Recover (Larry Stylinson AU)

Chapter Nine; Confusion

One of the most amazing feelings in the world is having someone fall in love with you who you thought you never had a chance with.
- @LoveQuotes on Twitter

Harry was feeling someting he hadn't felt in a long time; he was feeling content. It'd been a month since Zayn had visited him. Not only had he slowly started mending his relationship with Zayn, he was also starting to open up to Louis, which was something he'd never dreamed of doing, with anyone.

There were only some minor things bothering him. One, his mum was starting to look a lot happier now. He knew it wasn't something he should be concerned about--he should be happy for her--but she had also been out of the house a lot, which was a surprise, since she usually stayed home to take care of the house, and of Gemma and Harry. The second thing bothering him was the fee. He'd been going to quite a bit of the therapy sessions, and although they never asked, Harry knew he had to pay. But how? He didn't have any spare money, he was saving it up for college. He'd already applied to a couple restaurants and bookstores, and none of them had called back yet.

The last thing that was bothering Harry was Louis Tomlinson. 

He'd been sending Harry mixed signals all month. One day, he'd be laughing and smiling with Harry and putting his hand on his knee, while other days he'd stay rooted in his chair, staring at Harry with an unreadable expression and maintaining the strictly business environment. Harry didn't understand if Louis liked him or not. He'd debated asking Zayn about it, but soon decided that he didn't want Zayn to know quite yet that he was crushing on his therapist. Plus, he would most certainly ask why Harry had a therapist in the first place, which was a question Harry wasn't ready to answer.

But if he couldn't tell Zayn, then who could he tell? He couldn't tell his mum or sister, and he had no other friends. Harry was confused and unsure, and he liked talking out his problems, but what if he had no one to tell?

*~*~*

"So, Harry. What'd you like to talk about today?"

Harry almost shrugged, but then he quickly stopped. "Yeah, I. Um. Is it alright if I talked about something today? It's about someone at my school. Uh. Yeah."

Louis looked shocked for a second, because he was usually the one that prompted Harry to talk, but he looked pleased nonetheless. "Absolutely, Harry. Go ahead."

"Alright. So, basically. This has actually been on my mind for a while. I've just. I've been thinking. This guy at my school. I kinda, sorta, maybe, like him? And I don't know, I thought that he liked me too, I guess? But lately, he's been sending me mixed signals and I just. I don't know if he likes me back or not. And the thing is, I've been beating myself over him a lot lately, so I just wanna know if he likes me back or not so I can just forget about it."

Louis' eyes flashed with something that looked like jealousy, but Harry dared not hope. "Why don't you ask him?"

"But, like. If I ask him and he says no, then I'm just going to go back to my lighter. I don't want to risk that, not when I'm not confident that I'll be able to take it. I just. I want to know, without anyone directly telling me, I guess?"

"I'm glad you know your limits, Harry," Louis said, smiling proudly in a way that made Harry's stomach flutter. He instantly banished the innappropriate thoughts to the back of his head, telling himself that he should stick to his plan. 

Last night, Harry hadn't been able to fall asleep. So, instead, he stayed up for a couple of hours, trying to figure out how to know whether Louis liked him or not without confessing. And that was when it had hit him. Maybe, if he talked about a guy in his therapy session, then Louis would get jealous. That is, if Louis felt the same. 

"But, yeah. I'm, like, not sure, on how to know without confessing, so. And, like. He's such a wonderful person."

"Yeah? What's he like?"

"He's nice to me, he makes me smile, and he just. He treats me like a normal person. And it's, like. I don't really like him, exactly, I just. I like who he makes me. I like who I am when I'm with him. If that makes sense? And, I'd really like to know how he feels about me but... I don't know. How?"

Louis' jaw was clenched, and for a wonderful moment, Harry allows himself to think that it's because he's jealous, but he knows better. Louis couldn't be jealous. In fact, he didn't even know why he tried this in the first place, because he'd probably see everything Louis did as jealousy. 

"You could try to make him jealous, maybe? Like, be really touchy-feely with other people when you're around, or you could make up a guy and pretend to be in love with him, or have someone pose as your boyfriend. That could work."

Harry smiled, although it was a little forced. Damn it, why couldn't there just be a sign on his head that said He's jealous or He's not jealous? That would make this so much easier. 

*~*~*

"Hiya, Zayn. Mind coming with me to the groceries?"

"Ew. But fine, I guess I'll come, but only for you!"

Harry laughed, slapping Zayn in the face as he tried to kiss his cheek. "Fuck off, Zayn."

"Hey, who's the one that was begging me to come grocery shopping with you, like, two seconds ago?"

"I wasn't begging you, Zayn. You were so eager that you didn't even need me to beg."

The two boys continued their banter on their way to the store, and by the time they got there, Harry was smiling and laughing, completely forgetting about all of his problems, assignments, and insecurities. 

Zayn wrapped his arms around Harry, pouting and saying, "Aw, come on, baby, don't reject me!"

Harry laughed, letting himself get hugged from behind by Zayn. He pretended to pout. "Well, you like that girl more than you like me, so I'm upset."

"I'd never cheat on you, you should know that!" 

Harry laughed, finally shoving Zayn away and starting to look around for the potatoes, milk, and bread he was supposed to be getting today. His mum had wrote him a list of things to buy before she'd left. 

"Harry?"

Harry's eyes widened and his breath hitched as he heard the familiar voice. He could feel his heart as it started beating faster, and he gulped. 

"Louis?" He asked, turning around and plastering on a fake smile. "Running into each other at the grocery store seems to be turning into a habit, yeah?"

Louis laughed, although his face still seemed tense. Harry wasn't sure why; whas there something bothering him? But he didn't ask, pretending that everything was okay and he didn't know how Louis' fist was clenched. 

*~*~*

Harry talked with Zayn and Louis for a bit, until Zayn claimed that "If he didn't get home, his mum was going to skin him alive." So Harry let him go, giving him a long hug and a whispered "Thank you," before Zayn left.

When he turned around, Louis' face was red. 

Harry frowned. "What's wrong, Louis? You okay? You look a little ... Red."

Louis tried forcing out a laugh, saying that he was fine, but Harry didn't believe him for a second. He asked a second time, telling him that he could spot a liar from a mile away. 

And then Louis kissed him. 

A/N: Aww yeee! Things are finally turning interesting! Once again, sorry for mistakes. And also, IMPORTANT, PLEASE READ: GO ON MY PROFILE, I HAVE AN UPDATE ON WHY THE CHAPTERS HAVE BEEN COMING OUT SLOW, SO GO READ IT & TELL ME WHAT TO DO BECAUSE I WANT TO WRITE, BUT... YEAH. JUST READ THE MESSAGE THAT I POSTED ON MY PROFILE. That's all, until next time!
- Amy. xx