The girl with secrets

Fifty Four

3 months later

They tried to keep me in the hospital but I refused, I told them if I've got only a month left what the point. I'd rather be in my home than be in a hospital room.

Any day.

Any day now and I'm gone.

I'm in pain all of the time and at this point I just want to go.

The pain is excruciating, it's constant.

I can't sleep, I'm not hungry, I'm physically and mentally exhausted.

I've asked everyone to come to see me today, I need to say goodbye to everyone before I can't.

"Hey you wanted to see us?" Ellie asks walking in

"Yeah" i say and they sir down on the edge of my bed

"I just want to say thank you" i tell them

"For what?" Bella asks

"Giving me some lifelong friends, creating memories. I never really had proper friends before you guys came along and I'm so grateful that you're in my life" I tell them and Freya starts crying

"Don't cry please, cause I've got to hold it together for everyone else I have to talk to" i say and they chuckle lightly

"Ellie" I ask and she looks at me

"I'm going to ask you to be patient with Jordan, he's stubborn and I'm afraid he'll act out" i tell her and she nods

"Don't worry, I'll look after him" she says and i nod

"I love you girls so much" I say and they all hug me

"We love you too"

•

•

"Hi Holls" Ryder says walking into the room with Ace, Issac, Raymond and Kelly

"I just wanted to talk to you guys because, you guys have been like my second family" I say and Kelly starts crying.

"Now I hope you all, are going to be strong for Finn" I tell them and they nod

"I can see it now, he's going to act out, lash out and I need you to not give up on him because as much as he's pushing away his feelings to be strong for me, it's only a matter of time before he breaks" I tell them and they nod

"Ryder, Ace, Issac i hope you guys do well for yourselves, go to college. Get a good job, meet someone nice. I want you guys to be happy because your like family to me, your my brothers" I say and they start crying

"I love you all, your my family whether you like it or not" i say and they all give me a smile

"We love you too"

•

•

"Hey honey how are you feeling?" My mom asks me and I shrug

"I need to talk to you both" I tell them and they look at each other before sitting down on my bed

"Now, any day now I'm not going to be here anymore" I say and my mom starts crying

"Now, I want you to not grieve over me for too long. I know that's hard because I'm your daughter but I need you to know that I could have not have a better life. You two, are the best parents in the entire world and I'm so glad that you raised me to be who I am today" I say gripping their hands

"Now, please don't argue once I'm gone. Don't get ratty, talk to each other because the last thing this family needs is a divorce and you two need to be strong and not fail. I love you two more than anything in the world and I'm so happy that you have given me life I've always wanted" i tell them and they are both crying