My Diary Literally

Motherly Love

So as you all should know today I wasn't going to hang with Will because he pms' on mondays. Luckily I had to host a party for our schools G.S.A. Anyways.

Me and my friend Lexi had gone outside to wait for the pizza guy to come and I saw this guy who is really cute. I don't know his name because for some reason no matter how many times im told it I just forget.

I first met him at the beginning of the school year because I'm the slowest to get out of my engineering class. I was still logging off the computer when the next class came and I happened to be sitting at his computer. From that happening about twenty times, mostly on purpose we began to build an informal friendship.

So, while we were waiting for pizza I was talking to him and convinced him to come and get some food. I basically was throwing food at him telling him to eat one thing or another.

Basically the whole time I was hosting the party he followed me even though he knew a lot of other people there. It gave me a sense of comfort knowing in a way he was loyal. Maybe it is true the best way into a guys heart is through his stomach.

I'm curious why I am cursed to always fall for guys that are probably a million times higher then me on the gay scale. It's like i'm a moth attracted to the light or a monkey attracted to a shiny object. It kind of makes me depressed but who knows maybe this time the guy will actually be gay. I'm just glad that at least he is willing to be a non-awkward guy friend.

I'm sorry I'm writing this backwards but I need to think back to remember everything that happened today. Before GSA started.... About four periods earlier to be exact. We were Taking tests on the squids we dissected last week.

They smelt rancid. As usual I partnered with my old friend and first crush, Lenny. Basically i'm a little bit of a Girly gay so I partner with him so he'll do all the dissecting. Anyways, he was getting his papers and all the guys where standing around the dissected squid filled bucket all gagging and saying they didn't want to touch it, even though we were wearing gloves. So somehow I got the balls to grab a squid out of the bucket. I bet all those guys where feeling like they had no balls since a gay guy just grabbed his while they where all wining.

When Lenny got there to help position the squid so we can take our test he started gagging so I went back to class, grabbed my cologne, and sprayed the hell out of our squid. Basically it smelt like our squid was going to proms while everyone else's was a prom night dumpster baby.

So, the point of telling about the squid dissection is because for basically the first time in my life Lenny got a better test score then me. I was crushed because he'a literally better looking then any god or men from myth and legends. Hell i'll even say he is more attractive then Michael angelo'd sculpture of the perfectly chiseled man ;P but, while he was beautiful his mind wasn't gifted so I always helped him with class work and teased him when I got a better grade. I feel like a mother who's son is growing up faster then you are ready to handle. I want him to need me because If he doesn't then I am worthless. Have any of you ever felt like that?