(DISCONTINUED) The Secret | Tony Lopez x Nick Austin

Chapter 20 - Lost

Tony's pov

"Nick?" Tayler's voice rang in my ears as I whirled around. Standing there was Nick in the doorway. Fear covered my face.

"So. What exactly happened while I was gone? What will I be ruined by?" Nick asked, suspiciously looking at us.

Fuck. He heard us talking. "Uh... I- it's nothing. D- don't worry about it." I stuttered, trying to play it off.

"Yea, I'm sure it's nothing. I'll go. Don't expect me to not assume things." Nick spat, tears threatening to fall from his eyes. He turned on his heel and headed towards his room, the sound of it slamming echoing through the house.

"Fuck! What am I gonna do?" I panicked, pacing back and forth. Tayler watched me, shrugging. "I have to tell him. Right? I don't have a choice..."

"You're going to tell him? Do you know what that'll do?" Tayler questioned.

"I don't have a choice!" My voice broke and I collapsed onto my bed. It wasn't even an accident. I let Tayler do that. And now Nick will never forgive me... I finally stood, pushing past Tayler and storming off towards Nick's room.

I knocked on the door, trying to keep my tears from falling. "Go away." Nick groaned, annoyed, from inside.

I lowered my head, looking at my shoes. Biting my lip, I gained the courage to speak. "Please-" My voice ended up cracking anyways. "I need to talk with you, Nick..."

There was a small moment of silence before his hurt voice spoke from just the other side of the door. "Why. Give me one reason."

I could tell he's crying. I mean, I'm almost crying. "Because... Because I love you." I clamped my eyes shut, attempting to calm my breathing. The door suddenly swung open. I quickly gazed up. "Nick, I'm so, so sorry-"

"For what? Huh? Did you forget the fact you never told me? There was obviously something. Better say it now before I slam this fucking door." His eyes were bloodshot and tear marks covered his cheeks. He looked so broken. I could barely look at him.

"Listen, please. I was confused. I wasn't thinking right-"

"JUST FUCKING TELL ME!" Nick yelled, making me jump.

I took in a shaky breath, ready to probably get slapped. "I cheated on you. I'm so sorry Nick. I didn't want to. I don't know what I was thinking. Please... please forgive me." I let the tears roll down my face. Nick just stared at me, tears falling from his eyes as well.

He finally took in an uneven breath. "Leave... Just go." He said in only a whisper.

"Nick, please don't do this. I didn't mean to-"

"LEAVE! Let me think for a while, ok? I can't look at you right now." He glanced away from me, resting his weight on the door frame.

"I can't lose you. Forgive me, I beg you." I begged, nearly dropping to my knees. I was able to steady myself, however.

"I don't want to see you, Tony!" Nick raised his voice, grabbing the door. "I THOUGHT WE WERE IN LOVE!" He slammed the door.

I stood there, staring blankly. I couldn't even think straight. Everything felt distant. It's like I was watching a movie. A horror movie. Tayler came to my side, speaking. I couldn't even hear him. It was all so distant. I was broken. I was lost. I knew I shouldn't have. But I did. Then I had to face Nick. I couldn't imagine loosing him. He turned my world around. I turned away from Tayler and began walking down the hall. I didn't know where I was going. If I lost Nick I wouldn't be able to live with myself. I'd rather die than loose him. I can't afford that. People need me. But I need him more. What have I done...

Nick's pov

I slammed the door in Tony's face, swirling around and collapsing on my bed. After everything we've been through... How could he. He ruined me. Why would he do this. I loved him. He loved me. I guess I was wrong. I can't even thinking about loosing him. I'd get even worse. Sure, I have other people to talk to. But they aren't Tony. I need him. Him and only him.

But he clearly doesn't need me.

Tayler's pov

I watched Tony walk off. I've never seen him like this. It's like he was a completely different person. This was my fault. I made him do it when I shouldn't have. Now they are both heartbroken. I'm not entirely sure if they broke up. I kinda hope not. I'd feel even worse. Neither of them said anything remotely close to 'we're over.' I guess that's a good thing, right? I hope. If I hadn't come to Tony's room earlier this would have never happened. None of this. I need to fix this one way or another. I'm not sure how. Neither want to see me right now. I understand that. There's got to be a way. They can't just walk away from each other like that. After all they've been through. It's like they were meant for each other. And I ruined it. Somehow, one was or another, I need to fix this.

I cant believe we're already at chapter 20. This book has come so far and I'm so happy. Thank you guys so much. I love each and every one of you. You guys brought me through one of my lowest times about a month or 2 ago. I cried writing this chapter 😭

Also DONT WORRY. they didnt break up........... yet 😭

jk

or am I?

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