Shadewylf

21 - Evania

I can't do this.

Not even pacing could calm Toivo's nerves as he weaved between the trees, trying his best to keep his breathing level. Through the leaves above, he could see the dark sky paling far quicker than he wanted it to.

Light meant day. Day meant his mission. And his mission meant extreme panic.

It was strange how talking through everything with Konrad the previous evening and staring at the map had felt so calm compared to this. While Lexi had slept, he'd been planning his every move - where the prisons would roughly be, how to act around other Shadewylves, what his cover story was if anyone asked - and he'd almost felt excited at the prospect. It was like a hero's tale, the sort he'd read about, where the hero bravely rescues everyone.

Now it seemed less like a noble quest and more like a waking nightmare.

What didn't help was how he'd still managed to sink into an actual nightmare, the same one that had plagued him the two nights previous, even in the brief snatch of sleep he'd allowed himself. Though they'd spent the other half of the night walking here with an army of Icewylves in tow, the trails of pure darkness that lurked in his dreams still hadn't fully left him.

The soft sound of paws padding nearer tugged at his ears. Glancing back, he saw Konrad, eyes as hard as ever. Toivo still found it strange how he, as well as all the other Icewylves hiding in the woods behind, moved so lightly in contrast to their bulky size. On the way here, Lexi had mentioned that it was something to do with pressure and area, but her exact words had already escaped him.

"Stop working yourself into a panic." The chief's voice was commanding, far from the soft comfort Lexi's tone might have provided, but it snapped his attention all the same.

"I don't think I can choose not to panic," he replied shakily, ducking his head under Konrad's huge shadow. A white nose wedged under his head, levering his snout upwards before he could bow it to point at the earth.

"Of course you can. Panic is always a choice." Releasing his snout, Konrad stared at him fiercly. Meeting his gaze, Toivo forced his head to stay raised and his shoulders to remain tensed. "By pacing here, thinking in circles about how nervous you are and how everything will go terribly in there, you create your own panic. All that rely on thoughts too much do the same. You probably got it from spending too much time with your Thunderwylf friend." He jerked his snout over to where Lexi stood.

Toivo couldn't help but follow the gaze to her. She was crouched partially behind a huge pine tree, pinned there by Miyuki. The Icewylf's pale eyes were much less fierce as she muttered to Lexi, her tone too quiet to make out but friendly enough. As his eyes settled on Lexi's golden coat, she looked up from her conversation and shot him a smile. He grinned back, making to mouthe something, but Konrad yanked his attention back.

"Focus, young Toivo. She doesn't matter at the moment." He gestured in the opposite direction. "What matters is you getting in there, and us getting the Twilytra out. You can let her dote on you later."

"She doesn't dote on me," Toivo protested. They were friends. She just helped him out sometimes. He did the same for her - she just seemed to need less help than he did.

Konrad sighed. "Call it whatever you want. You miss the point. But you're not panicking now, so I'll take it." Raising his gaze to the canopy, he began to retreat towards the others. "Our sunlight is in position. It's your time to shine. Good luck."

With that, the Wylfrost chief joined the rest of the white fur, and Toivo was on his own.

He took a deep breath, doing his best to focus on Konrad's advice. I can do this. Maybe. I'll have a go. He released a sigh of his own. That'll do.