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IT DIDN'T matter how many times Five jumped in front of Natalia or how hot on her trail Luther was, because Natalia did nothing to make them feel better about themselves. She was beyond pissed and no amount of frantic apologies or Luther screaming at her to come back would change that.
"No! Nope!" Natalia yelled as she shoved Five aside.
"Tal, come on. I'm sorry." Five tried to protest.
"Fuck you."
"Guys, doomsday is still coming." Luther reminded as he finally caught up to the two. "We need a new plan."
"Since when do you care about doomsday?" Natalia asked as she shot Luther a look.
"Since I'm the one that's stuck here with it."
"That didn't seem to phase you before." Natalia spat.
"Don't you get it Luther?" Five scoffed. "It's over, all right? We're already dead."
"Then where are you going?" Luther questioned as Natalia finally reached the top of the stairs.
"Away from here." Natalia said as she pointed a stern finger at each of them. "If I'm going to die it's going to be away from you two imbeciles."
"Come on, Tal. Are you seriously that mad?" Five asked as he followed her towards the door to Elliott's place.
"I'm going to Italy." Natalia declared. "So tell Vanya to wait maybe three days before blowing up the fucking moon again."
"Italy? What?" Luther asked
"No, you're not going to Italy." Five argued.
Natalia stopped in her tracks and turned to face him. If looks could kill, Five was sure he'd be dead. "Watch me." And with that she slammed the apartment door in their faces.
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"Ci vediamo dopo ragazzi!" Natalia called as she walked out of one of Elliott's spare rooms with a bag full of clothes.
"Natalia, what the hell are you doing?" Luther in utter confusion as he switched his gaze from Five to Natalia.
Natalia raised her left brow as she pulled her sunglasses down to the bridge of her nose. "What does it look like I'm doing? I'm going to Italy."
"Not yet you aren't."
Natalia turned her head to face Five who stood in the center of the kitchen pouring baby powder down his pants. "Do I even want to know what you're doing?"
"You do have a plan." Luther accused.
"A plan?" Natalia asked as she looked in between the two. "What the hell kind of a plan requires you to sprinkle baby powder down there?"
"Well, it's a desperation move, but since our brain dead siblings are incapable of meeting a simple deadline..." Five explained as he walked over to Natalia and grabbed her bag of luggage from her hands. "I'll take that darling." Before Natalia could even protest Five spoke again, finishing his original sentence. "I got no choice."
"No choice but what?" Luther asked.
"I have to find myself." Five let out a heavy sigh as he dug through his pockets and eventually pulling out a pocket watch. "I just arrived in Dallas fifteen minutes ago."
"Should I be worried about you?" Luther asked.
"Luther, if you recall..." Five began as he started to stretch.
"What are you doing?" Natalia asked as she watched him touch his toes in confusion.
"I was sent to 1963 on a job by the commission to make sure the president was assassinated."
"Oh! So wait, your old self is out there." Luther concluded.
"Precisely."
"What, just walking around Dallas?" Luther asked.
"Walking around Dallas with a briefcase that can get us home."
"Oh, my God. Five, you're a genius."
"However, there are two significant problems with this plan."
"Number one: I don't get to go to Italy. Number two: I inevitably die beside imbeciles." Natalia grumbled.
"No." Five said as he put his blazer on. "Problem number one: I am a trained assassin, arguably the most dangerous assassin in this space-time continuum."
"You're being arrogant." Natalia interrupted.
"If I know me, I'm not going to react kindly to bumping into myself." Five continued, ignoring Natalia. "Problem number two, and this is the real fly in the ointment here: you're not supposed to exist in close proximity to yourself in the same timeline. The side effects can be disastrous."
"Side effects what sort of side effects?" Luther asked.
"Well according to the Commission Handbook Chapter 27, subsection 3b..."
"You memorized that shit?" Natalia asked.
"I was bored, Natalia." Five defended. "Anyway, the seven stages in paradox psychosis are stage one: denial. Two: itching. Three: extreme thirst and urination. Four: excessive gas. Five: acute paranoia. Six: uncontrolled perspiration. And seven: homicidal rage."
"Homicidal rage?" Luther questioned.
"Yeah." Five confirmed.
"Jeez, I don't know. This maybe isn't such a good idea." Luther said.
"It's a Hail Mary." Five said as he threw his hands up. "What choice do we have Luther?"
"I'll just pull some Peggy Carter shit on him, grab the brief case and go."
"Peggy....What?" Five asked.
"You know, Steve Rogers and Peggy Carter. You're the old man stuck in the future and I'm the bad ass woman you left behind." Natalia explained.
"Oh shit! Yeah Steve Rogers and Peggy Carter!" Luther exclaimed with a wide grin as he pointed to Natalia.
"I don't even know old you and he's already mybitch." Natalia firmly stated as she proudly crossed her arms over her chest.
