I Burn [Todoroki x Reader]

55/100 Composed

Your POV

Since coming into the Todoroki household, you did your best to keep a low profile and although Endeavor disapproved of you being in his home, he hasn't kicked you out...yet.

Though you were glad for Todoroki's help, you couldn't help but be worried that you were only burdening them but Shoto and his sister had explained that it wasn't the case.

If only you were a little stronger. If only you could control your quirk a little better then perhaps you wouldn't feel helpless when faced with your brother.

Just the thought of him gave you a headache. He wasn't going to give up on you, that much you know, however, you weren't just going to lie down to be taken away by him.

Getting stronger was something you never really thought of. It was never part of the future you wanted for yourself, before Todoroki, all you wanted was to live a peaceful life without having to use your quirk.

Now it was different. To protect everything you cared about, you have to get stronger. Being useless and relying on everyone around you was something you could no longer do. 

So on the days that you had free time or when you're not hanging out with Todoroki, you found yourself a quiet place to meditate. 

Meditating, you found it to be quite helpful. It helped you focus on what you needed to work on, your head still hurts whenever you use your quirk but, the meditation helped you last longer without the harmful repercussions.

You limited yourself to one hour of meditation a day. Bit by bit, you looked for the source of your pain. It was somewhere in your head, you could feel it but whenever you get close to it, something pushes you out. It was suspicious especially when you thought that the reason you couldn't use your quirk properly was because of your brain.

"Dammit. I was so close this time." You muttered in frustration, your head was pounding in pain but it was something you decided to ride out. 

"Just a little longer...I'll find the cause of this. Just a little…"

You closed your eyes once again and focused, the background sounds slowly drifted away leaving you only with the loud beating of your heart. You could see with your mind's eye the neural pathways of your brain, following the synapses as you navigate your way to the root of your problem.

However, each time you get close to it, something blocks you from getting any closer which causes you extreme pain. You tried working through it, hoping that this time you would break through the invisible barrier.

You could feel it breaking, whatever it was, but just as you thought you had done it. An image flashed in your mind, a vision of a beautiful couple and a child. They were happy. Content. They were a family.

It was a picture of a happy family so why did it feel as if your chest was about to burst, the pain you felt ran deeper than any pain that you had ever felt. What was it about them to invoke such an emotional reaction from you.

You felt happy one moment then sad the next but what stood out the most was the overwhelming sense of guilt that seemed to have risen from out of nowhere.

You couldn't examine them for much longer, the image shattered as distorted images came flooding through. The sudden influx of images jarred you out of your meditation and brought you back to an already darkened room.

Your vision couldn't focus properly, the room spun around you and your head pounded in pain. You overdid it, you knew, and yet you found it such a pity that you couldn't progress much. You wanted to keep going, you were so close.