The Void Between Hearts ~~ongoing~~

46. Ivan

I laugh again, imagining the drama that would have followed that dance.

"You are beautiful," I say.

She smiles, "I know that."

"The picture you sent didn't do enough justice. "

She laughs, "aww. Thanks."

"Are they going for their honeymoon immediately?"

"They don't want to tell me yet. But I know they have plans."

"They're probably scared of breaking your little heart." I poke her chest.

She spanks my hand off.

"Ouch."

She smiles, "I think you're right though."

"Of course, I am." I say.

She throws me a squint.

I smile.

"It's a bit sad you know," she says. "With Mom being married now, and Chinny off to Calabar next month, it's like I'm losing my family. With Chinny, I have come to terms with it, and I'm excited for her, would probably even travel to Calabar. "

"Really?"

She chuckles, "just kidding."

"That's better," I say.

She laughs some more.

"But with Mom though, I don't want to keep her with me. You know, I'm not exactly going to be here for much longer."

She looks at me to see my reaction.

I smile and shrug.

She smiles too.

"It's okay." I tell her.

She rests her head on my shoulder, and pulls her fingers to her face.

Not long after, she begins crying. It breaks my heart and a small community of tears begin to gather in my own eyes. I pull her in closer and stroke her hair.

I let her cry because she needs to. Boxing up her fears and pain is the exact thing Dr. Stella counselled against.

She pulls her head up. "I feel my body get weaker everyday." A sob shakes her head back to my shoulder.

I hand her my pocket square.

She laughs. "It's becoming a trend, your pocket squares end up wiping my tears."

I smile, "that's an even better purpose, next time would be tears of joy."

She smiles, "lately, every breath feels like a chore. Like I feel myself dying, and it's not a great feeling at all. I'm so scared all the time."

"I wish I could take it all away." I say.

"I don't wish that," she says. "I wish I never had to be this way."

"Shhh. Boma, you're going to be okay."

She looks up at me.

These blue eyes would be the death of me.

"I am." She affirms.

"You are." I echo.

"You know," she smiles. "I used to have these silly bucket lists I wrote every year since I was eleven. I have them littered on my wall."

"I'd love to hear about them."

"Now?"

"It's not a scroll list, is it?" I ask