Confessions of the Fragile Heart

Chapter 21

I woke on a hospital bed again. My mouth felt dry. My stomach was sore. I tried to examine myself. I seemed to be okay. I touched my stomach instinctively. It hurt, but I was more distracted because the bump was gone. My Adalyn was gone. I pressed the nurse button; I was starting to get anxious. My mom, Heather, Denver, and the nurse all walked in. Heather handed me a glass of water. I drank it impatiently.

"Where's Adalyn?" I asked. My voice was weary. My body was slumped against the bed. Denver looked hurt. My mom smiled at me sadly. Her eyes glistened.

"She's alive," she breathed. A wave of relief swept through me. The nurse cut in by explaining.

"Adalyn was... premature. You were... a good 6 months, so Adalyn will have to stay until she's fully developed. You were passed out when you had already gone into labor, so we did a C-section," the nurse explained. I lifted my hospital gown under the covers and looked at my stomach. There was a line starting in the middle and going down. I sighed and looked around the room again.

"Where is she? Can I see her?" I asked desperately. She shook her head.

"You're too weak right now. As soon as you're well enough, you will be allowed to see her virtually any time you want," she answered.

"When will that be?" I asked. Pain weaved through my voice. Tears stung my eyes threatened to spill over. She looked uneasy.

"A month or two," she practically whispered. My tears spilled over. I closed my eyes and slumped further into the bed. I didn't bother to open my eyes again. I heard a few sad sighs and shuffling. Once I heard the door open and close, I opened my eyes again. My mom, Heather, and Denver were sitting around the room. I wiped my tears quickly. My mom rushed to my side.

"It's okay to be upset," my mom said. She pulled me into a hug. My tears flowed freely. I wanted to see her. "Adalyn is fine." She assured me. I wiped my tears as they came. After a second, I looked over to Denver. Heather caught the look and quickly shoveled my mom out of the room as she left. Denver came beside me and kissed my forehead. I sighed and lifted my head to look at him.

"She looks just like you," he smiled. "She has my eyes. She's beautiful." Happy tears spilled over.

"You've seen her?" I smiled sadly. He nodded slowly. I closed my eyes. My hand rested on my scared stomach.

"I want to see her," I said barely above a whisper. He took my hand in both of his. He sat in the chair next to me.

"Leah, you need to rest. Don't stress yourself out. It's only going make you worry, and you won't heal as fast," he started. He made it seem as if he wanted to say more. My eyebrows came together.

"What else is there Denver?" I asked knowingly. He sighed and closed his eyes. My hand went to his cheek. He looked back up to me.

"Adalyn might not be... normal," he picked his words carefully. I nodded. I knew that already when she was born premature.

"We can only hope for the best," I smiled sadly. He grabbed my hand and kissed it. "Can you please get the nurse to put me under? I don't want to be awake right now." He nodded sadly. I would stay under all month if I had to. All I wanted was Adalyn in my arms.

~

I was running towards her. I screamed when I saw I wasn't getting anywhere. Now would've been a good time to wake up, but I couldn't. I was trapped in this never-ending-nightmare by the medicine. Tears ran down my face as my little girl smiled at me. I slumped to the ground on my knees. Adalyn had Denver's eyes. She had my cheek bones and pointed chin. Her hair was dirty blonde like mine. It flowed a little past her shoulders in loose curls. She looked as if she was three or four. She wore a simple white blouse and a white skirt. She was suddenly right beside me. Her smile melted my heart. Her tiny hand reached out and touched my face.