Kidge One Shots

Online Dating

So I'm struggling getting myself back to writing. Hence a one shot instead of a continuation of a story. Hopefully I get my focus back soon. Any mistakes are all mine and please leave a comment! Also, please look into my other stories if you like what I'm writing here :)

Pidge did a thing...chaos ensues.

Pidge rolled over and contemplated her chances of being able to fall back asleep. Squinting she could see the sun blazing behind her dark out blinds and decided she probably shouldn't roll over and go back to sleep. She held her breath and almost said forget it, getting ready to roll over when she heard a buzz from her phone. Dang, talk about fate. Then another buzz. Uh oh. Roiling over she dived for her phone and quickly unlocked to see who was texting her. As she was looking at her phone, a strange icon caught her attention but she ignored it in favor of going to her messages. To discover her inbox strangely full.

Frowning she sits up, absently rubbing her eyes and flicks thru the messages. HOLY SHIT!!!! What did she do???

Pidge frantically scrolls through her inbox. OMG. OMG. This cannot be right. She immediately calls Veronica, yelling once she picks up, "How much did I drink last night?!? WHY DO YOU HATE ME????"

Hours later in the Garrison lounge...

Ina, Veronica, Acxa and Pidge are sitting around a table. Pidge's phone is sitting in the middle of the table, vibrating. She's staring at it like it's a rattlesnake.

Veronica's voice breaks the silence, "It's really not that bad of an idea Pidge! No one forced you, I mean, you might not have been sober but, you still did it. Aren't people supposed to be more honest when they are drunk?"

Ina instantly replies, "Surprisingly, you are right. Published research proves that statement is accurate. When drinking alcohol, the tongue or more accurately mind, is freed up to say exactly what is in a person's heart. As blood alcohol levels continue to climb, the responses become increasingly primitive or in other words honest. Simply put, researchers were able to show, in multiple studies, that alcohol consumption does not prevent self-control—it just makes people care less about the consequences. So I guess this is what you wanted?"

Pidge lets her head bang onto the table. Damn it. Maybe she was lonely, maybe she was missing companionship but online dating was not was she was looking for. She wanted...

Acxa interjected, "So each of these messages are all from potential mates? That meet your specified parameters? And they are all interested in you? This seems like an effective way to find a mate. Why are you upset?"

Pidge bangs her head on the table again. Fuck. My. Life.

Veronica laughs, "Yeah Pidge, why are you upset? Maybe because you already had someone in mind? Someone taller than you with an athletic build? Someone who you can talk to but has a life so when you get involved in a project he'd understand? Someone who sounds remarkably  like my brother or "

"Enough. Seriously your brother is not over Allura and I can't even go there with you right now. At her nod, Pidge sighed in relief, continuing, "Sooooo help me figure out what to do with these messages, kay? Can I just say I changed my mind and delete myself?"

At the group's negative reaction, Pidge groaned. "Well, what do you want me to do? Date them all?" Pidge realized her hands were waving around crazily and quickly put them back on the table. Grabbing her water she took a drink and continued more calmly, "Obviously the algorithm is faulty, there is no way all these guys meet my, um, preferences."

Veronica nodded, "True. Let me pull up your profile and see if I can adjust the settings. We got you Pidge."

Pidge smiled at the group of girls around her. The only girl who was missing was Romelle but she had a good excuse, she was busy getting her driver's license something that she was looking forward to doing for some time. And while Pidge wished Allura could be with them as well, she really felt her presence. Before Allura, Pidge really wasn't friends with girls. She was mostly a loner with Matt. But after a space, well, she had learned how to be friends and depend on others. These girls, no women, were a blessing while being a complete pain.

The next day, Pidge decided to work on a project to keep her mind off her phone when Matt walks in. She gives a half hearted wave when he sits down in front of her. Staring at her. Annoyed she ignores him.

"Pidge, is there something you want to tell me?"

Glancing up, she shakes her head no but he continues to stare. "What? I'm busy here Matt."

At his continuing stare she stops what she's doing and finally looks at him. He looks too...happy. Like he's waiting to say something stupid. At her arched brow, he pulls out his phone, "So did you write this or did Veronica??"

ACK!!! Why is showing her...HER profile?!?

Meanwhile, Hunk is telling Lance what some of the sous chefs were talking about during lunch. While Hunk thought it might ignite Lance's interest and humor, he seriously underestimated the reality of the situation.

Currently he was holding the phone away from his ear, while Lance squawked and yelped about strange men dating their girl. While Hunk could appreciate the sentiment, he didn't think Pidge would. But when he tried telling Lance, somehow, it ended up with Lance saying he was coming to visit. Hunk sat and looked at Shay, "This stays between us. I'm NOT telling Pidge that I'm the reason Lance is visiting...and hopefully he doesn't either! Oh, man, she is not going to be happy. Well, maybe if she finds a guy but, oh dude, Lance is coming here!"

Elsewhere, Acxa is detailing to the group how to find a mate when Keith walks in. He nods to the group, hoping to make a quick exit. While he appreciates his team, they can be a bit much. Hoping to escape before getting pulled into the conversation, he quickly goes to grab some forms and when his mom, of all people, calls his name. Sighing he pauses, "Huh? I've got to do some reports for the Garrison, I'll be done later. I can come to your room if you need something. Unless it's um, urgent."

Krolia replies, "Okay, I just wondered why you have not used this superior mate device."

Keith pauses, "Huh?"

Acxa fills in, "Yes, I was just telling everyone how Pidge was receiving many mate requests from her entry. Your people have found a way to stream line the mating process and "

"WHAT?"

"Um have you not been informed? There is a mate matching program that can help you find your perfect match. It is most intriguing. Pidge has found many matches and we told her she should try them out."

Zethrid loudly states, "Yes, she should copulate with them all and see which one is the best. Why settle?! It sounds like she has her pick, she might as well find one that is attractive and satisfies her!"

Keith starts to choke on nothing. Essentially just air. His mom comes over and slaps his back, "Better?"

Keith chokes out, "Whatprogramareyoutalkingabout?"

Once Keith gets back to his room, he throws himself on the bed and quickly punches up the app. Why would she use something like this? He thought she would want some time alone. Not to date. Or to mate.

He quickly finds her profile and recognizes that while it is completely accurate she did not write this. It's not her wording or style. Which is something of a relief. But, if she starts to date the guys then what? What could he really do?

His phone rings and he absently answers. "Hey."

"Keith! Oh my God, Pidge is on a dating app and she plans on DATING strangers. Hunk and Matt think it's a good idea!
I'm coming to Earth now, you gotta meet me. Help me stop her! This isn't how you find someone you love. I"

"Yes, when will you be here?"