Stepbrother - Bellarke fanfic

Chapter 26

~ R E L I E F ~

Clarke's POV

I woke up in the guest room. I checked my surroundings and my eyes landed on Bellamy, sleeping on a chair next to my bed. And then, everything went back. The bath, the scars, waking up in the middle of the night with Bellamy by my side. It was morning, and he still was by my side. He slept there, the thought made me smile. I sat on my bed and it's just at that moment that I recognized I spent the night in the guest room in my house. I wasn't in my bedroom or Bellamy's. Piper. Piper was all alone upstairs. I quickly got up from the bed and felt a small pain on the side of my head. It caused me to wince. Bellamy woke up, alarmed at the sound. His eyes searched the room until they landed on mine. He sighed in what I believe was relief. I turned around, my back on his gaze while I watched myself in the mirror. I had a wound and about three stitches on the side of my head. That means my mom knew about this.

"You should rest, you passed out." Bellamy finally spoke in his husky morning voice. I looked at him in the mirror, he was also looking at me through the glass of the mirror.

"I got to get to Piper." I simply relied. I walked towards the door when Bellamy followed and gently grabbed my wrist. He swung me around so I was looking at him.

"Your mom is taking care of her. What happened yesterday, one second you were all fine but the other you passed out?" He asked me, eyes full of concern.

"I just had some flashback about what happened with Finn." He blinked and stared at the ground a few seconds before breaking the silence once again.

"Your mom, she-" my mom interrupted whatever he was going to tell me when my mom bursted through the doors, Piper in her arms. She smiled when she saw me and hugged me tightly after Bellamy grabbed Piper from her arms.

"Clarke, honey! How is your head?"

"Fine, thanks."

"No problem. By the way, Piper is worse than you were when you were just a baby. She doesn't sleep much, I don't know how you do it!" She said while pressing her finger on Piper's small nose, a big smile on both of their faces. She turned around to look at me and held out her hand.

"Come, I need to speak with you. Bellamy, are you-"

"It's fine, I got Piper." He said while shaking her petite body in his strong arms. I took my mom's hand and she led me to the kitchen downstairs. She grabbed a glass from the cabinet and poured cold water in it before handing it to me. I took a long sip.

"So, what did you want to talk about." I asked my mother. Even though I asked, I thought I knew exactly what she wanted to talk about. My panic attack, that's what I thought she'd talk to me about. Not what came out of her mouth next. She cleared her throat and swallowed hard. She took a deep breath and began.

"I know what you have been through is hard. And I really think it could make a huge difference if you would, hum, go to therapy." She said maintenant eye contact. I frowned.

"Therapy?" I asked, unsure of my feelings towards this new therapy thing.

"You don't talk to me. You don't talk to anyone about what happened in the bunker. You tell everyone that your fine but you are not. And I thought, if you aren't able to talk to me, maybe you would be able to open up with the other girls from the bunker, only them. A lady called, two days ago, Mrs. Ryan. She is attending therapy sessions with the girls from the bunker. Only them, but all of them. They are all coming and I really thought it could do a lot of good. An hour every week. That's all, we'll take care of Piper. So, what do you say?" She explained. I closed my eyes trying to understand all the information she just gave me. I sighed loudly when I opened my eyes again, my mom still staring at me with hope in her eyes. She was right. I didn't like or want to open up about the bunker with my family. They already saw me weak, I didn't want them to know what I did when I was at my weakest. I didn't like to talk about it either, I thought it would bring back all the memories and therefore give me panic attack just like what happened the day before. But maybe, talking about it would free me in a way, nothing else could. Especially with he girl that have been through what I also have. They understood like nobody else and I knew they would not judge me for my weak choices. My mother, she was right, again.

"Yeah, Okay. When does it start?" I asked. My mother smiled and sighed happily. She clapped her hands in happiness and threw herself in my arms.

"Tomorrow, Bellamy will drive you. I'm sorry i can't, tomorrow I have work and I can't be the one who drives you. At 2pm." She said in my ear still hugging me tightly, like I would vanish at any second.

_________

The day went on fast, considering I woke up at 11 am. It was just another day, like any other one. I took care of Piper, hung out with Octavia and Bellamy, as step siblings.

And then, in a blink of an eye, there I was. Laying in my bed, the lights off. Piper was sleeping in her small bed in the corner of the room. Meanwhile I was just staring at my ceiling. Thinking. And thinking. How are the girls holding up? Will they be happy to see me again, will I? Will the therapy really help? Could I someday get over all the drama that happened to me in my life? Did the girls miss me? Because I did. I thought about them every single day since I've been freed from that bunker. I thought about Luna, helping me out with Piper. Lexa as well, the kind girl who helped me out in my first days down there. Did the girls miss Piper? Probably, they loved her so much. I wrote myself a mental note, I should bring Piper at least once to the therapy sessions, they would love to see her again.

I thought about everything that I did in the bunker. And one memory came back, instantly.

I was in my room. Looking at myself in my small mirror. I was so skinny, so full of bruises, so ugly. I cried and I cried. Thinking about my mother, my friends, my poor Raven. I punched the mirror out of anger. Finn. I hated him. I had already been in the bunker for three weeks. And I was sick. Nausea, vomiting, horrible headaches. I was not doing fine. When I broke the mirror, I grabbed a sharp broken piece of glass. I took it in my hands, and pressed it against my neck. Crying even harder than I did earlier. I was ready to go away. To give up. To stop fighting. To be at peace. To be free. I was ready to end my life on the spot. But then, Lexa barged in the room and stopped dead in her tracks when she saw what I was doing.

"Clarke please, you don't need to do this. We will be happy again, we will be free someday. Don't stop fighting. Don't give up yet. Don't lose hope. Please Clarke." She begged me.

"Lexa, I can't do this any—" I didn't get to finish my sentence. I was running towards the toilet bowl, and threw up my entire meal. I groaned as I drank a little bit of water. Lexa looked at me with wide eyes.

"Huh?" I asked.

"Clarke, how long have you been vomiting? Do you have any backache, headache, tiredness??" She asked me, ignoring my eyes full of confusion.

"Yeah, how do you know all that? For a week and a half I think?" I said. She swallowed hard and sighed. She cleared her throat.

"Clarke, are you late?" She asked me. My eyes widened, not at the question but at what she was insinuating. I understood everything now. It made perfect sense.

"Yes, you think, I'm pregnant?" I asked her worriedly. I was only a teenager, I wasn't ready to have a kid. Then I thought back to the first night I passed in the bunker. Me asking Finn for a notebook, him telling me the price. Me doing what he wanted, he probably didn't use protection. And now, there I was with a baby growing in my stomach.

Lexa nodded. She smiled, and wrapped her arms over my bruised body.

"You know what that means? You can't give up, not now. You hold on and keep hoping for your child to see the ground, your family, your house. You do that for that child." She whispered in my ear. I nodded as tears still rolled down my face. That's how Piper saved me for the very first time. She was my hero.

At one point, fatigue took over and I drifted off to sleep. 

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A/N
This chapter is dedicated to annoying______. She is the one that came up with the whole group therapy idea. Thank you.

Thanks for reading, as always, please vote, comment or share if you enjoyed.

Very appreciated my loves, 💕💕💕