Alive | ør | Asleep •Jyler• 2/2

𝗙𝗼𝗿𝘁𝘆 𝗧𝘄𝗼

"That was a good idea, man." Tyler smiled softly. It went silent for a moment, so Tyler took that opportunity to change the subject to something more light hearted. "Hey, do you remember how we met?" He asked, leaning his back on a tree.

Josh huffed out a small chuckle. "Yeah."

"Did you actually not know where the drums were? Because you weren't even close." Tyler smirked, looking at him for an answer.

"Do you want to know the truth?" Tyler shrugged, and Josh sighed. "You won't whack me with your crutch?"

"C'mon, dude." Tyler huffed.

Josh obliged. "I saw Jenna." He said simply.

Tyler's smirk dropped, his face filled with shock, before he let out a loud puff of air and laughter followed, "really?"

Josh nodded, "what? She was cute! You wanted the truth."

"Then why did you ask me where the drumsticks were?"

"I chickened out." Josh shook his head. "You don't have to worry though, it was a heat of the moment type situation."

Tyler's laughs echoed through the forest as he held his gut to quit the burning feeling. "God, why would I worry? I know nothing will happen about it."

Josh chuckled softly, shaking his head. It went silent for a second, the chuckles dying down and turning into smiles. "You did a good thing, y'know? Talking to her." Josh nodded, "she needed it. I never understood how you got behind her wall though."

Tyler's smile faltered, and he shrugged, "it's a long story. You should read the book we wrote. I sent you a copy."

Josh shook his head, "I'm nervous to read it, you know? I care about her too, and I don't know if I could deal with it put on paper." Josh knew about Carter. He had known for about three years now, ever since the book came out in 2009. He hadn't read the book though. Like he said, he was nervous.

Tyler sighed, a stinging feeling spreading through his chest. He nodded, "yeah, well it was tough to write." Tyler scratched his nose, looking down and rubbing his neck. "I know we've talked about this before but...— I don't know— at the beginning of writing that book she just went down hill, you know? She stopped smiling, and she seemed to distance herself from me so she could write." Tyler adjusted himself in a more comfortable position before continuing, "and I know how that is, you know?... writing songs about depression and anxiety. It..." he took a deep breath, trying to think of the answer. "You really feel it. You distance yourself from the people who make you feel better, just so you can make the song or the story perfect. And that's what she was doing." He picked up some brown leaves and fiddled with them. "I told her, 'hey, maybe we should stop writing this. Maybe we're going too far. I miss you.' You know what she told me?" He sighed, a small smile forming on his face. "She told me 'I can't. People need to hear this story so they don't suffer the same way I did. I'm putting all of my feelings into this book now. But it'll be okay. I'll be okay.'" Tyler looked up at Josh who was listening intently. "After that, things got better. She began to smile more than I had ever seen her. And she said that she felt comforted, and more safe than she had ever felt before. The book really helped her, you know? I mean, she can talk to guys now without fidgeting or even feeling anxious. That's a big improvement from when I met her. Writing that book helped her more than I could ever. The thing is, is that it wasn't the book that cured her endless sadness, it was herself." Tyler bit the inside of his lip before looking up at Josh. "If you get a chance, please read it..." he paused as he thought of a reason, "she wants people to know."

Josh took a deep breath, deciding to join Tyler on the ground with his back against the tree. "Okay." Tyler huffed out a small chuckle once he realized his long speech. He did that a lot to the point Josh and his other friends were used to it. He just thought so much that sometimes he had to. Josh suddenly spoke up after a moment of silence. "Are you going to show your daughter?"

Tyler immediately took a breath in, shaking his head as if he was unsure. "I don't know, man. It's messed up. Especially if it's your parents. I mean, it could totally ruin her mental state no matter how old she is." He bit his lip. "And god, that scares me so much thinking about it."

Josh nodded, "she'll most likely find it eventually. That book is being devoured by the clique."

Tyler nodded, letting out a sigh. "Yeah, so is the forest fic, and she'll never read that. That'll mess her up even more."

Josh chuckled, "well, lucky you. You don't have to think about it right now. All you have to worry about is raising her right so that she'll be able to take it."

"Oh yeah, no pressure at all." Tyler sassed, Josh chuckled.

"Boys! Food!" Jenna called, and Tyler hummed, a small smile forming on his lips.

◉‿◉

This is a long chapter. Kind of personal too. This is exactly what I did to write book one. I locked myself up in my room and my depression got worse until I finally finished the book and I have never felt better! Writing music and books really help me. I hope there is something out there that helps you too. ♥️