Tears

Wednesday Daddy's House

"I told you not to have an attitude, and you laugh," he states. What attitude? I think. I stare off to the distance as he talks to Simon. "At least say 'sorry',".
Simon then mumbles sorry. I get off the seesaw so Simon can have a reason to leave too, while our dad has gone back to his phone, not realizing how his reaction effects us.

We start playing 'the stealing the baby' game again. It turns into a parent calling the police, and the thief being an alien. We play 'alien acting like human' game for a while.
It's so much fun to act.

"Can we go now?" Simon asks.

"Only if you catch the ball in a long distance," my dad replies.

Simon catches on the first Good throw. Emphasize good throw.                       

Even after Simon caught the ball, we still stay at the park for about 10 minutes. We're on the swings as one person throws the ball to a person on the swing. 

"Guess a number 1 through 60," our dad starts off the game, as the game goes on, it's my turn.

When it gets to my turn, I think of the number 6 for Simon and dad to guess.

"56," Simon asks.

"Close," I answer because it has a 6 in it. And well.... this gets them a bit confused. Continuing to guess, my dad gives up.

"I give up...My turn," My father states and gets off the swing.

"It was 6," I tell them calmly. 

"You lied," My dad accuses me. "You said it was close to 56," he explains when my face turns cold. 

"Ya because 56 has a 6," I start to laugh, realizing how stupid I sound.

"You lied," he repeats. I stop laughing.

We are no longer at the park. We're at home eating on the balcony. I don't remember how the conversation started but...

"Do you guys want to go to school with a mask?" My dad asks with disgust.

"Sure. I would wear it if I had to. If not I wouldn't," I state. 

"No.No.No. I'm not letting you go to school with masks," It's our lives, - I think. My face turns to disbelief and anger.

"I like some kinds of masks," Simon says,"I like the ones that make you look like ducks."

"When do you wear masks," he asks, clearly mad.

"With mamma," Simon answers.

"Ya," I say

"When?" My father asks, but it's not like a question with curiosity...No!... He looks appalled at the idea, giving us a look of disapproval.

"When we go to the store," My brother answers.

"Why?" He asks, his face turning red.

"Because we have to," he says. Like, Duh.

"Because it prevents the spread of of covid,"My brother speaks. I am so annoyed and pissed. I try to explain to him that if we did have the virus and didn't wear the mask, an old person could die. 

"There's no proof," he says after I explain. What do you mean no proof? 

"You are not wearing a mask," he says, finalizing the decision as if it's not up for discussion any longer.

"But I like wearing masks," I state, looking at him. Even though it's not completely true, what other way will he understand?

"You are not wearing a mask. Why would you go to the store with a mask, when you know I don't like them?" he scolds us. What is wrong with him? I am outraged of his simple STUPID Stupidity. I look away as he goes inside to grab seconds of food.

"Oh my goodness," I whisper, wanting to yell, cry, anything. The pain in my head with the words in my mind.

"Who cares if he doesn't like masks. It's our lives," I whisper. Simon agrees as he nods.

"Why was he even whispering?" Simon asks.

"Because his heart knows that what he's saying is stupid, and doesn't want others to hear." I state.

I go to the bathroom, washing off my face. Simon walks in and whispers, "I was cleaning off the table and he says,'Thank you. You are such a good boy even if I'm hard on you' Is that a compliment?" I look at the mirror. My face very serious and I burst into laughter by the face I'm making.

"I'm going to speak to your mother about this," These words are playing in my mind as I remember my dad's threats from the balcony.