practically ignored her. 

“Zayn?” Niall asked after taking a sip of his soda.  “Can I borrow your headphones? Mine sound weird.”

He looked up at last.  His golden brown eyes peering at Niall, almost looking through him.  “I’m so sorry,” He whispered, though not at Niall but to someone far away now. 

Niall arched a brow at the apology, not realizing that it wasn’t for him.  He then shrugged.  He would just try Liam next.